How To Define 'The Average Literotica Member'

[Cathleen]

This is sort of a rant and maybe it will become a place for all of us to learn about each other, that we are all different, that Lit. is a cross section of many societies. Being a 'Litster' does not mean we are all one way or another - we are not all consumed with sex or sexual issues twenty-four hours a day. We do not have all the answers, but there are many with good information to share from their experiences.

I'm tired of reading 'you'd think since this is a sex board.....' kind of response. Yes, we talk about sex and sexual issues, maybe more then your friend, your sibling etc. But it doesn't mean we are all sexually promiscuous, sexually foolish or even sexually liberal, being here only means we can discuss the subject of sex and issues involving sex.

We also discuss other topics too, a wide variety of topics. We can agree or disagree with each other, we can learn as well as provide information - it is called human interaction. We all think differently, personally I'm very glad for that fact.

If someone can define the 'average Litster' please be my guest but I'd rather keep our differences and learn more then be the same or average.

How about we use this thread to discuss issues in our lives that bother us or we are confused about - a sort of miscellaneous or general issue thread. A place to share experiences on many topics. We might learn something new, consider something new and maybe make some friends.

Anyone game?

 

[DLL]

Originally posted by Cathleen
This is sort of a rant and maybe it will become a place for all of us to learn about each other, that we are all different, that Lit. is a cross section of many societies. Being a 'Litster' does not mean we are all one way or another - we are not all consumed with sex or sexual issues twenty-four hours a day. We do not have all the answers, but there are many with good information to share from their experiences.

I'm tired of reading 'you'd think since this is a sex board.....' kind of response. Yes, we talk about sex and sexual issues, maybe more then your friend, your sibling etc. But it doesn't mean we are all sexually promiscuous, sexually foolish or even sexually liberal, being here only means we can discuss the subject of sex and issues involving sex.

We also discuss other topics too, a wide variety of topics. We can agree or disagree with each other, we can learn as well as provide information - it is called human interaction. We all think differently, personally I'm very glad for that fact.

If someone can define the 'average Litster' please be my guest but I'd rather keep our differences and learn more then be the same or average.

How about we use this thread to discuss issues in our lives that bother us or we are confused about - a sort of miscellaneous or general issue thread. A place to share experiences on many topics. We might learn something new, consider something new and maybe make some friends.

Anyone game?

I am Cate..there a few things I would like to dicuss...but not right now as I have to attend a meeting and cant type it...

 

[Cathleen]

Twenty plus years ago my mother cut the following out of the Sunday newspaper and put it on the refrigerator, I copied it and it has been in my wallet ever since. I still like it.

No one will get out of this world alive. Resolve therefore to maintain a reasonable sense of values.

Take care of yourself. Good health is everyone's major sense of wealth. Without it, happiness is almost impossible.

Resolve to be cheerful & helpful. People will repay you in kind.

Avoid angry, abrasive persons. They are generally vengeful.

Avoid zealots. They are generally humorless.

Resolve to listen more & talk less. No one ever learns anything by talking.

Be chary of giving advice. Wise men don't need it and fools won't heed it.

Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving & tolerant of the weak & the wrong. Sometime in life you will have been all of these.

Do not equate money with success. There are many successful moneymakers who are miserable failures as human beings. What counts most about success is how a person achieves it.


Lloyd Shearer

 

[bobsgirl]

Thank you, Cate! I'm so glad you brought this up because one of my pet peeves about this place is people referring to it as a "porn board".

Adult, certainly. But there haven't been too many times I've been offended here. And if certain parts of these forums are more overtly sexual than others, well, when I 've had enough of looking at disembodied cocks and pussies, I find something else to do.

I truly look at this board, especially, as a place friends can gather to talk, visit, tease, or just pass the time.

Right now I think the big issue on my mind, since you asked, is how to keep a many-years-old marriage lively and fulfilling. What can I do to make both of us want to be married?

 

[Cathleen]

DLL, I understand I am sure there will be lots of time for 'pondering'.

BG, you my friend have come to the most wrong person for help. Thank goodness there are many thousands here that can help, it sure ain't me!

I feel similar to you about Lit being more of a community of folks, we all have different interests and it sure seems to me there is more then enough for everyone's interest. (Hell, there is a ton here I never knew about, nevermind become bored with...... there are still parts I'm too chicken to find out about!)

 

[dcraz]

Leave it to Cate...

Thank you Cate once again for trying to bring Lit back up to a higher level on so many fronts.

You are correct that people seem to want to pigeon hole every conversation and thread into the ‘porn board’ label. From where I sit, I find it unfortunate that those who ‘assume’ in advance everything is sexually related because it is a ‘porn site’ are actually few and far between. Rather, what frustrates me are the masses that seem to go out of their way to ENSURE that is the perception.

