Daddy's Little Girl: Second Edition

[Smoothshavendad]

Have any of you been told by others “you’re not a sub, you’re a ____” or “you’re not a little, you’re a _______.”?

That’s been my experience in my few years in the LS. I even wrote a piece on Fet about not knowing what I am, so out of uncertainty I post that I identify as a switch. But, that doesn’t necessarily fit me either. Then I get to wondering how important a title or role really is, and to me, it’s important. I want to know what box I fit into. Maybe mine is in the land of misfit toys? *

Just be you. You are perfect.

 

[LostGirlTink]

Have any of you been told by others “you’re not a sub, you’re a ____” or “you’re not a little, you’re a _______.”?

That’s been my experience in my few years in the LS. I even wrote a piece on Fet about not knowing what I am, so out of uncertainty I post that I identify as a switch. But, that doesn’t necessarily fit me either. Then I get to wondering how important a title or role really is, and to me, it’s important. I want to know what box I fit into. Maybe mine is in the land of misfit toys? *

I find that labels are only important in that they help start a conversation.
I don’t fit in a specific box or label either

 

[barefootgirl69]

Have any of you been told by others “you’re not a sub, you’re a ____” or “you’re not a little, you’re a _______.”?

That’s been my experience in my few years in the LS. I even wrote a piece on Fet about not knowing what I am, so out of uncertainty I post that I identify as a switch. But, that doesn’t necessarily fit me either. Then I get to wondering how important a title or role really is, and to me, it’s important. I want to know what box I fit into. Maybe mine is in the land of misfit toys? *

I understand that! It was important to me at the beginning to help me figure things out. We're talking about structure, and I think it goes along with something like that. We know that label.

Then, I discovered a bit more. I like my label, but I am not going down a checklist of what makes a perfect little girl. I'm me... like Tink said, it helps to start a conversation or when you're explaining why you do certain things to people who have no idea and look for labels.

 

[barefootgirl69]

Hello friends.

I just wanted to say I am sorry for the drama that was visited on this thread over the last week. None of it was my intention.

To those who I should have listened to before, I'm sorry.

I'm a stupid boy and need to listen more.

You're all lovely.

I'm really sorry.

 

[cascadiabound]

I find that labels are only important in that they help start a conversation.
I don’t fit in a specific box or label either

This.

And I think many of us are somewhere on a continuum. Not black or white this or that. And how we understand ourselves both changes over our lifetime and in relation to who we are interacting with.
Just as I am simultaneously a sister a daughter an employee an aunt etc, I may be submissive in my primary love relationship, but bossy as heck to others. I may be introverted in fact, but socially outgoing and fearless in public.

Labels are only useful if they help you gain clarity on yourself and help to articulate stuff...don't ever let them limit you or let others use them to define you.

 

[BadBard]

misfit

Have any of you been told by others “you’re not a sub, you’re a ____” or “you’re not a little, you’re a _______.”?

That’s been my experience in my few years in the LS. I even wrote a piece on Fet about not knowing what I am, so out of uncertainty I post that I identify as a switch. But, that doesn’t necessarily fit me either. Then I get to wondering how important a title or role really is, and to me, it’s important. I want to know what box I fit into. Maybe mine is in the land of misfit toys? *

Shi, I think we're all misfits to one extent or another!

As long as you can make the pieces fit together with someone else, isn't that all that really matters?

I agree with Tink and BFG, you need a place to start from...but isn't it more about exploring and learning as you go along?

 

[Moochienanu]

Have any of you been told by others “you’re not a sub, you’re a ____” or “you’re not a little, you’re a _______.”?

That’s been my experience in my few years in the LS. I even wrote a piece on Fet about not knowing what I am, so out of uncertainty I post that I identify as a switch. But, that doesn’t necessarily fit me either. Then I get to wondering how important a title or role really is, and to me, it’s important. I want to know what box I fit into. Maybe mine is in the land of misfit toys? *

I’ve been asked in my ampic thread, and thus trying to write something about how I’m little, but not the perfect definition (as I feel many of us must be according to the posts above this in reply to you). You are what’s inside you’re soul. Sometimes fitting someone else’s mould isn’t in our cards. I’ve been told I’m a middle, but I like the thought of being little too much. It just... made too much sense to me once I read a bit and learned what it meant.

I like what Tink said, labels are good for starting a conversation, but past that, we’re all so different it is unimaginable to think we would all fit in one box (I could totally break it with just a wiggle of my booty).

 

[cascadiabound]

I’ve been asked in my ampic thread, and thus trying to write something about how I’m little, but not the perfect definition (as I feel many of us must be according to the posts above this in reply to you). You are what’s inside you’re soul. Sometimes fitting someone else’s mould isn’t in our cards. I’ve been told I’m a middle, but I like the thought of being little too much. It just... made too much sense to me once I read a bit and learned what it meant.

