Distance Domination-Support Thread

[Netzach]

The biggest challenge for me is communicating like a Dom. I was raised up in rural Minnesota and it's next to impossible for me to COMMAND anyone to do something. We've burst out in giggles a few times and lost the sub / dom game because I'd go and issue a strict command but before I knew it I'd end the command with "please".

Be yourself. I'm from NYC and I'm very comfortable with "get it now, bitch" kind of stuff, but that's not everyone.

The guy I switch with was raised in rural MN. His idea of a command is "miss, would you - ?" Polite doesn't necessarily mean you don't mean business. I take his requests with utmost seriousness.

Again, being yourself a hundred times over is better than trying to speak in a voice not your own. You want things from him, simply let him know. Enact consequences if they're not done as you want. Simple enough, really.

 

[Adakgirl]

No worries innerslut. No one dragged me into this. I jumped in of my own free will because I wanted to express my opinion of you. Also, I don't possess the kind of character that will allow my turn my head away or walk on by when I see, hear or read someone talking shit about someone I respect. I already knew that an apology would never be forthcoming from wildone. I didn't expect it when I advised her too.

Let me guess you are here little lap dog that has to suck her ass and lick it to make it clean..
I am more honorable then Mis and you for that matter can be..

Mis thinks she is the shit and that her shit doesn't stink and that what she says is always right..NOT..She is no better then anyone else around here
I have the right to my opinion and you to yours..

Actually you guessed wrong, innerslut does not know me at all. She may have read some of my posts, other than that we are complete strangers. I can assure you that I have never sucked nor licked a woman's ass in my entire life. I did not call you dishonorable, I said I was an honorable woman.

But since you now claim that you are more honorable than both of us, without knowing anything about us at all. I challenge you to prove that to me by posting up any evidence you have that caused you to form your opinion. I agree everyone has a right to an opinion. But you do not have the right to express that opinion when it publicly denounces ,degrades and disrespects a person when you have no valid basis in fact for it.
POst it uo or shut the fuck up.

 

[bobz808]

i am very keen to start a online relationship as a dom, it is something i have thought of doing for ages, i am very inexperienced any any tips would be great, pm's or comments.

if there are any fem subs out there who may be interesting in starting something either pm me or see my add in the bdsm personals

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Let me guess you are here little lap dog that has to suck her ass and lick it to make it clean..

I am more honorable then Mis and you for that matter can be..

Mis thinks she is the shit and that her shit doesn't stink and that what she says is always right..NOT..She is no better then anyone else around here

I have the right to my opinion and you to yours..

I owe no one an apology here..NO one and I do not intend to apologize. I have a right to my opinon as you have a right to yours

Some people have learnt manners though

 

[the captians wench]

I got a full hour and a half on the phone with him yesterday. We've had such little time together lately, I know that's part of all of my stress, but that little bit was enough to calm me and take me to that happy place where I'm in his arms again.

I did make one last attempt to see if I could spend a few days in March (durring my next vacation insted of waiting for may) with him.

I sighed and in my littlest voice pleaded, "Do I really have to wait until May?"

He sighed himself and answered back, "Pretty much," in an almost painful tone.

I always knew it hurt him as much as it does me to have to wait, but I've never heard it quite as vocal as in that little sigh and 2 word reponce. It won't be brought up again, I'll just have to wait the six weeks after my vacation in March. But there's almost a dread to taking a vacation at all when I know I won't spend any of it with him.

 

[myinnerslut]

the distance is getting harder as the exterior stressors add up.

i. want. my. Master. *grumblegrumble*

 

[KayKat]

I got a full hour and a half on the phone with him yesterday. We've had such little time together lately, I know that's part of all of my stress, but that little bit was enough to calm me and take me to that happy place where I'm in his arms again.

I did make one last attempt to see if I could spend a few days in March (durring my next vacation insted of waiting for may) with him.

I sighed and in my littlest voice pleaded, "Do I really have to wait until May?"

