I have a question? Regarding Fellatio follow through..

[mary_30]

Calll it silly be here it goes.. I been training to be a salve for my master.. I Actullay I enjoy giving my master a Fellation in anyother postions but when he ask me when he lays in bed, he request for me come to him and go down on I cant go through it I find excuses t avoid that positin. I acutally find it boring. I told my master I just cant focus to follow through in this positon. However if he ask ,me to give him a blow job any where elase it fine. Your advice is appreciated.

 

[NervousGuy]

I'm just a tad bit confused here. You said that you find it boring. Could you elaborate on that. And with you telling him that you could not focus to do it, was that an outright lie or is it true? Any additional info would be appreciated.

 

[Noor]

what makes other positions less boring? Maybe you could fantasize that he is in another position?

 

[rosco rathbone]

Calll it silly be here it goes.. I been training to be a salve for my master.. I Actullay I enjoy giving my master a Fellation in anyother postions but when he ask me when he lays in bed, he request for me come to him and go down on I cant go through it I find excuses t avoid that positin. I acutally find it boring. I told my master I just cant focus to follow through in this positon. However if he ask ,me to give him a blow job any where elase it fine. Your advice is appreciated.

. . . ..

 

[Bandit58]

Certain positions I find increase the gag reflex (Him on His back for one) but He likes when my throat closes up so it's one of His favourites

I don't understand how it could be "boring" in one position but not in others.... I have preferences for my own comfort but if He wants it a certain way He gets it

 

[FunwithRyleigh]

I love to give in any position. Well - let me clarify.... I have yet to find a position I don't enjoy. There could be one out there... but I haven't found it yet.

So - to find one boring.... does not compute.....

It is about the sounds and the textures and the total enjoyment package.... some positions may be more exciting - offer better angles... etc. But - boring?

 

[johnnieblue44]

I love to give in any position. Well - let me clarify.... I have yet to find a position I don't enjoy. There could be one out there... but I haven't found it yet.

So - to find one boring.... does not compute.....

It is about the sounds and the textures and the total enjoyment package.... some positions may be more exciting - offer better angles... etc. But - boring?

wherever there is a fellatio thread, Ryles is sure to follow..it's like the swallows returning to Capistrano..that's why I love her so.....

xo

 

[wicked woman]

Taking a different perspective than others...if you're training to be a slave, that you're bored may be a fact (although personally I don't understand it) but it shouldn't be your main concern. My guess is there will be all sorts of things he'll want you to do that you won't like to do/enjoy, but you'll be required to do them.

I think my question is....what's your priority here? His pleasure or yours?

 

[Etoile]

I agree with wicked woman. The OP mentioned that she is in training to be a slave, which to me emphasizes that she knows the difference between slave and submissive. I would not be so concerned about why it's boring as much as the fact that most slaves don't usually get to refuse to do something just because it's boring. If you have a cold and you can't breathe through your nose, then you can probably get out of sucking cock for a little while. But "I don't want to" is not a very slave-like attitude IMO.

 

[mary_30]

Clarifying

I never said I did not want to do it. It is that i cant focus at all to finish giving him blowjob in this positon. This is real question. Does any one have sugestion.

 

[Etoile]

I never said I did not want to do it. It is that i cant focus at all to finish giving him blowjob in this positon. This is real question. Does any one have sugestion.

Fair enough, though you did say you find excuses not to do it, which does sound like you don't want to do it, at least in that position.

During my blowjob-giving days (so to speak) I always concentrated on doing an excellent job. It filled pretty much all of my thought capacity. I never really got bored because I was always thinking about how I could be doing it better. (Let's say drawing the alphabet doesn't cut it when giving a blowjob.)

 

[Essene]

Fair enough, though you did say you find excuses not to do it, which does sound like you don't want to do it, at least in that position.

During my blowjob-giving days (so to speak) I always concentrated on doing an excellent job. It filled pretty much all of my thought capacity. I never really got bored because I was always thinking about how I could be doing it better. (Let's say drawing the alphabet doesn't cut it when giving a blowjob.)

*nod* I'm not quite getting exactly which position is coming into question. If he's lying down and you're on top, you could take the opportunity while having control to focus on taking more of it into your throat (if this is not a talent that you've mastered yet).
I used to find it to be intimidating, yet arousing, so that was a good position for me to try things like that out.
I dunno. Usually if I enjoy serving, then I really enjoy making Him/Her happy. The whole boredom thing is kind of foreign to me I guess.

