Grease is the word

[Lovepotion69]

Sorry folks, I'm a fan of musicals.

Post your fave lyrics from musicals (now why do I think there will be a lot of Chicago ones posted )

Grease is the word
I saw my problems and I'll see the light
We got a lovin' thing, we gotta feed it right
There ain't no danger we can go too far
We start believin' now that we can be who we are - grease is the word

They think our love is just a growin' pain
Why don't they understand? It's just a cryin' shame
Their lips are lyin', only real is real
We stop the fight right now, we got to be what we feel - grease is theword

Chorus:
(Grease is the word, is the word that you heard)
It's got a groove, it's got a meaning
Grease is the time, is the place, is the motion
Grease is the way we are feeling

We take the pressure, and we throw away conventionality, belongs toyesterday
There is a chance that we can make it so far
We start believin' now that we can be who we are - grease is the word

chorus

This is a life of illusion, a life of control
Mixed with confusion - what're we doin' here?

We take the pressure, and we throw away conventionality, belongs toyesterday
There is a chance that we can make it so far
We start believin' now that we can be who we are - grease is the word

 

[Lovepotion69]

Look at me, I'm Sandra Dee

Look at me, I'm Sandra Dee, lousy with virginity
Won't go to bed till I'm legally wed, I can't, I'm Sandra Dee
Watch it, hey, I'm Doris Day, I was not brought up that way
Won't come across, even Rock Hudson lost his heart to Doris Day

I don't drink or swear, I won't white my hair, I get ill from onecigarette
Keep your filthy paws off my silky drawers.
Would you pull that crap with Annette?

As for you, Troy Donahue, I know what you wanna do
You got your crust, I'm no object of lust, I'm just plain Sandra Dee
Elvis, Elvis, let me be, keep that pelvis far from me
Just keep your cool, now you're starting to drool
Hey, fungu, I'm Sandra Dee

 

[phrodeau]

"Grease Is the Word" was written for the motion picture, and is not part of the musical.

So in that spirit, I submit a song that also was written only for the motion picture version of a musical, "Mein Herr" from Cabaret, by Kander and Ebb:

You have to understand the way I am, Mein Herr
A tiger is a tiger, not a lamb, Mein Herr
You'll never turn the vinegar to jam, Mein Herr
So I do...
What I do...
When I'm through...
Then I'm through...
And I'm through...
Toodle-oo!

Bye-Bye, Mein Lieber Herr
Farewell, Mein Lieber Herr
It was a fine affair
But now it's over
And though I used to care
I need the open air
You're better off without me, Mein Herr

Don't dab your eye, Mein Herr
Or wonder why, Mein Herr
I've always told you I was a rover
You mustn't knit your brow
You should have known by now
You'd every cause to doubt me, Mein Herr

The continent of Europe is so wide, Mein Herr
Not only up and down, but side to side, Mein Herr
I couldn't ever cross it if I tried, Mein Herr
So I do...
What I can...
Inch by inch...
Step by step...
Mile by mile...
Man by man.

Bye-Bye, Mein Lieber Herr
Farewell, Mein Lieber Herr
It was a fine affair
But now it's over
And though I used to care
I need the open air
You're better off without me, Mein Herr

Don't dab your eye, Mein Herr
Or wonder why, Mein Herr
I've always told you I was a rover
You mustn't knit your brow
You should have known by now
You'd every cause to doubt me, Mein Herr
Auf wiedersehen... Bye bye Mein Herr!

 

[TygerEyez]

From Rent

Take me or Leave me


Every single day I walk down the street
I hear people say, "baby, so sweet!"
Ever since puberty
Everybody stares at me
Boys, girls, I can't help it, baby

So be kind, but don't lose your mind
Just remember that I'm your baby

Take me for what I am
Who I was meant to be
And if you give a damn
Take me baby, or leave me
Take me baby or leave me

A tiger in a cage can never see the sun
This diva needs her stage
Baby, let's have fun
You are the one I choose, folks would kill to fill your shoes
You'll love the limelight too, now baby

So be mine, but don't waste my time
Prayin' "Oh, honey-bear, are you still my-my-my baby"

