Have you ever built a wall? How difficult was it to be brought down?

[skitch]

an emotional wall is what I'm referring to. I've finally found someone that I think i could truly love and have no doubts about, but I have this wall that is preventing me from opening up. It's like everything is ok and fine and I'm almost expecting something bad to happen so that it won't effect me. Anyone else had experiences like that? What does it take to at least lower the bridge a little?

 

[Devilish1]

Take things slow. Dont rush things. One day at a time.

if that doesnt work, write down why you think you have a wll built up.

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

Time.

Time and patience between you two. The walls really suck, and even though you might lose your footing along the way, you can regain solid ground again.

Communication does wonders also. Talking things out and voicing your concerns does wonders.

 

[curious2c]

I think I may be in the process of building one right now. I will let you know when I find out if and when it ever comes down.

 

[Guest]

Wall?

I was told i had a defense sheild like the starship enterprise. I was told that after two weeks no one knew anything about me except my name. (corrected to say as i did not go through any kind of withdrawal i wasn't on drugs.)

This was at the end of my second week of six in the "Lifecare unit" of one of our local hospitals.

Yes, I had a wall up at one time. I still have some trouble even to this day if i don't watch myself.

How does a wall get there and what do you do about it?

That is a very large question with many answers.

I think the problem boils down to a matter of trust.

Trust can be a matter of how much one feels they have to lose. I would like to say that you did not get this way overnight and will not get better overnight either. If you seem to do that the chances are you will go to far in the other direction. This is called all or nothing.

I am assuming that you have learned how to trust to start with. You my not have.

What i'm trying to say here is that who ever this is some professional help might be in order as well as some self-help groups as they are bound to be some other problems that you don't know about yet. Also there are many books and tapes on this and a host of subjects.

You are not alone.

 

[fgarvb1]

That was me. I was timed out again.

Also expecting something else to happen all the time is called "waiting for the other shoe to drop."

 

[weed]

Time....and one little chip at a time. When the wall comes up and the thoughts you want to share that seem stuck in your head unable to come out gag yourself and puke them up anyway....it may lead to emotional upheaval or it may be easier than you thought but either way at least you got something out beyond the wall....you break the ice....then take a break and recover before you spew your next thought that sits and festers behind the wall. Keep doing it....especially when you're feeling strong and eventually it gets easier. And you get stronger. But take your time....

just my opinion

(i'm going to go back behind my wall now)

 

[ksmybuttons]

Walls have their uses. Don't take it down. Find a way around it or cut a door. The reason for the wall will always be there, you just want to be able to get to the other side.