get over the ex
- Thread starter 789nk
- Start date
Eilan
Absent(ish)
- Joined
- Jan 24, 2005
- Posts
- 10,431
As trite as it sounds, time really does help things, and some people need more time to heal. When you're ready to date other people, you'll know it.
When my husband and his ex split up, some friends of his made a point of including him whenever they went out. They would have found a date for him, but he told them he wasn't ready. After a time, he was ready and he started looking. It didn't happen overnight, though.
Later this month, I'm approaching the six-year anniversary of when my ex left me (and our then two-year-old and two-month-old) for someone else. For about the first seven or eight months, I threw myself into working and caring for my kids. I wallowed in my grief whenever I had some down time. Eventually, though, I got tired of feeling sorry for myself and I decided that I was ready to move on.
When my husband and his ex split up, some friends of his made a point of including him whenever they went out. They would have found a date for him, but he told them he wasn't ready. After a time, he was ready and he started looking. It didn't happen overnight, though.
Later this month, I'm approaching the six-year anniversary of when my ex left me (and our then two-year-old and two-month-old) for someone else. For about the first seven or eight months, I threw myself into working and caring for my kids. I wallowed in my grief whenever I had some down time. Eventually, though, I got tired of feeling sorry for myself and I decided that I was ready to move on.
Mazuri
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2006
- Posts
- 543
You found out yesterday that all hope was gone and yet you're already sick of feeling this way? Getting over the loss of a relationship takes time. It's very similar to the grieving process in which you go through denial, anger, bargaining, guilt, depression, loneliness, acceptance, and hope.
For the longest time, you've been in denial. You knew your relationship was over (when you split being a couple) but you refused to acknowledge that and kept hoping it would turn out alright.
Now you're at anger. Anger at yourself over lost time, wasted time, feeling like you were used and a variety of other things. Let the anger out in a healthy way...it really will help.
Bargaining is hardest as you'll try to find some way to stay in this girl's life. Don't give in to that. No, you can't be friends right now, the pain is too raw. No, you can't call to ask how her relationship is doing. Sever ties NOW until you've gone through the entire process.
Guilt will occur right about the time you sever ties. You'll find things you feel you should have done differently. This is when the "IF ONLYs" set in. Let it run it's course but don't beat yourself up too badly. YOU aren't the one who ended the relationship, so you have nothing to feel guilty about.
Depression and loneliness usually occur together. You'll be sad. You'll cry. You'll feel lonely. Allow for this, however, don't shut yourself away and never leave. Memories are good to look back on, not wallow in. Cry if you must, but then move on. Find an activity, charity, or organization you can support, and jump in both feet. Do something with yourself and your time. Don't wallow in the pain, but do allow yourself time to feel it so you can move on to...
Acceptance. This is when you truly acknowledge there's nothing left between the two of you. Yes, you heard her say it was over way up there before Denial, but now it's kinda sunk in and you realize it truly is. Once you've accepted the change in your life then you can move on to Hope.
Hope is when you feel ready to try again. This is when you can look back on this relationship with nostalgia, and perhaps a hint of sadness, but no pain. This is when you know you're ready and whole to find someone new. Someone who will love you for you and not change their minds.
This process can take days, weeks, months....for some even years. I'm sure there are some who say they skip a stage, but in actuality I believe they just process and move much quicker through that one to the next. The end of a relationship is very similar to a death and thus the emotions you feel are very similar as well.
Good luck.
For the longest time, you've been in denial. You knew your relationship was over (when you split being a couple) but you refused to acknowledge that and kept hoping it would turn out alright.
Now you're at anger. Anger at yourself over lost time, wasted time, feeling like you were used and a variety of other things. Let the anger out in a healthy way...it really will help.
Bargaining is hardest as you'll try to find some way to stay in this girl's life. Don't give in to that. No, you can't be friends right now, the pain is too raw. No, you can't call to ask how her relationship is doing. Sever ties NOW until you've gone through the entire process.
Guilt will occur right about the time you sever ties. You'll find things you feel you should have done differently. This is when the "IF ONLYs" set in. Let it run it's course but don't beat yourself up too badly. YOU aren't the one who ended the relationship, so you have nothing to feel guilty about.
Depression and loneliness usually occur together. You'll be sad. You'll cry. You'll feel lonely. Allow for this, however, don't shut yourself away and never leave. Memories are good to look back on, not wallow in. Cry if you must, but then move on. Find an activity, charity, or organization you can support, and jump in both feet. Do something with yourself and your time. Don't wallow in the pain, but do allow yourself time to feel it so you can move on to...
