golf newbie advice needed

[sexy-girl]

im planning on becoming a professional golfer within the year ... however i've never picked up a golf club before today so some advice is needed


planning on going to a driving range sometime next week but at the moment i have a golf practice ball thingy ... you hit the ball and its attached to some string so it doesn't go flying off


i can almost consistently hit the ball but my action feels all wrong ... like the film legend of bagger vance ... every person has one true swing and you have to find that true swing ... well what if my one true swing is a bag of crap ?


i want to know where my ass is meant to be which arm is meant to bend which leg go's over my shoulder and which swear words do i scream when i kick a divot the size of the grand canyon out of my mothers lawn


any advice for a newbie golfer would be very welcome

 

[desert spike]

Here's some tips

i want to know where my ass is meant to be : backed up against me pressing hard

which arm is meant to bend - don't need to bend your arm... just reach back and grab my ball sac. Helps you hit a long shot off the tee.

which leg go's over my shoulder - doesn't matter which one it'll look great either way

which swear words do i scream when i kick a divot the size of the grand canyon out of my mothers lawn - Oh drive it to me baby!

 

[truegentleman]

Well, first I would have to see the ass that you are talking about.



........As far as what words to use, they all come in handy at one time or another.


best advice, take a couple lessons and just have fun.

 

[RawHumor]

The best advice is to actually pay for lessons. Bad habits are tough to break, so if you can develop good form early on, it'll be worth the time and money.

Besides, if you're going pro in a year, you can just take out a loan now and pay it off then.

 

[Guest]

golf!!!

i havent played for 25 years so i have forgot anything i knew about it , but you are going to need a caddy , i might want to apply for that job

 

[Calamity Jane]

My only advice is... no matter how much the golf course looks like an excellent place to train your horse not to be afraid of water jumps, and galloping up and down hills... don't do it. THe greenskeeper will not understand.

 

[markb325]

I have to agree with RH on this paying for lessons is the best way to go.

 

[Marxist]

Lesbians and golf....no stereotype there.


Excuse my poor pronunciation, I'm chewing on watermelon.

 

[Ukin]

im planning on becoming a professional golfer within the year ... however i've never picked up a golf club before today so some advice is needed


planning on going to a driving range sometime next week but at the moment i have a golf practice ball thingy ... you hit the ball and its attached to some string so it doesn't go flying off


i can almost consistently hit the ball but my action feels all wrong ... like the film legend of bagger vance ... every person has one true swing and you have to find that true swing ... well what if my one true swing is a bag of crap ?


i want to know where my ass is meant to be which arm is meant to bend which leg go's over my shoulder and which swear words do i scream when i kick a divot the size of the grand canyon out of my mothers lawn


any advice for a newbie golfer would be very welcome

First of all..you have to learn how to grip the shaft It should be light, not tight, enclose your fingers around it, apply a little pressure...

Being a golfer..I wish you all the best...go and see a local Pro (no..not THAT sort of Pro) I am sure his standing behind you as you learn the correct stance will sort the ass problem out...you have to push your ass back

 

[sexy-girl]

lol thanks for all the advice and the "advice" ... i know i probably need a lesson or something but i really want to go straight into it first and see what its like ... its frustrating now that im actually getting the bug of hitting a ball but not being able to see where it would go ... i think driving range will help ... my sister is trying to give me a few tips but shes a golf newbie really anyway shes maybe been 6 times ... will keep you all informed on my progress ... any more tips are welcome ... im going back outside to give a few more practice swings just wanted to pop back online and see if anyone had mentioned any magical tricks that make you instantly good ... pagancowgirl you made me smile


following my stereotype

 

[Marxist]

following my stereotype

How's your tennis-ability, Billy Jean Martina?

 

[RawHumor]

Excuse my poor pronunciation, I'm chewing on watermelon.

Would you kick my ass if I said something about putting velcro on the ceiling above your bed?

 

[sexy-girl]

LOL ... yikes ... i got to see where the ball would go after i hit it ... the nut that holds the string to the ball came off and the ball went flying over my back fence into the distance ... whoops ... oh well i will have to buy a replacement since it was borrowed ... £5.99 i guess that is why it broke ... cheap equipment ... lucky i didnt break the golf clubs though they are a £200 set


marxist well the tennis season is starting but my other lesbian partner is still away ... we're play some tennis when shes back


desert spike nice positions but im the wrong stereotype

 

[desert spike]

desert spike nice positions but im the wrong stereotype

Don't matter to me if you only like the ladies. That just fires up the imagination even more. I can still fantasize about our golf position.

Good luck with the golf game.

