First Munch Tips?

[FurryFury]

You said to watch your toys and stuff while I willingly follow you in deeper, well when I think toys and such I envision some level of pain, maybe I am like Phedre this way but please bring it on. Don't tease and entice me with a possiblity unless your going to follow through with it.

Awww!

Damn!

Would it be teasing and enticing to say that tonight while I teased, spanked, scratched, mouthed and enticed my husband he said I smelled like our new leather furniture?

*purrs*

Fury

 

[leeroy jenkins]

Awww!

Damn!

Would it be teasing and enticing to say that tonight while I teased, spanked, scratched, mouthed and enticed my husband he said I smelled like our new leather furniture?

*purrs*

Fury

So you were doing the teasing?? And what your hubby said is that a good thing or bad thing??

Branding? Wow. You will try some things I would not. At least not without the right person and purpose for me.

Fury

I did talk to a few of the ladies at the munch today and I guess I was branded and that was something I was not going to do. I figured I would leave this to the really sick and demented people out there and then I volunteer unknowningly to let it be done to me. I did decide I want my initials branded into my arm, a simple 8 strikes and it will be done.

 

[FurryFury]

So you were doing the teasing?? And what your hubby said is that a good thing or bad thing??



I did talk to a few of the ladies at the munch today and I guess I was branded and that was something I was not going to do. I figured I would leave this to the really sick and demented people out there and then I volunteer unknowningly to let it be done to me. I did decide I want my initials branded into my arm, a simple 8 strikes and it will be done.

Yes, I was doing the teasing! And it was a GOOD thing for us because we both love leather.

The next demo is on something I am really interested in and I am able to go!!!

Yay!!!

Fury

 

[leeroy jenkins]

Could you be a bit more vague Fury??

Last night was talking about limits. I did learn some stuff, I also like the way the guy thought about limits now as to how most people might view them. The real nice thing about last night was that the guy doing the panel also sells toys.

There was one toy in particular that I really liked, its some sorta of flexable metal, carbon steal??, that you draw back and then snap people with. This toy is smaller diameter then your kids pencil lead, but if snapped on the right area it will raise a small welt and give you a nice stripe to remeber. I let one of the masters try it out on me 3 times... it hurt some, this same master I'm going to play with at our novice play party and he has a Tens unit.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

...

There was one toy in particular that I really liked, its some sorta of flexable metal, carbon steal??, that you draw back and then snap people with. This toy is smaller diameter then your kids pencil lead, but if snapped on the right area it will raise a small welt and give you a nice stripe to remeber. I let one of the masters try it out on me 3 times... it hurt some, this same master I'm going to play with at our novice play party and he has a Tens unit.

Hi Leeroy,

The toy you are describing sounds like an "Evil Stick", which is essentially a graphite rod. VERY sting-y... *grin*

 

[Evil_Geoff]

...
I really want June 17 to roll around so I can do a newbie night and try wax and needle play at the same time at the hands of someone experienced. Then there is beginning rope bondage, violent wands and so forth...

Why wait for June 17th? Drop by my place!

 

[leeroy jenkins]

Why wait for June 17th? Drop by my place!

Perhaps if we could just fold space like in Dune then its not an issue, but I am on one side and you are on the other. I did get promised some painful pleasure with a Tens unit, and seeing there will be like 11 demo in total I am not sure how much function I will have the next day. Lets see needle play, violet wand, add some wax play and flogging, and just a pinch of rope bondage.

But seriously the only real issue I will have is getting back home, our busses don't run 24 hours a day so if I don't have a ride home no play party for me.

 

[eatmebaby]

Help me out here guys, I have no idea what a munch is?

PLease tell me more, it sounds interesting to sayt the least.......

 

[leeroy jenkins]

Help me out here guys, I have no idea what a munch is?

PLease tell me more, it sounds interesting to sayt the least.......

Welcome Eatmebaby, a munch is where a bunch of kinky people meet in a public place like a resturant and talk about stuff. Its a nice way to meet those people in your bdsm community without having to be in a club first.

 

[eatmebaby]

Thanks

Stumbled across this site searching the inet, fantastic site!!!!

I live in a small Australian town & am not sure of some of the terminology used - BDSM?? I still have no idea what that means!

Needless to say I have enjoyed reading the exploits of others and am looking forward to sharing some info & pics.

Im sure theres plenty of people like me around here but being such a small place people tend to keep to themselves.

Whats the best forum to alk dirty on?

 

[leeroy jenkins]

If I have it right BDSM means Bondage and Dicipline, Domination and submission, and sadomasochism. If your looking for a good site to just search out terms and some other info check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Main_Page

 

[leeroy jenkins]

In an attempt to stay out of the house and let it cool down a bit I went to one of the other clubs munches. I would say its a bit more relaxed, its outside at a coffee house. I would also comment on how much its night and day to Apex's munches, there was some talk but bdsm stuff but it was just a small part. Most of the topics discussed were just about everyday life stuff. Its good to have both, but unlike many of the others there my life is really boring so I don't care to talk about it.

