How to keep him interested

[eudaemonia]

Deliciously sweet.

Morning date, huh? Great idea of shaking things up. I'll have to file that one in my to-do folder.

 

[ntrprs]

Shit!

I hate him already!

 

[h_i_s]

KarenDee ...
Whatever you have been doing .... just keep on doing it.
Sounds to me like you are doing fine.
Most important advice anyone could give you:
Always be yourself.
Relax, and have fun ... enjoy.
Outside of that, anyone who doesn't find you interesting, and enjoy the time spent with you... most likely, isn't the one for you anyway.

 

[INSIDEYOURMIND]

A big plus is he already has handcuffs!

 

[KarenDee]

A big plus is he already has handcuffs!

LOL, I have not experienced the pleasure of those yet.

 

[covariant]

LOL, I have not experienced the pleasure of those yet.

Ah, something to look forward to on the next date!

More seriously, I'm glad things seem to be going well for you.

 

[Onanymous]

.....

 

[KarenDee]

I'm not sure that "romantic love" is the worst reason to marry someone (assuming that you are entertaining the thought), but compatibility and common interests matter more.

Wow! Marrying? My god, I just met the guy. Farthest thing from my mind is marriage right now. Not sure where you got that idea.

But anyway, thanks for the good wishes, those I do appreciate!

 

[h_i_s]

Well, I'm going to throw some cold water on you, Karen. No one is as perfect or as great as they seem when dating--people are usually on their "best behavior" then. We see all the "right things" and ignore whatever we'd rather not pay attention to. (When i met my Husband, neither of us behaved. It was what attracted us to each other in the first place. i do agree with going in with both eyes wide open though.

The result is that, when things go sour, or the thrill wears off, all the problems are ones that were there right from the start.Not always true, but it CAN be for some. The key is, most always, in 'communicating openly, and truthfully ... right from the start.

I'm not sure that "romantic love" is the worst reason to marry someone (assuming that you are entertaining the thought), but compatibility and common interests matter more.NO doubts on this point. Who realistically spends all day being all 'kissy-kissy .. lovey-dovey, and spends 24/7 having sex. There had better be something else that both can enjoy together ... outside of the bedroom.

What are his political views? What's his relationship with his family like? How has he progressed in his career? Is he comfortable in his own skin and happy with his current life, or does he seem troubled? Does he brood?i'd have left it at 'being happy with theirself'. Most of the other things are not quite always essential to maintaining a good relationship (specifically political views, and family relations).

Have you been to his place? Does he keep it clean? Is he self-disciplined, well organized? Is he obsessive over trivial things? How much does he drink?No doubt here. i can't stand a slob, a drunk, or anyone who is not self-disaplined, responsible who lacks self-respect .. and/or respect for others. GOOD point.

Is he judgemental about others? (I think this is a big one, because tomorrow it may be you).

Just some things to consider. I wouldn't worry about keeping his attention as much as I would worry about whether you will lose interest in him later....

But it also sounds like you are off to a good start.....!!

i can agree with some the points you mention here, but, not all of them. Your advice is from a much more realistci approach though.

 

[Onanymous]

.....

 

[ntrprs]

Hell...

Keep me interested! <bump>

 

[Guest]

 

[TBKahuna123]

OK here's some advice no one has posted yet DON'T CHANGE A THING!

Sounds to me like you are touching something in this guy, just like he's touching you. You've been on three dates, including one where he took you up into the secluded mountains. If he took you intothe woods and didn't try to jump you, you didn't have anything overtly sexual int he way of contact, then you were still holding hands afterwards, then this guy is really interested in you, not just your, um...avatar.

It sounds to me like two level headed adults who are genuinely good people who are getting to know each other, neither one wanting to do anything drastic and scare off the other one. Just keep going slow and easy and things will progress nicely, I think. If it works out, great. if it doesn't, then it wasn't supposed to.

Personally, I'd give it one more date with a few more kisses as the sign, then throw something romantic at him. A candle light dinner or something. This will either be a green light from you to make his move for soemthing more intimate, or his acceptance a green light for you to make your move. If that's what you want.

Have fun! How's it feel to be sixteen and falling in love again?

 

[KarenDee]

Have fun! How's it feel to be sixteen and falling in love again?

LOL...you're embarrassing me all to hell because that's really what it feels like and at 35 I figured I was over that. I guess not. I just chose to try and ignore the feeling, even though I know it's there.

Thanks for the wonderful advice. I know what I'm doing is correct, it's nice though to have the reassurance of a few nice people behind me!

Karen

 

[TBKahuna123]

LOL...you're embarrassing me all to hell because that's really what it feels like and at 35 I figured I was over that. I guess not. I just chose to try and ignore the feeling, even though I know it's there.

Thanks for the wonderful advice. I know what I'm doing is correct, it's nice though to have the reassurance of a few nice people behind me!

Karen

Don't ignore it, savor it! Everyone always says to look on the positive side of things, well here's a perfect example. Hell after a decade of marriage, my wife and I go out of our way to try and recapture that courtship/dating/romance feeling. Imagine how much more fun it is to have those feelings, but to be able to understand and logically savor those emotions, not to mention being with a guy who isn't a stupid teenager.

Revell in it, and have fun!

 

[covariant]

LOL...you're embarrassing me all to hell because that's really what it feels like and at 35 I figured I was over that. I guess not. I just chose to try and ignore the feeling, even though I know it's there.

Trust me, you have no idea how young you really are. Don't ignore it, enjoy it, it doesn't come around that often...

 

[eudaemonia]

LOL...you're embarrassing me all to hell because that's really what it feels like and at 35 I figured I was over that. I guess not. I just chose to try and ignore the feeling, even though I know it's there.

Thanks for the wonderful advice. I know what I'm doing is correct, it's nice though to have the reassurance of a few nice people behind me!

We're definitely behind you on this. Feeling like you're 16 again is a great sign. Take it and RUN!

 

[Eilan]

I think his calm and calculated manner comes from his occupation, since he's a police officer.

Shit, now how did I miss this?

I like cops, but I might be a little biased.

 

[KarenDee]

Shit, now how did I miss this?

I like cops, but I might be a little biased.

LMAO...c'mon gal, out with it.....the handcuffs tipped you off, really!

 

[Eilan]

LMAO...c'mon gal, out with it.....the handcuffs tipped you off, really!

I saw the part about the handcuffs, so I had to read the original post again.

My husband's a recently retired cop.

 

[KarenDee]

Funny thing Eilan, I'm already getting razzed at the club about the handcuffs thing....and I SWEAR we haven't started that yet!

 

[Eilan]

Funny thing Eilan, I'm already getting razzed at the club about the handcuffs thing....and I SWEAR we haven't started that yet!

Funny--I never heard that from my friends/acquaintances.

My hubby hogtied a drunk once, though, which I admit that I find oddly fascinating.

 

[KarenDee]

Funny--I never heard that from my friends/acquaintances.

My hubby hogtied a drunk once, though, which I admit that I find oddly fascinating.

I'm probably as guilty as anyone of watching too many "Cops" shows. I hope he uses the ones with the keys and not those plastic zippy tie things. And fur lining would be nice too!

 

[Eilan]

And fur lining would be nice too!

Mmmmm. . .

 

[TBKahuna123]

I'm probably as guilty as anyone of watching too many "Cops" shows. I hope he uses the ones with the keys and not those plastic zippy tie things. And fur lining would be nice too!

LOL! Bad boys, bad boy, whatcha gonna do...