Dear X

[TongueLust]

Dear Neighbor. I would really like to get to know you. You're smart and have a great sense of humor. And I think we could be great friends.

Get yourself one of these.

 

[Luv2LickSweets]

Dear Bot / Newbie / Phishing Scam,

Thank you for the PM. It was totally unexpected, but I cannot possibility respond to your inquiry and start a deeper conversation based off your zero posts and no information on the "about" section of your account details.

Oh, but I just noticed that your user name includes one of the following: "hot", "sexy" or "bad". You are very interesting to me now. What do you want to know?

 

[Wand3rlust]

Dear Travel Man,

I AM fucking hilarious. But over laughing sycophantically at everything I say, does not have the effect I think you think it does.

See also - letting me do what I want while following me around, failing to make decisions, and generally being moist.

Ugh.

Beach Babe...

 

[LaisDeMarieDeFrance]

Dear lovely lady parts,
You need to calm the f down!
Much love,
Your other brain

 

[JustAnotherFlower]

Dear lovely lady parts,
You need to calm the f down!
Much love,
Your other brain

Dearest other brain,
There's a sale on rechargeable monster dildos on Amazon. Waterproof. Long life span. Textured. They. Fucking. Glow.
We must have. Nows.

Much more love,
Lovely lady parts

 

[LaisDeMarieDeFrance]

Dearest other brain,
There's a sale on rechargeable monster dildos on Amazon. Waterproof. Long life span. Textured. They. Fucking. Glow.
We must have. Nows.

Much more love,
Lovely lady parts

You woke up and decided to be a hero today!

 

[JustAnotherFlower]

You woke up and decided to be a hero today!

I am in a haze, at best right now. But I can always brave the wilds of Monster Vibes for you.

 

[LaisDeMarieDeFrance]

I am in a haze, at best right now. But I can always brave the wilds of Monster Vibes for you.

I bow with deepest respect!

 

[Chillygirl]

Dear X,

I was cleaning out my inbox and couldn’t stop myself from reading our last chain of messages. You got me to watch all the college bowl games. We were talking like good friends again. And then you made the usual promises and ghosted. I still can’t bring myself to delete the messages.

~I just need some back road therapy

 

[Wand3rlust]

Dear X

Fucking hell, you're an ignorant twat. Just when I think your level of stupidity cannot get any higher, you say 'hold my beer'. The things you do and say have consequences beyond which your limited iq cannot fathom. I hope karma bites your arse soon, and bites it hard. I worry it may be too late for everyone else affected.

Do us all a favour and shut the fuck up.

Yours never

Me

 

[Cruel_summer]

Dear X,

Thank you for continuing to show me I’m not a priority. You care when you need validation.

I’m over it,
Me

 

[Taegul]

Dear X,

You're my least favorite letter in the ABC threads. Fuck you.

Signed,
Not a fan

 

[MidwestPrincess23]

Dear Me,

Your application for “being a priority” has been reviewed and APPROVED. Your benefits include: attention, validation, excessive affection, and ME reminding you that you’re pretty damn awesome.

Please stop being sad immediately. This has been your official notice.

Signed,
the one and only mwp

xoxoxo

 

[MidwestPrincess23]

Dear Not a Fan,

Well damn. I thought we really connected over gravy… turns out I was wrong

Signed,
Confused & slightly lumpy

 

[AllAmericanMale]

Dear fellow Go-fur,

Always be confident about your own worth. Guard your thoughts carefully and don't let wayward ideas creep in. Priority is a synonym for time, if someone doesn't value your's, spend it on someone who deserves it.

Just my humble opinion.

Sincerely,
-AAM

 

[LostGirlTink]

Dear friends
I’ve missed you. I am not back but I did want to stop in and say hi
Tink

 

[barefootgirl69]

Dear friends
I’ve missed you. I am not back but I did want to stop in and say hi
Tink

I'm glad you did. I hope things are going well with you!

 

[PandaLover00]

Dear my RL friends,
Thank you for being there for me.
It may not seem much to you all, it's meant a lot to me.

Sincerely,
Somebody who's been going through it silently