 

[Wyldfire]

I never said I did not want to do it. It is that i cant focus at all to finish giving him blowjob in this positon. This is real question. Does any one have sugestion.

Subbie up an deal with it! Make it as tough or easy as you want it. The main poimt is this, you have chosen to be his sub. Follow his orders or change your freaking lifestyle. "Your Focus" is unimportant. You chose to sub to him you do as he wishes.

Can't do it? Then change your lifestyle.

 

[Netzach]

Subbie up an deal with it! Make it as tough or easy as you want it. The main poimt is this, you have chosen to be his sub. Follow his orders or change your freaking lifestyle. "Your Focus" is unimportant. You chose to sub to him you do as he wishes.

Can't do it? Then change your lifestyle.

Are you on the market?

No? Perhaps I could buy you dinner.

 

[Wyldfire]

Are you on the market?

No? Perhaps I could buy you dinner.

I have a pair of Dominants.

But I will always accept dinner dates, at least with thier approval.

 

[madetotakeit]

I agree some positions are more comfortable than others. I also have to agree with the others that don't understand boring coming into play. Unless you don't enjoy the act to begin with, it is a wonderful opportunity no matter what positions your bodies are in.

The focus should be on the man in front of you. His cock is unique. There is no other like it. Concentrate on the shape, the feel, the taste. How does it react when you alter what you are doing? Listen for his breathing and note what causes a change. Does he make a particular sound when you apply a certain amount of pressure? Use your lips, your tongue, even your teeth if used properly. Find out what makes him moan. If you are concentrating on him then there will be no room in your mind for what position you are in. I have never had a time when I thought about how I might prefer another position or if I am feeling any discomfort. In fact I don't. My jaws may be sore the next day, but when I have a cock in my mouth all of my concentration is on that. Granted this is something that I love and can do for hours when given the chance.

 

[Wyldfire]

I agree some positions are more comfortable than others. I also have to agree with the others that don't understand boring coming into play. Unless you don't enjoy the act to begin with, it is a wonderful opportunity no matter what positions your bodies are in.

The focus should be on the man in front of you. His cock is unique. There is no other like it. Concentrate on the shape, the feel, the taste. How does it react when you alter what you are doing? Listen for his breathing and note what causes a change. Does he make a particular sound when you apply a certain amount of pressure? Use your lips, your tongue, even your teeth if used properly. Find out what makes him moan. If you are concentrating on him then there will be no room in your mind for what position you are in. I have never had a time when I thought about how I might prefer another position or if I am feeling any discomfort. In fact I don't. My jaws may be sore the next day, but when I have a cock in my mouth all of my concentration is on that. Granted this is something that I love and can do for hours when given the chance.

All of which is unimportant in a BDSM relationship. You have given yourself to him. All the points you bring up are unimportant to the truth that you have given yourself to your dominant. Your desires and wants are unimportant to the giving of your submission to them.

Again I say, either Sub up or find a different lifestyle.

 

[madetotakeit]

All of which is unimportant in a BDSM relationship. You have given yourself to him. All the points you bring up are unimportant to the truth that you have given yourself to your dominant. Your desires and wants are unimportant to the giving of your submission to them.

Again I say, either Sub up or find a different lifestyle.

I will disagree that the advice I gave is unimportant in a BDSM relationship. How can concentrating on the one you serve and putting his pleasure above all considerations not be part of a D/s dynamic from the sub's perspective?

 

[Essene]

All of which is unimportant in a BDSM relationship. You have given yourself to him. All the points you bring up are unimportant to the truth that you have given yourself to your dominant. Your desires and wants are unimportant to the giving of your submission to them.

Again I say, either Sub up or find a different lifestyle.

I agree with your previous statement, but as far as giving tips on how to create a better experience not being pertinent, I would have to disagree.

Saying " i cant focus at all to finish giving him blowjob in this positon." Is utter BS to me too, but she DID also say that she would like tips on how to do a better job. So I guess the main factor for me would be whether or not Mary is just looking for tips, to alleviate her arduous task, or that she is asking for tips because she really wants to be better at it - that is key.

Motivation is key, and I think she deserves a few Brownie points for asking for help if her desire is to better perform - as opposed to figuring the the way that a boring task can least impact her.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Subbie up an deal with it! Make it as tough or easy as you want it. The main poimt is this, you have chosen to be his sub. Follow his orders or change your freaking lifestyle. "Your Focus" is unimportant. You chose to sub to him you do as he wishes.

Can't do it? Then change your lifestyle.