I see many threads started by individuals truly reaching out for answers, advice or guidance. On a variety of subjects many of which are of a non sexual nature. Invariably, these threads get taken over by individuals that seem bent on outdoing one another in either berating the thread starter or hijacking the threads and competing to see who can turn the thread into the most outrageously sexual distortion of the original post.

Whether this is an effort at humor or a failed attempt at impressing us all with their wit, the result is the same. It perpetuates the unfortunate stereotype of the ‘porn site’ label and worse, deprives the thread starters of the very advice or help they sought.

I am encouraged by the fact that the very nature of the site provides a certain level of anonymity that allows people to feel comfortable discussing what might otherwise be considered sensitive or embarrassing subjects. Short of having a ‘safe’ forum of moderated threads I am not sure there is an answer. Like you Cate, I try to provide fairly serious and informed responses whenever possible.

Keep up the good work Cate. I always find you and your posts to be a welcome breath of fresh air.

 

[Kissophile]

Cate, this is one of my little pet peeves as well.

Here are some stats from the Literotica home page today:

Members: 398,502, Threads: 289,315, Posts: 10,887,551.

There are currently 417 members and 127 guests on the boards. Most users ever online was 917 on 10-27-2004 at 09:41 PM.

With a population this size, it's ludicrous to think in terms of an "average Litster." In fact, our population comes from around the English-speaking world (and beyond in some brave cases) so you couldn't even say that we are a representative sample of all Americans.

It should only take someone a single evening of lurking here to see that not all the threads are steeped in sex talk. Anyone who complains, "I thought this was sex site" simply hasn't invested enough brain power or energy to find out the truth. I regularly dismiss these people as lazy, ignorant, foolish, or all of the above.

 

[My Own Way]

Great thread Cate...

I think one of my largest pet peeves when it come to lit and really life I guess is that a lot of people come here and ask for advice, but then when you give them an opinion or an answer they didn't want to hear, they get defensive and use the whole "I thought since I was on a sex board I'd meet people who were more open minded." Like we're all supposed to have the same opinions and theories....In my opinion, if you don't want to get some answers that might not concur with your feeling on the subject....then you're in the wrong place...

LOL....how's that for a rant? I'm done now....

 

[Bobmi357]

Its all a matter of perception.

Literotica is, to some, a porn board. But to many of the regulars here, I'd like to think that the main thrust of Lit is EROTICA, not porn. There is a fine difference between the two, a porn site must excite and ultimately provide, in my opinion, the orgasm. Lit excites, but isn't into providing that final step.

The problem is that lit has fuzzed the boundaries even more by providing places to find cybering partners (like the playground) and a place for people to post their own personal porn (the am pic section). If lits sole purpose was porn, I would have been pm'd by someone looking to cyber a long long time ago. Since I've joined Lit, not once has such a pm arrived in my pmbox (much to my disappointment ). If lit were truly a porn board, I'd be pm'ing the likes of you Bobsgirl, or Erika, or Cathleen and asking for cybersex. But its not, thank goodness. And while I'll add that all of you are great ladies, cybering isn't the main thrust of lit. Its not why you're here, and not why I'm here.

I think to some extent you can generalize a bit and profile the average litster. The average litster tends to be a bit more open minded, a bit more sexual in nature. The average litster probably ISN'T a republican or in any way conservative. The average litster may not be politically active, but is very concerned about personal freedoms. And thats about all you can say about an "average" litster. Outside of that, they come from every profession, every country, they are tall, short, skinny and fat. They are black and white, and every shade inbetween.

Since its a perception problem, its very easy to see why people would come here posting questions and get mad when they get flamed for their post. They look at lit and think Porn, while most of us look at lit and see the community and the concept of erotica. So the new poster comes to lit and gets pissed off because people deride their posting about increasing cock size. Its a stupid question and most of us have little patience for stupid questions, ESPECIALLY since the internet is loaded with answers if they'd only bother to look for them. They think that because its a "porn board" we'll welcome their little IQs into our bosom and snuggle up to their micro dick and tell them how to make willy stand tall.

Personally I do not see this problem going away anytime soon. Its a perception problem that is built fundamentally into the presentation of literotica.com. One which only Laurel or Manu can change.

For the rest of us, including you Cathleen, we have no choice but to grit our teeth and bear it. On the upside maybe one in 50 new subscribers to lit bother to stick around for more than a months time, so these annoyances usually go away.

 

[Ezzy]

"You'd think since this is a sex board..." that average Litsters would be so obvious, but you must remember that the posters at Lit represent the bell curve of normality.

There are the freaks at both ends and somewhere in the middle is the immoral majority (the average Litsters).

So there you have it, the average Litsters are situated somewhere in the middle of that bell curve, and to find them look at the number of members the numbers of posts, and the amount of sense that the posts make. All of these can be used to define the average Litster. For more information on techniques to ascertain the average ness of any Litster, please refer to the following link.

