Dear Clowns

[LusterMunky]

Is Clowns still Dear? I'm fucking tired of not getting advice to questions I don't post.

 

[IhateClowns]

Is Clowns still Dear? I'm fucking tired of not getting advice to questions I don't post.

I am still open for business, it just seems that although the posts clearly show people are quite insane here they feel that self help therapy is their best route to go.

 

[starrynightin64]

I am still open for business, it just seems that although the posts clearly show people are quite insane here they feel that self help therapy is their best route to go.

~Waves Hellllllllooooooo Mr. Clown!

Maybe this will explain some of it...
Stolen FaceBook status of the day...


"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you."
— Rita Mae Brown

 

[LusterMunky]

the posts clearly show people are quite insane

Bingo! Take the money and run. You and I, of course, are not insane. Tis our burden to bear in an insane world.

 

[IhateClowns]

~Waves Hellllllllooooooo Mr. Clown!

Maybe this will explain some of it...
Stolen FaceBook status of the day...


"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you."
— Rita Mae Brown

Hey Starry....Just saw this hope you are doing well. That fits this place quite nicely although I think 2 out of 3 is a little low..lol

 

[IhateClowns]

Bingo! Take the money and run. You and I, of course, are not insane. Tis our burden to bear in an insane world.

Yes I would say that I am about as sane a person as there is in this place

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Clowns,

Why?

Dear Why,

Because I said so....

 

[arnoldlane84]

Dear Clowns,

Why?

Dear Why,

Because I said so....

Hah, that used to be my mum's stock answer when I questioned her

Hope you're alright fella

 

[LusterMunky]

I am still open for business

Good.



Dear Clowns,

A train load of nubile rhubarb-munching Mormon virgins leaves Provo, Utah at noon on Friday, headed to Hollywood. The train averages 48 mph until it hits the California border, at which point it averages 32 mph between every stop that is within 2.5 miles of an In-N-Out Burger, where it stops for 33 minutes each, while the nubile young lasses hike up their skirts and run like track stars to get their cheeseburgers, fries, and chocolate shakes.

Meanwhile, a Giant Land Turtle with my eighth mother-in-law strapped on it's back leaves Hollywood at the same time, bound for Provo, averaging 0.08 mph and stopping for 57 minutes at every at every roadside stand that sells petrified wood or garden gnomes.

Who reaches Rancho Cucamonga first?

Sincerely

~ Trippy Planner

 

[IhateClowns]

Good.



Dear Clowns,

A train load of nubile rhubarb-munching Mormon virgins leaves Provo, Utah at noon on Friday, headed to Hollywood. The train averages 48 mph until it hits the California border, at which point it averages 32 mph between every stop that is within 2.5 miles of an In-N-Out Burger, where it stops for 33 minutes each, while the nubile young lasses hike up their skirts and run like track stars to get their cheeseburgers, fries, and chocolate shakes.

Meanwhile, a Giant Land Turtle with my eighth mother-in-law strapped on it's back leaves Hollywood at the same time, bound for Provo, averaging 0.08 mph and stopping for 57 minutes at every at every roadside stand that sells petrified wood or garden gnomes.

Who reaches Rancho Cucamonga first?

Sincerely

~ Trippy Planner

Are they on their period? Really depends if they are or aren't. When watching women's softball you can clearly see who is plugged up and who isn't. They move slower. Almost like inertia.

But to get straight to the answer. The answer is Burrito. When in doubt alwasy order the burrito.

 

[Honey123]

Dear Clowns


What's your favorite part of Summertime?

OOXX...
Sunkissed Honey

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Clowns


What's your favorite part of Summertime?

OOXX...
Sunkissed Honey

Dear Sunkissed,

That is my favorite flavor of orange soda. I like the apple bottom blue jeans and boots with the fur. Then the next thing I know I would be looking at herrr. Then she hit the flo, and the next thing I know, that shorty got low low low low.

I also like being outdoors and the summer is more conducive to that. I love tan lines and lemonade. Picnics and 4th of July. My fave holiday.

 

[Honey123]

Dear Sunkissed,

That is my favorite flavor of orange soda. I like the apple bottom blue jeans and boots with the fur. Then the next thing I know I would be looking at herrr. Then she hit the flo, and the next thing I know, that shorty got low low low low.

I also like being outdoors and the summer is more conducive to that. I love tan lines and lemonade. Picnics and 4th of July. My fave holiday.

LOL...

I love all of that as well... especially the smell of suntan lotion!

 

[IhateClowns]

LOL...

I love all of that as well... especially the smell of suntan lotion!

Only if it is coppertone because the rest is just shite.

 

[Honey123]

Only if it is coppertone because the rest is just shite.

