Googling for gurus

[shereads]

No wonder this millennium sucks so far: it lacks a wise guru.

In honor of RG's passage into Lit Guru-hood, I went Googling for gurus and expected to find some ancient mystic whose followers had put together a website filled with Great Truths. You know, one of those bearded old guys who used to host the Beatles at his ashram. Wisdom. Peace. Enlightenment. Vegan recipes to consider and discard.

Seven Google pages into my search for a guru, I gave up. If wisdom is going to take half the night to find, why bother?

I found four pages devoted to tech products named Guru.

I found Gagdet Guru, Gizmo Guru, SurfGuru, PC Guru, Legal Guru, Guru Labs and The Gardening Guru.

I eventually found The Guru Granth Sahib, the Supreme Spiritual Authority and Head of the Sikh. Maybe worth the search, but I don't know. I'm sleepy and need to read at least one dirty story before I doze off.

Sorry, RG, I tried...How is it that this decade has tie-die and platform shoes, but no gurus? Is this Generation Huh?

 

[minsue]

Sher, whatever will we do if you ever find a cure to your insomnia?

 

[shereads]

Okay, I tried one more Google and found a source of wisdom called Guru Joe. Don't ask any complicated questions unless they can be answered "yes" or "no."

http://www.miniclip.com/askjoe.htm

 

[shereads]

Sher, whatever will we do if you ever find a cure to your insomnia?

Buy it?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I love Sher!

A poll was just what I needed tonight.

Thx.

~lucky

 

[shereads]

I love Sher!

A poll was just what I needed tonight.

Thx.

~lucky

My work is done here.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

MWAH!

 

[shereads]

Guru Joe introduced Blair the Motivator:

http://www.miniclip.com/motivator.htm

 

[cantdog]

Guru Joe said I'm getting laid tonight. He just might be what the world needs in the way of wisdom founts, or maybe artesian sources or springs of wisdom.

Or maybe it's just as good as flipping a fuckin coin, I dunno...

Where's my I Ching?

-Strife--
When ego attaches to a point of view the result is Strife.

Realizing everything is relative, he seeks either to embrace a radically different perspective, or to find an objective mediator.

He prefers working toward resolution to attempting to prevail.

Sheeit.

Looks like I get laid only if I'm laid 'way back...

That's more useful. With Guru Joe I felt like I was entitled...

 

[minsue]

Buy it?

Good point!

 

[shereads]

Cantdog, I feel wiser already. Thank you.

 

[minsue]

Guru Joe introduced Blair the Motivator:

http://www.miniclip.com/motivator.htm

Oh that's so wrong

 

[shereads]

Oh that's so wrong

Not as wrong as "Bush Gunfight."

 

[Guest]

Gurus are so over. People want personal trainers or assistants.

Perdita

 

[shereads]

Gurus are so over. People want personal trainers or assistants.

Perdita

Not me. I want a butler.

 

[cantdog]

Yeah, some people. If they taste good and know enough to go away after.

But you can't call poor rg a "Literotica Personal Trainer, can you?

 

[Guest]

But you can't call poor rg a "Literotica Personal Trainer, can you?

I'd hire him. P.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Gurus are so over. People want personal trainers or assistants. Perdita

Ms Perdita,

Right! We don't want no stinking Gurus.

We want a personal slave.

Burley

 

[cantdog]

He does have that je ne sais quoi.

Although I don't know what it is, exactly.

 

[Guest]

He does have that je ne sais quoi. Although I don't know what it is, exactly.

That's cos you're a bloke.

 

[cantdog]

I love those.

I told you a million times not to exaggerate.

Mind if I ask you a rhetorical question?

Cancer, shmanser! What's the difference, so long as you're healthy?

 

[cantdog]

And you best believe I'm a bloke, baby.

And you look real je ne sais quoi to me.

 

[Guest]

Mr. Dog:

Perdita

 

[neonlyte]

Not me. I want a butler.

Sher

I can Butler for you.
Thing is, the only part of the costume I have is the bow-tie.

Certain that Jeeves was a guru of sorts.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

LOL

Guru Joe introduced Blair the Motivator:

http://www.miniclip.com/motivator.htm

Oh, ouch, my sides...HELP! I can't stop clicking the hips and bum options. Ouch, ouch, ouch!

~lucky