 

[FurryFury]

So I went to a munch, demo and play party this weekend. Again I didn't play but I did learn some of what I had hoped to. I just don't think I'm a public play kind of person. I'm glad I went. I accomplished what I wanted to.

I took some of my best buds and they are waaaay more into public play than I am! I'm so glad they had a great time and did so much. Makes me feel a little like a wimp or a kid with her face pressed up against the window's glass but this is what I am and I don't see it changing right away.

One of my buds did keep playing with my skin and hair. She is one of the few people from whom I could tolerate being touched like that in public. It was relatively mild but with her I just feel totally accepted and relaxed. That's very rare for me to feel such things with anyone.

Anyway that is my report.

Fury

 

[DVS]

So I went to a munch, demo and play party this weekend. Again I didn't play but I did learn some of what I had hoped to. I just don't think I'm a public play kind of person. I'm glad I went. I accomplished what I wanted to.

I took some of my best buds and they are waaaay more into public play than I am! I'm so glad they had a great time and did so much. Makes me feel a little like a wimp or a kid with her face pressed up against the window's glass but this is what I am and I don't see it changing right away.

One of my buds did keep playing with my skin and hair. She is one of the few people from whom I could tolerate being touched like that in public. It was relatively mild but with her I just feel totally accepted and relaxed. That's very rare for me to feel such things with anyone.

Anyway that is my report.

Fury

You're doing this all wrong. The trick to getting a reluctant sub to join in on the fun is to have someone bind and gag you BEFORE you go, and just walk you into the place and say (while pointing to you), "she's a willing participant. She wants to join in on the fun." Then, when they look your way, someone shoves you towards the fun.

Trust me...that's a fool proof method. No questions asked. At least not by you.

 

[FurryFury]

You're doing this all wrong. The trick to getting a reluctant sub to join in on the fun is to have someone bind and gag you BEFORE you go, and just walk you into the place and say (while pointing to you), "she's a willing participant. She wants to join in on the fun." Then, when they look your way, someone shoves you towards the fun.

Trust me...that's a fool proof method. No questions asked. At least not by you.

If I knew someone who would do that to me was going to be there I'd not go!

I'm not a public play type of person.

The reason I wanted to do it so bad the first time was because I was so worried about my husband having a good time and I was worried I'd never get to go back.

Fury

 

[vanelane]

Update - finally!

I'll keep you posted. We're having these lovely conversations about collars and leashes and ropes and blindfolds. I'm a bit more exhibitionist than you are. And he has a violet wand and a TENS and multiple, multiple toys.... sigh, I can't wait!

So three months later ..... we finally got to meet this guy *and* attend a play party in the same night! It was kind of a small one, so we didn't get to see as many things as we would have liked, but that made it kind of nice too as we got to have conversations with most everyone there and that made us both more comfortable. Just about the only 'scene' type things were floggings, but my husband didn't have any problem seeing the naked women being whaled on on the St. Andrews Cross. Oh! There was this one sub guy who had chains around his neck and down through his crotch and around his arms; totally naked otherwise. He was holding drinks for his femdom and picking up all her clothes for her etc., but that was about it. After her flogging (switch I guess), she took off his chains and they got in the hot tub.

Anyway, we both got to meet Dom in person and he's a perfectly nice guy. My husband wouldn't say ahead of time whether he'd allow me to play, but by the end of the evening he was willing to let me be tied up. Unfortunately we ran up on a babysitting deadline and had to leave, but next time I will be able to play. *shiver*

 

[Evil_Geoff]

*smiles*

It always tickles me when folks take those first steps... first munch, first demo, first play party. Some dive in and go wild (sub-frenzy, anyone?), others take a relaxed approach, sit back, watch and learn. Some start asking questions, making friends, working their way into the social aspects first.

Whatever approach works for you, it's pretty much all good.

 

[littlegirlslut]

I am also thinking of going to the first "lifestyle" event... a TNG event... there are munches and dinners/coffee hours I could go to but I constantly chicken out... Master says this is something He won't push me into....

UGH - and i have no problems speaking in front of hundreds of people....

 

[Evil_Geoff]

... but I constantly chicken out...
UGH - and i have no problems speaking in front of hundreds of people....

*nods* You are definitely not alone in this "fear of first contact in a public realm".

My question though, is why are you afraid of taking that step?

Fear of being outted? That someone who actually knows you might be there? That friends, family or co-workers might find out you're a perv?

Or fear that if you come out you might come out all the way?

Are you afraid that someone will approach you inappropriately, try to play with you or touch you without permission?

Are you afraid of being rejected? Do you fear opening your mouth and saying something that sounds really noob-ish? Or not being able to say anything at all?

