Dear X:

[nh23]

Dear X,
I don't know how to tell you I don't want to play anymore.
I don't know how to say it without it hurting us both.
I like you,I want you...
I know you like me to Top.
I WANT to be a bottom on occasion !!!!
I know it isn't your fault He is out at sea alot.
I know it isn't your fault I can't be open to her being with you.
I just don't understand the whole open/poly thingy yet.
The emotions you evoke are confusing me MAJOR.
I guess that is the 'nilla that won't let go.
The drop I felt sunday was brutal.
I DON'T want to feel it ever again...
I think I will be in spectator mode for a while...
I need to find myself a more consistant Top/Dominant.
I need stability, caring & patience.
I need someone that is MORE than just a scene partner.
I need a switch that prefers to Top or an understanding Dom.
I hate coming home alone after play.
I hate not sharing my needs & wants with someone.
I hate being stagnant in my growth as a bottom/subbie
I can only cage my inner feelings for so long.
every time we play at the cross it gets harder to cage...
I resent her for having you, but know I could never give you what she does...
Freedom....

Goodbye X.. I have learned my lessons well.
until I learn to control the turmoil & emotions, goodbye...

Stegral.

*Big Hugs*

 

[NALA CAYENNE]

You need to know that I'm here for you, Baby. All you have to do is call my name...its yours to call.

Love you

Dear Susie,

I'm not entirely sure why I'm writing aside from it being cathartic and self indulgent. I kind of imagine that when this letter is done, it will be out there, floating around in cyberspace and the Universe, and it will be able to touch you, and find you wherever you are.

You know that I love you. I still don't know all of the details, but I hope it wasn't painful. At first I felt guilty for not being there, but I had already tried to get cancelled from work to get the car fixed, and it didn't happen. I mean, the car breaking down, and not getting out of work - when I really should have, and then me not being able to visit because of my stomach bug, well; I'm thinking that the Universe never had plans for me to be there anyway.

Most importantly though. I want to thank you. You know how my mother is, and how she was away a lot. And you know how when she wasn't physically distant, she was (and always has been) distant emotionally.

You were always there for me.

You've always been my favorite, and I know I was always yours.

I know how you took care of me on a daily basis before I was two, although I don't remember it. But the point in my life where you made the second most important impact was when I was 9.

My mother made a smart move pulling us closer together. I don't know how I would have turned out without you. I credit you for the reason that I have any healthy sense of self worth as an adult.

You were my best friend, you were my only friend. You loved me when it seemed like no one else did. You gave me flowers when no one else did. You supported me and showed me that it was okay to be myself. I will forever be in your debt.

I love you more than words can convey. You were the maternal figure in my life. I feel fortunate that I had that.

I hope you're well. Say "hello" to Grampy when you see him. I will miss you, but I understand how much better off you are now. Dad is saving a place at the table for you tomorrow. Don't be a stranger.

I love you.

-K

 

[Mazuri]

Dear Customer in line while on the cell phone:

No one cares about your conversation. No one wants to hear your fake-assed laughing all the way to the back of the store and no one needs to hear that kind of language, either. We are a drug store, not a bar or your house, and it was well within our rights to ask that you moderate your language or take your call to the privacy of your car.

Also, while you are in my line talking on your phone, I do not feel any need to engage you in any form of conversation whatsoever, as you are obviously happily occupied already. No, I will not open my drawer to make change for you since you didn't tell me you wanted that $20 broken down as you were too busy talking about "THAT FUCKING BITCH" loud enough to make the pharmacist in the back of the store uneasy and the 3 yr old in line behind you cry. No, I will not wish you to have a nice day, a Happy Thanksgiving, or ask you to come back soon.

To myself: No, I will not jam that phone in your ear while washing your mouth out with a variety of scented soaps found on aisle 3. No, I don't care if you ever come back.

Take your business and your rude, vulgar conversation across the street. There are more than enough drug stores in town, you don't have to return to ours.

signed
Frustrated Cashier

 

[NALA CAYENNE]

I agree with your assessment here. I think it very rude of folks who talk on the phone while in line. Even ruder to use vulgar language when children are present.