Take me for what I am
Who I was meant to be
And if you give a damn
Take me baby or leave me

No way can I be what I'm not
But hey, don't you want your girl hot?
Don't fight, don't lose your head
'Coz every night, who's in your bed?
Who?... Who's in your bed? (Kiss Pookie)

(new singer)
It won't work: I look before I leap
I love margins and discipline
I make lists in my sleep
Baby, what's my sin
Never quit, I follow through
I hate mess but I love you
What to do with my impromptu baby

So be wise, 'coz this girl satisfies
You got a prize that won't compromise
You're one lucky baby

Take me for who I am (a control freak)
Who I was meant to be (a snob, yet over-attentive)
And if you give a damn (a lovable droll, geek!)
Take me baby or leave me (and anal retentive)

That's it, the straw that breaks my back
I quit, unless you take it back
Women, what is it about them?
Can't live, with them or without them!

Take me for what I am
Who I was meant to be
And if you give a damn
Take me baby, take me or l-l-l-l-leave me

Take me baby
Or leave me

Guess I'm leavin': I'm gone!

 

[Xstatic]

A bit of a cheat, this one...

...because it's actually a poem:

The Naming of Cats

The naming of cats is a difficult matter
It isn't just one of your holiday games
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you a cat must have three different names.

First of all, there's the name that the family use daily
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James
Such as Victor, or Jonathon; George or Bill Bailey
All of them sensible, everyday names.

There are fancier names, if you think they sound sweeter
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter
But all of them sensible, everyday names.

But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?

Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum
Names that never belong to more than one cat.

But above and beyond, there's still one name left over
And that is the name that you never will guess
The name that no human research can discover
But the cat himself knows, and will never confess.

When you notice a cat in profound meditation
The reason, I tell you, is always the same
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought... of the thought... of the thought...
Of his name.
His ineffable... effable... eff-and-ineffable
Deep, and inscrutable...
Singular... name...

 

[TygerEyez]

*gasps, then tries mutely to pick her jaw from up off the floor*

Someone else here likes CATS??????

Sweet Brigid, save me, I think I'm gonna die!

*laughs happily*

 

[Monazwx]

Hey Big Spender!!!!

From "Sweet Charity"

- Big Spender
- Hey, fellow. Can I talk to you for a second? What's the harm in a minute talk?
- Hey, good looking, I like your hair!
- Hey, mister, you got a cigarette for me, huh?
- Oh, sir, you speak French.
- Parlez vous Fraçais?
- Hey guy do you wanna danve? A little dance won't hurt ya!
- Gut do you wanna tango, it always take two for tango.
- Ooh, you're so tall!
- Let's have some fun!
- Sssssssssss...

The minute you walked in the joint,
I could see you were a man of distinction,
A real big spender,
Good looking, so refined.
Say, wouldn't you like to know
What's going on in my mind?

So, let me get right to the point,
I don't pop my cork for ev'ry guy I see.
Hey, big spender, spend...
A little time with...me...me...me!
Do you wanna have fun?
Ssssssssssss...
How's about (fun) a few laughs?
I can show you a...good time...
Do you wanna have fun..****..****?
How's about (fun) a few (fun) laughs (fun)
Laughs (fun) laughs
(I can show you a...)
(fun) laughs (fun) laughs
(good time)
Fun, laughs (good time)
Fun, laughs (good time)
Fun, laughs (good time)...Ssssssssssss...
What did you say you are?
How's about a ...(laugh)
I could give you some...
Are you ready for some...(fun)
How would you like a...
Let me show you a ...(good time)

Hey, big spender...
Hey, big spender...

The minute you walked in the joint,
I could see you were a man of distinction,
A real big spender.
Good looking, so refined.
Say wouldn't you like to know
What's going on in my mind?

So, let me get right to the point,
I don't pop my cork for every guy I see.
Hey, big spender,
Hey, big spender!
Hey, big spender!
Spend...a little time with ...me!
Fun...Laughs...Good Time!
Fun...Laughs...Good Time!
Fun...Laughs...Good Time!
How about a palsy?...Yeah!

