(first time here so (kid in candy store )) Do any of you relate to sexual humiliation

[Guest]

Yeah, I'm familiar with the "she's-a-whore" fantasy, but why should you need male humiliation for that?

I can get off on that angle in the story you describe (which does sound pretty hot. Something about all those men filing upstairs one after another...) but nothing about the situation of the poor schmuck's who's waiting downstairs does anything for me.

It seems to me it's more similar to F/m D/s, being Dommed by a woman. That kind of play often involves male humiliation and sissification (are those the same things?) The thing that doesn't compute for me is getting off on being told you're a lousy and inadequate lover. I just don't get how that works. I'd appreciate it if someone could explain.

I don't know, it's really hard to explain. I don't know if anyone can explain it. All I know is he gets turned on by the thought of his woman going with other men, and being teased and goaded about it. I don't think it's so much the being told he's a lousy and inadequate lover thing, although he does like to be told she enjoys other men. Maybe you're either wired that way, or you're not. It's much like I can't explain why I like to feel humiliated, and especially in public.

For example, this is an excerpt of the one I wrote last week (it's in letter form, it's written as a confession from me to him, so apologies for the second person form it's currently in - I'm considering re-writing it, to at least first person).

Now, this is the bit that "got" him, if you get me, nudge nudge, wink wink. I asked him why and he couldn't even begin to explain. He just said it's the whole thing about her being used and him being called a "stupid cunt" for allowing it to happen. He said it was all about him and his wishes being ignored and her carrying on, letting them play with her, while all he could do was stand there and watch.

I must admit, this greatly turns me on, too:

--------------------------------------------------------------------

You were then asked to get yet another round in and mumbled some words of complaint. “Louise, I really don’t think you should have any more to drink,” you said.

“Oh, don’t be a party-pooper! I’m fine, get me some drink!”

They all laughed at this and took the piss out of you. You didn’t like it, so you went. When you came back, I was looking rather embarrassed and pulling up the strap of my dress. You noticed my right nipple protruding and pushing at the fabric. The material was wet around my nipple. You glared at the guy on my right and he was smiling broadly.

It was all beginning to get a bit out of hand. They were drinking more and getting rowdier. By this point, I was beginning to have some serious doubts about the whole thing, but I also couldn’t see a way out of it by then, without things turning ugly. I had got all these guys to come here, on the promise of them fucking me. I knew I’d reached the point of no return and couldn’t back out now. So, I drank some more. The drink kind of took over, eventually, and I lost all inhibitions.

You knew I was uncomfortable and said it might be a good idea if we left, but you quickly got shut up by the seven men and their noisy banter.

“Oh, I’m going to the loo,” you said.

On your way back, you heard chanting, “Get ‘em off! Get ‘em off!” so you hurried back to the table, in time to see me, dancing on the table, with my skirt up around my waist and my thumbs hooked into the waistband of my knickers. I bent down and slowly removed them. The guys behind me got a great view of my ass and one of them reached up and gave it a slap.

Another guy, I think his name was Tony – one of the younger, cockier guys – was even bolder. He shouted at one of the guys near my head to hold my head down and keep me bent over. He brought his hand up, rubbed his fingers around my pussy, then forced two inside me. I gasped. “Oooh, she’s up for it lads! Very wet!” he excitedly exclaimed.

“Haha! Look, Jack, he’s fingering your woman. Oh, and she likes it, look at her face,” said another.

“Oooh, what a whore!” goaded another.

“Yeah, look, she’s gagging for it!”

“Go on, Tony, give it to her! Finger-fuck the little bitch, she’s begging for it.” Right then, I pretty much was.

“You stupid cunt, how can you let this happen to your woman?” one of the others asked you.

They all laughed, mocking you.

You didn’t like this and tried to protest, but I glared at you. I was enjoying myself then, in my drunken state, and you were not going to stop me having my fun. By that point, in fact, I was aching to be properly fucked and I didn’t care by who and how many. And I think you realised it.

You were feeling quite uncomfortable, as probably the only relatively sober one of the group and when you noticed the hotel manager approach, you snarled at them to get their hands off me, grabbed me and pulled me down off the table.

“Oooh, baby, you want a go at me first, do you? Well, tough, you’ve gotta get in line! They’ve all drawn straws. Hahaha!” I was off my head and you knew there was little you could do with me.

------------------------------------------------------------------

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Well, that's kind of weird. That was a good scene, and I could get off on the gang-rape aspects of it. I even think I could write a scene like that--even embellishing it so that the guy was forced to hold the other guys' coats while they took turns with her, or was forced to go get some paper napkins so they could wipe off her pussy before the next guy took his turn--but I still can't quite get my mind around the appeal.