He sighed himself and answered back, "Pretty much," in an almost painful tone.

I always knew it hurt him as much as it does me to have to wait, but I've never heard it quite as vocal as in that little sigh and 2 word reponce. It won't be brought up again, I'll just have to wait the six weeks after my vacation in March. But there's almost a dread to taking a vacation at all when I know I won't spend any of it with him.

SO great that you got that time with him Wenchie! I wish you could go out in March like you want..Hopefully the time will fly by and May will be here before you know it..

 

[the captians wench]

SO great that you got that time with him Wenchie! I wish you could go out in March like you want..Hopefully the time will fly by and May will be here before you know it..

Thanks *huggles*

January seems like a distant memory, so maybe the time will fly.

 

[KayKat]

Thanks *huggles*

January seems like a distant memory, so maybe the time will fly.

You are most welcome!

I will keep my fingers and toes crossed for you!

 

[sinnocence]

Let me guess you are here little lap dog that has to suck her ass and lick it to make it clean..

I am more honorable then Mis and you for that matter can be..

Mis thinks she is the shit and that her shit doesn't stink and that what she says is always right..NOT..She is no better then anyone else around here

I have the right to my opinion and you to yours..

I owe no one an apology here..NO one and I do not intend to apologize. I have a right to my opinon as you have a right to yours

Someone needs to get the sand out of their vagina. Damn.


*sigh* Ya'll are so lucky you have had the experience of seeing your PYLs. It's been over a year for me and we've YET to see each other. Grrrr. But that's all gonna change this summer. We're doing a dual visit where he comes here for a week, then I fly back with him to spend another week there. I'm sooooo excited.

 

[myinnerslut]

We're doing a dual visit where he comes here for a week, then I fly back with him to spend another week there. I'm sooooo excited.

thats so cool!

congrats on the plan to see each other! i think id plain go crazy not seeing Master for a year. wow.

 

[sinnocence]

thats so cool!

congrats on the plan to see each other! i think id plain go crazy not seeing Master for a year. wow.

It was His idea of course. But thanks. I'm counting down the days.

 

[the captians wench]

Someone needs to get the sand out of their vagina. Damn.


*sigh* Ya'll are so lucky you have had the experience of seeing your PYLs. It's been over a year for me and we've YET to see each other. Grrrr. But that's all gonna change this summer. We're doing a dual visit where he comes here for a week, then I fly back with him to spend another week there. I'm sooooo excited.

*soft smile* It took 3 years and 2 weeks for me to beable to spend the first moments face to face and in the arms of my Love. I remember the time feeling unbearable. I remember the doubts that creeped in, into both of our minds. The doubts that the day would ever come when I could kiss his lips and fall asleep in his imbrace. It felt, many times, like that day would never come.

I believe the time was good for us though. I believe that we needed that significant amount. I was young and egar, and still knew little about being on my own. And he was happy in many ways in his singlehood. But there's a bond there unlike any I've felt before.

I remember walking out of customs and into the large lobby of Dublin Airport. I looked up, looking for him, but at the same time unsure. Part of me wondered if I would even know him if I saw him. I waited for what felt like a lifetime for the fear to come, the nervous tention of being in a strange place with strange people, out of any element I was familure with. I waited for the panic to hit, to over come me, for the instint to curl up into a ball and hide to over whelm me, but it never came. None of the fear came. I felt like I was home, comfortable like I was returning from a short trip rather than visiting for the first time. And then came the voice. That familure warm voice calling my name with a slight uncertainty. I looked up and there he was, right infront of me.

Every faint memory of how I had imagined this moment was gone. The nervousness I expected in one never came, nor did the awkwardness that I was so certian would ruin that first moment. I curshed into him and thought only about how happy I was to finally be home. I felt so at ease that I didn't even notice he kept his promise to me and kissed me on first sight as he had told me he would so many many times. It didn't feel like a first kiss, again it felt warm and familure, like I had done this all of my life. Every one of our first moments felt like something familure and comfortable, rather than that awkward stubling of new romance and first dates. Everything about him felt like home.