Yeah

 

[bad kitty]

My favorite

Grease 2 - Reproduction

Music & Lyrics: Genners Wade
Vocal: Tab Hunter and Cast

Mr. Stuart:
The parts of a flower are so constructed that very, very often the wind will cause pollination.
If not, then a bee or any other nectar gathering creature can create the same situation.
Yes, anything that gets the pollen to the pistils, write it on the list.
I'll try to make it crystal-clear:
The flower's insatiable passion turns its life into a circus of debauchery!

Mr. Stuart: Now you see just how the stamen gets its lusty dust onto the stigma.
And why this frenzied chlorophyllous orgy starts in spring is no enigma!
We call this quest for satisfaction a what, class?
Sorority girls: A photo-periodic reaction!
Mr. Stuart: Oh, that's good, that's very good.
Hey, I'm lost where are we? Chapter 2, page 5...

Reproduction, reproduction!
Put your pollen tube to work.
Reproduction, reproduction!
Make my stamen go berserk.
Reproduction!
I don't think they even know what a pistil is!
I got your pistil right here...
Where does the pollen go?

Mr. Stuart: Next chapter, In an abstract way, the same thing applies
To the reproductive organs of the more complex life forms.
But now we are dealing with sexual response.
Are there any questions before we begin reading?

Is it possible the female member of some sex on a couch
Could like get this guy all hot and she never even knew it?
When a warm-blooded mammal in a tight little sweater
Starts pullin' that stuff, is she sayin' that she wants to do it?
Johnny: Can't prove it by me, cause they change their tune
When you got 'em in the back seat.
With his heart beatin' fast! Sorority girls: They make it sound like a track meet, gross!
Yeah, then all they can do is say "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!"

Reproduction, reproduction!
Baby, give it to me now.
Reproduction, reproduction!
Is that all you think about?
Reproduction!
Come on baby show me that you really love me so!
Ohhh, I think I'm gonna throw up!
Where does the pollen go?

Mr. Stuart:
The human is the only being capable of consciously controlling its number of offspring.
Any comments on this?
Paulette: Mr. Stuart, is it true that guys like you, you know, mature and all,
Carry some protection with them for sexual occasions?
Johnny: What's the big deal? Can't a girl just do that thing in a book
Where she adds up the days of her, uh, what do you call it, mentalstration?
Oh, that's really neat! Yeah, and what will the guy say when the numbers don't add up right, huh?
Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Reproduction, reproduction!
Hope he's proud of what he's done.
Reproduction, reproduction!
He was only pokin' fun.
Reproduction!
See what happens when a boy and girl
Don't know how to play it safe?

Reproduction, reproduction!
Reproduction, reproduction!
Reproduction, reproduction!
Reproduction!
Where does the pollen go?

 

[Guest]

 

[Xstatic]

*gasps, then tries mutely to pick her jaw from up off the floor*

Someone else here likes CATS??????

Absolutely - I'd be horribly embarrassed to tell you how many times I saw it

Sweet Brigid, save me, I think I'm gonna die!

*laughs happily*

It was the first ALW show I saw - and I hope it's not coming back soon, 'cause I couldn't afford to see it right now

 

[Monazwx]

Mona, I love your av!

Thanks, I have the feeling that alot of Lit. men are the guy in that pic.

 

[TygerEyez]

*laughs* No, it's not coming back anytime soon... Unfortunately for me. I never actually got to see it live.

As for embarrassing? Top this: I had to buy a second video because I actually wore mine out. I used and abused it so that the tracking could no longer keep up.

*reminds herself to watch it soon* Mmmm... Drew Varley... yummmmmm...

 

[Lovepotion69]

phrodeau, I didn't know it was specifically written for the motion picture.
I never saw Cabaret apart from in the theatre and I recognise Mein Herr.

What a waste from Miss Saigon
(A street filled with vendors in Patpong in Bangkok, outside a sleazy night-club called "Le Moulin Rouge" where the ENGINEER is doorman and barker. Other DOORMEN compete with him for the attention of crowds of TOURISTS.)

