Dear X

[call_me_Melody]

Dear Mr. Johnny Depp,
How are you today? I hope this letter finds you well and in good spirits.
Please forgive the unsolicited coorespondence but there is something I need to ask you.

I understand you have your own island. I'm sure that with your busy schedule you probably do not have the time to enjoy it. I'd like to offer to you the explanation that really, homes need someone to live there and enjoy them. I am willing to relocate to your island with the company of my choice at NO cost to you.

So I would like to take some time to discuss with you the circumstances leading up to my request and hope that you will consider my very generous offer.

I look forward to your prompt reply.

Best Regards,
Melody

 

[janeyl]

Dear X

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5bo4VDEH-U&feature=related

Just sayin'

always yours

 

[Morrigu]

Dear YouKnowWhoYouAre

I do have opinions,thank you for asking. They are however just that my opinions and really are none of your business.

Yours

Privately Getting on With It

 

[availableslave2u]

dear powers that be,
why can't girls spit as well as men do?
signed,
curious one

 

[limiwa]

Dear Powers that Be,

I asked for a story, he gave me a fantastic love story, twice! Am I imagining this? What the hell, Merry Christmas to you, too. I'm befuddled. I do believe i owe you six pounds of fudge and my soul. However, he has dibs on the soul, just saying. Thank you always.

Blessed Me.

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear Favourite After Work Bar

Please get lots of staff on tomorrow, I love frequenting you dearly but I have a feeling tomorrow could be like a rugby scrum (more than nice if there are ACTUAL rugby players....but not so nice if there aren't) Thanking you in advance and hoping you don't try and persuade me with the hubbly bubbly again...it ain't gonna happen

Christmas Spirited After Work Drinker

 

[flirtygirly]

Dear X:

your family has no idea where you are. no one can reach you. please get your head out of your ass and quit being a selfish dick.

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear Christmas

LET'S ROCK!!!!!

*starts headbanging....stops rapidly..that hurts!*

A Tad Over Excited Me

 

[Lorilei]

Dear X,

I wonder why you don't really talk to me here...

 

[msmaggie]

dear x (ex)

No, I don't want you to come over. No I don't want to have another talk. We're over, it's done. Now let me go.

me

 

[Azuldrgon]

Dear Moodiness:

You've been on overdrive lately. Time to take a break. I have things to do not involving you.

Striving for Contentment.

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear Friends

If we could just keep the noise down to a dull roar this evening and try and not use anyone's wheely bin for a pram race again I would be more than grateful. I am trying to teach my children to be responsible adults and however fab you are you're really not helping me in my quest

I don't wanna have to ban you....for the next couple of weeks!

Thanks

Turning Into A Grown Up Me (yeh right)

 

[Morrigu]

Dear Wanna Be Puppeteer

The next time you try to pull my strings I'll kick you in the knackers.

She Who Wears Spiky Shoes

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear God

Give me strength!

Me

 

[lovemonster]

Dear 2010,

Please can you make sure that you're good to me and those I care about?

Yours hopingly,

LM
x

 

[lovemonster]

Dear God

Give me strength!

Me

Dear You,

I told you, you must stop calling me God, people will talk!

And here's a little something to help:

http://www.gasolinealleyantiques.com/images/Bendys%20Page/popeyolivecan1.JPG

Hope that gives you the extra buck up.

Love

LM
(formerly known as God)

 

[muskokan]

Dear you

I'm sorry that you can't for two seconds understand that not everyone rolls low against your high charisma and that I happen to have a particular immunity to it based on previous experience (and some awesome spells I learned a few levels ago) So no, your attempts to drag me along with everything will not work, I'm also tired of it working on her, and for as long as I'm able to have her in my life i will continue to dispell whatever unfair charm you have over her and hope that she can learn, second hand, some of the lessons I already have, or her benefit and your own if you ever hope to have the happy family that you have been sabotaging for 5 years.

 

[EnglishRoseFox]

Dear You,

I told you, you must stop calling me God, people will talk!

And here's a little something to help:

http://www.gasolinealleyantiques.com/images/Bendys%20Page/popeyolivecan1.JPG

Hope that gives you the extra buck up.

Love

LM
(formerly known as God)

Dear God

You seriously should be like the artist formerly known as prince and put that under your screenname. Hysterical! I'm changing my to Drama Queen unless I can come up with something even fabbier

Thank you for making a horrible time bearable.

Drama Queen Formerly Known As EnglishRoseFox

 

[lovemonster]

Dear God

You seriously should be like the artist formerly known as prince and put that under your screenname. Hysterical! I'm changing my to Drama Queen unless I can come up with something even fabbier

Thank you for making a horrible time bearable.

Drama Queen Formerly Known As EnglishRoseFox

Dear Drama Queen Formerly Known As EnglishRoseFox

Have you ever considered the Drama Llama as a new title?

http://casualhardcore.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/dramallama.jpg

Drama Llamas of the world unite!!

And you're welcome

The artist formerly known as God.
x

 

[brummiesteve]

Dear you know who

I'm gonna miss all this.

Steve

 

[someoneyouknow]

Dear Santa,

Apparently I wasn't sincere or clear enough in what I wanted for Christmas. I'm not sure how that could be as it's the same thing I've been asking for for the last decade. I mean, really, how hard is it to find a cute, athletic asian nymphomaniac who doesn't smoke?

As you have once again let me down, I am going to the next old man with a beard to see if he can fulfill my simple request.

Also, no more rum and cookies will be put out for you as you obviously can't do your job and don't deserve such treats.

Most Perturbed and Frustrated,

Me

 

[limiwa]

Dear Internet Goddess.

Make that web site work quicker, and with much more grace. Blessed thee.

limi

 

[collar_corset]

dear x (ex)

No, I don't want you to come over. No I don't want to have another talk. We're over, it's done. Now let me go.

me

Oooh, hun, I know what you mean! I split with mine 9 months ago and he still whines on about how depressed he is. I don't actually care, I have my own problems which you didn't give a shit about when we were together.

Oops, sorry, rant over

 

[someoneyouknow]

Dear Winter,

You don't like me and I don't like you. We're like two badgers in a box. The faster you leave the less I'll have to resort to using unseemly invectives.

If you would pack your bags and leave as soon as possible, that would be great. Tomorrow would be perfect.

Signed,

He who prefers ovens to freezers

 

[janeyl]

My dearest friend,

I know that you care about me and only want me to be happy but please please please stop telling me what to do. i understand that you are a practical person who looks for solutions to problems but remember we are different people with wildly different personalities-what worked for you will not necessarily work for me. I may complain about my job sometimes but the solution is not to get another one with all of the uncertainty that brings. I know that i complain about my sister living with me but the only answer to that is for her to go and live with my mother which is an even worse scenario than her being here

and finally-I do not want to go to live in fucking Inverness with you. I am not the solution to your loneliness no matter how hard I wish I could ease it for you. Going 600 miles and at least 8 hours journey away from all of my family no matter how much they annoy me is not my solution, it is yours. You made that choice when you went there. I did express my concern at the time but you felt compelled to go and I applaud you for that but I will not be guilted into doing the same

I love you to bits but I really want you to go now

Yours

Craving solitude

Jane