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Dawn: Voice of bearlee

ShavedGuy said:
I'm not scared of spiders, although i did get bitten my one about a year ago on my hand and the poison caused my hand to swell to twice it's size and then necrosis set in and the tissue.....well i wont go into the gross details :eek:
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I'm torn here dude. I'm thinkin' the poison either went from your hand into your brain ... or into your dick. Not too likely it went to both places since spider poison tends to specialize in going one way. So now I just don't know what type of spider might have bit you.

Let's try it this way. Were you just as insane before this happened. Or perhaps, was your dick this short even a year ago?!?
 
ShavedGuy said:
Yeah, that's true.......i believe that in your final year of studies if your examiner can actually understand what you saying you fail your degree in law :D
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without my dictionary I can make no funny posting. Shit can happen. :)
 
TomOne said:
I'm torn here dude. I'm thinkin' the poison either went from your hand into your brain ... or into your dick. Not too likely it went to both places since spider poison tends to specialize in going one way. So now I just don't know what type of spider might have bit you.

Let's try it this way. Were you just as insane before this happened. Or perhaps, was your dick this short even a year ago?!?
Click to expand...


According to my doctor i'm a lot better now than i was a year ago. I now get to sleep unrestrained and outside my padded cell http://www.cheesebuerger.de/images/smilie/konfus/a080.gif
:D
 
ShavedGuy said:

According to my doctor i'm a lot better now than i was a year ago. I now get to sleep unrestrained and outside my padded cell http://www.cheesebuerger.de/images/smilie/konfus/a080.gif
:D
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You got padded cells in that jungle?!?
ran57gr said:
Lee, you said you were looking for a black swede, well...

I found you one!!


:cool:​
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Oh ... :( ... this hurts ran!!! Tempting my poor bear away to a black sugar lollypop!!! :eek: Oh welllllll ... I hope he enjoys himself.
 
ran57gr said:
I'll go check for a pulse :cool:
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And did you feel the heat!

TomOne said:
I'm torn here dude. I'm thinkin' the poison either went from your hand into your brain ... or into your dick. Not too likely it went to both places since spider poison tends to specialize in going one way. So now I just don't know what type of spider might have bit you.

Let's try it this way. Were you just as insane before this happened. Or perhaps, was your dick this short even a year ago?!?
Click to expand...

I'm thinking it was.

Weenieschnitzel said:
without my dictionary I can make no funny posting. Shit can happen. :)
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Now I have to say that was fuckin' hilarious!

Many Feathers said:
If you were to check Lee's pulse with your mouth, I am sure you'd find one. :D
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Maybe-maybe not! Ran, I wasn't looking for a black swede by the way-SG was.

TomOne said:
You got padded cells in that jungle?!?
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I thought he said cello?

So, I have some pics to save for a couple illustrated stories. I just hope I remember where I left 'em when I need 'em. Ran, find these for me later;)
 
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bearlee said:
So, I have some pics to save for a couple illustrated stories. I just hope I remember where I left 'em when I need 'em. Ran, find these for me later;)
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And these too Ran :cool: Now if they don't get deleted :rolleyes:
 
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Ran Remind Bear when he is looking for those pictures that I put them on a floppy in my second to the top desk drawer just in case I forget :)

Kinda nice pictures he even signed them !
 
sybilrose said:
Ran Remind Bear when he is looking for those pictures that I put them on a floppy in my second to the top desk drawer just in case I forget :)

Kinda nice pictures he even signed them !
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Syb, remind Ran to remind to remind you to remind Ran to remind me to check out your drawers :cool:

Night all :cattail:
 
bearlee said:
I'm thinking it was.
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Dear Sirs:

I am writing to ask your help in locating my missing wife. We were on a wonderful trip to Africa for our honeymoon several months ago. On our flight back, we had a connection in England and somehow became separated. I had her paged for several hours and then contacted local and international police to assist me in locating her. To date, all of our attempts to find her have been unsuccessful. I am now desperate to find my lost love and am trying to use the Internet to locate her. Please forward this to everyone you know so I can spread the word on locating my missing wife.

Sincerely,

Mr. BearLee
USA

After a few weeks search....



Dear Mr. BearLee:

We have found your wife in Africa of all places. However, it is unknown how she got here, nor is she able to talk because of lockjaw, but we are under the impression that she does not want to leave. We have tried for several days to bring her back home, but she is insistent on staying here. I have enclosed a picture for you to see that she is okay, and not let you worry because she is in good hands here in this village. Please contact us if there is anything else you might want to know.

Nairobi Police Department - See photo attached
 
PERFECT STORY

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a
perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was,
of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect
couple was driving their perfect car along a winding road, when they
noticed someone in distress at the side of the road. Being the perfect
couple, they stopped to help.

There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to
disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple
loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving
along delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions
deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident.
Only one of them survived the accident.

Question: Who was the survivor?

Scroll down for the answer.

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Answer:

The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in
the first place! Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no
such thing as a perfect man.

**** Women you can stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.

**** Men keep scrolling.

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So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have
been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.


**** Women, if you have read this too... stop reading here, this is
REALLY the end of the joke.


**** Men keep scrolling

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By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this illustrates
another point :

WOMEN NEVER LISTEN!!!
 
sybilrose said:
I have never seen it so clean! Are you sure this is my desk? Wait I had some twinkies in the file drawer...Who took my twinkies!! :eek:
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Mmphf...whath twinthkies :rolleyes:
 
sybilrose said:
I have never seen it so clean! Are you sure this is my desk? Wait I had some twinkies in the file drawer...Who took my twinkies!! :eek:
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btw, I tossed bear's pics in the secret drawer, I hope you remember where it is, I was a bit tipsy at the time :cool:
 
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