good looking............?

[dolf]

out of curiosity.....again

seeing as BDSM is a much smaller pond to fish in than vanillaville are you more likely to compromise on looks?
or...another way...are you less shallow and more interested in personal and sexual compatability?

xx

 

[Quint]

Looks, yes I will compromise. Attraction, just not possible. Mental lust alone could only satisfy me online, and homey don't play that game.

 

[sunfox]

Okay, I voted for the second option, but let me qualify it by saying that I want attract-ion- more than attractive.

I'm simply not attracted to everyone.. so I'm disinterested in being involved with someone that I'm lukewarm about.

C's attractive to me, though, so it's not really a huge issue for me anymore... already found mine.

 

[CoolBlue74]

i voted " If she ain't perfect, I'm kicking her ass out the door."

 

[SomeHotKCGuy]

My vote was:

"kinda...i want attractive but not perfection"


What's in the mind is more important but looks do play a part.



SomeGuy

 

[Xelebes]

I voted kinda. I mean, if she's pretty she won't be worth a second look if she doesn't have it. It being that feeling. You know what I'm talking about? No? Damn.

 

[Liana26]

I was physically attracted to my Dom the second I saw him but even if I wasn't, I believe attraction can grow with time.

 

[Miss Diva]

My PYL and I both like the fact that we can function w/o the BSDM part. We are now friends. Am I attracted to him. Yes! I guess so otherwise I would not go back.

 

[bridgeburner]

I'm a beauty-junkie, and a compulsive voyeur, but when it comes to getting down and dirty with someone it's less based on looks than it is on energy. Looks will attract my initial interest but the wrong smell or the wrong personality will turn me off in a second.

I have a friend who is absofuckinlutely gorgeous. He's got a face like a fallen angel, nice body, deep voice -- but he's got a defeatist attitude and he tends to whine so I don't find him sexually attractive at all even though I could sit and stare at him quite happily for a half hour or so.


-B

 

[catalina_francisco]

I went for other. Even in my vanilla days physical beauty was on the bottom of my list of needs. I had some cool looking guys along the way, but it was not because of their looks in the conventional sense. The best relationships were usually with men who were not in that bracket. That being said, I think F is gorgeous and he can melt me with his smile, but I found out what he looked like after I had made a fairly big emotional investment into the relationship.

Catalina

 

[m wisdom]

I'm selfish. I want both personality and attraction
I choose kinda..., I would compromise much more on looks then on compatability. Without the right personality the looks means nothing but attractionis also importent to me.

Looks can also be improved if necessary but sexual compatability(usually) can't.

 

[rakastuja]

I voted for attraction...

Outlook is a part of personality. I know some really nice persons who just dont shower often enough, or who absolutely have no taste with clothes (I mean like putting wrong clothes in formal occasions)... cant really say that personality would make up for all of the appearance.

However I dont usually care what is called beautiful or handsome. Usually I find those more or less boring. I love unique looks, small details that you'll remember such things. I also love when appearance suits personality. Its great to see a wicked smile on a wicked person

Once I have seen an angel. A girl who was nearly perfection in classical beauty-sense. I felt urge to carry her to forest, tie to a three and have my ways with her - to posses her, have her as my toy and prize. One of the really rare occasions when I have felt lust to dominate

But generally... give me the normally cute neighbor guy/girl

 

[graceanne]

I put that attraction will come. I know this is true because I knew K for 3 years before ever developing an attraction to him. I mean, he's attractive, but he's not drop dead, eyes falling out of your head, gorgeus. I think he's incredibly sexy, but that's now.

I've also dated men who I didn't find 'attractive' because they were great guys. Attraction comes if the personality is right and chemistry is right.

 

[shy slave]

I would say physical attraction but so many men are attrative in their own way I would never choose, so its more a mental thing with me.

 

[Netzach]

I said yes, it's extremely important to me.

Before everyone thinks I'm operating in a shallow way, it's a very broad based question.

My sense of who and what makes me cream my panties based on physical attraction is not some narrow and conventional set of factors. I have had it hot for big, BBW big, little, butch, femme, male, female, delicious challenges to the male/female labels, young middle aged, and downright old.

But if someone actively repels me? It's not gonna happen, no matter what your personality. It can even be something like a pheramonal odor I don't quite like on an otherwise pretty face.

 

[Guest]

 

[graceanne]

I said yes, it's extremely important to me.

Before everyone thinks I'm operating in a shallow way, it's a very broad based question.

My sense of who and what makes me cream my panties based on physical attraction is not some narrow and conventional set of factors. I have had it hot for big, BBW big, little, butch, femme, male, female, delicious challenges to the male/female labels, young middle aged, and downright old.

But if someone actively repels me? It's not gonna happen, no matter what your personality. It can even be something like a pheramonal odor I don't quite like on an otherwise pretty face.

I have to admit, you're right. If someone is literally repeling it's not going to happen. But normally when someone literally repels me it's more than how they look. I've known for drop dead gorgeus guys to repel me. They just make my skin crawl.

 

[eroticspank]

Attraction is important to me but not that important.

I want and really enjoy a mental connection more than physical attraction, then as you connect more mentally you become more attracted physically.

Also I think what many of us may be talking about under "attraction" might just be higene to some. Smell good, showered or bathed, hair, hands, fingernails, clean...just taking good care of yourself can go a long way.

Personality is very important to me especially in the BDSM world..I have to be comfortable with my partner or Dom. When she gets into my mind because we click mentally it is wonderful when we play.

Having said all that......Having a beautiful partner physically AND one that I enjoy mentally is of course the best!

eroticspank

 

[rosco rathbone]

I've found that there is a sort of threshold of attractiveness, below which the person can be extremely sexy and fuckable; but won't quite make it into my affections. Of course, this threshold is completely subjective, my haughty hottie may well be your "pillowcase-her-head!" dog.

 

[NCShin]

I went with "kinda...i want attractive but not perfection."

I also kinda agree with rosco. I've been with some women who other guys might not find attractive but who I thought were.

Women can be attractive in many ways. They dont' have to have a runway model's body to be absolutely stunning.

I also prefer cute to beautiful if that makes any sense...

 

[sigsauerprinces]

i need to be attracted to the person i'm with. my standard of attractiveness is a lot different than most womens tho. i dont go for chippendales dancers or male models or fabio or the backstreet boys. i like rough-looking guys. but like catalina, i made a substantial emotional investment in my relationship-i told him i loved him in fact-before i knew what he looked like. but the feeling was so strong and true i couldnt NOT tell him. everynight when we had talked for hours and were saying goodbye, the urge to tell him how i felt was so overwhelming it actually HURT not to do it, so finaly i had to. at that moment i honestly didnt care what he looked like. i saw his picture perhaps a month later tho, and he is gorgeous

 

[Desdemona]

Attraction is about a whole variety of things for me. He could be totally hot in a visual way, but if I think he's an ass, forget it. If he's physically not what I want, but I really care about him, the attraction grows with time.

 

[bg23]

i want attraction. i don't necessarily want good looking - but there has to be sexual attraction. else it just doesn't work.

 

[dolf]

hello bad_girl (note underscore!)

*stalk*

yes, for me a lot of attraction is down to smell...you never really know if a relationship has a chance until you smell them coz if the pheramones don't fit it's hopeless
i've felt very attracted to people who i never considered good looking.
xx

 

[witcha]

I picked kinda..I want attractive but not perfection......I guess personality is more important for me, but not saying that if the guy looks nice he won't get a few extra points





witcha