The closest I can figure is that (a) it's the acting out of a very deep and primal male fear, and the thrill is in seeing the fear openly expressed in a story, or (b) it's the ultimate absolution from responsibility for sex. The humiliated guy gets to watch his wife get off without having to be responsible for her pleasure. The more he's humiliated, the freer he is.

Don't know if either of these makes sense.

There's a shrink theory that says that humiliation is having our secret desires made public. Female humiliation often involves the woman being forced or tricked into displaying her slutty side, which presumably displays her real, hidden desires. It's hard to see how this would apply to a man in this situation though. Hard to see how being a wimp is his secret desire.

Just out of curiosity, for people who like male humiliation stories like this, is there anything hot about him being impotent? Or is it better if he's aroused but incapable of pleasing the woman?

 

[TheEarl]

Well, that's kind of weird. That was a good scene, and I could get off on the gang-rape aspects of it. I even think I could write a scene like that--even embellishing it so that the guy was forced to hold the other guys' coats while they took turns with her, or was forced to go get some paper napkins so they could wipe off her pussy before the next guy took his turn--but I still can't quite get my mind around the appeal.

The closest I can figure is that (a) it's the acting out of a very deep and primal male fear, and the thrill is in seeing the fear openly expressed in a story, or (b) it's the ultimate absolution from responsibility for sex. The humiliated guy gets to watch his wife get off without having to be responsible for her pleasure. The more he's humiliated, the freer he is.

Don't know if either of these makes sense.

There's a shrink theory that says that humiliation is having our secret desires made public. Female humiliation often involves the woman being forced or tricked into displaying her slutty side, which presumably displays her real, hidden desires. It's hard to see how this would apply to a man in this situation though. Hard to see how being a wimp is his secret desire.

Just out of curiosity, for people who like male humiliation stories like this, is there anything hot about him being impotent? Or is it better if he's aroused but incapable of pleasing the woman?

I'm with you on this Doc. The scene was good and it was sexy, but I was definitely missing the main point. Interested to see if anyone can come up with an answer.

The Earl

 

[sweetnpetite]

Yeah, I'm familiar with the "she's-a-whore" fantasy, but why should you need male humiliation for that?

I can get off on that angle in the story you describe (which does sound pretty hot. Something about all those men filing upstairs one after another...) but nothing about the situation of the poor schmuck's who's waiting downstairs does anything for me.

It seems to me it's more similar to F/m D/s, being Dommed by a woman. That kind of play often involves male humiliation and sissification (are those the same things?) The thing that doesn't compute for me is getting off on being told you're a lousy and inadequate lover. I just don't get how that works. I'd appreciate it if someone could explain.

I think it's an outlet- a way to redirect all the fealings of real life humiliation, or the actual fears of something like this (not being good enough or big enough or whatever)- you channel it by bringing out those feelings [by way of emphasizing them more and more] and all the hurt and anger and pissed off feelings get redirected into sexual energy. Sort of like when a guy gets jelous b/c another guy is giving you to attention and he just can't wait to get you home and prove that you're *his* It's territorial and competative but it's also cathartic. B/c men have few socially acceptable avenues to express most of there emotions.

To me it's sort of like "Why do women like to watch sad movies about people's best friends and mothers dying and just sit there and cry?" B/c it's a *release* but it's done in a ritualized way. The movie puts all the elements in there for you and then pipes up the music and then *whose*!!! you just let it all out.

I think it's sort of like that.

Because in life we have so many things that we just have to take and take and swallow. So we set up a situation where we are handed these things and the opportunity to handle them differently, we take out our emotions in the prescribed manner with someone who is willing to accept them, who in fact enjoys them as well. (even in the movie scenerio- the actors don't really die, they get paid big bucks, everyone get's what they want/need.)

It's a ritual- a *literal* enactment of "I'm not going to take it anymore so fuck you! Tell me again what a fuck up I am while i pound my manhood into you!" But I think it's sort of subconcious, you know sublimation and redirection and all of that.

Dr. Freud.

 

[sweetnpetite]

Sorry for all the posts but I am like a kid in a candy store on this board. I have never come across such a place on the web. So please forgive all my posts.

So ..... do you enjoy sexual humiliation ? I love it. I find it very difficult to convey all the thoughts and feelings on this topic but I would love to have a discussion about this.