I completely agree with this. If you're not prepared to do things that you find boring and tedious for your Master, then you are just not slave material honey. Was it your idea that you become a slave or his? If it's not something you're cut out for, then you should say so sooner rather than later.

I really don't want to find out what my Master would do if he requested a BJ and halfway through, I whined that I couldn't focus. He'd damn well focus the shit out of me. Your Master is too lenient and letting you get away with murder IMHO. Combined with your apparently half-assed approach to slavery, this looks like a recipe for disaster from where I'm sitting.

Your 'focus' should be his pleasure. Period.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Motivation is key, and I think she deserves a few Brownie points for asking for help if her desire is to better serve - as opposed to figuring the the way that a boring task can least impact her.

Agreed. If that's the case though, her choice of wording was very poor.

 

[intothewoods]

Focus on the reaction. Make it a challenge to evoke a certain reaction out of your Master.

 

[Hisscarlett]

In reading the original post a few thoughts occured to me.

You say you are in training to be your Master's slave - I would imagine from that statement that you have negotiated with your Master and understand the difference between a submissive and a slave. Also the differences between a scene slave and a life slave (or whatever terms you choose to define the difference between play and 24/7). Furthermore I would imagine that you have agreed to be his slave.

You then use words such as "ask" and "request" in relation his demand. I imagine that this is because you are early in your training and he is taking things slowly.

Taking things slowly can be good, it allows you both to get used to the new dynamic and work through rules and protocols.

Taking all that into account I can understand why you may try to avoid that position. But in the long term you will not have that choice, indeed it is unusual for a Master to allow that degree of choice even early in slave training from my experience.

But all that aside, your question was for advice on how to get focus.

When Master started training me to suck his cock to his pleasure it was hard work, I was having to concentrate and think constantly. There was little if any scope for my enjoyment, but that wasn`t the purpose of the exercise. I did enjoy it but I had to keep my focus purely on him and his reactions. It wasn`t about me at all. I was merely the tool for his pleasure. It also was extremely painful at times, my jaw and neck would become sore and stiff, my tongue would become tired and I would gag and choke as he fucked my throat. Emotionally it was not fun either as I started to feel useless and that I was a failure as his slave. I had never sucked cock before, Master is my first Owner.

I loved doing it, loved the way he responded to my tongue and mouth, I couldn`t get enough of it but it was all about him and his desires. And gradually the feelings of failure and incompetence made me dread doing something I knew was essential to him.

I found that I couldn`t suck him `properly`when he was on his back, there was a mental block that made me freeze and lose the flow. So I think I understand what you mean when you say you lose focus.

However, I don`t have a clue what you mean when you say you find it boring. Sucking Master`s cock is never, ever boring!

The way I got past the block of that position was to talk to Master, though he was well aware of the problem. It was, after all, his cock in my mouth when I got confused and lost. Also, as my Owner, he was aware of my emotional state and reaction to what I saw as my failure.

I couldn`t see that it was only in that one position, when he was lying down, that there was a problem. The way I was able to pleasure him in other positions became lost in my mind and all I was focussing on was that one position.

He decided that he would take a step back and work with me on improving my technique as first he stood over me, then graduated to him being seated and then to lying down.

It took time. Believe me, there were several failed attempts, but each time he adjusted my head or gave instructions and it happened.

One day I was feeling useless and frustrated, struggling to find the flow and the next day something clicked, my instincts took over and the back of my head was almost blown off. I think I was even happier than he was with that particular orgasm!

It was down to determination on my part to please and his Mastery of me. I am his property. If he wants me to stand on my head as I suck him then that is what I will learn to do. It won`t be perfect immediately but it would happen.

If he hadn`t been as in step with my feelings, I am not sure it would have been resolved because I found it almost impossible to vocalise. I didn`t really know what the problem was. When I asked to speak to Master about it he told me how I was feeling, which shocked me as I was still struggling to figure it out, and then he told me the solution. It worked perfectly for us. Your Master will, I am sure, know how to solve the situation you are in.

Now I am fully trained in the ways he prefers to have his cock sucked and if he permitted it I would be sucking his cock all day and night. And it is still all about him and his pleasure but because of the time he took to train me to it I don`t have to think as much, it happens instinctively, focus is not an issue, instead I can concentrate on intensifying his pleasure and trying to surprise him with little things to make it better for him and just glorying in the pleasure of being allowed to serve my Master with my mouth.

