How old were you....?

[Mr Blonde]

Optional reply: Would you have started younger or waited until you were older? Why?

 

[Mr Blonde]

Optional reply: Would you have started younger or waited until you were older? Why?

The important thing for me was having the right partner who shared my interests. She was the first person I had felt comfortable enough for such exploration. I think I started at about the right time, but it could have started a couple years younger or a couple of years older without much of a difference.

 

[WriterDom]

I had one experience of spanking my girlfriend when I was 17 or 18 during doggie style sex. All it did was upset her and made her cry. Didn't get involved again until 1995 when I began to seek women who liked spanking. And soon after that discovered there was such a thing as bdsm.

I don't think I'd go back. About the only thing I would change, would be the time I hit a blindfolded sub right on the forehead with a spreader bar on the first night we were together. Was an accident, and things went ok after that.

 

[lovetoread]

I was in my late 20's when I started. I would like to have started earlier.

WD, you made me giggle, did you make it up to the poor chicka?

 

[Netzach]

22 verging on 23. Started right when I should have.

 

[Quint]

I'm still 19 and here I am. Began playing with the concepts and feeling out what I wanted at about 17. I think it worked out perfectly. Perhaps a teeny part of me wishes that I could have been satisfied by nilla sex and relationships a few more years because a recurring fear is "well, what do I do if THIS gets old?" But it isn't a large concern because I'm creative, my partner is creative, we'll adjust. So I'm happy where I am.

 

[scentedpanties]

i was 16 years old and had just had my first baby. My husband and father of my child was 20 years older then me, and became my father figure, continuing the type of training my Daddy started in a different way. It continues today and has become a part of my life. Joy

 

[SexyChele]

I was 29. Hadn't really thought about being involved earlier or later. I guess it was right for me.

 

[bunny bondage]

i hit 15-19, but after thinking about it for a second, i remembered i was 14. it was with a guy who was 24. we were together for a little over a year, and he was my first real experience with bdsm (that involved another person, i'd been playing alone since i was a kid)

 

[jon.hayworth]

I voted.

My first experience was not pleasant. I got into something I did not fully know about and it did not suit my inclination. However, as I write about it (in a most circumspect manner) I realize it did allow me to find out who I was, and what my orientation was.

jon

 

[Desdemona]

I dreamed about it when I was in my teens. I had fantasies about power exchange for years. I wish I had started earlier.

 

[His_sugar]

My first actual experience was when I was about 19. I am not including all those times I talked the boys on my street into tying me up to a tree and spanking my butt when I was very young. I can still see the look on my Fathers face each time he came looking for me.. *chuckles*

Sometimes you just know things early..

 

[MissTaken]

A late bloomer

Certainly, I had had some experiences that fall into kink prior to this, but my first D/s experience was when I was 36.

If I had started earlier, I may have saved myself marrying the wrong man for me, but then, wouldn't have these two beautiful children.

No regrets.

Things happen for a reason.

 

[InnerDarkness]

was it always there?

I have had fantasies for years about power exchange (though I really didn't have a label for it then)...all my fantasies in high school involved ravishment, and I tried to get my boyfriends to be certain ways, but none of them seemed too willing.

I was probably 19 or 20 when I got my boyfriend to tie me to the bed...i think i loved it more than he did...

My husband is flat out apalled at the concept of anything BDSM (I even have these 4 little stuffed bears with leather collars that he claims he has always hated because they make him think "BDSM" when he sees them...go figure). He has learned to pull my hair and spank me enough, but he just can not direct any submission from me whatsoever.

I guess my point is that I am not sure I have really truly had the BDSM experience I desire yet...although, the possibility for it exists.

 

[Master_Vassago]

I have always been headstrong and dominant in every aspect of my life. I first experiemented with a little light bondage with a girlfriend at around 14, she was a little older than I and coaxed me into tying her up. That progressed to spanking and so on.

Then a few years later I found a true submissive, I say true because she wasn't a doormat just longed to serve in any way I commanded. Then she introduced me to a Dominatrix/Mistress she knew and I tried the other side, but I must admit I did love the pain but wouldn't submit to more than her whip.

She guided and helped Me learn more foundations and realities inside the lifestyle and how to control other aspects beside just My needs and sex. Doors were opened I would have never imagined then but now looking back wished I had found and opened them years before I did.

In the end I have enjoyed every moment since that first experience and whether I have a sub at the time or walk the path alone, I am content in knowing who I am at the moment and direct future. I only await the one to step to my side and kneel down, look up with obediant eyes and await the first command.

