How Long Do You Wait Before You Reveal Your True Perverted Self?

[tristantrotsky]

I can relate. Told my SO some things that ended up turning her off. On my scale, they were prtty mild, so I didn't go further.

Sharing is a gift to both give and be received.
There must be a two-way openness...

 

[tristantrotsky]

I told my ex husband I liked pee and his reaction was basically "EW!" so never told him any more.

Your ex-husband should have been delighted.
I would have been.

 

[Handeguy]

Sharing is a gift to both give and be received.
There must be a two-way openness...

I don't mind respecting her boundaries. Putting myself in her shoes, I can understand. Sex should be, first and foremost, pleasurable for all involved. If it makes her uncomfortable, then I'm not going to be at peak enjoyment myself. It's still plenty enjoyable where she is willing to go!

 

[Lorack]

ya test the waters a bit before you go too deep.

 

[jaF0]

Putting myself in her shoes,

Well, if you have the same size feet and don't ruin them ....

 

[Trouble_maker]

If we met here on lit, there’s no need. All or I should say most of my kinks are in my bio. If we’re talking outside of lit, I kind of put them on the table fairly early on before things get too seriously.

 

[Escierto]

I first encountered my girlfriend on a dating site for transgender women. Her profile was captioned “Active for Passive”. So pretty much from the get go, I knew that she was going to be the top and myself the bottom in our sexual relationship.

 

[SmokingFap]

I first encountered my girlfriend on a dating site for transgender women. Her profile was captioned “Active for Passive”. So pretty much from the get go, I knew that she was going to be the top and myself the bottom in our sexual relationship.

Did you have any other dark fetishes or fantasies that you had to tell her about or still haven't?

 

[Escierto]

Did you have any other dark fetishes or fantasies that you had to tell her about or still haven't?

Actually she had a fantasy of spit roasting me with another trans friend of hers which she told me about before we met in person. After we met, she said that fantasy was going to have to wait.

Recently she told me about a fantasy she had of fucking me on camera on a cam site. We are still mulling that one over.

 

[Inthelastrow]

Like some of the advice above, I think you have to judge timing for yourself dependsing on the person. I say get to know them first, but be honest. I was in a relationship with a very adventurous and kinky woman a few years back but both of us didn't know the other's "likes". It wasn't until we had gone to bed a few times, when we began to talk dirty, that we started to reveal our desires. After that it was like a flood. Another GF was not adventurous at all. I tested the waters with some mild joking, like tying her up, but her "ewe" ended any further revelations.

 

[Cupcakess]

Hi all! I'm just curious how long you have to know/date someone, in real life, before you're comfortable sharing your deepest, darkest memories, fetishes, and fantasies. ALL of them. Are you always brazen and straightforward, putting all your perverted cards on the table to start with? Or does it take you weeks, months, or even years to fully bare your twisted soul? I know many, if not most of you out there, are married or are in long-term commitments, so how long did it take before you revealed your final form? Or have you never come completely clean with your spouse/partner, and that's why you love Lit?

Looking forward to all answers. As always, have a horny day!

My husband might be the only person to know the actual whole truth and story about my entire sex life. I think a lot of that stems from us being sexually open and swinging so things need to be very truthful for that to work in my opinion. When it comes to connections outside of my marriage it's all a matter of feeling things and people out to see what is revealed and what stays hidden.

 

[SmokingFap]

My husband might be the only person to know the actual whole truth and story about my entire sex life. I think a lot of that stems from us being sexually open and swinging so things need to be very truthful for that to work in my opinion. When it comes to connections outside of my marriage it's all a matter of feeling things and people out to see what is revealed and what stays hidden.

I see that you're brand new here. Welcome to Lit! I'm sure we'll all try our best to not corrupt you too quickly...

 

[Cupcakess]

I see that you're brand new here. Welcome to Lit! I'm sure we'll all try our best to not corrupt you too quickly...

Thank you for the warm welcome! My mind is already plenty corrupt so no worries there lol.

 

[dodgeboy2]

Hi all! I'm just curious how long you have to know/date someone, in real life, before you're comfortable sharing your deepest, darkest memories, fetishes, and fantasies. ALL of them. Are you always brazen and straightforward, putting all your perverted cards on the table to start with? Or does it take you weeks, months, or even years to fully bare your twisted soul? I know many, if not most of you out there, are married or are in long-term commitments, so how long did it take before you revealed your final form? Or have you never come completely clean with your spouse/partner, and that's why you love Lit?