I know the short months between that October morning I had to leave and our reunion set for May does not even come close to the time we had to endure before that first meeting, but in some ways, some moments, it seems much longer.

*soft sigh* I know my time is drawing closer with every breath I take, but I can't help wishing it were sooner. Part of me ponders the idea of going against his wishes and hopping a plane in March just to spend a few days with him, but I know how much it would hurt him if he couldn't take care of me properly while I was there. Or worse yet, if it ment that I would have to cut my trip in May short.

I know it's hard, I have to keep telling myself the same thing, but try to enjoy this time. Often comunication is easier with the safety of distance. I think that's a large part of why Jounar and I have lasted longer than any relationship either one of us have had before. We communicate so freely, no reserve, no hesitation. Every thought I have is his the instant after I think it. Be it good, bad, hurtful or hearwarming, it's shared.

 

[minx1]

*soft smile* It took 3 years and 2 weeks for me to beable to spend the first moments face to face and in the arms of my Love. I remember the time feeling unbearable. I remember the doubts that creeped in, into both of our minds. The doubts that the day would ever come when I could kiss his lips and fall asleep in his imbrace. It felt, many times, like that day would never come.

I believe the time was good for us though. I believe that we needed that significant amount. I was young and egar, and still knew little about being on my own. And he was happy in many ways in his singlehood. But there's a bond there unlike any I've felt before.

I remember walking out of customs and into the large lobby of Dublin Airport. I looked up, looking for him, but at the same time unsure. Part of me wondered if I would even know him if I saw him. I waited for what felt like a lifetime for the fear to come, the nervous tention of being in a strange place with strange people, out of any element I was familure with. I waited for the panic to hit, to over come me, for the instint to curl up into a ball and hide to over whelm me, but it never came. None of the fear came. I felt like I was home, comfortable like I was returning from a short trip rather than visiting for the first time. And then came the voice. That familure warm voice calling my name with a slight uncertainty. I looked up and there he was, right infront of me.

Every faint memory of how I had imagined this moment was gone. The nervousness I expected in one never came, nor did the awkwardness that I was so certian would ruin that first moment. I curshed into him and thought only about how happy I was to finally be home. I felt so at ease that I didn't even notice he kept his promise to me and kissed me on first sight as he had told me he would so many many times. It didn't feel like a first kiss, again it felt warm and familure, like I had done this all of my life. Every one of our first moments felt like something familure and comfortable, rather than that awkward stubling of new romance and first dates. Everything about him felt like home.

so glad its worked out for you chick.hope you get to see him real soon.

Spend your time off in March planning and preparing and getting ready. It will add to the excitement.

This reminds me so much of meeting my D.

Beautiful, Wenchie. You made me cry.

Damn....I can't be here at the moment. so many reminders. Too hard

 

[NALA CAYENNE]

I'm right there with you, sinnocence. Master and I have plans to see each other the end of April but then its still going to be another year before I am with him permanently and the longing I have to be home, in his arms, is excrutiatingly painful.

I have to say that he is great though. He takes every opportunity to make it seem like we are together: we have movie nights where we watch the same movie together and text each other, I wait up for him to get home if he has to work late, we nap at the same time, go to bed at the same time and if he has to get up and I don't, I still get up to be his first morning hello.

If we didn't have this and phone calls and text messaging, I'd go crazy. It's bad enough that I get depressed with all he does to remind me where my home is, I can't imagine how much worse I'd be if I didn't have this with him.

Someone needs to get the sand out of their vagina. Damn.


*sigh* Ya'll are so lucky you have had the experience of seeing your PYLs. It's been over a year for me and we've YET to see each other. Grrrr. But that's all gonna change this summer. We're doing a dual visit where he comes here for a week, then I fly back with him to spend another week there. I'm sooooo excited.