ENGINEER:
What a waste!
To pay for my keep
I'm rounding up sheep
To fleece here in Bangkok
I'm disgraced
I can't get ahead
There's nothing as dead
As peace here in Bangkok
Ten cents an hour, that's all they pay
I'll have to swim to the USA

If you're looking for fun
Original sin
If you want to put out
Then you gotta come in

Gee, isn't Bangkok really neat?
The things they're selling on the street
Fresh dog, if that's what you'd enjoy
A girl, or if you want a boy

Don't be a lump, you can hump
For a small extra fee
Hump - "humpy, humpy"
I'm depressed
For hustling amours
To Japanese tours
Is no treat in Bangkok
I'm the best
But selling these runts
For sexual stunts
Leaves me beat in Bangkok
Ten cents an hour...
...Screw the Siamese
Look how they're ripping off... refugees

If you're looking for fun
Original sin
If you want to put out
Then you gotta come in

Hey boys, don't stand around like wimps
Watch out, those guys, they're really pimps
You want some thrills, come-on and grab it!
Three girls, two gerbils, and a rabbit
Hey, that's a joke, mine blow smoke
For a small extra fee

Hey, Joe, try taking a little excursion
You'll all feel good from a little perversion
Massage requiring total immersion
Some strange positions they say are Persian

Drinks are on me
First girl is free
What can I say? You get me
For a small extra fee!

 

[TygerEyez]

oohhh.. I love Miss Saigon! It's fabulous if you see it live!

THE HEAT IS ON IN SAIGON

("Dreamland" is a club filled with American Marines,
civilians and south Vietnamese officers. The girls parade
around and get the crowd to buy raffle tickets:
the winner of the "beauty contest" will be the prize.)

AMERICANS
The heat is on in Saigon
The girls are hotter 'n' hell
One of these slits here will be Miss Saigon
God, the tension is high, not to mention the smell
The heat is on in Saigon
Is there a war going on?
Don't ask, I ain't gonna tell

(Two friends, CHRIS and JOHN, are among the Marines.
JOHN is with one of the girls)

CHRIS
How are you doin' there, John?

JOHN
Chris! I got the hots for Yvonne!
We should get drunk and get laid
Says the engineer.

CHRIS
I tell you buddy, I've had it
I don't wanna hear.

ENGINEER, CHRIS AND JOHN
The heat is on in Saigon

JOHN
But 'til they tell us we're gone
I'm gonna buy you a girl

CHRIS
You can buy me a beer

(The girls leave the men and move onto the stage)

MIMI
See my bikini, it's just the right size

YVETTE
Don't you enjoy how it rides up my thighs?
Look from behind, it'll knock out your eyes

YVONNE
I'll show you: my special trophy of war

MIMI
For a Marine, I'll show more

AMERICANS
You won't get up off the floor
The heat is on in Saigon
Don't tell me I'm reassigned, all that chickenshit sucks
Tonight I'm out of my mind, not to mention ten bucks

GIGI
If I'm your pin-up, I'll melt all your brass
Stuck on your wall, with a pin in my ass
If you get me, you will travel first class
I'll show you, we will make magic, chéri

ENGINEER
You buy more tickets from me
The winner gets her for free

CHRIS
The meat is cheap in Saigon
I used to love getting stoned, waking up with some whore
I don't know why I went dead, it's not fun anymore

KIM
I'm seventeen, and I'm new here today
The village I come from seems so far away
All of the girls know much more what to say
But I know
I have a heart like the sea
A million dreams are in me

CHRIS
Good Jesus, John, who is she?

AMERICANS (AND CROWD)
The Cong is tight'ning the noose
Is it a week or a day or an hour that we got?
Tonight could be our last shot got to put it to use

(The GIRLS come off the stage and mingle with the men.)

ALL, INCLUDING GIRLS
Tonight I bet that you and I will get along
Forget about the threat, forget the Viet-Cong

ALL MEN
Mimi, Gigi, Yvette or Yvonne
Gonna buy me a beer, and elect Miss Saigon

(The ENGINEER holds the election by holding his hand over
each girl's head for applause. When KIM is judged, CHRIS
claps loudly, which makes her notice him.)