Dear Customer in line while on the cell phone:

No one cares about your conversation. No one wants to hear your fake-assed laughing all the way to the back of the store and no one needs to hear that kind of language, either. We are a drug store, not a bar or your house, and it was well within our rights to ask that you moderate your language or take your call to the privacy of your car.

Also, while you are in my line talking on your phone, I do not feel any need to engage you in any form of conversation whatsoever, as you are obviously happily occupied already. No, I will not open my drawer to make change for you since you didn't tell me you wanted that $20 broken down as you were too busy talking about "THAT FUCKING BITCH" loud enough to make the pharmacist in the back of the store uneasy and the 3 yr old in line behind you cry. No, I will not wish you to have a nice day, a Happy Thanksgiving, or ask you to come back soon.

To myself: No, I will not jam that phone in your ear while washing your mouth out with a variety of scented soaps found on aisle 3. No, I don't care if you ever come back.

Take your business and your rude, vulgar conversation across the street. There are more than enough drug stores in town, you don't have to return to ours.

signed
Frustrated Cashier

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Dear very dominant totally understanding I'm not lawyer,
When you said to me as we left the courthouse; "The next step you take is going to be the first step in a whole new life for you." I felt as if nothing in the world could stop me from continuing down that path.
Thank you,
your new client

(convo before going to courthouse)
Lawyer: You will do whatever I tell you to do...if i ask you to stand on the desk and drop your drawers you will do it.
Me: Why?
Lawyer: And never ask me why again
Me: *grin*

My kind of lawyer. Sounds like you found the best one you possibly could.

 

[reignophelia]

Dear my very supportive Lit friends,

Thank you.

-K

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

X

You are an amazingly, beautifully gifted, woman. There are times when I sit here and mentally kick myself. But then, I nod and figure I should chalk it up to one of the Lord's funny jokes. I am so blessed that you are my friend. I am so pleased that you are doing so well and if I happen to be a bit bummed that it wasn't me that put the smile on your face...at least I am content that it is there.

Thank you for being who and what you are. The world needs brighter blessings like you. Thank you for allowing me to shop in your mind...I need a woman around who is as stubborn as I am. Thank you for being you: the brightest, bestest friend a Scorpio ex-daddi could ask for. You are my blessing. THAT will never change.

Take care of you.

Me.

 

[chauderlos]

Dear boss,

When you cancel or postpone an apointment, please never tell me beforehand. I enjoy so much waiting in the corridor outside your office or in an empty meeting room.
When you assign a load of tasks, please never tell which ones are high on the priority list. I know it's a test for my managing skills.
When you ask me to complete a job, please ask a fellow co-worker to do it too, without telling us. It's so productive.
When you forget to do something, please say it's my fault. I so much enjoy being your personal scape-goat.
When you have something to tell me, please tell it to others first. It's much more fun to hear it from someone else at the coffee machine.
And, last but not least, when I tell you all this face-to-face, please continue to answer "It's not my fault, you misunderstood me," or " I didn't want it to happen this way, people are so mean with me", or "But, I told you about it, you must have forgotten"; instead of aknowledge your mistakes and try to find a way to improve.
Yours sincerely,
X

 

[Blushing Bottom]

Dear S;

Despite it all I still....

 

[coy_one]

Dear X:
Really. Just go fuck yourself.

 

[sutherngent985]

Dear boss,

When you cancel or postpone an apointment, please never tell me beforehand. I enjoy so much waiting in the corridor outside your office or in an empty meeting room.
When you assign a load of tasks, please never tell which ones are high on the priority list. I know it's a test for my managing skills.
When you ask me to complete a job, please ask a fellow co-worker to do it too, without telling us. It's so productive.
When you forget to do something, please say it's my fault. I so much enjoy being your personal scape-goat.
When you have something to tell me, please tell it to others first. It's much more fun to hear it from someone else at the coffee machine.
And, last but not least, when I tell you all this face-to-face, please continue to answer "It's not my fault, you misunderstood me," or " I didn't want it to happen this way, people are so mean with me", or "But, I told you about it, you must have forgotten"; instead of aknowledge your mistakes and try to find a way to improve.
Yours sincerely,
X

Damn...you must work for the same asshole I used to LOL...

 

[ken0000001]

so true

Love what you said - so true. Not just at the drugstore, but everywhere. And now they are thinking of letting them be used on flights. What a sure way to have a fight. Drats on technology.

