Do you ever wish you were dead?

[Guest]

I do. I am having a hard time right now in my life. I've been reading the other posts about depression and not sleeping and I just wanted to post. I don't know if anyone can say anything to help. Don't tell me to get help, because I have. I was even hospitalized and had to hide from some guy with schizophrenia who thought I wanted to kill him. I am on meds, I see someone, it isn't helping. My RL friends have their own problems. I wish I were bold enough to post under my lit name, but I'm not.

 

[sexy-girl]

i dont know very much that i can say to help ... other then if your life is like this ... you must seek change ... i know thats not easy always ... but if you seek change it can only be an improvment over your depression try to rebuild things and take control making your life how you want it to be ... contiune seeking proffesional help ... if it doesnt work see someone else ... also talk to your friends perhaps they have problems too but a friend never would turn there back on another friend no matter what there problems are ... perhaps it would bring your friendship closer and your friends would beable to open up to you better too


*hugs* and goodluck i truely wish you well and happyness

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Death is possibly the untimate human experience -

And it should only be experienced in a human, "natural" way.

Why?

If you/me/anyone else - experiences death via an non-natural way - [and there is only one non-natural way - and that's death via ones own human hand] - then "the experience" you see - that ultimate of all human experiences - is "less" of an experience.

The ultimate experience of human death is so important you see - you only get to expereince it once - so considering that - you must make "the best" out of that "one" experience.

And you do that by living your live - until the end - even if it's a bitter end. You have to live as long as is possible for you - in order to wrench everything out of the experience of death.

Taking your own life - fucks up the whole deal.

Believe me - some day - way up the road of your life - you will be glad you heeded this cautionary note.

And then - and only then - after you have lived you life as fully as you possibly can - and pass away "naturally" - will then death will be a wonderful and beautiful thing.

The ultimate human experience.

 

[thumbs2_ca]

Depression is awful and Yes I have been there.
I now look for things to be happy about and positive about. Life really is tough and there is no easy answer except we are here to learn and you would hate to cut that short or miss out on a truly uplifting experience due to depression.
I hope you find that reason to be happy and positive and enjoy life to its fullest

 

[sexy-girl]

i cant believe sparky said something that i agree with and that makes sense and is "spiritual" nice post sparky

 

[Pokerman]

and there is only one non-natural way - and that's death via ones own human hand

So murder is natural? War is natural? Automobile accidents? Plane crashes? Acts of terrorism? All these are natural?

I think you need to refine your definition....


"Don't let the bastard win" - Cpt Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce.....

 

[doctor_insanus]

"Don't let the bastard win" - Cpt Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce.....

That's it! My all-time favorite "death" quote!

Heed those words...

 

[shadowsource]

Depression is normal....

Whenever I think of suicide, I think of all the people I've known who are dead, especially those who committed suicide. What a waste, and I don't just mean that I miss them & feel deprived.

Sad, you need to get exercise & fresh air. It's very difficult when you're that low, but it's a powerful medicine, it's free, and it works. And eat food that strengthens you. Think of your condition as a terrible mental cold....

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Hi.

Please drive to a new town for the day. Buy a hat. Get your hair cut. See a movie you had no intention of ever seeing.

This sounds trite, but I agree with all above that getting out of yourself is that best thing you can do right now.

The one and only time I ever felt truly and awfully depressed (after a break-up) I needed very much to be someone other than me for a couple of months. I grew a beard for the first time. I got me a long trenchcoat and John Lennon hippie hat. I walked though Manahattan neighborhoods I'd never been to before. I avoided family and friends for a long while. I became someone else, and it really gave me the room to put things in cold perspective. I realized that this girl was just a conniving psycho-bitch commie pinko lesbian telemarketer, and I felt much better.

Speaking of telemarketers, go here: http://www.jimflorentine.com/download.htm and play some of the tracks. You will NOT stop laughing. Trust me.

 

[Expertise]

So murder is natural? War is natural? Automobile accidents? Plane crashes? Acts of terrorism? All these are natural?

I think you need to refine your definition....


"Don't let the bastard win" - Cpt Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce.....

Are they UN-natural?? Were their spirits or other worldy forces involved??

I think you need to refine your definition beyond the one that coroners use (death of natural causes).

 

[TygerEyez]

I think you need to refine your definition beyond the one that coroners use (death of natural causes).

*sighs happily* Spoken like a true X-phile. So, Mulder got to you eh, "scully"?

 

[Markov Cain]

Man, I've been clinically dead, been given the last rites, and ordered into a situation that amazed everyone that I lived.

WOULD NEVER VOLUNTARILY OFF MYSELF FOR ANY REASON WHATSOEVER!

Life is too good and too short!

My grandpa the Indian willed himself to die! That's fucked up!

 

[rambling man]

murder, war, whatever, they are all very very natural, they spring from human nature.

Our time comes when our time comes...Sparky's post is the most poignant thing he's posted in a long time. No way to improve on it.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

For me.....

Even though murder, combat, accidental death, death by disease - and all such types of deaths - are not "natural" by most definitions.......

They are all natural to me.

Survival of the fittest - it's a harsh world out there on all us critters and we all can simply get old and "naturally" let are batteries fade down.

Some of us get eaten, some squished by cars, other's fall off cliffs....

The only truly "un-natural" way to die is to take your own life.

I might add - "dumby" - at the end here - I think anyone would know this - but I understand - some people just don't get it.