ENGINEER
Yvonne, Yvette, Mimi, Kim, Gigi

(GIGI wins)

ENGINEER
Attention, s'il vous plait!
By popular demand
Miss Gigi Van Tranh
Is elected Miss Saigon!

(The ENGINEER puts a cheap tiara on GIGI and a ribbon which says "Miss Saigon".)

AMERICANS
The heat is on in Saigon
And things are not going well
But still at midnight, the party goes on
A good-bye party in hell

ENGINEER
And now who wins this pussycat?

(The ENGINEER holds a bowl; GIGI picks up a ticket.)

GIGI
Number 66!

 

[Monazwx]

A Hymn to Him

From "My Fair Lady"

Always good for laughs

Henry
Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
Eternally noble, historically fair;
Who when you win will always give your back a pat.
Why can’t a woman be like that?
Why does ev’ryone do what the others do?
Can’t a woman learn to use her head?
Why do they do everything their mothers do?
Why don’t they grow up like their father instead?
Why can’t a woman take after a man?
Men are so pleasant, so easy to please;
Whenever you’re with them, you’re always at ease.
Would you be slighted if I didn’t speak for hours?

Pickering
Of course not.

Henry
Would you be livid if I had a drink or two?

Pickering
Nonsense.

Henry
Would you be wounded if I never sent you flowers?

Pickering
Never.

Henry
Why can’t a woman be like you?
One man in a million may shout a bit.
Now and then there’s one with slight defects.
One perhaps whose truthfulness you doubt a bit.
But by and large we are a marvelous sex!
Why can’t a woman behave like a man?
Men are so friendly, good-natured and kind;
A better companion you never will find.
If I were hours late for dinner would you bellow?

Pickering
Of course not.

Henry
If I forgot your silly birthday, would you fuss?

Pickering
Nonsense.

Henry
Would you complain if I took out another fellow?

Pickering
Never.

Henry
Why can’t a woman be like us?
Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
Men are so decent, such regular chaps.
Ready to help you through any mishaps.
Ready to buck you up whenever you up whenever you are glum.
Why can’t a woman be a chum?
Why is thinking something women never do?
Why is logic never even tried?
Straightening up their hair is all they ever do.
Why don’t they straighten up the mess that’s inside?
Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
If I were a woman who’d been to a ball,
Been hailed as a princess to one and to all;
Would I start weeping like a bathtub overflowing?
Carry on as if my home were in a tree?
Would I run off and never tell me where I’m going?
Why can’t a woman be like me?

 

[Monazwx]

A Personal Favourite

*humming I'm getting married in the morning*

Get me to the church on time My fair lady

Jamie, Harry, Friends
There’s just a few more hours.
That’s all the time you’ve got.
A few more hours
Before they tie the knot.

Doolittle
There are drinks and girls all over London, and I’ve
gotta track ‘em down in just a few more hours!
I’m getting married in the morning!
Ding dong! The bells are gonna chime.
Pull out the stopper!
Let’s have a whopper!
But get me to the church on time!
I gotta be there in the mornin’
Spruced up and lookin’ in me prime.
Girls, come and kiss me;
Show how you’ll miss me.
But get me to the church on time!
If I am dancin’
Roll up the floor.
If I am whistlin’
Whewt me out the door!
For I’m gettin’ married in the mornin’
Ding dong! the bells are gonna chime.
Kick up an rumpus
But don’t lost the compass;
And get me to the church,
Get me to the church,
For Gawd’s sake, get me to the church on time!

Doolittle and Everyone
I’m getting married in the morning
Ding dong! the bells are gonna chime.

Doolittle
Drug me or jail me,
Stamp me and mail me.

All
But get me to the church on time!
I gotta be there in the morning
Spruced up and lookin’ in me prime.

Doolittle
Some bloke who’s able
Lift up the table,

All
And get em to the church on time!

Doolittle
If I am flying
Then shoot me down.
If I am wooin’,
Get her out of town!

All
For I’m getting married in the morning!
Ding dong! the bells are gonna chime.

Doolittle
Feather and tar me;
Call out the Army;
But get me to the church.