Dear Customer in line while on the cell phone:

No one cares about your conversation. No one wants to hear your fake-assed laughing all the way to the back of the store and no one needs to hear that kind of language, either. We are a drug store, not a bar or your house, and it was well within our rights to ask that you moderate your language or take your call to the privacy of your car.

Also, while you are in my line talking on your phone, I do not feel any need to engage you in any form of conversation whatsoever, as you are obviously happily occupied already. No, I will not open my drawer to make change for you since you didn't tell me you wanted that $20 broken down as you were too busy talking about "THAT FUCKING BITCH" loud enough to make the pharmacist in the back of the store uneasy and the 3 yr old in line behind you cry. No, I will not wish you to have a nice day, a Happy Thanksgiving, or ask you to come back soon.

To myself: No, I will not jam that phone in your ear while washing your mouth out with a variety of scented soaps found on aisle 3. No, I don't care if you ever come back.

Take your business and your rude, vulgar conversation across the street. There are more than enough drug stores in town, you don't have to return to ours.

signed
Frustrated Cashier

 

[SubKekiLee]

Dear X
I wish you would see that my daughter isnt hard to live with she just has GREAT family values... Going out last night while we were all cooking and getting ready for today was as important as hanging out with your friends and then fighting with you wife over it wasnt that great either.. Made me want to leave.... I am sorry you two cant get along...

signed
MIL

 

[Yang4yin]

Dear X,

We've tried for years to get you to cook less for the Thanksgiving dinner, but you just won't listen. Please don't get upset with us when we don't have seconds of everything. It's delicious, but it's just not possible.

Y

 

[doveofserenity]

Dear X,

We've tried for years to get you to cook less for the Thanksgiving dinner, but you just won't listen. Please don't get upset with us when we don't have seconds of everything. It's delicious, but it's just not possible.

Y

lol...they always cook wayyyyyy too much, and expect us to eat some of everything. And then go back for seconds??? i feel like the overstuffed turkey right now.

 

[DVS]

Dear D and L...my two older sisters.

Well, once again, when you two get together, you assume you are always correct and I, being the younger brother, and the only son that lived (and the one you always thought got away with ANYTHING growing up), I lose and you are there to tell the relatives your side of the story, which OF COURSE is how it happened.

How many years have we shared a ride to Thanksgiving dinner? How many years have I parked in the same spot, waiting for you two to show up, because you told me an earlier time, so you wouldn't have to wait for me. Don't think I don't know that's true, because I'm always there at 10:00 and you always roll in around 20 after.

If I'd done that, you'd be pissed and give me the evil eye the rest of the day, for making you wait on me. You two are so tight, you're almost Siamese twins...being born only a year apart and five years before I came along. But, I digress...

You said be there at 10:00, and I was there ten minutes before 10:00. I didn't part in the same spot as I always do, because there was an SUV there. I had to find another spot. But, I thought the spot I found was a pretty good one, because it was right smack at the entrance of the parking lot. When you turned in, there was no way you could miss me. Well, if you were looking for me, that is.

No, I wasn't in the normal spot, but I was no more than 20 feet from it. No, I wasn't pointing in the direction of that spot, because I thought sure you could see me, where I was. No, I wasn't watching for you, because I don't see how you could have missed me, where I was...right there in the first parking spot, closest to the entrance. I'm sorry, but I don't see how you could have missed me. Two sets of eyes, and neither of you could look straight ahead, and see me?

What do I think happened? I think you were only looking for me in that spot and because I wasn't in that spot, you didn't think I was there yet. Yes, I worked all fucking night, and no I didn't get any sleep after I got off work. I didn't want to risk over sleeping and miss meeting you.

As of this writing, I've been up thirteen fucking hours now, and I'm wide-awake, pissed at how fucking stupid you two were. You said you got there shortly after 10:00. You said you waited for me until 10:30 before you decided I must have fallen asleep and wouldn't be there. You did say L got out of the van and walked around looking for me. That's nice, but did you forget that I've recently purchased a car, and L has never seen it?

D, you are the only one who has seen my car, so why didn't you get out and walk around? I know why...because you assumed I was asleep and you didn't want to wait for me. I'm sure you both decided on that scenario. Why? Because you never have thought much of me, and never will.

