Dear X

[Thomasoir]

Dear X

Please don't start anything.

me

 

[brummiesteve]

Dear You Know Who



Brummie

 

[TallHotChick]

Dear X
I'm sick of you and your stupid mind games.

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

Dear You Know Who



Brummie

awww fanks

 

[pedicur8her]

Dear Toll-Free Caller,

Please cease and desist calling my house at 9:00am each morning.

If you are too stupid to understand and follow the clear, English directions on my answering machine, then you deserve the same answer: none. Refusing to leave a message is not the way to get results either.

Anyhow it's your dime, so I'll just keep the ringer turned down.

Here's to your phone bill,

Pedicur8her ...

 

[pedicur8her]

Dear Very Sexy Flight Attendant,

I was quite impressed with your customer service skills yesterday on the flight home. Your smile was genuine and your eyes had a lovely sparkle. I especially liked the way you showed genuine concern concerning my comfort and convenience, and the erect nipples were indeed a very nice touch. However, the most memorable part of the flight was the inflight show, which made Sharon Stone look like a piker and kept my mind off things like: my book, what time it was, my own name, and any turbulence there might have been. You were very sweet to lavish such attention upon me and the offer was indeed flattering; call me if you are ever free; I would love to take you up on it.

Pity you're married though,

Pedicur8her ...

 

[Thomasoir]

Dear X

Just ask

me.

 

[androgEros]

Dear God,

Please don't let my friend's baby die. Please give him strength to fight this infection that has spread to his heart. He's been fighting so hard since he was born, and he's so tiny.

Dear Anyone,

If you have any prayers to spare, Baby M could use them.

Much Thanks,
Lori

Dear God(dess)es,

Hear our call, and bring Baby M the strength to overcome his health problems. Bring his family and friends peace and courage to endure this trying time.

Infinite Sincerity,
Andi

 

[CrazyPrincess]

Dear Creeper Dude,

Taking orders and bringing you food is my job. Smiling and batting my eyes while being overly friendly is also my job. If it were up to me, you'd have been wearing your food on your lap. Next time, I suggest you keep your hands to yourself.

Sincerely,
The Waitress You Tried To Grope

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear Next Weekend

If you could just oblige with some unusually warm spring like weather for the duration that would be super duper. I have a cute little dress I would really love to wear

K. Thanks for listening

Theatre Weekend Bound Me

 

[Stanstheman]

Dear X

If only you knew the truth.
I have tried,
I have failed.

Maybe it was not meant to be

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear X,

Whoever you are that made the hot pocket, have you not seen how McDonalds was sued numerous times from people who were burned by their products? There isn't a way that after i am done microwaving your product you can't remind me and numerous other that no matter who long it sits, that first bite is gonna cause the roof of your mouth to sear off?

I feel there should be warning lables stamped on the crust of your product. So when I put my favorite mid day snack in our microwave for 2 minutes and 13 seconds (because 2:12 is too little and 2:14 is just a bit too much) that the stamp become available for the eater to see.

I suppose I am so anxious to get that pepperonie goodness into my mouth that I forget that you have enclosed the crusty goodness with radioactive pizza sauce that reaches temperatures of scalding and peeling.

Now I lay in bed running my tongue over the pieces of skin dangling from the roof of my mouth as I wince. All the while completely satisfied because of the flaky goodness I am now digesting. Such a double edged sword. I have contacted lawyers via email and as soon as the swelling has stopped and I can talk again I will be seeking counsel against you.

 

[neci]

Dear X,
i saw this...
http://www.biology-blog.com/images/blogs/8-2006/nature-is-sexy-844772.jpg
and thought of You.

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

Dear X,
you and only you are to blame for it, you know it! But I love you, so much to thank for.
I'm so gonna feed you with swiss roll tomorrow morning!

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear Boutique Style Hotel Manager

Your place looks incredible! He has such good taste I know. If you could just make sure we don't get a broom cupboard room that would be really super. Don't make me pretend it's my birthday or something

Can't Wait For The Weekend To Begin Me

 

[mickyp123]

Dear JBQ, Love you loads

 

[cfuhrer]

Dear X,
I want you to know the great personal restraint it took to see that you were home this morning and NOT run up the drive, pound on your door and demand all the details of your past week.

I mean; you meet someone in an on-line game, they fly from London to the desert of Oregon to spend a week with you, and then don't provide any inidication of how it went, good or bad?? It's not like I want to know EVERYTHING, just highlight. Was she polite, did she like the pace of life around here, does she share your stance on the zombie epidemic?

I know its terribly nosey of me, I know its none of my business... but I really, really want to know if this person and your time together met your expectations!!

I know that to you I'm your friends girlfriend, but to me you are my fiance's friend and that means you are my friend and I want my friends to be happy and I want to KNOW that they are happy and I can only KNOW if you TELL me.

I will not outright ask and put you on the spot but I reserve the right to make veiled references, drop conspicuous hints, and send lots and lots of subiminal messages screaming that I want to know more.

Oh, and bring her 'round next time, we promise not to bite.

Love,
The Cat (Dying from Curiosity)

 

[Thomasoir]

Dear X

Just hearing your voice makes me hard. I just wanted you to know that.

me

 

[flirtygirly]

Dear Fucknut:

get it over with already, don't do a half ass job, save us all the drama

Dear M:

we've done what you asked, and it's still not good enough. yet you seem put out or inconvenienced. promise we'll never ask for help ever again.

Dear WV:

i wish we had more time together. qaulity & quantity.

Dear H&J:

thanks for everything, and for just being there.

Dear MIL:

hope you get better soon, too bad some of your family can't handle it.

Dear Sis:

i shall never doubt you again.

Dear Me:

figure out wtf you are doing, make some changes and get on with it already.

Dear Lit:

why are you so fucking slow sometimes?? grrrr.

 

[Thomasoir]

Dear X

It was great to see you today, even for a little while.

me

 

[flirtygirly]

Dear SIL:

thank you for keeping me informed...even though it's not my problem...it does still affect me/us.

Dear Work & Boss:

I don't like you and wish i could walk out the door permanently.

Dear Spring, Summer & Mr. Sunshine :

I miss you and can't wait your permanent arrival.

Dear K:

I will be your personal typist anytime

Dear City I Moved Out of in August:

Oh how I miss you...and am beginning to think I made the wrong decision.

Dear Baby Doll:

I hope the choices I've made and will make won't fuck up your life. I'll try to do the best with what I've got.

Dear Lit Friends:

Thank you for being there

 

[Daizie]

Dear McDonalds,

I love your cinnamon melts. I want to marry them and have their babies. All that sugary goodness in one little box.

~Lover of sweets

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Dear X,
i saw this...
http://www.biology-blog.com/images/blogs/8-2006/nature-is-sexy-844772.jpg
and thought of You.

Dear x,

I want to eat the forbidden fruit from your tree of knowledge. After I strip your bark, of course.

 

[husky4life]

Dear X

Thanks for the years you put into this program. Good luck where ever you end up.

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

dear bubble tea chica
lets put on our booggie shoes