 

[sinnocence]

*soft smile* It took 3 years and 2 weeks for me to beable to spend the first moments face to face and in the arms of my Love. I remember the time feeling unbearable. I remember the doubts that creeped in, into both of our minds. The doubts that the day would ever come when I could kiss his lips and fall asleep in his imbrace. It felt, many times, like that day would never come.

I believe the time was good for us though. I believe that we needed that significant amount. I was young and egar, and still knew little about being on my own. And he was happy in many ways in his singlehood. But there's a bond there unlike any I've felt before.

I remember walking out of customs and into the large lobby of Dublin Airport. I looked up, looking for him, but at the same time unsure. Part of me wondered if I would even know him if I saw him. I waited for what felt like a lifetime for the fear to come, the nervous tention of being in a strange place with strange people, out of any element I was familure with. I waited for the panic to hit, to over come me, for the instint to curl up into a ball and hide to over whelm me, but it never came. None of the fear came. I felt like I was home, comfortable like I was returning from a short trip rather than visiting for the first time. And then came the voice. That familure warm voice calling my name with a slight uncertainty. I looked up and there he was, right infront of me.

Every faint memory of how I had imagined this moment was gone. The nervousness I expected in one never came, nor did the awkwardness that I was so certian would ruin that first moment. I curshed into him and thought only about how happy I was to finally be home. I felt so at ease that I didn't even notice he kept his promise to me and kissed me on first sight as he had told me he would so many many times. It didn't feel like a first kiss, again it felt warm and familure, like I had done this all of my life. Every one of our first moments felt like something familure and comfortable, rather than that awkward stubling of new romance and first dates. Everything about him felt like home.

I know the short months between that October morning I had to leave and our reunion set for May does not even come close to the time we had to endure before that first meeting, but in some ways, some moments, it seems much longer.

*soft sigh* I know my time is drawing closer with every breath I take, but I can't help wishing it were sooner. Part of me ponders the idea of going against his wishes and hopping a plane in March just to spend a few days with him, but I know how much it would hurt him if he couldn't take care of me properly while I was there. Or worse yet, if it ment that I would have to cut my trip in May short.

I know it's hard, I have to keep telling myself the same thing, but try to enjoy this time. Often comunication is easier with the safety of distance. I think that's a large part of why Jounar and I have lasted longer than any relationship either one of us have had before. We communicate so freely, no reserve, no hesitation. Every thought I have is his the instant after I think it. Be it good, bad, hurtful or hearwarming, it's shared.

Thank you so much for sharing that. ^__^ It was beautiful.

I'm sure that our first meeting will be something like that. Lord knows I've thought about it countless times. But I get this feeling that makes my stomach get all fluttery when I think of just *being* with Him. I know it'll be worth the wait...just wish the wait wasn't so darn long.

 

[sinnocence]

I'm right there with you, sinnocence. Master and I have plans to see each other the end of April but then its still going to be another year before I am with him permanently and the longing I have to be home, in his arms, is excrutiatingly painful.

I have to say that he is great though. He takes every opportunity to make it seem like we are together: we have movie nights where we watch the same movie together and text each other, I wait up for him to get home if he has to work late, we nap at the same time, go to bed at the same time and if he has to get up and I don't, I still get up to be his first morning hello.

If we didn't have this and phone calls and text messaging, I'd go crazy. It's bad enough that I get depressed with all he does to remind me where my home is, I can't imagine how much worse I'd be if I didn't have this with him.

It will be a while too until I can be with Him permanently. *mutters* Darn college. But we both understand that I have to do what I need to do before any big plans are made. I just want to be with Him already. And it is painful like you said. I'm glad you get to see your Master in April though.

And mine too does all that He can to try and make the distance a little more bearable. We talk constantly, whether it's texting, IMing, talking on the phone, etc. We're always in touch and it makes it easier, yet at the same time, it makes it harder. You're constantly reminded of how wonderful they are and how much you love them and wish to be with them. But the movie night is a great idea. I like that.