Acceptance. This is when you truly acknowledge there's nothing left between the two of you. Yes, you heard her say it was over way up there before Denial, but now it's kinda sunk in and you realize it truly is. Once you've accepted the change in your life then you can move on to Hope.
Hope is when you feel ready to try again. This is when you can look back on this relationship with nostalgia, and perhaps a hint of sadness, but no pain. This is when you know you're ready and whole to find someone new. Someone who will love you for you and not change their minds.
This process can take days, weeks, months....for some even years. I'm sure there are some who say they skip a stage, but in actuality I believe they just process and move much quicker through that one to the next. The end of a relationship is very similar to a death and thus the emotions you feel are very similar as well.
Good luck.
redneckgirl
Experienced
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2006
- Posts
- 91
I think Mazuri said it all............good advice. 
BloodFluke
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2006
- Posts
- 147
A lot of this is like quitting any habit, any addiction, good or bad. You have years of habit with this person. Being in the places that were the same, the thoughts that were the same, the actions that were the same, only now they're missing.
To break the habit, you have to do the same thing you would with quitting cigarettes. No more of this person. No more thinking of them. No more being with them. No more building a life with them. The process of remembering is the withdrawal pangs.
Don't feed it. Don't think about it, thinking won't change it, any more that thinking about cigarettes is going to help you kick the habit. Find something, or someone, else to do. The less you let your thoughts travel the path you walked with the person that's no longer there, you get cold turkey withdrawal. Otherwise you're dragging out the withdrawal process by feeding yourself bits of memory to make it seem like it's happening now. Let it go.
To break the habit, you have to do the same thing you would with quitting cigarettes. No more of this person. No more thinking of them. No more being with them. No more building a life with them. The process of remembering is the withdrawal pangs.
Don't feed it. Don't think about it, thinking won't change it, any more that thinking about cigarettes is going to help you kick the habit. Find something, or someone, else to do. The less you let your thoughts travel the path you walked with the person that's no longer there, you get cold turkey withdrawal. Otherwise you're dragging out the withdrawal process by feeding yourself bits of memory to make it seem like it's happening now. Let it go.
footlongish
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2006
- Posts
- 570
I've been there. We all probably have been.
The first thing you need to do is find someone you can really talk to, someone to unload everything you are feeling on. You are probably keeping it all inside right now and that is a bad thing. You might not want this to be a family member or even a close friend if you want to protect your privacy. You'll probably be a little whiny and needy (we all are at this point) and maybe you don't want to tell family or friends *everything* like you would someone else. But you need to get it out. Maybe have a good cry too, even if you are a man.
The next thing you need to do is find a friend. Someone to be the person your Ex was, just in the friend sense of it. To do the things you did together. To take some of your time and get you out of the house. The sooner you get out and about the sooner you'll start to heal. Staying at home by yourself is the last thing you should do.
Then you need to find a lover or two. Everyone says that time heals, and it does, but in reality, nothing heals like being in the arms of someone again. It might be a little painful at first, if it brings up feelings about your Ex, but it will feel good to love someone and be loved again, even if the new lover isn't part of a long term relationship. A couple nights of hot passionate sex can do wonders for a broken heart. Hugs help too.
Once you've talked yourself out and cried a bit and made a new friend and had a lover or two, you'll be ready to get on with a new real relationship.
As far as the person to talk to/friend goes, you might be surprised at how well an email friend is, especially if you are both going through the same thing. And you might be surprised at what you learn through all of this.
And one other thing - NOBODY is irreplaceable. I once thought I lost the only woman that would make me happy, but I was wrong. There are lots of great women out there and I'll bet that you could/would/will be as happy or more happy with another woman as you were with your Ex.
The first thing you need to do is find someone you can really talk to, someone to unload everything you are feeling on. You are probably keeping it all inside right now and that is a bad thing. You might not want this to be a family member or even a close friend if you want to protect your privacy. You'll probably be a little whiny and needy (we all are at this point) and maybe you don't want to tell family or friends *everything* like you would someone else. But you need to get it out. Maybe have a good cry too, even if you are a man.
The next thing you need to do is find a friend. Someone to be the person your Ex was, just in the friend sense of it. To do the things you did together. To take some of your time and get you out of the house. The sooner you get out and about the sooner you'll start to heal. Staying at home by yourself is the last thing you should do.