You two are like two peas in a pod and I'm always the black sheep. Why do I say that? Because I know you. I'm sure you are yucking it up with the relatives right now, telling your side of stories from our past...stories that I've never heard and where I'm the bad guy, the late guy, the person in the wrong, or the one mother chose over you, when you thought you were in the right, but jilted again. But, again I digress.

You said you left the Walmart parking lot at 10:30? You know when I left? 11:30. I thought you might have had car trouble or been in an accident. I was thinking of looking for a policeman to ask about accidents, or calling emergency rooms, thinking the worst might have happened. But, I waited until 11:30 because I KNEW as soon as I left, you'd pull in and think it was stupid for me to leave, when you were on your way.

In fact, I drove around the parking lot, thinking you might have been shopping, because Walmart was open. I ended up leaving the parking lot about noon. I just can't believe you missed me. I was 20 fucking feet from the spot I'm normally in. 20 FUCKING FEET!

No, I wasn't watching for you, because I was reading the paper. I was facing the entrance, though, so if you had looked through your windshield, you would have looked straight into mine. At that time, you would have been maybe 10 feet from me, at the most. If I'd known you were both going to be so fucking blind that you'd miss me from that distance, I would have been watching closer.

I wasn't even reading the paper. I was just looking at the ads. I looked up and over to that spot quite a few times...but I never saw you there. Now I'm wondering where the hell you could have been parked, if you were there until 10:30. That's a whole 30 minutes you would have been sitting there. And I didn't see you? I'm sorry, but something's fishy about that.

What the hell were you looking at, when you pulled into Walmart? That spot I'm normally in, and I wasn't there, I'd guess. Then, both of your minds decided I was asleep and you weren't going to be late to dinner because of me. You waited a lousy 30 minutes.

I drove to your house, because it was closer than mine. I know how to get inside because you never lock that one door. How stupid is that? Don't you know that your homeowners insurance won't cover any burglary loss if you don't lock your fucking doors?


I walked in, expecting to find your dead bodies on the floor. But, you weren't there. But, your fucking expensive dogs were. All of them...each one pure bread little prissy yappers, about $300 or more apiece. Don't you know there are sad dogs in the pound that would LOVE to come home and live with you? But, instead you two pay big bucks for expensive breads and put bows in their hair to keep it out of their eyes.

I called up to Aunt J's to ask if they had heard from you...expecting her to tell me about some horrible accident and which hospital I was suppose to go to. But, she said you were there and wondered why I wasn't there, too. I'm surprised she could even hear me over those five yapping varmints! Yes, they're all cute, but so are dogs from the pound...before they are put to sleep because nobody wants them. AGAIN I digress!

D, you came to the phone and said I could still come up, and there would be food for me to eat. I'm sure there would have been, but it would have been after 2 PM before I could get there. Then, I'd be eating alone while everybody else was in the living room talking, if they hadn't already gone home. And, there's the lack of sleep aspect of the deal, and I didn't think it would be wise to drive up there alone and expect to get back home without falling asleep on the way. So, I decided not to go.

Oh, I liked how you said it was 1/2 my fault that you missed me. I don't see how you decided that. There were two of you in that van. Neither one of you could see me sitting there? Give me a break. And you said L got out and walked around? Shit, she could have seen my car and not even known it was me.

What did you tell her to look for? A green Honda? L doesn't know what a '94 Honda looks like. She'd have to be right on top of me and read the word HONDA before she'd know what it was. D, YOU should have been out walking around...not her. Remember? You've seen my car and she hasn't. Or, if you really wanted to find me...why not both of you look? Doesn't that make better sense to you?

When I got home, I found that you did try to call me...thinking I was asleep. That's how I found out you only stayed until 10:30 before deciding to leave. That's what the first message said. And to top it all off, you left SEVEN MORE messages, as you drove on...giving me a play by play of where you were each time. The last message said you were there, and going inside to dinner. That was cute...and also a little rude, don't you think?

Now, don't you think if I had been home that I would have heard one of the EIGHT phone calls you made to tell me where you were? I know I might have slept through one or two of them, but seriously...EIGHT? That should have told you I wasn't there, don't you think?