Believe me, I'd go crazy too if we couldn't talk nearly as much as we do now.

 

[missy_me]

I'm taking a bit of a head start here, as I won't be in LDR until the beginning of March. I've been reading this thread and all the stories and support shared here make me feel a lot better about what's coming to my way soon.

My situation is different than that of many of you, because J and I have been living together for the past year. I originally moved to another country to be with him, after that he moved to another country with me because of my work, and now he is moving yet again. It's going to be very difficult to adjust to not seeing every day, not waking up next to him, not making him his morning coffee with my secret recipe. J got an incredible work offer and I won't let him NOT take it, and he wouldn't want me to quit my job either, so here we are, soon in a LDR once again.

I'd be happy to quit my job and move with him right away, but he doesn't let me. Not while the world economy is what it is, but I certainly will start looking for a job in the same country with him. I just know it will be awfully lonely here once he's gone. *sigh*

 

[the captians wench]

so glad its worked out for you chick.hope you get to see him real soon.

Spend your time off in March planning and preparing and getting ready. It will add to the excitement.

This reminds me so much of meeting my D.

Beautiful, Wenchie. You made me cry.

Damn....I can't be here at the moment. so many reminders. Too hard

Me too. I don't think I could be happier. Just like everything else that has happened in our relationship, when it's right, it will happen.

I thought about starting my packing while I'm on vacation in March, then I realized I barely unpacked from the first trip. I will be getting my hair done that week tho. I've decided to keep the length, but I'm going for the curls.

*huggles*

Thank you so much for sharing that. ^__^ It was beautiful.

I'm sure that our first meeting will be something like that. Lord knows I've thought about it countless times. But I get this feeling that makes my stomach get all fluttery when I think of just *being* with Him. I know it'll be worth the wait...just wish the wait wasn't so darn long.

It was kind of odd to both of us how much it didn't feel awkward. It took us both by surprise really. But it was a very welcome feeling.

I know it's hard, but try not to think too much about how it will be. It's sort of like imagining your christmas gifts. If you get too clear a picture of what's under the tree then no matter how wonderful your gifts are, if they aren't how you pictured it, there's going to be a slight disapointment. I worked very hard to not expect anything. So much so that when he asked me what I was expecting I didn't know how to answer him.

 

[kittenartist]

I'm taking a bit of a head start here, as I won't be in LDR until the beginning of March. I've been reading this thread and all the stories and support shared here make me feel a lot better about what's coming to my way soon.

My situation is different than that of many of you, because J and I have been living together for the past year. I originally moved to another country to be with him, after that he moved to another country with me because of my work, and now he is moving yet again. It's going to be very difficult to adjust to not seeing every day, not waking up next to him, not making him his morning coffee with my secret recipe. J got an incredible work offer and I won't let him NOT take it, and he wouldn't want me to quit my job either, so here we are, soon in a LDR once again.

I'd be happy to quit my job and move with him right away, but he doesn't let me. Not while the world economy is what it is, but I certainly will start looking for a job in the same country with him. I just know it will be awfully lonely here once he's gone. *sigh*

Our situation is kind of like that too. We started off long distance. Then he moved to be with me and we lived together for awhile. Then work made him have to leave and we went back to long distance. This time overseas. It is hard to go from living together to being apart. But, like you, I could not have him not go -- he needed to do this job thing. The next step is our marriage so I can go live with him this time.

 

[NALA CAYENNE]

I understand completely! We talk on the phone every day, bare minimum of two times a day and I thank the person that created unlimited text messaging because there are days that I have to clear the text messages from my phone because I've reached my limit- we must have between 80-100 text messages a day because we text all day long some days it is unbearably painful to get off the phone at the end of the day but I am glad that we can spend so much time together.

Movie time is definitely cool and I'm so happy that he sets aside that time for me. He also suggested for us to do the same type of thing with books because we both like to read and have the same taste in books.