Ok.. but.. don't tell anyone.. I only use SPF4. I know... but sometimes I love the smell of burning flesh.

Ok.. that just sounded weird.

But.. I do love BBQ's!

 

[IhateClowns]

Ok.. but.. don't tell anyone.. I only use SPF4. I know... but sometimes I love the smell of burning flesh.

Ok.. that just sounded weird.

But.. I do love BBQ's!

Burning flesh huh? I may see you on a CSI episode in the near future huh. Creepy. I bet you like BBQ's lol. Anyone want a skewer of male cock? How about a nice thigh?

SPF4? You have any tan lines?

 

[BradBigBrain]

Dear Clowns,

I got this note from my wife the other day:

http://cdn2-b.examiner.com/sites/default/files/styles/image_full_width/hash/46/73/4673a038ef5c017bc087a9a35699fdd9.jpg

What should I do? I love me some Sasha Grey porn and I know I may be taking things into my own hands to much. I just can't help myself. Please help with some good advice.

~
Mary Fivefinger is my lover

 

[Fmature2play]

Dear Clowns:
I have an irrational fear that my slit might grow closed for lack of use. I went from being married for approx 150 years to dating almost exclusively women and that fell apart because I wasn't ready to "tie the knot" with her, to virtually no sex at all. I am afraid the lack of use (use it or lose it theory) is gonna be the death of my kitty. Any suggestions?

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Clowns,

I got this note from my wife the other day:

http://cdn2-b.examiner.com/sites/default/files/styles/image_full_width/hash/46/73/4673a038ef5c017bc087a9a35699fdd9.jpg

What should I do? I love me some Sasha Grey porn and I know I may be taking things into my own hands to much. I just can't help myself. Please help with some good advice.

~
Mary Fivefinger is my lover

Dear Handling your own things,

There is nothing wrong with self loving. I am all for it. Now I do have to say there is somthing very wrong about having 40 threads dedicated to the art of masturbation and when someone is doing it, ho they are doing it, whether they have been caught doing it, whether they are doing it in front of someone, whether they do it left or right handed, etc etc...

Tell you r wife to blow you more often and let you stick it where the poo comes out every now and then and you will do your best not to get caught so much masturbating. How does she know you masturbate so much? Are you a moaner? Do you scream out her name everytime your pancake batter spalshes on your wrist? If so grab a huge chunk of big league chew and do your best not speak up anymore.

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Clowns:
I have an irrational fear that my slit might grow closed for lack of use. I went from being married for approx 150 years to dating almost exclusively women and that fell apart because I wasn't ready to "tie the knot" with her, to virtually no sex at all. I am afraid the lack of use (use it or lose it theory) is gonna be the death of my kitty. Any suggestions?

Might I suggest a 20 year old boy looking to learn, or a toy with a Sam's Club membership for batteries. Better yet ride a bicycle with a banana seat over cobble stone streets on a daily basis and that way you can be rest assured your slit will get some sort of work out on a daily basis. You might walk a bit bow legged but if you mess your hair up a little people will just think you got the fucking of your life.

Good luck

 

[BradBigBrain]

The film depicts a dystopian Los Angeles in November 2019 in which genetically engineered organic robots called replicants—visually indistinguishable from adult humans—are manufactured by the powerful Tyrell Corporation as well as other mega manufacturers around the world.

Dear Clowns,

We're 8 years away from 2019. LA sure doesn't look as dystopian as Ridley Scott's vision of it. Do you think we'll get there in 108 years? With replicants and people like Deckard?

BR fan.

 

[cowslinger64]

Dear Clowns:
I have an irrational fear that my slit might grow closed for lack of use. I went from being married for approx 150 years to dating almost exclusively women and that fell apart because I wasn't ready to "tie the knot" with her, to virtually no sex at all. I am afraid the lack of use (use it or lose it theory) is gonna be the death of my kitty. Any suggestions?

LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Dear Clowns.... now that the evil troll has been silenced and possibly killed....will you be going to Disneyland?

 

[IhateClowns]

LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Dear Clowns.... now that the evil troll has been silenced and possibly killed....will you be going to Disneyland?

I am unsure about Disneyland...Maybe the Bunny Ranch although most of the women on there I wouldn't touch with my ten foot pole...I mean A 10 foot pole. Sorry for divulging the truth "accidentally" there.

 

[BradBigBrain]

Dear Clowns,

Have you returned? Who are you now?

Signed,
I ain't missing you at all
Since you've been gone away

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Clowns,

Have you returned? Who are you now?

Signed,
I ain't missing you at all
Since you've been gone away

I am back albeit it more part time then anything. Still Clowns. Apparently the harasser wasn't aware of lit. So I don't have to worry as much anymore.