How psycho would you (really!) get for the perfect person?

Primalex

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I just read about Diane Downs, who shot her three children, killing one, in an attempt to pursue a relationship with a man.

Yes, that's bad, but...it is also kind of impressive determination. She got her priorities straight.

How far would you really go to live happily ever after with the perfect partner (and if you feel you do so already, how far to keep him or her)? It counts whether done to others, done to yourself, or allowed to be done to you. There will be no consequences of your actions that can change the outcome, that you will live happily ever after with your partner, unless your own conscience gets in the way. So, where do you (not) draw the line?
 
The idea of having to harm others in order to get your "perfect" partner means that they are not your perfect partner, since they will not adapt to fit your life, eg. accept the role as a step parent.

Going psycho to make a coupling happen suggests that coupling is achieved through coercion or duress and is therefore a flawed coupling.

Saying that someone who shoots their kids over a relationship has their priorities straight is just demented.
 
The idea of having to harm others in order to get your "perfect" partner means that they are not your perfect partner

Thanks for the reminder that this is the decade where people lost their ability to read more than two sentences, because no TikTok video has that much text.

done to yourself, or allowed to be done to you

Saying that someone who shoots their kids over a relationship has their priorities straight is just demented.

There is no genius without a touch of madness.
 
Clarity of priority does not require moral nobility.

Morality, a fabric woven from compromise, shame, and inherited ideals. Priority, is the spine of your private creed, what you would bleed to keep. Morality is taught, priority is discovered.
 
Well, I bought an entire blacksmith shop's worth of tools (over 100 tongs, dozens and dozens of hammers, 2 forges, 2 post vices, 3 anvil, a swage block and a 4' mandrel) when I was finishing college as a gift (unbeknownst to him and without consultation) for my then boyfriend. Since neither of us lived anywhere at the time (early 20s and moving for work), I arranged long term (free) storage with a blacksmith not very far from the town where I acquired said equipment.
15 years later I had it transported across the country for my then husband (same man).

Obviously not illegal or dancing on the edge of immorality, but it was a pretty long stretch to go for a boyfriend long before we made promises to each other.

I would do it again in a heartbeat.
 
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I just read about Diane Downs, who shot her three children, killing one, in an attempt to pursue a relationship with a man.

Yes, that's bad, but...it is also kind of impressive determination. She got her priorities straight.

How far would you really go to live happily ever after with the perfect partner (and if you feel you do so already, how far to keep him or her)? It counts whether done to others, done to yourself, or allowed to be done to you. There will be no consequences of your actions that can change the outcome, that you will live happily ever after with your partner, unless your own conscience gets in the way. So, where do you (not) draw the line?
Oh ffs don’t romanticize that, those are - were ☹️ - real people
Sometimes love is actually acknowledging you’re not the one
 
My girlfriend fell in love with me largely while watching the loving relationship I had (and still have) with one of my grandchildren. It was my job to take him to preschool and pick him up and bring him home to his mother (who had a new baby).

She said it made her see what kind of a person I was and she wanted that person for herself.
 
Thanks for the reminder that this is the decade where people lost their ability to read more than two sentences, because no TikTok video has that much text.

done to yourself, or allowed to be done to you



There is no genius without a touch of madness.
My point stands, sociopath
 
I don’t think I would do anything very drastic, simply because I’m not a particularly take charge kind of a person and way too scaredy-cat and easily squicked out.

In past I have let my sexual boundaries be trampled on quite severely and in ways I definitely wouldn’t allow anymore, because I thought I could keep the guy that way. I’m not sure that counts for psycho, though.

One thing I have done, that felt like a completely psycho thing to do at the time, is say yes to a non-monogamous relationship. As a thought, it felt wrong and bad and just “hell no” and it went against everything I wanted and saw myself as, but I said okay because I wanted to keep the guy.

Turned out, I’m not so mono myself either and we’ve been together for 18 years now. I did struggle with the situation a lot at the beginning, though. I doubt we would have made it through the years we lived apart if not for the non-monogamy.
 
I lost my perfect person 36 years ago by being a stupid scared teenager who was afraid of commitment, and not smart enough to handle it well. My first big dream went with her, only to come back to haunt me in middle age mainly because I have run across a young woman who reminds me of her. I am working through that crap at the moment.

These days I am much too preoccupied with doing the right thing to go psycho over a relationship, and I profoundly doubt that the emotional damage is worth it. Not that doing the decent thing brings me happiness a lot of the time. In fact, I cannot even say it helps me sleep at night because I have a god-awful sleep pattern! :(
 
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Well, I bought an entire blacksmith shop's worth of tools (over 100 tongs, dozens and dozens of hammers, 2 forges, post vices, 3 anvil, a stage block and a 4' mandrel) when I was finishing college as a gift (unbeknownst to him and without consultation) for my then boyfriend.

That's wild, thanks for sharing this.
 
That's wild, thanks for sharing this.
Also... while he was quite a competent craftsman even as a young man, he had not yet done any actual forging. I came across the opportunity, and I just knew he was supposed to have it.
These days he has a stand alone purpose built smithy, forges almost every day and teaches others regularly.
 
I was going to say that I’m way too boring and staid, but then I remembered the times when I was out and about, in neighborhoods and places and at times when it really wasn’t a great idea, just to be with or even just bump into the current interest.
I’ve gone home with guys I had just met and otherwise put myself at risk, based on my ”smarts” and ”gut feeling” and am pretty well aware that hornoness negatively impacts both of those vetting tools rather badly.

No grand gestures come to mind though and I’m more prone to throwing myself, rather than someone else, under the bus.

Still, smirked rather than raged at
She got her priorities straight

so still a sociopath, I guess. Or perhaps just Gen X?
 
Christ on a cracker! That should in no way be brought to light in a positive way. How could you murder your own flesh and blood to get attention? My God, have people not heard of the word mental illness? Those poor innocent babies...and for what...because the stupid selfish piece of human garbage "thought she was inlove?" 🙄🤢🤮

I mean to be fair here...I've done my share of dumb shit for attention but to take innocent lives in the process...thats pushing the envelope. The only thing I've done was have a 3 some I didn't really wanna have...but it ended up working out in the end. Rhe girl & I are actually really good friends now and told the manipulative prick of a dude to kick rocks! 🪨 🤣
 
Also... while he was quite a competent craftsman even as a young man, he had not yet done any actual forging. I came across the opportunity, and I just knew he was supposed to have it.
These days he has a stand alone purpose built smithy, forges almost every day and teaches others regularly.
That's awesome on both parts, yours and his!
Kudos and Hat-Tip to you!
 
so still a sociopath, I guess. Or perhaps just Gen X?

I would feel bad for killing my children for my own future and recognize it as immoral action, so as far as I understand the condition, I don't qualify as sociopath.
 
I would feel bad for killing my children for my own future and recognize it as immoral action, so as far as I understand the condition, I don't qualify as sociopath.

Yes, same here.

I was being sarcastic about the diagnosing going on upthread.
 
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