It will be a while too until I can be with Him permanently. *mutters* Darn college. But we both understand that I have to do what I need to do before any big plans are made. I just want to be with Him already. And it is painful like you said. I'm glad you get to see your Master in April though.

And mine too does all that He can to try and make the distance a little more bearable. We talk constantly, whether it's texting, IMing, talking on the phone, etc. We're always in touch and it makes it easier, yet at the same time, it makes it harder. You're constantly reminded of how wonderful they are and how much you love them and wish to be with them. But the movie night is a great idea. I like that.

Believe me, I'd go crazy too if we couldn't talk nearly as much as we do now.

 

[the captians wench]

I understand completely! We talk on the phone every day, bare minimum of two times a day and I thank the person that created unlimited text messaging because there are days that I have to clear the text messages from my phone because I've reached my limit- we must have between 80-100 text messages a day because we text all day long some days it is unbearably painful to get off the phone at the end of the day but I am glad that we can spend so much time together.

Movie time is definitely cool and I'm so happy that he sets aside that time for me. He also suggested for us to do the same type of thing with books because we both like to read and have the same taste in books.

This I envy. I have yet to find a plan that encludes Ireland, and the mobile companies there are even more expencive. We do endulge from time to time, usually not going over $10 on my end (roughly 50 messages) in a month but it's spaced out. I buy phone cards so that I can call him more cheaply than if I used my phone straight, but even that has limits, usually only 20 to 30 minutes at a time. *sigh*

I'm very thankful for the IM feature on my phone. He can IM with me not costing him anything, and I just pull from my monthly text pool. IM is our main source of comunication for this reason. I know it's best, but it does limit the amount of time I get with him so I'm always a bit envious of those who can chat so freely.

 

[Daddy2mylilgirl]

This I envy. I have yet to find a plan that encludes Ireland, and the mobile companies there are even more expencive. We do endulge from time to time, usually not going over $10 on my end (roughly 50 messages) in a month but it's spaced out. I buy phone cards so that I can call him more cheaply than if I used my phone straight, but even that has limits, usually only 20 to 30 minutes at a time. *sigh*

I'm very thankful for the IM feature on my phone. He can IM with me not costing him anything, and I just pull from my monthly text pool. IM is our main source of comunication for this reason. I know it's best, but it does limit the amount of time I get with him so I'm always a bit envious of those who can chat so freely.

You could try Vonage. It uses your internet connection as the phone line. Its only $30 a month and its free to call Ireland.

My brother and his wife have it because she is from Ireland.

 

[the captians wench]

You could try Vonage. It uses your internet connection as the phone line. Its only $30 a month and its free to call Ireland.

My brother and his wife have it because she is from Ireland.

I thought about that, but it's just impractical for me really. As it is, I spend $30 on a phone card and it lasts me between 4-7 months depending on our schedules and how much time we actually get to talk. If I remember correctly, I could get a phone number with Vontage that was from Ireland...tho I could be mistaken. But still, it would be a home number and there for I'd have to be home when he called and we'd still be in the same spot.

It's just something I've come to accept. We can't spend the time on the phone that I'd like. So I focas hard on making sure I save enough to beable to visit him like I plan. Tho I'm still hoping to break it up a bit next year. I think spending one week at a time and getting to see him 4 times would be easier than spending 2 weeks at a time and only seeing him twice. Tho much more expencive, which is his worry. He says it's a lot of money to spend for a short period, I say it depends on why your going. Of course he always wins the debate so it's just a matter of waiting to see what he says when it comes time to put my vacation requests in.

ETA: When I spoke of only 20-30 minutes at a time I ment that as a time limit as it pertains to our schedule, not the phone cards I buy. The phone cards I buy I get nearly 700 minutes for $30. We just very rarely get more than 30 minutes to talk as I usually call him on my way to work. I know he's usually home by that time.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I don't know what server you are on but on AOL they have instant messaging so you can talk one to one or even make a private room to talk to one another for free.