I will start by admitting one of my favorite fantasies is to have my wife after another man ( with a bigger cock ) has already had her. After he is done with her she dominates me and the fantasy almost always ends with me licking his cum out of her pussy. Mmmmm..... I love that. Can anyone relate ? Any other similar fantasies or ideas ?

I can barely write anything without humiliation. (Which is bad bc all the paying markets say no humiliation.) I suggest that you read all my stories

Not all my poems are good (some are!) but they are all short!

Some especially humiliating ones for you:
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=185432
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=185432
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=195284
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=156552
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=156552
http://english.literotica.com:81/stories/showstory.php?id=112949
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=114266
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=167464
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=173898

 

[sweetnpetite]

Welcome to the AH. Feel free to post all you want, as it's the only way you'll ever get your questions answered. I must admit that I love the humilation aspect. It's a little wierd for me, but I find it insanely arousing in two aspects.

1: I love to humilate my partner in some way. Just degrading a woman, sexually, can be extremely arousing for me. Knowing that I've reduced her to a primal lusting, animalistic and fucking, just like me, gets me off very quick. I like to know that nothing is taboo and all is accepted. I like to just be a fucking slut, and I like my partner to feel the same way. A lot of things get me off and humilation is one of them.

2: I like to be humilated, in some aspects. I too like the idea of my woman being freshly fucked by a huge cock and I get some sloppy seconds. I want to hear, while I'm fucking her nice open hole, that he was so much bigger than me and such a better fuck. I don't know why, but man...that really gets me going. I also like the idea of two cocks in one pussy. Me and another guy in her pussy. I love that idea of stretching her nice and wide till she takes all the meat that's being put into her.

I have never gotten into eating his cum after he's done with her though. Everything else seems to be about the same. It's just so hard to describe all the sensations going on knowing that I'm a fucking whore fucking an equally dirty whore, who's just been fucked by a bigger whore, and is now telling me that I'm a worthless whore who can't fuck because I'm not big enough. I think that sums it up fairly well.

I like the idea of driving my cock deeper into a fucked hole and trying my best to equal the guy that just filled her. I know I can never do it, but I try all the harder because of it. And I like the feel of a nice stretched pussy.

Time for a cold shower.

 

[The_Fool]

~~~
Oh, I don't really know, to be honest, but I know it's a turn on for me to write about, and I know how much enjoyment he gets from reading them.
~~~

Honey, you're turned on by the fucking wind changing direction....

 

[Dar~]

I enjoy fantasies about being used and humiliated. Something about having multiple men who know they aren't the only one. Pleasuring men in each orafice. It gets me extremely turned on. I often fantisize about leaving a club and being accosted by a group of men and used over the hood of a car. I probably wouldn't like it in reality, but in fantasy it is extremely hot.

 

[rikaaim]

Time for a cold shower.

Now that's another matter entirely.

 

[sun_lover_61]

As for contemplating making humiliation fantasies a reality, I have and I do. But, I'm not going into details about any of that, cos it's personal. Some of my stories already posted here are based on actual events, but I never let on which are and which are completely made up.

Perfect answer to my prying. I blurt things out about my private life like a drunk.

All subsequent posts very interesting. I have an interest in the cuckold thing - but not for ME personally!! I am not sure if that came across in my post. I too am not into the sloppy seconds thing.

I have a written an epic tale of a cuckold fantasy gone wrong. It is a work of pure fiction. The male protaganist has aspects of his personality that are in common with me - but in other ways he is quite different. But God, does he get it bad! He orchestrates a situation where he is married to a younger woman through whom he lives out his most perverse fantasies. Everything goes perfectly to plan - but too perfectly. Those fulfilled fantasies turn out to be a case of him getting what he wants, but not what he needs. Its all a bit moralistic really - which is not to say I didn't get totally turned on thinking about it!

SL61

 

[dr_mabeuse]

I think it's an outlet- a way to redirect all the fealings of real life humiliation, or the actual fears of something like this (not being good enough or big enough or whatever)- you channel it by bringing out those feelings [by way of emphasizing them more and more] and all the hurt and anger and pissed off feelings get redirected into sexual energy. Sort of like when a guy gets jelous b/c another guy is giving you to attention and he just can't wait to get you home and prove that you're *his* It's territorial and competative but it's also cathartic. B/c men have few socially acceptable avenues to express most of there emotions.

I think SnP might be right: it might just be cathartic.

That would explain another side of the phenomenon: the bizarre reactions you see towards Loving (i.e. Cheating) Wives stories, where a lot of male readers seem to get off on spewing anger and scorn on everyone involved: the wife, the cuckolded husband, even the author. You wonder, if these stories upset these guys so much, why do they keep coming back and reading them again and again?