Then you need to find a lover or two. Everyone says that time heals, and it does, but in reality, nothing heals like being in the arms of someone again. It might be a little painful at first, if it brings up feelings about your Ex, but it will feel good to love someone and be loved again, even if the new lover isn't part of a long term relationship. A couple nights of hot passionate sex can do wonders for a broken heart. Hugs help too.
Once you've talked yourself out and cried a bit and made a new friend and had a lover or two, you'll be ready to get on with a new real relationship.
As far as the person to talk to/friend goes, you might be surprised at how well an email friend is, especially if you are both going through the same thing. And you might be surprised at what you learn through all of this.
And one other thing - NOBODY is irreplaceable. I once thought I lost the only woman that would make me happy, but I was wrong. There are lots of great women out there and I'll bet that you could/would/will be as happy or more happy with another woman as you were with your Ex.
Last edited:
Thanks for the advice everyone. I know I should stop thinking about her, but I just can't. I have the anger, depression(bad), and loneliness. I don't feel any guilt, I did everything a person could do to try to make her happy. I do keep thinking "what if", maybe I could if done something differant. There is no feeling of hope I can tell you that. This wouldn't be so bad if I was in early 20's but I'm in my early 30's. All my friends are married, so there is nobody to do anything with. I guess I'm kinda shy, and don't seem to have much luck meeting new poeple. Sitting here right now I don't think that I'm ever going to meet anyone. I really don't want to be the old crazy guy who dies alone.
footlongish
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2006
- Posts
- 570
Whoa there buddy. Early 30s ? You aren't old at all.
Go get yourself an account on www.plentyoffish.com and you'll see there are lots of men and women your age looking for relationships.
The next thing you have to realize is that not all women are errr... rational. (My apologies, ladies... not all men are rational either.) If she doesn't want you, there isn't anything you can do about it. I've been there too. Don't waste your time. Stop thinking "If I just would have" and that sort of thing.
No, you can't forget about her, but women that don't realise your value aren't worth wasting time on, even if you are right ! Trust me on this. You will have a 10x better relationship with someone that realizes your value than someone who has to be convinced.
We know what you are going through. Its time to get out of the house and get away from the computer and clear your head. Or find a friend online and start talking. You might feel awful for a few days, but the sooner you accept that its over the easier it will be. Don't chase her. Don't idolize her. Remember her bad points and remind yourself why you DON'T want to be with her.
You aren't going to be some crazy guy that dies alone. We all fear loneliness. Its irrational to think that you won't find a mate that makes you happy.
Go get yourself an account on www.plentyoffish.com and you'll see there are lots of men and women your age looking for relationships.
The next thing you have to realize is that not all women are errr... rational. (My apologies, ladies... not all men are rational either.) If she doesn't want you, there isn't anything you can do about it. I've been there too. Don't waste your time. Stop thinking "If I just would have" and that sort of thing.
No, you can't forget about her, but women that don't realise your value aren't worth wasting time on, even if you are right ! Trust me on this. You will have a 10x better relationship with someone that realizes your value than someone who has to be convinced.
We know what you are going through. Its time to get out of the house and get away from the computer and clear your head. Or find a friend online and start talking. You might feel awful for a few days, but the sooner you accept that its over the easier it will be. Don't chase her. Don't idolize her. Remember her bad points and remind yourself why you DON'T want to be with her.
You aren't going to be some crazy guy that dies alone. We all fear loneliness. Its irrational to think that you won't find a mate that makes you happy.
Since I'm bitchen about everything heres another one. Everytime I see my parents they allways ask about her, and go on about how nice it would be to see her. I know they mean well but it just makes me feel like crap. I'd like to see her to but it's not going to happen.
I no everyone says to go out and bang some hot chick, well I would if I could find a hot chick that wanted to be with me I would. I guess I could get the ugle divorced chick on wellfair with three kids. But I'm not sure that would make me feel better.
I no everyone says to go out and bang some hot chick, well I would if I could find a hot chick that wanted to be with me I would. I guess I could get the ugle divorced chick on wellfair with three kids. But I'm not sure that would make me feel better.
CutieMouse
Meticulously Flighty
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2004
- Posts
- 8,493
789nk said:
Inform your parents that you two are no longer in a relationship, and their comments are insensitive and painful.
Mourn for a bit, then suck up and try again- with someone else.