Believe me, whatever fear you have, there will be someone in the group who has experienced it. Someone who's been there, done that, got the wasted time receipts to prove it. What you feel is real, it isn't silly, it's not stupid. It's _okay_ to feel that fear. What's not okay is letting that fear continue to dictate what you do.

If I may make a suggestion? If the group has a mail list, get on it. Introduce yourself there. Make friends with a fellow submissive or two. Meet them for coffee or shopping, or a movie. Do vanilla stuff with them, talke to them about the group, about what to wear, what to expect in the way of behavior or protocols. Get a feel for what it will be like. Then go to the meeting with your new friends.

You will probably still be nervous, but don't let that nervousness make you bolt. Screw your courage up, take those last few steps and go in the door. You will be glad you did, and you will wonder why you fought it so long and hard.

Hope that helps!

 

[littlegirlslut]

*nods* You are definitely not alone in this "fear of first contact in a public realm".

My question though, is why are you afraid of taking that step?

Fear of being outted? That someone who actually knows you might be there? That friends, family or co-workers might find out you're a perv?

Or fear that if you come out you might come out all the way?

Are you afraid that someone will approach you inappropriately, try to play with you or touch you without permission?

Are you afraid of being rejected? Do you fear opening your mouth and saying something that sounds really noob-ish? Or not being able to say anything at all?

Believe me, whatever fear you have, there will be someone in the group who has experienced it. Someone who's been there, done that, got the wasted time receipts to prove it. What you feel is real, it isn't silly, it's not stupid. It's _okay_ to feel that fear. What's not okay is letting that fear continue to dictate what you do.

If I may make a suggestion? If the group has a mail list, get on it. Introduce yourself there. Make friends with a fellow submissive or two. Meet them for coffee or shopping, or a movie. Do vanilla stuff with them, talke to them about the group, about what to wear, what to expect in the way of behavior or protocols. Get a feel for what it will be like. Then go to the meeting with your new friends.

You will probably still be nervous, but don't let that nervousness make you bolt. Screw your courage up, take those last few steps and go in the door. You will be glad you did, and you will wonder why you fought it so long and hard.

Hope that helps!

Thanks this is actually really, really helpful....

 

[FurryFury]

So three months later ..... we finally got to meet this guy *and* attend a play party in the same night! It was kind of a small one, so we didn't get to see as many things as we would have liked, but that made it kind of nice too as we got to have conversations with most everyone there and that made us both more comfortable. Just about the only 'scene' type things were floggings, but my husband didn't have any problem seeing the naked women being whaled on on the St. Andrews Cross. Oh! There was this one sub guy who had chains around his neck and down through his crotch and around his arms; totally naked otherwise. He was holding drinks for his femdom and picking up all her clothes for her etc., but that was about it. After her flogging (switch I guess), she took off his chains and they got in the hot tub.

Anyway, we both got to meet Dom in person and he's a perfectly nice guy. My husband wouldn't say ahead of time whether he'd allow me to play, but by the end of the evening he was willing to let me be tied up. Unfortunately we ran up on a babysitting deadline and had to leave, but next time I will be able to play. *shiver*

It sounds like a great deal of progress was made! I'm so happy for you!

Thanks for taking the time to report back.

*HUGS*

Fury

 

[jlust]

I'll be headed to one of these this week, it should be interesting.

Being around several women who know I am submissive is going to throw my game off just a little bit A few well worded questions could get me hot under the collar, and I'm usually extremely confident around women

 

[FurryFury]

I'll be headed to one of these this week, it should be interesting.

Being around several women who know I am submissive is going to throw my game off just a little bit A few well worded questions could get me hot under the collar, and I'm usually extremely confident around women

Just be yourself and have a good time. In a public place most won't know or ask if you are a sub.

*smiles*

Fury

 

[vanelane]

Update

It sounds like a great deal of progress was made! I'm so happy for you!

Thanks for taking the time to report back.

*HUGS*

Fury

Oooh! Our new friend had to have some back surgery that went bad, so he's been out of commission for awhile, and then the host of these monthly parties had a heart attack so last month's party got cancelled, but everyone's healthy again and I got to get tied up nekkid at the party last night! I've found that I'm more interested in the sensual aspects than the pain, so being bound with expertly tied ropes and a couple of strategically placed bamboo poles was a lot of fun. Can't wait 'til next month.

 

[FurryFury]

Oooh! Our new friend had to have some back surgery that went bad, so he's been out of commission for awhile, and then the host of these monthly parties had a heart attack so last month's party got cancelled, but everyone's healthy again and I got to get tied up nekkid at the party last night! I've found that I'm more interested in the sensual aspects than the pain, so being bound with expertly tied ropes and a couple of strategically placed bamboo poles was a lot of fun. Can't wait 'til next month.

Sounds like you had a great time.

*HUGS*

Good! Thanks for letting us know

Fury