Don't Cry Over Spilt . . .

[Guest]

Thank you for my laugh out loud moment of the day, sweetie!

Same here.

This whole thread is too fuckin' funny. I was reading down through it and all the while waiting for Charley's post, knowing she'd put in an appearance, and she didn't disappoint. You know you love 'em really; they understand you.

RR, thanks for starting this.

 

[R. Richard]

And be cautious...

I think the Raccoons are in on it too.

Q_C

p.s. Shit, one saw me typing this! If I'm not back tomorrow... Well, You know what happened, don't you?

Now wait just a damn minute! I walk through a park frequently and the squirrels and I get along just fine [even when I don't have peanuts]. However, raccoons are different. You mark my words; any animal that wears a mask to go about its normal activities is up to no good!

 

[Guest]

 

[maggot420]

Oh, pfffft, the raccoons are just fall guys. It's the squirrels, I tell you, it's the squirrels!

sometimes we call the squirrels 'lawn bears'...but only the big ones

 

[Guest]

 

[R. Richard]

Oh, pfffft, the raccoons are just fall guys. It's the squirrels, I tell you, it's the squirrels!

The mask thing still bothers me. As for the squirrels, have you tried talking to them? If you are at all interested in trees, they are really quite knowledgeable.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

When the Bloods (Red) and the Crips (Grey) are conducting one of their turf wars in your front yard, there is nothing that a frightened homeowner can do, except cut down the walnut tree in their back yard.

Until you’ve seen an Urban Grey Squirrel with its fur in corn rows, packing a TEK-9, kung fuing a raven into a tatty old feather duster, you don’t know what fear is.

 

[R. Richard]

When the Bloods (Red) and the Crips (Grey) are conducting one of their turf wars in your front yard, there is nothing that a frightened homeowner can do, except cut down the walnut tree in their back yard.

Until you’ve seen an Urban Grey Squirrel with its fur in corn rows, packing a TEK-9, kung fuing a raven into a tatty old feather duster, you don’t know what fear is.

You simply have a lack of understanding here. The Crips were formed in South Central Los Angeles and wear blue do rags. Crips refer to each other as "cuz." The bloods were formed on Piru street, also in South Central Los Angeles and they wear red do rags. Bloods refer to each other as "blood."

Crips avoid using the letter B to start words, as much as practical and Bloods avoid using the letter C start words, as much as practical.

If you encounter a Crip, just say "It ce ["see"] up, cuz!" DON'T TRY THIS IF YOU ARE NOT BLACK! If you encounter a Blood, just say "It be up, blood!" DON'T TRY THIS IF YOU ARE NOT BLACK! The best way to handle the situation, if you are not black, is to wait for either group to say, "It be the white kid." The problem here is that you have to actually be "the white kid."

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Wikipedia can tell me all I need to know about those kind of Crips & Bloods.

What I want to know is what can I do about the wild-eyed Tamiasciurus hudsonicus staggering about on the lawn, chattering obscenities at my cat and reeking of Reeses's Peanut Butter Cups?

 

[R. Richard]

Wikipedia can tell me all I need to know about those kind of Crips & Bloods.

What I want to know is what can I do about the wild-eyed Tamiasciurus hudsonicus staggering about on the lawn, chattering obscenities at my cat and reeking of Reeses's Peanut Butter Cups?

A squirrel staggering about normally has an advanced case of Yersinia pestis. The specific actions you need to take are to immediately notify your local health organizations. Keep your cat [dog, children, SO, self] inside and wait for help. Yersinia pestis is normally rodent borne via fleas, but manifests itself in humans as bubonic plauge.

 

[SeaCat]

They'll also sneak into your house through the dryer vent and nibble your toes while you're sleeping.

SeaCat, you're welcome to visit me and eat whatever you catch!

Now that is an invitation I can live with. Where do you live?

Cat