Hello From My Englishness

No problem.... Tea's made, cosy' son, help yourself!

Off to see if my sanity can remain in-tact for another day; some days it's a constant struggle ignoring the fools.

I would say 'i pity the fool' but I really don't. I had one the other day in work. Proud to tell me that they've just done THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF WHAT EVERYONE ELSE WOULD DO,. And then be surprised at me reacting with puzzled look.

Last week the reaction was mumbling under the breath... When I corrected their stupidity (which I did politely) when anyone else would have torn them a new arse hole!

I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I'm not a moron... Arrrggghhh!
 
I would say 'i pity the fool' but I really don't. I had one the other day in work. Proud to tell me that they've just done THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF WHAT EVERYONE ELSE WOULD DO,. And then be surprised at me reacting with puzzled look.

Last week the reaction was mumbling under the breath... When I corrected their stupidity (which I did politely) when anyone else would have torn them a new arse hole!

I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I'm not a moron... Arrrggghhh!

Diew Bach, true as I'm standing by here, if I didn't know you better I'd say you're a feckin saint
 
Has everyone stocked up on toilet roll, tea bags, hand sanitiser, bread, and copies of the Daily Fail (used solely as emergency loo roll)

I’ve heard someone’s working on HeinekenVirus as well.
 
Has everyone stocked up on toilet roll, tea bags, hand sanitiser, bread, and copies of the Daily Fail (used solely as emergency loo roll)

I’ve heard someone’s working on HeinekenVirus as well.

Whisky. Did a stock check a week or so ago.




(Fyi, bread goes off)(but in a proper emergency, you're meant to fill your bath with cold water... That way you'll have weeks of rationed water to drink when the water man doesn't turn up to work and the taps run dry... I'm a veritable public information point today!)
 
Whisky. Did a stock check a week or so ago.




(Fyi, bread goes off)(but in a proper emergency, you're meant to fill your bath with cold water... That way you'll have weeks of rationed water to drink when the water man doesn't turn up to work and the taps run dry... I'm a veritable public information point today!)

In lunnun there's been a run on pasta, calpol
 
Has everyone stocked up on toilet roll, tea bags, hand sanitiser, bread, and copies of the Daily Fail (used solely as emergency loo roll)

I’ve heard someone’s working on HeinekenVirus as well.

We had the misfortune of going to Costco yesterday and it was surreal on the loo paper front lol. So crazy we took photos :D:D
 
We had the misfortune of going to Costco yesterday and it was surreal on the loo paper front lol. So crazy we took photos :D:D

Surreal in what sense? Costco itself is a strange place to shop; HUGE things of everything!

I ordered anti-bac wipes on shopping from Asda (delivery came yesterday, order placed Monday) and they’d sold out. It’s going to get crazy out there.

Has anyone seen the cartoon of the Brexit stockpile now becoming the Coronavirus stockpile?
 
We had the misfortune of going to Costco yesterday and it was surreal on the loo paper front lol. So crazy we took photos :D:D

I have taken the path of least resistance and stocked up on nothing. So if I do have to isolate I will be getting a lot of takeaway and asking them to leave it on the doorstep. Actually not too sure if that is the best way to do it lol..
 
Surreal in what sense? Costco itself is a strange place to shop; HUGE things of everything!

I ordered anti-bac wipes on shopping from Asda (delivery came yesterday, order placed Monday) and they’d sold out. It’s going to get crazy out there.

Has anyone seen the cartoon of the Brexit stockpile now becoming the Coronavirus stockpile?

We were heading through the store and saw what looked like a huge crowd all staring in the same direction at nothing. We did our normal shop and they were still there staring at nothing. They'd been waiting for a delivery of loo rolls lol.
The staff started to bring out their huge pallets of stock, each pack has 40 loo rolls in and the pallets were easily 8' high, customers flung themselves onto the pallets and were frantically knocking them off into their trolleys. The staff really had no clue what to do, they were emptied in seconds. We'd gone to the tills and when we looked behind us we couldn't see people just trolleys stacked 2 or 3 times their normal capacity with loo rolls. :D It was like something out of a crazy film. With 40 in each pack they had enough to last them a year :D
 
I have taken the path of least resistance and stocked up on nothing. So if I do have to isolate I will be getting a lot of takeaway and asking them to leave it on the doorstep. Actually not too sure if that is the best way to do it lol..