It seems to me that the hateful reaction is part of the thrill. They can watch some guy be emasculated, which provides a kind of catharsis, then they can prove to themselves that they're better than that by working up a good head of contempt for the characters in the story. They get to share his humiliation while imagining they're above such feelings. Kind of like th blue-blood who "hates" porn so much that he can't stop reading it, all the while telling himself how disgusting it is.

 

[oggbashan]

Different Strokes For Different Folks

The variety of human sexual desire is amazing.

What is a complete turn-off for one person may be extremely erotic for another.

I know that most of my work has limited appeal because my target audience is well away from the mainstream. I started writing fetish female domination stories after writing one for a Yahoo group (then a club) and getting a positive response.

Unfortunately I have now become stuck in a rut as a purveyor of erotica to minority tastes. The sweaty hairy armpit aficionados are still waiting - I'll get round to them sometime. My fan base (all three of them) expect more of the same and complain when I divert closer to the normal sexual fantasies.

I can understand the desire for humiliation and degradation just as I understand the various audiences I write for. It doesn't turn me on and I don't share their enthusiasm. Perhaps that explains the detachment in my stories. As a non-believer writing for fanatics I can't produce the real excitement they want. It seems that they can't do it either so are happy with my second-best solution.

Maybe I'll make 2005 the year that Og goes into 'normal' sex. I seem to have tried everything else.

Og

 

[District Line]

I suspect the enjoyment of the Loving Wives fantasy has a Darwinian basis. More specifically, I think it relates of sperm competition.

This is a bit clinical, but anyway.

Until recently it was generally thought that sperm had a simple function: swim as fast as it possible and be the first to fertilize the egg. However, researchers have found that sperm have more complex functions. It's been observed that sperm from one male fight sperm from other males. Sperm can also connect together and form barriers to other sperm.

Also, a fact about about ejaculation has come to light. Generally, the volume of ejaculate produced by a man is pretty constant. However, there's one factor that effects the volume of ejaculate a great deal.

If a man abstains from sex for a period of time, while being away from his wife/girlfriend, the next time he has sex with her, he'll produce a much greater volume of ejaculate. Sometimes, this can be as much three times more ejaculate than it's normal for him. Well, there's not much of a suprise in that. But this is the interesting thing. If a man abstains from sex for a similar period, but all the while being in close proximity to his wife/girlfriend, then the next time he has sex with her, there's no increase in the volume of ejaclulate. That is, the variable that effects the volume of a man's ejaculate is not abstinence itself, but being away from his spouse.

It appears men have evolved to take account of women they're having sex with, having sex with someone else. It appears that Darwinian competition doesn't just happen at the person to person level, but it carries on at the 'spermal level' so to speak. It's reasonable to think that these autonomic behaviours had an evolutionary advantage.

If a man finds out that his wife has had sex with another man, he has some options (I'm leaving the ethics aside). He could seek out the other man and beat him up, and he could be abusive to his wife or do other similar intimidating things. However, that kind of behaviour, at best, could only act as a future deterent. That's not going to help him at that time. The pressing problem for him is that his wife could become pregnant from her adultery. He could do something else. Feeling upset, he could go away for a while and try to work through his anger and jealousy or sulk or whatever. But that's not going to help him either, and time is of the essence.

What he needs to do is take the Darwinian battle to the spermal level so to speak. The best course of action that will help him pass on his genes, or at least hinder his rival from passing on his genes, is, as soon as possible, have sex with his woman, and, to put it crudely, shoot a big load of cum inside her.

Obviously, in order to do this, the man has to get turned-on. Here, I suspect that men have evolved some kind of turn-on mechanism for these situations. It has to be effective and powerful. If a man has got it in his mind that his woman has had sex with another man/other men, or if actual physical evidence is in front of him, it's likely that he will feel jealous, upset, angry, or traumatized. But this arousal mechanism has to overide all that in order that he becomes horny.

I don't know how it works exactly, but I think men are tapping into this mechanism in some way when they are getting off on the Loving Wives fantasies.



[Some researchers in this field - Dr. Robin Baker and Dr. Mark A. Bellis]

 

[impressive]

Yup. Hunter-killer sperm. Saw the Nova special.

 

[Guest]

Dear Tatelou,

This does indeed sound brilliant! So, write , write write!! I have my own take on these things. I like the idea of a cuckold situation going wrong. i.e. Perhaps the would be cuckold brings to realisation his perfect fantasy - only to realise the dangers in it too late. They might be - awakening an unstoppable sexuality - bringing together two soul mates, to his eternal loss - or many other possibilities.