Signed,
A divorced, self-employed chick, with five kids (who live with their father).
footlongish
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2006
- Posts
- 570
Burn the pictures. Yes, those were good times, but she is gone. She has your number, right ? If she wants you, she will call. But don't wait for that call. Get out of the house and start talking to people. Trust me.
Mazuri
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2006
- Posts
- 543
789nk said:
Most of the stages don't come all at once...they're stages. You progress from one to the other. Yes, you're angry. Good, that's healthy. However, staying in that stage for too long isn't healthy. The guilt may sneak up on you, and yes, the loneliness sucks.
What helped me when I lost a really really good friend was to find several outlets: I created a blog in which I used as my journal. It was private, no one had the address and it wasn't listed on the blog's index, but it was someplace I could pour it out. A handwritten journal would work too but I think better while typing. Another outlet was someone who was willing to hear me talk about the friend, who wouldn't say bad things about him, and who genuinely cared. This person let me cry, helped me to laugh again, and was very instrumental in helping me move to the Acceptance stage. The third was to get a hobby that kept me busy. I was out, doing something both physical and mental, and so my mind had other things to occupy it beyond my loss.
Early 30's is a good age. I wouldn't consider any age too old for a relationship, but truly, you're in your prime now. You are not going to die alone if you make up your mind not too. This is the depression talking. Find something you enjoy. If you like outdoorsy things, join a hiking club or volunteer at a park. If you enjoy working with kids, volunteer at a library, a school, your local Scouts, or youth camps. Mainly, find different ways to meet people with similar interests. For now, it's keeping you busy, but later, when you're ready, you have the contacts you need when you want to start looking again.
Yea, the loneliness/depression really suck. I was doing ok till I talked to her yesterday and see told me she was seeing someone. I never felt so hopeless in all my life. I don't know if she does it on purpose but she allway seems to say something to make me think there is a chance of us getting back together. I told her yesterday that now I know its over for sure. She made some comment about "nothings writen in stone". I don't know if she wants to keep me around as a plan B if she can't find anyone better, or maybe I just read more into it than I should. At this point it doesn't really mater I guess.
I know there lots of great woman out there but it sure seem hard to find one. I'm no Brad Pitt but I try to stay in shape. I think I have a lot of good qualities. Got nice house, ok job. Other than being totaly screwed up over this chick, I'm pretty stable person. I think I would be a good boy friend/husband. If any single women read this I'd love to meet some new poeple.
I know there lots of great woman out there but it sure seem hard to find one. I'm no Brad Pitt but I try to stay in shape. I think I have a lot of good qualities. Got nice house, ok job. Other than being totaly screwed up over this chick, I'm pretty stable person. I think I would be a good boy friend/husband. If any single women read this I'd love to meet some new poeple.
footlongish
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2006
- Posts
- 570
Don't talk to her anymore. Its over. Cut off all contact. If she won't do it, you have to because you will waste the next several years of your life yearning for her when there is no chance of having a good relationship anymore. She might be leading you to believe there is a chance, but she is probably just using you as a backstop in case her next relationship doesn't work. Don't let her do that to you.
No more contact. Period. You know what it does to you.
No more contact. Period. You know what it does to you.
akatrex
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 19, 2005
- Posts
- 2,805
footlongish said:
Been there done that.
Fell in love with the first. She dumped me and I went through hell. We got back together and proceded to get married. Two years later I divorced her!
Believe me there are women beautiful(inside and out) out there waiting.
"Time heals all wounds"
P.S. I received an email for the above mentioned woman I divorced.
To Bad So Sad.
human_male
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 13, 2004
- Posts
- 4,791
He who said it's better to have loved and lost than never loved at all didn't know what he was talking about. Although neither is a picnic.
In all likelyhood though you'll find someone else. And you'll feel better eventually. There's nothing you can do, just concentrate on getting through the next sixty seconds.
And what footlong said, don't see or contact the ex anymore. Don't have anything to do with her. Out of sight out of mind (hopefully).
And you don't sound pathetic.
In all likelyhood though you'll find someone else. And you'll feel better eventually. There's nothing you can do, just concentrate on getting through the next sixty seconds.
And what footlong said, don't see or contact the ex anymore. Don't have anything to do with her. Out of sight out of mind (hopefully).
And you don't sound pathetic.