 

[DarkAngel]

Depends on how much I have had to drink???

Or how little sleep I get.....

Errrrrrrrrr......... Wheres my beer dammit???

 

[Guest]

Sad

Sad,
You don't know me. I've lurked about mostly. But, I wanted to offer an ear that's damn good at receiving venting. Sometimes, you're just not looking for a fix- some good old fashioned empathy may be what's needed. I've been in and out of depression since I was 15, and I've become a damn good Social worker and crisis counselor in the meantime. So....if you ever just wanna verbally vomit or ramble a bit, email me at rainy_grrl@yahoo.com.
In the meantime, hang on.

~Susan

 

[rambling man]

Sad

Thinking about ending your life is one thing. I think most people no matter what have those feelings from time to time.

But depression is just a low cycle in life. Sometimes it seems (and it's real scary) that you will never claw out of it, that you will just lie in bed forever and never meet the day with a smile again. The black moods can overtake you and consume your mind and body.....

But don't give up....

Don't give up because when you feel better, and you will, the world is waitign for you. It's waiting to help you experience something new and wonderful, to accomplish something that makes you feel great....your loved ones are waiting too...

You are in a storm, ride it out sad, things do get better!

 

[Markov Cain]

Where were you guys when Kurt needed you. The good news is Mariah is still alive, so there's a chance to help another suffering soul...

 

[Laurel]

I know you say that you've gotten professional help before, but I think you need to pursue that further.

You're right - nothing we can say can help. Your problem is bigger than anything we or you or your friends/family can solve. You may be taking the meds they gave you, but it sounds like they aren't working. Often with depression, it takes a while to find the right meds to help with your particular problem. You need to go back and tell the doc - you gave me meds, they aren't helping, what's next.

People have a misguided idea of mental issues like depression. They see them as something that can be "talked through", when often the trouble is physiological, chemical. I have a sibling right now who is suffering from schizophrenia, and she's resistant to treatment - and part of that is because her "boyfriend" tells her that HE can "cure" her without medication. lol You wouldn't expect to be "talked through" cancer, or expect hugs to cure a broken leg - you'd want medical treatment. Same with any chronic mental issue. There may be stresses in your life that induced the depression, but from what you've said it sounds like the main problem is chemical.

There's no shame in that, any more than there's shame in asking a doctor to splint your broken leg. The brain is an organ - like your heart, like your liver - and it can misfunction. Thanks to modern science, a lot of problems can be corrected with medication. It's your life. You're an adult. You need to take charge of your body.

There IS hope. It's not your fault, any more than a heart or kidney problem is your fault. But it IS your fault if you don't do everything you can to fix it. Go to the doctor. Get him to prescribe different meds. Get him to recommend a good support group. If those meds don't work after you've taken them for a good amount of time, go back and try again. Be persistent. I know it's hard when you feel like you do, but it's the only way. I know people who suffered from chronic depression who were "cured" by the right meds and support and went on to live VERY happy lives. The difference is night and day.

 

[rambling man]

Sad, I'd like to see Sad on his/her feet again soon

Mariah Carey should be put down and sent to the glue factory

 

[PacificBlue]

I'm sorry your going through a rough time, it's difficult and I have empathy for where you are...I sincerely do. Hang on and when you think you can't, hang on a little while longer. I have so much more that I'd like to say but I think it's more important that you just know that you are not alone. I agree with Laurel...go back to the Dr.'s and tell them your current regimine isn't working....that's what they are there for (the Dr.'s), to help you but they can't if you don't ask. I know it's not easy. Don't give up, the fight and struggle are worth it.

PacificBlue

 

[willfulbrat]

Looks like you've gotten some good advice from some kind people here already. I don't know the answers, but if you just want someone to talk to, I have AIM and MSN.

{{{Sad}}}

 

[Savage Kitten]

Do you ever wish you were dead?

I have, at one time or another. Sometimes I wonder what the point is in living the same life in and out day after day. Sometimes I get physically and emotionally tired. It's so very easy to lose yourself in a downward spiral. But, personally, I can't stand the idea of how badly I would be hurting the people I left behind.

I think everyone toys with the ideal of death at some point in their life. But most people realize that death is not the answer. It's not the missing peice that will solve your puzzle. Death will not make everything better.

Sad, I won't even try to say that I know what you are going through right now, cause I truely don't. But, I do know that you don't really want to die. That you don't want your existance to end. Your post here proves that. There WILL be a brighter tomorrow, I promise. {{{hugz}}}

There's been some great advice here.. try it out and see if it doesn't make you feel a little bit better. And Write.. spill all that stuff that inside your head onto paper. as brutal and as stark as it may be. Write a letter to yourself, put it down in verse, or simply stagger words across the page that mean nothing to anyone but yourself. You never have to share it with anyone, hide it away or burn it if you wish. But what ever you do, don't let your depression eat away at ya.

~Falling Up~

I watch them fall
out of fantasy,
out of love
I've been there before

Spiralling they fall
Eyes full of pain,
hearts full of sorrow
I've been there before

Looking up in awe
I don't try to comfort them,
I couldn't comfort myself
I've been there before

I watch as they continue
their journey downward, past me.
I am falling up
I know, I've been here before

 

[Siren]

Good advice already given

 

[nasty]

I have

Yeah, I've wished to be dead, because my life seems worthless, at times. But, you just gotta try to pull through. Life is worth living. No matter how tough it gets, IT IS!!!!! JUst hang in their.