All
Get me to the church...

Doolittle
For Gawd’s sake, get me to the church on time!

Harry and Everyone
Starlight is reelin’ home to bed now.
Mornin’ is smearin’ up the sky.
London is wakin’.
Daylight is breakin’.
Good luck, old chum,
Good health, goodbye.

Doolittle
I’m gettin’ married in the mornin’
Ding dong! the bells are gonna chime...
Hail and salute me
Then haul off and boot me...
And get me to the church,
Get me to the church...
For Gawd’s sake, get me to the church on time!

 

[J.B.]

*sigh*

There are worse things I could do, than go with a boy or two
Even though the neighborhood thinks I'm trashy and no good
I suppose it could be true, but there are worse things I could do

I could flirt with all the guys, smile at them and bat my eyes
Press against them when we dance, make them think they stand a chance
Then refuse to see it through, that's a thing I'd never do

I could stay home every night, wait around for mr. Right
Take cold showers every day, and throw my life away
On a dream that won't come true

I could hurt someone like me, out of spite or jealousy
I don't steal and I don't lie, but I can feel and I can cry
A fact I'll bet you never knew
But to cry in front of you, that's the worst thing I could do

 

[J.B.]

Freddy my love, I miss you more than words can say
Freddy my love, please keep in touch while you're away
Hearing from you can make the day so much better
I really flipped over the great cashmere sweater
Freddy my love, Freddy my love, Freddy my love

Freddy you know, your absense makes me feel so blue
That's okay though, your presents make me think of you
Mama will have a heart-attack when she catches
Those little bushes with the black leather patches
Oh how I wish I had a jacket that matches, Freddy my love
Freddy my love, Freddy my love, Freddy my love

Don't keep your letters from me, I quilt to every line
Your spelling's kinda crummy, but honey so is mine
I treasure every gifty, the ring is really nifty
You say it cost you fifty, so you're drifty, I don't mind

Whoa - Freddy you see, you'll hold me in your arms someday (Freddy mylove)
And I will be wearing your lacy lingerie (Freddy I'm yours)
Thinking about it, my heart's pounding already
Knowing when you come home, we're bound to go steady
And through your service pay around my confetti, Freddy my love

Freddy my love, Freddy my love, Freddy my love - ooh Freddy
Freddy my love, Freddy my love, Freddy my love - ooh Freddy
Freddy my love, Freddy my love, Freddy my love - I'm ready
Freddy my love, Freddy my love, Freddy my love - ooh Freddy
Freddy my love, Freddy my love, Freddy my love...
(to fade)

 

[Lovepotion69]

TygerEyez, Miss Saigon was the first ever musical I saw in London. I loved it! Les Miserables is really good too. I think I prefer the authors/producers for these better than Sir Webber.

Bad Kitty, oh yes Grease2. I liked the Reproduction and Cool Rider.

 

[Lovepotion69]

Empty at empty tables - Les Miserables

There´s a grief that can´t be spoken
There´s a pain goes on and on
Empty chairs at empty tablesNow my friends are dead and gone.

Here they talked of revolution
Here it was they lit the flame
Here they sang about tomorrow
And tomorrow never came

>From the table in the corner
They could see a world reborn
And they rose with voices ringing
I can hear them now
The very words that they had sungt
Became their last communion
On the lonely barricade at dawn

Oh my friends, my friends, forgive me
That I live and you are gone
There´s a grief that can´t be spoken
There´s a pain goes on and on

Phantom faces at the window
Phantom shadows on the floor
Empty chairs at empty tables
Where my friends will meet no more
Oh my friends, my friends, don´t ask me
What your sacrifice was for.
Empty chairs at empty tables,Where my friends will sing no more

 

[Lovepotion69]

Master of the hous - Les Miserables

THENARDIER
Welcome, M'sieur
Sit yourself down
And meet the best
Innkeeper in town
As for the rest,
All of 'em crooks
Rooking their guests
And cooking the books.
Seldom do you see
Honest men like me
A gent of good intent
Who's content to be

Master of the house
Doling out the charm
Ready with a handshake
And an open palm
Tells a saucy tale
Makes a little stir
Customers appreciate a bon-viveur
Glad to do a friend a favor
Doesn't cost me to be nice
But nothing gets you nothing
Everything has got a little price!