P
past_perfect
Guest
Most of what I could offer as advice has already been said. Each person has a unique way of dealing with loss and the emotions it entails. Some have to keep them on the surface in order to be able to work through them there and then, others find distraction and realignment more pertinent and helpful. Your feelings may not change at all, but the importance you assign to them certainly will.
From my own personal experience I would have to say that I find it easier to let those feelings recede to the background before attempting to work through them and that meant for me distracting myself with hobbies, friends and activities that helped me create some sort of stability and balance. That of course has to do with fact that you are not just dealing with a void created by the absence of the person you love, but also with finding a preconceived future in shambles.
From my own personal experience I would have to say that I find it easier to let those feelings recede to the background before attempting to work through them and that meant for me distracting myself with hobbies, friends and activities that helped me create some sort of stability and balance. That of course has to do with fact that you are not just dealing with a void created by the absence of the person you love, but also with finding a preconceived future in shambles.
Last edited by a moderator:
Well here is the latest. I called her yesterday and told her she still had some clothes her and she might want to get them. She came over today and got all of her stuff. Man do I feel like crap now. It was so nice to see her, but knowing it was going to be the last time is heartbreaking. I really don't think I'm ever going to get over her. Atleast all of her stuff is gone, maybe that will help.
footlongish
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2006
- Posts
- 570
Keep your chin up, 789.
It is way, way too early to predict you will never get over her.
How are things over at plentyOfFish.com ? I'm not saying you are ready to date, but it might brighten your outlook to window shop. Have you written your profile yet and listed all the great things about you ? Got any PMs yet ? Made any Internet friends yet ? Are you talking to someone about your situation ?
I know today was hard for you. We've all been there. I remember dropping a gf off at a bus station, saying goodbye and not seeing her for 15 years. Yeah, it hurts. But it isn't going to kill you. In fact, it might make you a lot stronger.
And there are so many other, great women out there for you. Really, I mean that. There isn't just one woman that can make you happy. There are lots. Maybe they won't be exactly the same as your Ex, but they will be special in their own way. Maybe BETTER than your Ex. I'll tell you that the woman I dated after I dropped the "love of my life" off at the bus station was a much better woman for me. I was much happier with her. Honest. And I was ready to join the monks and take a vow of celibacy because I was sure I would never love again.
It is way, way too early to predict you will never get over her.
How are things over at plentyOfFish.com ? I'm not saying you are ready to date, but it might brighten your outlook to window shop. Have you written your profile yet and listed all the great things about you ? Got any PMs yet ? Made any Internet friends yet ? Are you talking to someone about your situation ?
I know today was hard for you. We've all been there. I remember dropping a gf off at a bus station, saying goodbye and not seeing her for 15 years. Yeah, it hurts. But it isn't going to kill you. In fact, it might make you a lot stronger.
And there are so many other, great women out there for you. Really, I mean that. There isn't just one woman that can make you happy. There are lots. Maybe they won't be exactly the same as your Ex, but they will be special in their own way. Maybe BETTER than your Ex. I'll tell you that the woman I dated after I dropped the "love of my life" off at the bus station was a much better woman for me. I was much happier with her. Honest. And I was ready to join the monks and take a vow of celibacy because I was sure I would never love again.
Last edited:
footlongish
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2006
- Posts
- 570
Don't be afraid to cry. I'm a man too and I can't cry. But every now and then I do and it feels good, especially if I have a nice warm female shoulder to cry on. We are men. We are tough. We are strong. But we have feelings too. And we hurt when we love someone and they don't love us back.
So... man to man, I give you full permission to have a good cry. You don't have to tell anyone. Nobody is going to make fun of you. Remember all the good times you had together. Remember the smell of her hair and how you liked to look at her naked. Remember what it was like when you made love to her. And say goodbye to it all. And acknowledge that it hurts and that you are in pain. Don't try to control that, because you can't. Acknowledge it. You loved her. She didn't love you back. That is the way it is. Cry. Bawl. Curl up in a ball for a few hours. Do it a few times. No, its not manly. But men don't have to be tough and strong all the time.
And when you acknowledged that you hurt inside and you get some of that pain out, let us know and we'll help you to start to rebuild.
Do you have any close female friends ? Someone you could talk to and hug ?
So... man to man, I give you full permission to have a good cry. You don't have to tell anyone. Nobody is going to make fun of you. Remember all the good times you had together. Remember the smell of her hair and how you liked to look at her naked. Remember what it was like when you made love to her. And say goodbye to it all. And acknowledge that it hurts and that you are in pain. Don't try to control that, because you can't. Acknowledge it. You loved her. She didn't love you back. That is the way it is. Cry. Bawl. Curl up in a ball for a few hours. Do it a few times. No, its not manly. But men don't have to be tough and strong all the time.