 

[Bobmi357]

Right now I think the big issue on my mind, since you asked, is how to keep a many-years-old marriage lively and fulfilling. What can I do to make both of us want to be married?

I think this would be a great stand alone thread all by itsself BG.

Marriages tend after a while to get "stale" and dealing with that is very important.

Why don't you restart this as a stand alone thread, put a little more information in it and see how it goes?

 

[jacuzzigal]

Interesting topic

This is something I've thought about a lot as well. I've been on Lit less than 6 months and find the wide variety of topics and people is part of its appeal for me. There are some I identify with more than others. Like BobMi I believe most are very open-minded. I'm interested to read more of people's opinions on this topic.

 

[dagdag]

This is sort of a rant and maybe it will become a place for all of us to learn about each other, that we are all different, that Lit. is a cross section of many societies. Being a 'Litster' does not mean we are all one way or another - we are not all consumed with sex or sexual issues twenty-four hours a day. We do not have all the answers, but there are many with good information to share from their experiences.

I'm tired of reading 'you'd think since this is a sex board.....' kind of response. Yes, we talk about sex and sexual issues, maybe more then your friend, your sibling etc. But it doesn't mean we are all sexually promiscuous, sexually foolish or even sexually liberal, being here only means we can discuss the subject of sex and issues involving sex.

We also discuss other topics too, a wide variety of topics. We can agree or disagree with each other, we can learn as well as provide information - it is called human interaction. We all think differently, personally I'm very glad for that fact.

If someone can define the 'average Litster' please be my guest but I'd rather keep our differences and learn more then be the same or average.

How about we use this thread to discuss issues in our lives that bother us or we are confused about - a sort of miscellaneous or general issue thread. A place to share experiences on many topics. We might learn something new, consider something new and maybe make some friends.

Anyone game?

Cate,

I am curious to find out what you might be confusing you. Your sense of vision and perspective makes me think that you are here to help other people. It is a heavenly thing!

At the same time, I may be wrong but you have a desire, need to be attended, caressed, kissed on your forehead and cheeks followed by a warm hug all while you are standing next to your balcony and looking far away... Not at all in a sexual way, but perhaps in a loving, caring way.

Thanks for being here angel.

 

[Xectxny19X]

Intriguing thread.

 

[Bobmi357]

Re: Re: How To Define 'The Average Literotica Member'

Cate,

I am curious to find out what you might be confusing you. Your sense of vision and perspective makes me think that you are here to help other people. It is a heavenly thing!

At the same time, I may be wrong but you have a desire, need to be attended, caressed, kissed on your forehead and cheeks followed by a warm hug all while you are standing next to your balcony and looking far away... Not at all in a sexual way, but perhaps in a loving, caring way.

Thanks for being here angel.

But that is entire Cathleen's point. Most of us are here not for the purposes of cybering, but for serious discussion, sometimes about sex, sometimes about relationships, sometimes so totally esoteric in nature that the posts belong more in the realm of metaphysics and philosphy.

I wouldn't read too much into an avatar. Most are chosen because they appeal to the owner, but do not necessarily reflect the prevailing mood of the owner. Cat's av is provocative and very alluring, but its just a picture.

Its one of the reasons why I opted for something a little more abstract. I find av's of people can be misleading in general. And I never try to read too much into the meaning of any particular avatar.

 

[Byron In Exile]

Here are some stats from the Literotica home page today:

Members: 398,502 ...

If you look at the member's list, you'll notice an interesting fact about the average Literotica member: They never post.

What that says about the rest of us, I don't know — but there it is...

 

[Kissophile]

If you look at the member's list, you'll notice an interesting fact about the average Literotica member: They never post.

What that says about the rest of us, I don't know — but there it is...

Even if one were to refine the question to consider only those who post regularly the question would be nearly pointless. The wide range of personalities, styles, and interests evident in posts in the two or three forums that I frequent tells me that the "average" Litster would be a figment of someone's imagination. And then when one takes into account that Lit has 18 different forums (plus a half dozen or so for posting in languages other than English), the absurdity of the idea that such a thing as the "average Litster" becomes patently obvious.

But, in truth, all of this is a digression from Cate's original intent since she suggested that "we use this thread to discuss issues in our lives that bother us or we are confused about - a sort of miscellaneous or general issue thread."

That said, anyone want to offer up a general topic for discussion? My mind is not up to such complicated tasks this far ahead of its first injection of coffee.

 

[Byron In Exile]

Even if one were to refine the question to consider only those who post regularly the question would be nearly pointless. The wide range of personalities, styles, and interests evident in posts in the two or three forums that I frequent tells me that the "average" Litster would be a figment of someone's imagination. And then when one takes into account that Lit has 18 different forums (plus a half dozen or so for posting in languages other than English), the absurdity of the idea that such a thing as the "average Litster" becomes patently obvious.