I am not sure that this answers your question. I just know that, from my own experience, it gets easier. Positions you find hard now will become pure heaven to you with time and effort. I agree completely with the above comment that there is no bad position. It is just such a wonderful act of service and darned good fun too. I just suggest that you try to mentally accept the idea that your focus is to please and serve your Master. If that is not something you want, then maybe you could speak to your Master about that too.

I wish you well on your journey with your Master and in this issue.

 

[00Syd]

I don't understand getting bored, but I could understand it becoming tiring, especially if he lasts a long time. Is that what you mean?

 

[SubKekiLee]

In reading the original post a few thoughts occured to me.

You say you are in training to be your Master's slave - I would imagine from that statement that you have negotiated with your Master and understand the difference between a submissive and a slave. Also the differences between a scene slave and a life slave (or whatever terms you choose to define the difference between play and 24/7). Furthermore I would imagine that you have agreed to be his slave.

You then use words such as "ask" and "request" in relation his demand. I imagine that this is because you are early in your training and he is taking things slowly.

Taking things slowly can be good, it allows you both to get used to the new dynamic and work through rules and protocols.

Taking all that into account I can understand why you may try to avoid that position. But in the long term you will not have that choice, indeed it is unusual for a Master to allow that degree of choice even early in slave training from my experience.

But all that aside, your question was for advice on how to get focus.

When Master started training me to suck his cock to his pleasure it was hard work, I was having to concentrate and think constantly. There was little if any scope for my enjoyment, but that wasn`t the purpose of the exercise. I did enjoy it but I had to keep my focus purely on him and his reactions. It wasn`t about me at all. I was merely the tool for his pleasure. It also was extremely painful at times, my jaw and neck would become sore and stiff, my tongue would become tired and I would gag and choke as he fucked my throat. Emotionally it was not fun either as I started to feel useless and that I was a failure as his slave. I had never sucked cock before, Master is my first Owner.

I loved doing it, loved the way he responded to my tongue and mouth, I couldn`t get enough of it but it was all about him and his desires. And gradually the feelings of failure and incompetence made me dread doing something I knew was essential to him.

I found that I couldn`t suck him `properly`when he was on his back, there was a mental block that made me freeze and lose the flow. So I think I understand what you mean when you say you lose focus.

However, I don`t have a clue what you mean when you say you find it boring. Sucking Master`s cock is never, ever boring!

The way I got past the block of that position was to talk to Master, though he was well aware of the problem. It was, after all, his cock in my mouth when I got confused and lost. Also, as my Owner, he was aware of my emotional state and reaction to what I saw as my failure.

I couldn`t see that it was only in that one position, when he was lying down, that there was a problem. The way I was able to pleasure him in other positions became lost in my mind and all I was focussing on was that one position.

He decided that he would take a step back and work with me on improving my technique as first he stood over me, then graduated to him being seated and then to lying down.

It took time. Believe me, there were several failed attempts, but each time he adjusted my head or gave instructions and it happened.

One day I was feeling useless and frustrated, struggling to find the flow and the next day something clicked, my instincts took over and the back of my head was almost blown off. I think I was even happier than he was with that particular orgasm!

It was down to determination on my part to please and his Mastery of me. I am his property. If he wants me to stand on my head as I suck him then that is what I will learn to do. It won`t be perfect immediately but it would happen.

If he hadn`t been as in step with my feelings, I am not sure it would have been resolved because I found it almost impossible to vocalise. I didn`t really know what the problem was. When I asked to speak to Master about it he told me how I was feeling, which shocked me as I was still struggling to figure it out, and then he told me the solution. It worked perfectly for us. Your Master will, I am sure, know how to solve the situation you are in.

Now I am fully trained in the ways he prefers to have his cock sucked and if he permitted it I would be sucking his cock all day and night. And it is still all about him and his pleasure but because of the time he took to train me to it I don`t have to think as much, it happens instinctively, focus is not an issue, instead I can concentrate on intensifying his pleasure and trying to surprise him with little things to make it better for him and just glorying in the pleasure of being allowed to serve my Master with my mouth.

I am not sure that this answers your question. I just know that, from my own experience, it gets easier. Positions you find hard now will become pure heaven to you with time and effort. I agree completely with the above comment that there is no bad position. It is just such a wonderful act of service and darned good fun too. I just suggest that you try to mentally accept the idea that your focus is to please and serve your Master. If that is not something you want, then maybe you could speak to your Master about that too.

I wish you well on your journey with your Master and in this issue.

Couldnt have said it any better myself... Thanks for your words of advice and encouragement.. If those of us that are with thier PYL.. It was worth reading..