Did Jesus have a Bar Mitzvah???

[FlamingoBlue]

Well, now that we are becomming theologians, and all, I thought I would pose this question.

And what's a nice Jewish boy doing with a name like Jesus, anyways?


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[FlamingoBlue]

So where's a guy like Felix ....

when you need him??? What's a matter, folks? You won't go to hell if you answer my question. I guarantee it because there is no hell. The Christians made it up to scare you.

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[ShyGuy68]

Honestly.

It's been around 2000 years ago he lived, so who care if he had a bar mitzvah or not??

 

[Flagg]

Admittedly it may be a small, tedious and rather pointless (you'll see the irony of what I did there in a sec) one but you seem to have missed the point there oh timid one.

 

[Canucklehead922]

Most likely he did. Remember, Jesus was born a Jew; and as far as I know, he didn't start teaching and performing miracles until he was thirty or so. In fact, (and ignoring the part about "God's Son"), Jesus was simply a Jew who said something to the effect of, "Gee, this thing we have here with our Covenant and all is real cosy, but why don't we open it to the Gentilles too?"

 

[RemovedByRequest]

According to some texts, Jesus was named Joshua barr Joseph. meaning that as Joshua son of Joseph. And all that "Jesus" is is the Latin translation for the name given to him by his deciples. Which I do not know in Hebrew. As for the original question, in my opinion which doesn't reakly count for much with this subject, Christ most likly did not experiance what we know today as a bar mitzvah. Though that would really be for a Rabbi to determine and I don't think too many of them frequent Literotica. We may never get an answer here.....

 

[FlamingoBlue]

And I was totally serious...

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[RemovedByRequest]

Oh yeah!

Okay then, yes, he did, and I heard Adam Sandler and Kyle Brovslovski sang "The Huki Lau" at the lord's request.

 

[FlamingoBlue]

Kyle who? By the way, its sacrelege to sing the huki lau at a Bar Mitzvah. Have you no shame???

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[insideShiraz]

Jesus...

When Jesus was here during the tellings of his being here, he did what was required at that time by Hebrew tradition. Why wouldn't he fart in front of his brothers to make them laugh, as well? Would he visit Literotica to see wild sex? If you have ever read the Bible, you'll see he was called a Drunkard and a Glutton because the religious people of his era considered him to be not of them. So fuck them, those sons of snakes.

insideShiraz

 

[Deborah]

Jesus fucking Christ insideShiraz, I have read your posts this morning, and I don't have a clue what in the hell you are talking about.

Blondandbare was very close on the name Jesus. But not Latin. Transliteration of the Hebrew Joshua to Greek which means 'Jehovah is salvation' or 'is the Saviour.'

Jesus was the ultimate Bar Mitzvah, which means 'son of the commandment' with 'Bar' meaning 'son' and 'Mitzvah' meaning 'commandment.' In the case of a female, it's Bat Mitzvah, 'Bat' meaning daughter.

A Jewish male automatically becomes a Bar Mitzvah at age 13, elaborate ceremony or no. The ceremony is a recent development that is not required. The ceremony is essentially, in my opinion, just one more example of commercialization of religion.

Bar Mitzvah simply put is the age when a Jewish male is to be held responsible for his actions, specifically to obey the commandments.

You asked, I answered. Just call be a rabbit, 'er I mean rabbi.

 

[Fox]

Have to agree with those here who say that Jesus was a Jew of his time, and that, as such a person, he fulfilled those obligations that the Law described. most likely, there was something resembling a Bar Mitzvah at the time. However, in the event that the ceremony of the Bar Mitzvah is a more modern invention,the time would have come when Jesus would have read from the Torah scroll in the synagogue for teh first time, just as they still do today, which may make it more of a recognition before the members of the congregation that So and SO, son of whomever is now an adult in the eyes of God.

As to his name, Deborah's got it! Jeshua Minazareth, Hamashiach!

Shalom!

Fox

 

[RemovedByRequest]

Kyle is the little Jewish boy on South Park. And the huki lau was at Christs request so how could it be a sacrelig. What if all heaven is is one big huki lau? As for translating and such, I'm no expert so I thank those of you who cleared that all up...i appriciate the knowledge. Now I'd like to know the Hebrew translation for the huki lau.



Are we going to the huki lau

The huki, huki, huki, huki, huki, huki lau

Are we going to the huki lau

The huki, huki, huki, huki, huki, huki lau

We'll throw our nets out into the sea

for all the umaguma to come laughing with me

Are we going to the huki lau

The huki, huki, huki,huki,huki, huki lau...

[Edited by Blondandbare on 09-02-2000 at 11:40 AM]

 

[insideShiraz]

Kyle believes in...

Howdy-Ho...

I was earlier referring that although christians believe Jesus to be the son of God, he WAS Jewish and understood and practised such said beliefs better than anyone, but still took time out to gross the other sons of Joseph out for a laugh. He was definately human and took time to LOL. (But I still think it's funny that I wasn't making too much fucking sense to many)

insideShiraz

 

[Bliss]

Sit down, KID!

Mr. Hankey says Hiiiiiiiideeeeeeeeeeeey Ho, not Howdy-Ho.


Cheyenne is right, today is in the Twilight Zone. Somebody make Bella stop yelling the words to "Turning Japanese".

And Senor Blue,
Hell or the belief that Hell exists, predates your scary scary Christians (yours, not mine) by many a moon. I say tomato, you say tomahto.

 

[insideShiraz]

Hidy-Ho

That's what I say, too. But everyone keeps telling me that Mr. Hankey says otherwise.

insideShiraz