Of course, that can be said of an "average" anything: "average American," "average homeowner," "average Rotary Club member," "average bear" (whom Yogi is smarter than), etc. The notion only has validity statistically, and doesn't mean there isn't diversity in the sample, nor that the entire population necessarily conforms to some particular standard.

But, in truth, all of this is a digression from Cate's original intent since she suggested that "we use this thread to discuss issues in our lives that bother us or we are confused about - a sort of miscellaneous or general issue thread."

Yes, it was just an observation — I suppose you could call it an issue that bothers me. Carry on...

 

[rodstiff69]

there is nothing AVERAGE about my "member"

 

[Byron In Exile]

there is nothing AVERAGE about my "member"

Now that you've posted, welcome to our group of exceptional members!

 

[Cathleen]

I agree with you Byron, we are exceptional.

I have to say, I didn't really expect anyone to try to define an 'average' Lit member. Considering the number of registered members, I have to discount say 50% to 'alts' of existing posters and probably 25% who don't post....... who knows? There are probably only very few common elements to find a composite of what could be an average Lit member.

I had to rant about that darn phrase 'I thought since this was a porn board......'. I don't understand it because I don't expect people to be any particular way, we're all different.

Bob, I do have to tell you, I wouldn't fit into your image of an average poster. I'm not a democrat, or repuplican for that matter - I'm considered 'unenrolled' here in Massachusetts, formerly known as an independent - another term not easily defined.

But...... it was a rant I couldn't let go. Most of you know I do tend to talk more then an average person. lol

dagdag, I'm confused about most everything, well actually I'm curious about most everything would be a better description but think your words were lovely.

So now you know what was bothering me yesterday - my brain hasn't engaged enough today to be aware of what may be running around in there.

 

[Bobmi357]

Bob, I do have to tell you, I wouldn't fit into your image of an average poster. I'm not a democrat, or repuplican for that matter - I'm considered 'unenrolled' here in Massachusetts, formerly known as an independent - another term not easily defined.

Actually Cat you zeroed in on the wrong thing in my post. I said that the average lit poster probably wouldn't be a republican, but I didn't say they would be a democrat either.

For myself, I am highly embarassed to be a former republican. Their standing on so many issues and their behavior have forced me to go independant.

I'll stand by what I originally posted. I think the vast bulk of the lit posters are not conservative in anyway, and find assault on personal liberties to be offensive to them even when it doesn't directly impact them.

 

[Bobmi357]

I'll stand by what I originally posted. I think the vast bulk of the lit posters are not ......

Key phrase there. "Lit Posters".

The ones that sign up and never post a thing aren't worthy of counting in my book. Besides, this bbs system could not handle the load should say 10% of the signed up folk decided to all post at one shot.

 

[dagdag]

Re: Re: Re: How To Define 'The Average Literotica Member'

But that is entire Cathleen's point. Most of us are here not for the purposes of cybering, but for serious discussion, sometimes about sex, sometimes about relationships, sometimes so totally esoteric in nature that the posts belong more in the realm of metaphysics and philosphy.

I wouldn't read too much into an avatar. Most are chosen because they appeal to the owner, but do not necessarily reflect the prevailing mood of the owner. Cat's av is provocative and very alluring, but its just a picture.

Its one of the reasons why I opted for something a little more abstract. I find av's of people can be misleading in general. And I never try to read too much into the meaning of any particular avatar.

Points well taken.

D

 

[dagdag]

I agree with you Byron, we are exceptional.

I have to say, I didn't really expect anyone to try to define an 'average' Lit member. Considering the number of registered members, I have to discount say 50% to 'alts' of existing posters and probably 25% who don't post....... who knows? There are probably only very few common elements to find a composite of what could be an average Lit member.

I had to rant about that darn phrase 'I thought since this was a porn board......'. I don't understand it because I don't expect people to be any particular way, we're all different.

Bob, I do have to tell you, I wouldn't fit into your image of an average poster. I'm not a democrat, or repuplican for that matter - I'm considered 'unenrolled' here in Massachusetts, formerly known as an independent - another term not easily defined.

But...... it was a rant I couldn't let go. Most of you know I do tend to talk more then an average person. lol

dagdag, I'm confused about most everything, well actually I'm curious about most everything would be a better description but think your words were lovely.

So now you know what was bothering me yesterday - my brain hasn't engaged enough today to be aware of what may be running around in there.

Isn't that curiosity which differs homo-sapience from bees? It is only human to be curious. You may start worrying if your curiosity starts lessening or declining.

Curiosity and desire to know made our ancestors ask questions about the night and the stars. They called stars the back-bone of the night which avoided the night to fall unto them...

Well, since you started the thread, is there anything specific you want to share, ask about daily lives, concerns?

And thank you for your kind words.

D