The bolded bit rings esp true to me.
Lots of things about the DD/lg dynamic feel right to me, but more often than not other people's definitions of what a "little" is doesn't seem to fit me at all. So... just gotta feel my way and be who I am whatever that is and sometimes labels be damned.

 

[HeavyBalls]

*makes a cookie, brownie & poutine delivery*

 

[cascadiabound]

*makes a cookie, brownie & poutine delivery*

Thanks HB! I'll have a bite of brownie.

 

[Moochienanu]

*makes a cookie, brownie & poutine delivery*

Vegetarian poutine for me, please! Comfort foods sound perfect right now.

 

[Shi_One81]

Can someone be dominant without being a “Dom”?

 

[ExiledWelshman]

Can someone be dominant without being a “Dom”?

Do you mean can they be dominant without identifying as a dom?

 

[Shi_One81]

Do you mean can they be dominant without identifying as a dom?

Yes, something like that.

 

[Moochienanu]

Can someone be dominant without being a “Dom”?

I think so. Some people just instinctively act a certain way and don’t necessarily identify with a label.

 

[barefootgirl69]

Can someone be dominant without being a “Dom”?

I would think any "alpha" personality would/could. It does necessarily mean they want that in a relationship.

I'm thinking of cb, not saying she's alpha, but she's mentioned that she's different at work than in a relationship. Correct me if I've spoken out of turn, cb!

 

[ExiledWelshman]

WHat moochie and bfg said.

 

[curvyangel1969]

Do you mean can they be dominant without identifying as a dom?

I've met several people like this. I'm instinctively drawn to them. They are just alpha type personalities not necessarily into any form of the BDSM lifestyle in any way.

Edit: I meant to quote Shi as well.

 

[DappleDoxie]

I would think any "alpha" personality would/could. It does necessarily mean they want that in a relationship.

I'm thinking of cb, not saying she's alpha, but she's mentioned that she's different at work than in a relationship. Correct me if I've spoken out of turn, cb!

Not cb, but ...
Working in Big Box Retail Mgmt for so many years requires that I lead. Working in the barn with the horses requires that I lead.
But I need something altogether different in relationships. I just want to be small ... leave the outside world to run itself.

 

[barefootgirl69]

Not cb, but ...
Working in Big Box Retail Mgmt for so many years requires that I lead. Working in the barn with the horses requires that I lead.
But I need something altogether different in relationships. I just want to be small ... leave the outside world to run itself.

I know this feeling very well! In my day-to-day, I'm in charge...after that it's "forget this stuff, let me color/sew/cook" anything but be in charge.

Do you like coloring or anything like that just to get lost in?

 

[DappleDoxie]

I know this feeling very well! In my day-to-day, I'm in charge...after that it's "forget this stuff, let me color/sew/cook" anything but be in charge.

Do you like coloring or anything like that just to get lost in?

I do like my color books! Also playing an online game I've tinkered with for years. Lots to do with the horses and the land I own. Creating with my beads and wire. The Little Dogs keep me company in my little shop. We don't do people very often.

 

[cascadiabound]

Can someone be dominant without being a “Dom”?

Yes. I believe there are many dominant type individuals who are not "Doms" - maybe because they have no proclivity for it, maybe because they have not found their wiay to it *yet*

I would contend, that it is rather rare to find a Dom who is not also dominant in some way - even if it is a quiet laid back kind of dominant - in every aspect of their lives.

These individuals may come to discover their kinky interest in BDSM or come to realize their urges to be controlling in sexual encounters actually *means* something more than just that.... if you know what I mean.

I would think any "alpha" personality would/could. It does necessarily mean they want that in a relationship.

I'm thinking of cb, not saying she's alpha, but she's mentioned that she's different at work than in a relationship. Correct me if I've spoken out of turn, cb!

There are also people who are dominant/ alpha leaders in their public lives who are not dominant in their private sexual lives at all. Yes bfg, I have spoken of this enough it is fair of you to point this to me... I have a bossy streak and it works for me in my public/professional life. And I can be rather bossy in relationships as long as they are relationships that have no possibility of ever every becoming intimate. What one of my friends describes as *nurse ratchet*

 

[cascadiabound]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/2b1e876e783692bda5580167ef66c7fa/tumblr_plfsu2VgMW1s1zwyj_540.jpg

new book... seems like this belongs here

 

[cascadiabound]

I know this feeling very well! In my day-to-day, I'm in charge...after that it's "forget this stuff, let me color/sew/cook" anything but be in charge.

Do you like coloring or anything like that just to get lost in?

When I was in school I loved my color pencil anatomy color study plates.
I still enjoy working with color pencils, but I use them as part of developing design proposals.
these days the work that is most meditative for me and feels most *frivolous* just for me is knitting... never for sale, in my hands, repetitive, soothing, but productive.

 

[cascadiabound]

"There's a difference between being a daddy and wanting to be called daddy."


true dat