So I have a girl coming over tomorrow night that I've been getting physical with. And we're going to explore a little...play. As in she likes the ideal of being used but not humiliated, doesn't like hairpulling or choking. And I'm wondering if anyone out there has any advice? Has this same desire? What that has successful entailed for you in the past? I know...it's a bit short notice, but a PM would be great!
First time restraint...
- Thread starter beautylvr
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NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
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You'll get some advice here, but I'd recommend asking in the BDSM section if you want a word from the pros. 
Before you start, make sure that you both have a good idea of what she's ok with AND have a "safe" word that ends all play upon her command.
If you're going to use ropes and such to tie her with, make sure you've got scissors or an appropriate cutting tool handy to cut her free in the event of an emergency or a stubborn knot won't come loose. Don't use a knife, for obvious safety issues.
Before you start, make sure that you both have a good idea of what she's ok with AND have a "safe" word that ends all play upon her command.
If you're going to use ropes and such to tie her with, make sure you've got scissors or an appropriate cutting tool handy to cut her free in the event of an emergency or a stubborn knot won't come loose. Don't use a knife, for obvious safety issues.
SweetErika
Fingers Crossed
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- Apr 27, 2004
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- 13,442
Does she like spanking? If you don't know, ask if that's on the table. You can always start off lightly and increase the intensity as the situation calls for it.
Would you two be interested in sensation play? You probably already have a bunch of stuff in your house you can use, like ice, a hot mouth, soft materials, things that are rough, kitchen implements (for sensations and even some impact play, if she's into that, but if you do impact, I'd suggest sticking to the butt since it doesn't sound like you know what you're doing yet). Add some soft restraints and maybe a blindfold, and you could have a really fun time.
If you're going to do any bondage, read up on some basic safety measures (google 'bondage safety' and 'basic bondage' and 'bondage tutorials') and go get yourself a pair of safety/EMT shears (we got ours at Harbor Freight for like $2, but many drug and medical supply stores have them for under $10). Those are both important because you can do permanent damage if you don't know what you're doing, and it's your responsibility to be prepared for worst-case scenarios (like, say your partner is thrashing around in the throes of a seizure or other emergency and you need to get them out quickly without cutting or stabbing them).
If you're not comfortable with bondage and/or don't have the safety gear, you can restrain a willing partner with your hands, body or even words. For instance, you could hold their hands above their head, block them with your body or put a quarter between their nose and the wall and tell them to keep it there until you say otherwise.
Also, if you google 'BDSM checklist' you'll probably get a ton of ideas, and it's a really good idea to go through a comprehensive checklist with your partner to determine what their interests, soft and hard limits are.
Would you two be interested in sensation play? You probably already have a bunch of stuff in your house you can use, like ice, a hot mouth, soft materials, things that are rough, kitchen implements (for sensations and even some impact play, if she's into that, but if you do impact, I'd suggest sticking to the butt since it doesn't sound like you know what you're doing yet). Add some soft restraints and maybe a blindfold, and you could have a really fun time.
If you're going to do any bondage, read up on some basic safety measures (google 'bondage safety' and 'basic bondage' and 'bondage tutorials') and go get yourself a pair of safety/EMT shears (we got ours at Harbor Freight for like $2, but many drug and medical supply stores have them for under $10). Those are both important because you can do permanent damage if you don't know what you're doing, and it's your responsibility to be prepared for worst-case scenarios (like, say your partner is thrashing around in the throes of a seizure or other emergency and you need to get them out quickly without cutting or stabbing them).
If you're not comfortable with bondage and/or don't have the safety gear, you can restrain a willing partner with your hands, body or even words. For instance, you could hold their hands above their head, block them with your body or put a quarter between their nose and the wall and tell them to keep it there until you say otherwise.
Also, if you google 'BDSM checklist' you'll probably get a ton of ideas, and it's a really good idea to go through a comprehensive checklist with your partner to determine what their interests, soft and hard limits are.
roomfor1more
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Dec 3, 2010
- Posts
- 310
I would not try this if it is your first time with her. Being restrained involves trust and communication which usually does not exist when the relationship is new. Instead I would recommend getting to know her by talking to her about her interest, build the relationship, and then try it. You will find the both of you will get more from it.
miaction69
Literotica Guru
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- Jul 17, 2009
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ok, on the other side....
I had this 'kind of' play buddy- whose played a little (not a lot and not often)
anyway yesterday I sent a text (which I'll get to in a minute)...I should add playbuddy (now ex playbuddy) used to text filth but doesn't really anymore...
anyway, i have an opportunity for a new play buddy but the new opportunity just doesn't do it for me
my body just doesn't respond..and the former playbuddy really does...so I sent a text to him...mr. not very often playmate basically saying straight, I want you to tie me up and work me over..and I only want you to do it..NO REPLY ok I get the message...crawling under a rock right now)....but it taught me 2 things
A. he was totally turned off, of B. he just doesn't like me (I'm thinking B but not sure)
So my advice to your situation would be to NOT go in with the alternative sex options just right yet! make it nice and build her confidence and introduce that stuff gradually. BTW I feel like a total dickhead right now and if you choose to go the way your considering early on in the relationship...you might feel the same advice...not yet!!! save it
I had this 'kind of' play buddy- whose played a little (not a lot and not often)
anyway yesterday I sent a text (which I'll get to in a minute)...I should add playbuddy (now ex playbuddy) used to text filth but doesn't really anymore...
anyway, i have an opportunity for a new play buddy but the new opportunity just doesn't do it for me
my body just doesn't respond..and the former playbuddy really does...so I sent a text to him...mr. not very often playmate basically saying straight, I want you to tie me up and work me over..and I only want you to do it..NO REPLY
ok I get the message...crawling under a rock right now)....but it taught me 2 things A. he was totally turned off, of B. he just doesn't like me (I'm thinking B but not sure)
So my advice to your situation would be to NOT go in with the alternative sex options just right yet! make it nice and build her confidence and introduce that stuff gradually. BTW I feel like a total dickhead right now and if you choose to go the way your considering early on in the relationship...you might feel the same
advice...not yet!!! save it
