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DGO's New Unthread!

done_got_old said:
I think I changed the joke, but I don't remember what was there before. All jokes aren't funny to all people and since it was my thread and I didn't ask for her opinion, she should have kept her mouth shut.

Let me see if I can find the joke.
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I can agree.
 
done_got_old said:
Good morning!:kiss:

I stopped using my to do list......and nothing got done.
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I used to use lists for shopping, household needs and wants. Always wrote them out. And always lost them or forgot to bring them to The store. I stopped using lists then. They always made fun of me for it anyway
 
SassyKatz71 said:
I used to use lists for shopping, household needs and wants. Always wrote them out. And always lost them or forgot to bring them to The store. I stopped using lists then. They always made fun of me for it anyway
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Right after I retired I was struck by depression. I recognized the signs and started my lists. Every morning, I'd check off each task as I completed it.

I always made a grocery list. Even when I forgot it, I remembered most of what I needed. A local store offers online ordering and I've been ordering my groceries since about 1996. In fact I have an order coming today. I forgot about Thanksgiving when I did my last order, so I wanted a duck. It turns out to be a $120 duck. Who says you can't impulse buy shopping online?
 
done_got_old said:
Right after I retired I was struck by depression. I recognized the signs and started my lists. Every morning, I'd check off each task as I completed it.

I always made a grocery list. Even when I forgot it, I remembered most of what I needed. A local store offers online ordering and I've been ordering my groceries since about 1996. In fact I have an order coming today. I forgot about Thanksgiving when I did my last order, so I wanted a duck. It turns out to be a $120 duck. Who says you can't impulse buy shopping online?
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Last time I Impulse bought it cost me $458.00 bucks. After arguing with myself over buying it. Now a days I'm more conscious lol
 
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A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again. She put an ad in the local newspaper that read: "Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person."

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

"You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?" the widow asked: "Just look at you -- you have no legs!"

The old gent smiled: "Therefore, I cannot run around on you!"

"You don't have any arms either!" she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: "Therefore, I can never beat you!"


She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: "Are you still good in bed?"

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"
 
Happy Thanksgiving :)
Hope you have Family and Friends to celebrate it with;)
 
After Daylight Savings Time ended I stopped in to visit my dyslexic friend. He was busy covering his penis with black shoe polish. I said to him, "You idiot! You're supposed to turn your clock back!
 
"All I Need to Know about Life I Learned From a Snowman....

  • It's okay if you're a little bottom heavy.
  • Hold your ground, even when the heat is on.
  • Wearing white is always appropriate.
  • Winter is the best of the four seasons.
  • It takes a few extra rolls to make a good midsection.
  • There's nothing better than a foul weather friend.
  • We're all made up of mostly water.
  • You know you've made it when they write a song about you.
  • Accessorize! Accessorize! Accessorize!
  • Avoid yellow snow.
  • Don't get too much sun.
  • It's embarrassing when you can't look down and see your feet.
  • It's fun to hang out in your front yard.
  • Always put your best foot forward.
  • There's no stopping you once you're on a roll.
 
I love the teddy bear. It reminds me of myself; a little worn in places, but still cuddly.

Enjoy your day!:heart::heart::heart:
 
imhere_4fun said:
Hi DGO. How are things?
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I won't complain because I've seen worse days. I feel like an idiot when I complain because there are people who are going through really tough times. My biggest problem today was trying to heat seal this gold glitter. It didn't work, so I have a choice of embossing powder, glue or nothing. See, it's not really a problem.
 
I guess if that's the worst today it's been an okay day. You are right there are people going through some tough things. We all have those, hopefully we're are stronger for having endured them.
 
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imhere_4fun said:
I guess if that's the worst today it's been an okay day. You are right there are people going through some stuff things. We all have those, hopefully we're are stronger for having endured them.
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Be nice to everyone because we're all fighting some kind of battle.
 
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