Master of the house
Keeper of the zoo
Ready to relieve 'em
Of a sou or two
Watering the wine
Making up the weight
Pickin' up their knick-knacks
When they can't see straight
Everybody loves a landlord
Everybody's bosom friend
I do whatever pleases
Jesus! Won't I bleed 'em in the end!

THENARDIER & CHORUS
Master of the house
Quick to catch yer eye
Never wants a passerby
To pass him by
Servant to the poor
Butler to the great
Comforter, philosopher,
And lifelong mate!
Everybody's boon companion
Everybody's chaperone

THENARDIER
But lock up your valises
Jesus! Won't I skin you to the bone!

(To another new customer)

THENARDIER
Enter M'sieur
Lay down your load
Unlace your boots
And rest from the road

(Taking his bag)

This weighs a ton
Travel's a curse
But here we strive
To lighten your purse
Here the goose is cooked
Here the fat is fried
And nothing's overlooked
Till I'm satisfied...

Food beyond compare
Food beyond belief
Mix it in a mincer
And pretend it's beef
Kidney of a horse
Liver of a cat
Filling up the sausages
With this and that

Residents are more than welcome
Bridal suite is occupied
Reasonable charges
Plus some little extras on the side!

Charge 'em for the lice
Extra for the mice
Two percent for looking in the mirror twice
Here a little slice
There a little cut
Three percent for sleeping with the window shut
When it comes to fixing prices
There are a lot of tricks he knows
How it all increases
All those bits and pieces
Jesus! It's amazing how it grows!

THENARDIER AND CHORUS
Master of the house
Quick to catch yer eye
Never wants a passerby
To pass him by
Servant to the poor
Butler to the great
Comforter, philosopher,
And lifelong mate!
Everybody's boon companion
Gives 'em everything he's got

THENARDIER
Dirty bunch of geezers
Jesus! What a sorry little lot!

MME. THENARDIER
I used to dream
That I would meet a prince
But God Almighty,
Have you seen what's happened since?
`Master of the house?'
Isn't worth me spit!
`Comforter, philosopher'
- and lifelong shit!
Cunning little brain
Regular Voltaire
Thinks he's quite a lover
But there's not much there
What a cruel trick of nature
Landed me with such a louse
God knows how I've lasted
Living with this bastard in the house!


THENARDIER & CHORUS
Master of the house.

MME. THENARDIER
Master and a half!

THENARDIER & CHORUS
Comforter, philosopher

MME. THENARDIER
Ah, don't make me laugh!

THENARDIER & CHORUS
Servant to the poor. Butler to the great.

MME. THENARDIER
Hypocrite and toady and inebriate!

THENARDIER & CHORUS
Everybody bless the landlord!
Everybody bless his spouse!

THENARDIER
Everybody raise a glass

MME. THENARDIER
Raise it up the master's arse.

ALL
Everybody raise a glass to the master of the house!

 

[TygerEyez]

*squeals in laughter* Sorry, been away too long. OMG, I love Les Miserables. Lea Salonga is the most fabulous Eponine ever! And her as Kim?! The original, and still the best.

ON MY OWN -- I'm turning this into a dedication for all of you out there with unrequited love.

On my own
Pretending he's beside me
All alone
I walk with him 'til morning
Without him, I feel his arms around me
And when I lose my way I close my eyes,
And he has found me

In the rain
The pavement shines like silver
All the lights
Are misty in the river
In the darkness
the trees are full of starlight
And all I see is him and me forever and forver.

And I know
It's only in my mind
That I'm talking to myself
And not to him
And although
I know that he is blind
Still I say, there's a way for us

I love him,
But when the night is over
He is gone
The river's just a river
Without him,
The world around me changes
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers

I love him
But everyday I'm learning
All my life, I've only been pretending
Without me
His world will go on turning
A world that's full of happiness
That I have never known...

I love him...
I love him...
I love him....
But only on my own...