Looking forward to all answers. As always, have a horny day!

I know myself I have only told my wife of the things I knew she could handle, other things she has never or will never know. The reason for this is in her upbringing, she is a beautiful soul but had been brought up a very strict Southern Baptist Christian, nothing against her religion however when it comes to some things an also very unyielding one. My wife does know of all my straight relationships, however my early years thinking myself gay and the years that followed when I came to the realization I was bi she does not know about, I have been a faithful husband since and lit is where I might live out my fantasies always returning to knowledge I will never live them out for real anymore. I do love her and would never stray but my imagination needs it's avenues of release.

 

[SmokingFap]

I know myself I have only told my wife of the things I knew she could handle, other things she has never or will never know. The reason for this is in her upbringing, she is a beautiful soul but had been brought up a very strict Southern Baptist Christian, nothing against her religion however when it comes to some things an also very unyielding one. My wife does know of all my straight relationships, however my early years thinking myself gay and the years that followed when I came to the realization I was bi she does not know about, I have been a faithful husband since and lit is where I might live out my fantasies always returning to knowledge I will never live them out for real anymore. I do love her and would never stray but my imagination needs it's avenues of release.

What a fantastic response. Thank you for sharing your experience in philosophy with everyone.

 

[Happyface42]

Your ex-husband should have been delighted.
I would have been.

So would I !

 

[Happyface42]

I told my SO about most of my 'kinks' early on . She just calls me weird

 

[K0fcali]

Hi all! I'm just curious how long you have to know/date someone, in real life, before you're comfortable sharing your deepest, darkest memories, fetishes, and fantasies. ALL of them. Are you always brazen and straightforward, putting all your perverted cards on the table to start with? Or does it take you weeks, months, or even years to fully bare your twisted soul? I know many, if not most of you out there, are married or are in long-term commitments, so how long did it take before you revealed your final form? Or have you never come completely clean with your spouse/partner, and that's why you love Lit?

Looking forward to all answers. As always, have a horny day!

never reveal too much personal info too fast upon meeting someone. You will only set yourself up to become a victim of abuse. anyone interested can learn about you organically overtime.

 

[Wag_that_tail86]

Sometimes we have to allow our partners time to adjust. My wife has come to accept aspects of my sexuality that I've opened up about in recent years, but that may not have been possible ten or twenty years ago. A relationship is not a one-way street, and another person's reaction may be rooted in their upbringing or even their own (possibly negative) sexual experiences. Like anything in life regarding human emotions and desires, it's complicated, and requires patience and compassion. The good news is relationships can and do evolve.

 

[Sunnyade]

Only 2 people know my true perverted self. My female best friend who I've been sexually active with for 30 years and my Gay FWB. He revealed himself as a pervert early on in our relationship.

 

[screwher]

Too long. Like well over twenty years too long.

About four years into our relationship, my wife first cheated.I was pissed and it almost ruined us. But we kept it together and moved forward. My wife wouldn’t even look at another man apart from family and work. But as for me, shortly after her tryst I started to become aroused that another man fucked her! I started fantasizing and masturbating about other men screwing her. But obviously I couldn’t share my feelings with my wife.

Now we are a hotwife couple. But I wish I handled things differently back then. And started our lifestyle back then. All those years we could’ve spent having other men screwing her!

 

[cdstefi]

Actually she had a fantasy of spit roasting me with another trans friend of hers which she told me about before we met in person. After we met, she said that fantasy was going to have to wait.

Recently she told me about a fantasy she had of fucking me on camera on a cam site. We are still mulling that one over.

I'd watch that

 

[tonyreid]

I met my wife on Lit we told each other all sorts of secrets thinking we would never meet in person . 15 years later still together loving life

 

[TanyaDeVayer]

I shared my fantasy with my boyfriend after six month or so. He is okay with it, but not to crazy about it either.
All in all it doesn't have an effect on us at all.

 

[Twistedkink]

Wife has demonstrated that she could never handle knowing my true deep dark desires. Sadly she will never know me as intimately as I would want her to.