Cicca_Jai
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2009
- Posts
- 862
Dear gents.
We hear you lamenting on the lack of attention you receive.
We have decided to break out the super secret decoder rings just for you.
Why? I know it's shocking but, we are sick of your sh*t.
We are sick, and we are tired and we will assist you if you will just pay attention.
So, pop some popcorn, turn off the game, sit down, shut up and read.
There will also be a thread on HOW TO approach a lady properly. http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=70808324#post70808324
Items you will need Pen - Paper - Distraction free room to study from.
Thank you kindly,
~C~
Lesson One:
Never be a Douche.
Even if she is being just awful, you are a man, fracking act like one. Unless, of course, you are some butt hurt baby boy who needs his nappy changed. In which case your science class teacher is calling your name; get back to your studies this is for the adults.
Lesson Two:
This is Not the Way Young Blood.
How NOT to approach a lady via electronic communication.
This is an actual conversation I had with some D-bag on FB.
I was not impressed as you will see.
Him- Add her, email her, etc...
Him- "Hello"
Her- "Do I know you?"
Radio silence - 20 mins later
Him- "No, I just added you."
Her- "We have no one in common...."
Him- "That's ok, I don't mind *winky face*"
Her- "....."
Him- "so what's your name pretty?"
Her- "Err, you add ppl without even looking @ their name?"
Him- "Sometimes."
Her- What she is thinking- (Great a creeper...)
What she says- Her- " >.> joy."
Decoded:
>.> is the face of annoyance. Learn it well.
Him- "Are you still marred, where do you live?"
Decoded:
Making assumptions never ends well.
You have no idea what her relationship status is, if she is still wounded in some profound way and you poke a stick in there... BAD PLAN!
Worse, he's done this WHILE I am PMSY. (AND YES, I'M PMSY as I write this post now.- sue me) You Sir. at this point are double screwed.
Give up now. Slither away while you still can.
Her- "That would none of your business. I think my BF needs to kick your ass!
Seriously, you're just gonna roll up on some random chick with your back-woods, white-boy, piss poor grammar, mack and just expect her to fall into your scrawny ass arms? For real now.... You must be drunk Or high, or both.... How about you tell me where you live, and your kids' school name?
That would be fucking creepy as, yo. Right? ..."
(You were warned)
Him- No response. Total silence.
Her- "Yes. See, that is what I'm saying. You need to buy some class. Toodles."
Decoded:
The following is also an annoyed face, sometimes it can mean bored though so puzzle it out with great care before you make your next move.
Her- "-_- "
Him- "You mad at me?"
Decoded-
On the three star scale: 1 being Ok let's talk and 3 being: Please drop dead RIGHT NOW! You have just scored a 3: You are just too stupid to be allowed to live. However, you are here and murder is frowned upon, so please DO NOT REPRODUCE! I recommend 3 raincoats for every outing.
She then goes to the person's pg, UID etc and blocks your dumb ass.
To summarize:
Don't go jumping into the pond unless you know the area a little. Least ye come back with a snapper attached to your dingy.
This is a prime example of how NOT to get a chick to talk to you. Take notes, read it several times. Practice in the mirror.... DO BETTER!
Lesson Three- Form Letters: No. Never. Ever. Just. No.
You are lazy, and stupid, and do not care.
Why should we? To thine iggy bin you are here by banished forevermore.
You may now applaud.
~C~
We hear you lamenting on the lack of attention you receive.
We have decided to break out the super secret decoder rings just for you.
Why? I know it's shocking but, we are sick of your sh*t.
We are sick, and we are tired and we will assist you if you will just pay attention.
So, pop some popcorn, turn off the game, sit down, shut up and read.
There will also be a thread on HOW TO approach a lady properly. http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=70808324#post70808324
Items you will need Pen - Paper - Distraction free room to study from.
Thank you kindly,
~C~
Lesson One:
Never be a Douche.
Even if she is being just awful, you are a man, fracking act like one. Unless, of course, you are some butt hurt baby boy who needs his nappy changed. In which case your science class teacher is calling your name; get back to your studies this is for the adults.
Lesson Two:
This is Not the Way Young Blood.
How NOT to approach a lady via electronic communication.
This is an actual conversation I had with some D-bag on FB.
I was not impressed as you will see.
Him- Add her, email her, etc...
Him- "Hello"
Her- "Do I know you?"
Radio silence - 20 mins later
Him- "No, I just added you."
Her- "We have no one in common...."
Him- "That's ok, I don't mind *winky face*"
Her- "....."
Him- "so what's your name pretty?"
Her- "Err, you add ppl without even looking @ their name?"
Him- "Sometimes."
Her- What she is thinking- (Great a creeper...)
What she says- Her- " >.> joy."
Decoded:
>.> is the face of annoyance. Learn it well.
Him- "Are you still marred, where do you live?"
Decoded:
Making assumptions never ends well.
You have no idea what her relationship status is, if she is still wounded in some profound way and you poke a stick in there... BAD PLAN!
Worse, he's done this WHILE I am PMSY. (AND YES, I'M PMSY as I write this post now.- sue me) You Sir. at this point are double screwed.
Give up now. Slither away while you still can.
Her- "That would none of your business. I think my BF needs to kick your ass!
Seriously, you're just gonna roll up on some random chick with your back-woods, white-boy, piss poor grammar, mack and just expect her to fall into your scrawny ass arms? For real now.... You must be drunk Or high, or both.... How about you tell me where you live, and your kids' school name?
That would be fucking creepy as, yo. Right? ..."
(You were warned)
Him- No response. Total silence.
Her- "Yes. See, that is what I'm saying. You need to buy some class. Toodles."
Decoded:
The following is also an annoyed face, sometimes it can mean bored though so puzzle it out with great care before you make your next move.
Her- "-_- "
Him- "You mad at me?"
Decoded-
On the three star scale: 1 being Ok let's talk and 3 being: Please drop dead RIGHT NOW! You have just scored a 3: You are just too stupid to be allowed to live. However, you are here and murder is frowned upon, so please DO NOT REPRODUCE! I recommend 3 raincoats for every outing.
She then goes to the person's pg, UID etc and blocks your dumb ass.
To summarize:
Don't go jumping into the pond unless you know the area a little. Least ye come back with a snapper attached to your dingy.
This is a prime example of how NOT to get a chick to talk to you. Take notes, read it several times. Practice in the mirror.... DO BETTER!
Lesson Three- Form Letters: No. Never. Ever. Just. No.
You are lazy, and stupid, and do not care.
Why should we? To thine iggy bin you are here by banished forevermore.
You may now applaud.
~C~
Last edited:
you're breaking the hearts of all the men of Lit...
LOL