 

[misstoy_101]

My first experience came when I was 16 years old. A neighborhood youth found his fathers handcuffs and “cuffed” me to his bed as a gag. It turned out to be far more then a gag though. For the several hours I was there we experimented with each other. I walked into his room a virgin and I walked out with a new outlook on who I truly was and what I wanted to be. To this day neckties and cuffs decorate my head and foot posts. My children have never questioned why they are there they just think mom is insane.
No regrets with starting when I did. If I could back I would not change that afternoon.

 

[James G 5]

Define "first experience"?
I kid you not, at 7-9 years of age I would play with the 2 girls (same age bracket next door) and act out Star Trek and the old Batman show episodes with them and ALWAYS find excuses to tie then up & "torture" them...usually by tickling
Obviously I wasn't physically mature enough to experience arousal, but I felt tinglings & "funny" sensations that later became part of it....

 

[AngelicAssassin]

Optional reply: Would you have started younger or waited until you were older? Why?

i think the timing correct for my first experience.

i can't think of a much better place for experimentation than a college apartment with everyone else gone for a short 3 day holiday.

 

[snoozebutton]

Though elements of the lifestyle always interested me it was when I was 32. I was feeling under the weather and didn't feel up to sexual intercourse. I had her masterbate for me while I held her hand in my hands. I kept her eyes directly on me. I controlled the lenght of time and intensity of her orgasmn. She had never had anyone watch her masterbate before and at first was a struggle till I kept her eyes focused on me. I allowed her to release and not feel ashamed. I'll never forget that look of satifaction she had afterward.

 

[DisGirlisNutz]

I was introduced to BDsm after my divorce.... I was 31.
If I only knew then what I know now.....

 

[Croctden]

20

I was just hanging out with a girl at college and the next thing I knew she was over my knee. I don't know why, it seemed natural. She was not into it at all at was pissed afterwards. I think now I wish I had been out of college before I started.

 

[LisaFunOne1]

I'm still 19 and here I am. Began playing with the concepts and feeling out what I wanted at about 17. I think it worked out perfectly. Perhaps a teeny part of me wishes that I could have been satisfied by nilla sex and relationships a few more years because a recurring fear is "well, what do I do if THIS gets old?" But it isn't a large concern because I'm creative, my partner is creative, we'll adjust. So I'm happy where I am.

id have to agree with most of that.... rather, the part about, what if this gets old? of course there are other kinks, and you can say that if im truly a sub, itll never get old....but i dont know if id buy that....

answering the question: my first experiences were around twelve, but what was done..... was totally against my will.... i wish it hadnt happened of course... but it was later that i began looking at different parts of bdsm and going hey, that looks like fun, then trying it and saying hey, thats fantastic..... im now 19 and working my way in with the local scene.... i dont feel too young, even though theres a huge age gap... but i get along well with my...ah... elders anyway.

 

[GeronimosGirl]

young

I was 14 and my friend he was 17. Learned a lot about myself.
Now I am the Dom.
Go figure!

I wish I was older and maybe with an experienced man. Of course now that I am really older I don't think I could really be the Sub.

 

[bunny517]

how old?

Originally posted by WriterDom
I had one experience of spanking my girlfriend when I was 17 or 18 during doggie style sex. All it did was upset her and made her cry. Didn't get involved again until 1995 when I began to seek women who liked spanking. And soon after that discovered there was such a thing as bdsm.

I don't think I'd go back. About the only thing I would change, would be the time I hit a blindfolded sub right on the forehead with a spreader bar on the first night we were together. Was an accident, and things went ok after that.

My first experince with getting a spanking and loving it was at the young age of 13.It was my first but deffently not my last. I still love the feeling I get when I am about to go over the knee for a Spanking.But I did not learn about how wonderful Bondage is untill a little over a year ago.As much as I love being spanked I could never go back to just being spanked I need and want all of BDSM.

 

[Mr Blonde]

*gets out his calculator*

Assuming middle values and "13" for the youngest category, the average age is about 23 years old.

Some people wished they started sooner but a couple wished they had started later (bad/non-consensual experience).

I did not expect so many people to have started with BDSM before they turned 15. (The average age of Americans losing their virginity is typically about 15-16 for the boys and 16-17 for the girls. I think those numbers are fairly accurate, someone correct me if there is better information.) I think it is fine for people to start whenever they feel ready, and if that means starting at a young age then good for them.