When you talk enthusiastically about humiliation fantasies - do you contemplate making them reality?

SL61

jeez lou yer onna roll--keep us posted

Yeah, I'm familiar with the "she's-a-whore" fantasy, but why should you need male humiliation for that?

I can get off on that angle in the story you describe (which does sound pretty hot. Something about all those men filing upstairs one after another...) but nothing about the situation of the poor schmuck's who's waiting downstairs does anything for me.

It seems to me it's more similar to F/m D/s, being Dommed by a woman. That kind of play often involves male humiliation and sissification (are those the same things?) The thing that doesn't compute for me is getting off on being told you're a lousy and inadequate lover. I just don't get how that works. I'd appreciate it if someone could explain.

Well, I said I'd let everyone know when the party story gets posted, so I am!

The Party went up on the site today. It's in the Loving Wives category, and is very dirty (I purposely wrote it that way - she's not called a slutwife for nothing. )

There's a link in my sig, but here's another: The Party

It's heavy on the humiliation of the guy, but he asked for it. Ok, so maybe she went further than he would have liked, but he enjoyed it all the same. Dirty fuckers!

I've had some great feedback on it already. Seems it flicks the switch of those who are into male humiliation and cuckoldry.

Lou

 

[CharleyH]

I think it's an outlet- a way to redirect all the fealings of real life humiliation, or the actual fears of something like this (not being good enough or big enough or whatever)- you channel it by bringing out those feelings [by way of emphasizing them more and more] and all the hurt and anger and pissed off feelings get redirected into sexual energy. Sort of like when a guy gets jelous b/c another guy is giving you to attention and he just can't wait to get you home and prove that you're *his* It's territorial and competative but it's also cathartic. B/c men have few socially acceptable avenues to express most of there emotions.

I also agree with SnP. I personally do not understand humiliation in any rl sexual scenario, and yet have played it out many times. I don't understand it because it is all artifically constructed in the first place, so how one could possibly feel humiliated in a scenario that is totally bogus, is confusing to me.

It has been my experience that submissive men get a thrill via exactly what SnP points out, and not by the wife/lover what have you, being a slut - sluttishness gives her power in my opinion, in this scenario - power over her own sexuality, which the male cannot control, and power over his. Perhaps an effect of feminism, I do not know.

Of course, I have said this before on similar threads, yet it never ceases to be an interesting discussion.

 

[Pure]

Thanks lou

Yes, I'd say "The Party" is pretty hot. Reads well, and is clearly written. The first person female narrator(N) is a nice change from a standard cuckold story. The endings a bit odd, esp. the women spanking N. Does not seem serious, which means it almost sounds like it's for the N's benefit. It's unusual to have the man punish the woman at the end; again does not seem very harsh. Hypothetically, I would say, let the women be harsher (possibly getting something out of it, themselves), then have them turn upon--i.e., punish-- the man as well, which given his leanings would partly be arousing.

Thanks for sharing. You are definitely moving up the women writers' 'dirt' scale--medium high, but not above middling on the men writers' scale. Keep up the trend, more goo, etc.

 

[Guest]

Yes, I'd say "The Party" is pretty hot. Reads well, and is clearly written. The first person female narrator(N) is a nice change from a standard cuckold story. The endings a bit odd, esp. the women spanking N. Does not seem serious, which means it almost sounds like it's for the N's benefit. It's unusual to have the man punish the woman at the end; again does not seem very harsh. Hypothetically, I would say, let the women be harsher (possibly getting something out of it, themselves), then have them turn upon--i.e., punish-- the man as well, which given his leanings would partly be arousing.

Thanks for sharing. You are definitely moving up the women writers' 'dirt' scale--medium high, but not above middling on the men writers' scale. Keep up the trend, more goo, etc.

Thank you, Pure!

I also think it's pretty hot, but it seems that some don't (or they do, and they are too ashamed of themselves to admit it, so drop a one vote on it). But, I'm pleased with it and had a lot of fun writing it. Very glad to hear you thought it was clearly written.

Yes, you are right, the ending isn't exactly "serious", and not at all plausible (as in it wouldn't happen in real life), but is any of it? Yes, I suppose it is, to a degree, but this story is pretty out there. I actually wrote it with an individual's specific tastes and likings in mind, so that's why the ending might seem a bit "odd" to most.

As for the "dirtiness" scale: I'm getting there. This story is tame, compared to another I wrote recently, which I am currently debating whether or not to actually submit here. I might, but it would go in non-consent, NOT loving wives!

Thanks, again.

Lou