And when you acknowledged that you hurt inside and you get some of that pain out, let us know and we'll help you to start to rebuild.
Do you have any close female friends ? Someone you could talk to and hug ?
Last edited:
footlongish
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2006
- Posts
- 570
A couple more things. You need to set a goal for yourself today. That you will never initiate contact with her again. Yeah, its totally opposite of what you feel you want right now, but its what you must do. She will break your heart every time, just like she did today, if you let her. And you don't want that, do you ? You need to move on to greener pastures.
And the second part of the goal is to find ways to live an enjoyable life WITHOUT her. So, what did you do for fun BEFORE her ? No, its not going to be AS fun as it was with her, but she isn't in your life any more. But you had fun BEFORE her, right ? I mean, you weren't miserable, right ? So, for now, you have to step back to what that was. Just for now. Someday you will have a girl friend that you can do stuff with like you did for her. But right now you need to take a step back from that.
And, reading between the lines, I suspect she is only half the issue. Yes, you lost HER, but I think the other part of things is you might be afraid of not finding SOMEONE ELSE. Maybe we can help you with that part too. In this day and age, there is no need to be alone and maybe we can help you get "back in the saddle" so to speak.
Lots of people have helped me recently. I like giving back to the community by helping you.
So cry if you need to and stay in touch with us here.
And the second part of the goal is to find ways to live an enjoyable life WITHOUT her. So, what did you do for fun BEFORE her ? No, its not going to be AS fun as it was with her, but she isn't in your life any more. But you had fun BEFORE her, right ? I mean, you weren't miserable, right ? So, for now, you have to step back to what that was. Just for now. Someday you will have a girl friend that you can do stuff with like you did for her. But right now you need to take a step back from that.
And, reading between the lines, I suspect she is only half the issue. Yes, you lost HER, but I think the other part of things is you might be afraid of not finding SOMEONE ELSE. Maybe we can help you with that part too. In this day and age, there is no need to be alone and maybe we can help you get "back in the saddle" so to speak.
Lots of people have helped me recently. I like giving back to the community by helping you.
So cry if you need to and stay in touch with us here.
Thanks for trying to cheer me up. What suck is she was my best freind, the one that new everything about me, the one that I could talk to about anything. Thats why I thought it was such a great relationship.
Guess I'm hoping that writing everything on here will help in some way.
I'm not into hanging out in bars, there are allmost no women where I work, and I can't see myself just asking someone out I see in wallmart. I joined one of the internet dating sites a couple of monthes ago. The results were not to good. Guess thats why I feel that I'm not going to meet anyone else. I think I have so much to offer but... I keep thinking there must be something wrong with me. Everyone else seems to find someone without any problem.
Guess I'm hoping that writing everything on here will help in some way.
I'm not into hanging out in bars, there are allmost no women where I work, and I can't see myself just asking someone out I see in wallmart. I joined one of the internet dating sites a couple of monthes ago. The results were not to good. Guess thats why I feel that I'm not going to meet anyone else. I think I have so much to offer but... I keep thinking there must be something wrong with me. Everyone else seems to find someone without any problem.
Mazuri
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2006
- Posts
- 543
You shouldn't be thinking of meeting anyone at this stage. You are not up to being in a new relationship and it wouldn't be fair for the girl you meet. Jumping into a relationship immediately after one bombs is generally a bad idea as your emotions are still raw. A lot of it is spite....sort of a mental "oh yeah? well, now I've got someone else too!" While it might make you feel good for the short term, how will you feel when the girl you're with realizes she's not really a person, but a tool in your desire to hurt your ex? Sort yourself out first, before trying to find someone else.
A few days is far far too soon. Start looking in a few weeks or months.
A few days is far far too soon. Start looking in a few weeks or months.
sir_lancealot
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2004
- Posts
- 244
get over your ex?
The only way to get over someone you have loved is to replace her with a newer model.
Get over her by getting over someone else. I know it seems harsh but having been through it on far to many occasions I know it to be true....
You will get over it when you accept what has happened.
The only way to get over someone you have loved is to replace her with a newer model.
Get over her by getting over someone else. I know it seems harsh but having been through it on far to many occasions I know it to be true....
You will get over it when you accept what has happened.