Will we have to paint crosses on our doors with undertakers roaming the streets in pick up trucks?
 
We were heading through the store and saw what looked like a huge crowd all staring in the same direction at nothing. We did our normal shop and they were still there staring at nothing. They'd been waiting for a delivery of loo rolls lol.
The staff started to bring out their huge pallets of stock, each pack has 40 loo rolls in and the pallets were easily 8' high, customers flung themselves onto the pallets and were frantically knocking them off into their trolleys. The staff really had no clue what to do, they were emptied in seconds. We'd gone to the tills and when we looked behind us we couldn't see people just trolleys stacked 2 or 3 times their normal capacity with loo rolls. :D It was like something out of a crazy film. With 40 in each pack they had enough to last them a year :D

Ah! The crazed mentality! Bless. I guess they all wanted patriotic toilet roll.
 
We were heading through the store and saw what looked like a huge crowd all staring in the same direction at nothing. We did our normal shop and they were still there staring at nothing. They'd been waiting for a delivery of loo rolls lol.
The staff started to bring out their huge pallets of stock, each pack has 40 loo rolls in and the pallets were easily 8' high, customers flung themselves onto the pallets and were frantically knocking them off into their trolleys. The staff really had no clue what to do, they were emptied in seconds. We'd gone to the tills and when we looked behind us we couldn't see people just trolleys stacked 2 or 3 times their normal capacity with loo rolls. :D It was like something out of a crazy film. With 40 in each pack they had enough to last them a year :D

Have I missed something? Does Coronavirus affect the bowels? Or are people buying it because it's cheaper than buying tissues?
 
I have taken the path of least resistance and stocked up on nothing. So if I do have to isolate I will be getting a lot of takeaway and asking them to leave it on the doorstep. Actually not too sure if that is the best way to do it lol..

Please tell me you'll be ordering Chinese?
 
Have I missed something? Does Coronavirus affect the bowels? Or are people buying it because it's cheaper than buying tissues?

You've missed nothing. It's a self fulfilling prophecy. Look there's panic buying/fomo/ they'll be nothing left.... I must buy lots of (loo roll and pasta for some reason) hence there's then empty shelves. A photo gets taken and lo n behold... We have panic buying.

Same thing happens in the run up to Christmas... I panic buy balsamic vinegar and parmesan cheese! One must keep up ones standards!
 
I’ve just counted and I have about 12 loo rolls at home, purchased in a non panic state. Three people in our house.... should I start rationing?

On the pasta front I don’t know because they’re all in a cupboard that’s awkward to get to and I can’t be arsed to get on my knees and look... I definitely have some Taste the Difference Orzo. ( ohhh if only I had some truffle oil ). I do have a shed load of flour though and an unused pasta maker still in the box 10 years after the wedding. Seems a perfect time to break it open.
 
I’ve just counted and I have about 12 loo rolls at home, purchased in a non panic state. Three people in our house.... should I start rationing?

On the pasta front I don’t know because they’re all in a cupboard that’s awkward to get to and I can’t be arsed to get on my knees and look... I definitely have some Taste the Difference Orzo. ( ohhh if only I had some truffle oil ). I do have a shed load of flour though and an unused pasta maker still in the box 10 years after the wedding. Seems a perfect time to break it open.

I just posted a 70p packet of fusilli to my daughter ,£3.70 first class, the grandkids will starve otherwise. Loo rolls will have to be FedEx should they be bubble wrapped?. the postmaster is a miserable sod I refuse to give him more business than absolutely necessary.
 
Just stocked up on various gins and Laphroaig, if I'm gonna die of the sniffles I'm going to go happy :)
 
I just posted a 70p packet of fusilli to my daughter ,£3.70 first class, the grandkids will starve otherwise. Loo rolls will have to be FedEx should they be bubble wrapped?. the postmaster is a miserable sod I refuse to give him more business than absolutely necessary.

I see a problem.
These days they want to know what's in the packet.
You declare loo rolls and you'll never see them again!
 
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