Oh, I liked that one message you left..."be sure to call us when you wake up, so we don't think you are in a ditch somewhere." You were so damn sure that I fell asleep, that you quipped about me crashing the car into a ditch. What if I actually had been in an accident? Did that even cross your mind? Of course not.

Well, it's now been fourteen hours since I've had any sleep, but I'm still too pissed to be tired. I'm heating up some chicken strips for my Thanksgiving dinner. Maybe I'll feel like sleeping some, then.

I can't wait to hear the stories told about this Thanksgiving. Trust me...I know it will be all my fault that I wasn't where I was suppose to be, and my eyes weren't glued to the entrance flailing my arms around, so you can see me. 20 feet...I was just 20 feet from the spot, and you couldn't see me? You really tried, didn't you.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Dear very dominant totally understanding I'm not lawyer,
When you said to me as we left the courthouse; "The next step you take is going to be the first step in a whole new life for you." I felt as if nothing in the world could stop me from continuing down that path.
Thank you,
your new client

(convo before going to courthouse)
Lawyer: You will do whatever I tell you to do...if i ask you to stand on the desk and drop your drawers you will do it.
Me: Why?
Lawyer: And never ask me why again
Me: *grin*

Hmmm, sounds like you have found the perfect lawyer in so many ways. BTW, did you get asked to stand on the desk and drop your drawers?

Catalina

 

[Kajira Callista]

Hmmm, sounds like you have found the perfect lawyer in so many ways. BTW, did you get asked to stand on the desk and drop your drawers?

Catalina

no...and im glad i didnt... i dint have any on

 

[Chris_Xavier]

Dear X,

You are a functioning alcoholic and you have been for a long long time. The fact that no one in your family will acknowledge it doesn't change that fact. The fact that you threatened me tonight because someone poured out your booze tells me that you are moving away from that functioning alcoholic status to that of just an alcoholic.

I hope that tonight's little "blow up" will cause some people to "man up" and tell you to your face what they have been saying behind your back for years.

Your drinking is impeding your health and you say you know it but you don't act like it.

 

[nh23]

Dear C,
I'm sorry that I can't stay with you..I just feel like you have so much that you need to think about, so many decisions that you have to make..and I don't want to be in the way of that. I can't let myself think that I'm standing between something that can affect your life so much. And to be honest.. I can't take the chance of being hurt myself that way again. Nor do I want to be responsible for hurting you that way one day. You know that if you ever need my friendship that I'm right here. I don't have anything to offer other than that. If you hate me and don't want it..that's ok. I understand. I hope that you take much needed time to get things straightened out for yourself. I wish you all the happiness in the world..and I mean that.
Nicole

 

[BiaTcHiNFiRe]

Dear X,

Have I ever told you
that if I sit really still and silent,
sometimes. I like to think
I can hear your heart beating
in time with mine?

Have I ever told you
that when I watch you speak to me
through lines and cords,
and bytes and ram,
I imagine
your voice,
whispering into my ear?

Have I ever told you
that I wait out each day
in anticipation,
wanting
only an hour or two,
just a second in space and time,
to feel close to you?

Have I ever told you
that there has been times,
when I ached for you,
ached for you so badly,
that the emotions overwhelmed me..
and so I sat and cried?

Have I ever told you
that sometimes,
I will reach out,
touching your name
on this cold screen before me,
wishing
I could reach in
and pull you to me?

Have I ever told you
that I would give everything up,
just for one night
to be able to lay near you,
to feel your chest rise and fall
with each breath you take,
just to know that you are real?

Have I ever told you
that I dream of you often,
I dream of you reaching out
and touching my hand,
simply to let me know
that you are there,
and everything is okay?

Have I ever told you,
have I still yet to tell you . . .
that I love you?

lots of love
me
​

 

[BiaTcHiNFiRe]

I dunno what happened, but I am sending lots of warm hugs to you nh23 and to Chris_Xavier {{{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}}

Whatever happened I hope you will work things out somehow

I keep my fingers crossed for you two!!

 

[Homburg]

Dear X,

Wow, you get a LOT of letters!

-R.

 

[nh23]

I dunno what happened, but I am sending lots of warm hugs to you nh23 and to Chris_Xavier {{{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}}

Whatever happened I hope you will work things out somehow

I keep my fingers crossed for you two!!

Thank You

 

[professorquixote]

Dear X-
Fuck you.
-CJ