 

[phrodeau]

Don't forget - "golf" is "flog" backwards.

Be careful out there.

 

[WaxNWane]

Warning: legitimate golf advice follows. No sexual innuendo included, though it's pretty much impossible to talk about golf without it sounding like a bad porno script. (Is "bad porno script" redundant?) Grips, shafts, balls, holes, yada yada...

Lessons are a good idea. Find someone you're comfortable with, and understand that you're going to really, really suck for a little while. And if the teacher doesn't stress that you need to learn the fundamentals (grip, stance, posture) first, find one that does.

If you don't have a good grip and a balanced, athletic stance, everything about your swing will be corrections for that.

I've never taken lessons. Managed to get myself down around a 5 handicap when I played a lot during college, but probably had some habits that I would've had to break before i could get much better.

To babble a bit, the golf swing is a balanced transfer of weight to the back inside of your back foot (right foot if your right-handed), then a balanced transfer of weight to your front foot. It's all about the turn, the coil of your body. The coil of your hips and shoulders against the solid resistance of the ground is where your power comes from. (In other words, you don't get power by hitting the ball with your hands.)

The arm swing is just a matter of not forcing anything: don't pick the club up too fast; don't hurry the backswing; especially don't hurry the transition from backswing to forward swing.

The most typical move you'll see a bad golfer make is to start their forward swing down with their hands, and they essentially throw the club at the ball (as opposed to letting your arms fall naturally in response to the weight shift). That's what I meant by 'hitting the ball with your hands'. You'll get to the ball before your weight has caught up with you, you'll break your wrists to do so and hit the ball weakly, usually slicing it because you got the clubface open early. Then you'll finish out-of-balance with your weight on your back foot. Veddy bad. A balanced finish shows that a good swing just happened. But don't worry, when you get your swing down, the balanced finish happens on its own.

That rambling amounts to: don't be in a hurry to hit the ball. Let your body find the right tempo to hit the ball squarely. .

All that said, it still comes back to fundamentals. Good grip, good stance, good posture. Then you'll have a much easier time making a good weight shift and letting your arms swing on the proper plane in response to that weight shift.

And, remember that most of your score is going to be your short game (putting, chipping, pitching). A great swing with a crappy short game makes a mediocre golfer. Improving your short game effects your score the most. At least half of the time you practice should be your short game.

 

[sexy-girl]

SOOOOOOOOOOOO COOL ... thank you so much waxNwane ... that was exactly the perfect advice i was looking for ... im going to save your post and read it a few times before and after some more practice swings in the garden ... tommorow though i dont want to look to insane doing it at past midnight

 

[WriterDom]

Golf is a game you really need to learn how to play, not play to learn. You're secret swings in the garden at midnight are just going to reinforce bad habits. I'm not saying you need a teacher forever, unless your serious about becoming pro, but at least find someone to start you out right with the proper grip and swing. It wont hurt to read golf books and watch videos. And just play, you'll get better.

 

[LukkyKnight]

The best advice is to actually pay for lessons.

Nah, best advice is to play a sport where they bring the ball back for you.

 

[april-wine]

Ummmmmmmm didn't Lisa leave strict instructions to wallow aimlessly in self-pity locked up in your room, while she was away????..............

 

[lobito]

sexay-girl, I don't have any advice other than, once you get youre first hole in one, there's really no challenge left in the game, is there?

It happened on my 5th time playing golf, and I've sucked the big one ever since.

 

[Guru]

 

[Saint Peter]

I always do really well until the last hole. No matter how I play it I can never get the ball back outta the clown's nose.

 

[sexy-girl]

Ummmmmmmm didn't Lisa leave strict instructions to wallow aimlessly in self-pity locked up in your room, while she was away????..............

well i've been doing that for the first few weeks but everywhere i go there seens to be people with a nasty habbit of trying to cheer me up ... at work at home ... and a fair few people here that do that ... hmmm i cant think of any of them right now ...


lobito i will i try and remember that ... the ball in the hole ... makes sense


guru we pronouce it as old persons sport


WD i know i will need lessons but i just want to find out if i enjoy it first and to have a few hints so i wont look TOO stupid if i do look stupid i'll try another sport maybe like knight says


saintpeter if i can get it in the clowns nose i'll be a happy girl

 

[sexy-girl]

went to the driving range yesterday ... and i didnt do my biggest fear and let go of the club and watch it fly out onto the range

i did ok actually at first i did just a half swing and i was doing well and getting good distance ... by the end i did full swings and was doing well ... i hit one perfect shot where i actually heard the ball go *ping*

going to play a 9 hole course either tommorow or friday