Cuckold and the cheating wife

[ramonedarkstone]

I just can't take it anymore. I hope someone out there will take me up on this, out of pity, out of a turn on, or whatever. I'm just going crazy with all of it bottled up inside.

I need to talk about my wife and marriage. Over 18 months ago my wife and i had a big discussion. Basically she was determined to look outside the marriage for sexual fun. She was no longer attracted to me and she had already made the decision. This was preceeded by some months of things a bit rocky but i had no idea to this extent.

We determined we would not get divorced however, as it wouldnt be good for other reasons. So i had to sit through her "bachelorette" phase, knowing she was going out, looking to get fucked.

She still got me off, and still does, even though she has a relatively steady boyfriend at the moment. She knows she's still my wife and gives handjobs at least a couple of times a week, but only handjobs. I suppose its enough to keep me from looking elsewhere.

When we got married, and during the time of our marriage before all of his, she has been the perfect suburban style wife and mother. The total girl next door type. I knew she wasnt a virgin when we met, and only pieced together her sexual past before getting together, and had realized she was pretty promiscuous before we met.

Basically i need someone to talk this over with! Call it an online psych or counselling session. Maybe you get off on the whole cuckold idea. I don't care if you're all down on me for it. I might even prefer that. I want someone to ask me all about the dirty details. I might even be willing to show some pics in the future if we are really getting along.

 

[mtrainer]

This could get interesting very fast, ramone.....

My base male chauvinistic tendencies would like to start
by asking you to describe your bride...

 

[ramonedarkstone]

She is white, slim, 31 years old, 34b chest, 5'6, medium length brown hair with blue eyes. Very pretty. No supermodel, but i catch guys checking her out. Dresses conservatively, has great legs.

 

[LimoAndPizza]

What's her phone number? I need my cock sucked. You can watch if you want. No touching, though.

 

[ramonedarkstone]

She's not a pure slut, otherwise i might consider it.

 

[LimoAndPizza]

As an aside...do you not have the desire to go out and find a good fuck yourself? If my SO was doing that, I'd damn sure be out there getting laid, too. Just curious.

 

[jaF0]

Do you two talk about it? Does she give you any details? Would you want to hear it? Does she always go out of does she ever entertain in?

 

[ramonedarkstone]

We don't really talk about it. I guess I'm not such an open person which is why I'm finding the need to express myself here. She generally will not give details. She never volunteered details of other guys she dated before we met. I thought it was one or two before over the years things slipped out. She has quite the sexual history before we met, as I've discovered.

This is sort of the same thing. We don't openly talk about specifics of her dates. She'll tell me she has plans next saturday or something, so we can coordinate our schedules. But now and then she might divluge a place she went, or if she got drunk, or how late she was out, or something like that. I've gleaned more details from hearing her on the phone with him, or with girlfriends. She obviously knows it's not a secret, so it's not like she's going out of her way to hide it, but she's not waving it in my face.

I would LOVE to know all the dirty little details, but I don't know if I could take hearing them all from her.

It's rare that the house will be empty, so she generally goes out. I think she has entertained in once while I was away, and she's been picked up and dropped off from here as well.

As for why I'm not dating. As pathetic as it sounds, I still love her, and I don't think I can do any better than her. I don't have the motivation to live the single life while I'm married, even if she does.

 

[ramonedarkstone]

Holy shit, JAF0! I just read your post/thread about ankle bracelets. It could be coincidence, but I'm just going crazy here right now because she started wearing one just before all of this started happening. What are the chances!

 

[aurich1]

cuckold???

I let my wife fuck two friends of ours as long as I can watch & participate. This might not work for everyone, but it sure works for us!

 

[TexasWife25]

No matter how I think of it
I just cant see the appeal of cuckold...

 

[jaF0]

We don't really talk about it.

We don't openly talk about specifics of her dates. She'll tell me she has plans next saturday or something,

I would LOVE to know all the dirty little details, but I don't know if I could take hearing them all from her.

OK, well I was going to make some suggestions, but they may not be right for your situation.

 

[ramonedarkstone]

Its not something i want to "cure" or "fix". Might be beyond any of that. Just for now, want to talk it out. Sometimes it just helps.

 

[biggunner75]

Sometimes you just have to enjoy the ride

 

[RunningJib]

Why not

Its not something i want to "cure" or "fix". Might be beyond any of that. Just for now, want to talk it out. Sometimes it just helps.

Why not reach into her panties once she return home and ask for details? I'm certain you'd have her full attention

 

[ramonedarkstone]

I suppose i am posting here in order to "enjoy the ride". I just want to talk it over with someone. Another cuck? A bull that will enjoy hearing my situation? I just want to spill my guts about the whole thing. Her sexual past, how it happened, etc.

 

[ramonedarkstone]

BumpIng. Not sure if i should.

 

[goodsonformom]

No matter how I think of it
I just cant see the appeal of cuckold...

Ditto..........unless you're the other guy. Even that is weird at times.....if the husband is truly devastated it came be very uncomfortable.....but....

If he is truly turned on by it.....leans toward Bi....and it is not humiliating.....then it can be very exciting.....

 

[roguelife6]

I suppose i am posting here in order to "enjoy the ride". I just want to talk it over with someone. Another cuck? A bull that will enjoy hearing my situation? I just want to spill my guts about the whole thing. Her sexual past, how it happened, etc.

I see contradiction in here. Are you looking to be humiliated or for comfort? I get you're trying to post and see where it leads for you, but I think you need to process it a little on your own, figure out what you really need. maybe just letting out some anger would help? physically (break something, scream out loud) or emotionally (trash her, call her names, your welcome to do it here if the publicity of it helps). if its the humiliation, maybe use a confrontation from her. Or during those handjobs, make her tell you stuff (so she understands you wnat to know for your pleasure, not for revenge). or go extreme and look for a Dom.

maybe showing her some of your dominance will help get more facts from her. does she bring guys home? maybe install a security cam for your pleasure, if you think you can handle it.

 

[Lost_Yonder]

I agree with roguelife, the contradictions are quite apparent. It almost seems you gain pleasure from being cuckold, yet you also are quite upset by the twist. The question is: are you upset but what your wife is doing or upset that you are accepting of it and perhaps even mildly turned on by it???

It is a complicated situation, but ultimately can only be dealt with once you figure out your own desires in this. Is it a need to seek out another woman? or to know the "dirty details"? or perhaps even participate, actively or passively?

I don't envy your situation... But a "cuckold" comes in all stripes. Some are utterly unaware their wife is cheating on them, others are submissive and totally turned on by their wives being with other dominant men, others lovingly share their wives watching and participating, if not directing. You obviously aren't the first, but where do your desires fall???

 

[NightL]

Basically she was determined to look outside the marriage for sexual fun. She was no longer attracted to me...

I want someone to ask me all about the dirty details. I might even be willing to show some pics in the future if we are really getting along.

What exactly do you want, a monogamous loving relationship or submission and humiliation along with a loss of masculinity? What happened to "Seeking online sub"?

I suggest she not only finds you unattractive but she also has no respect or indeed love for you. That is not a marriage.

...or is this thread just fodder for your masturbation? If this is indeed genuine... where are you going to get the pictures from? If she is keeping you out of the loop you most certainly will not be around to take photos let alone have permission to share them. Are the photos you are talking of just of your penis?

 

[ramonedarkstone]

I know haven't been on or replied in a while, but I have received great advice and helpful "listening ears" while on here. I hope everyone is still all understanding as I come back to update.

I'm glad some of you recognize the confusion that's going on with me through all of this. NightL, as humiliating as it is to say, I think the loss of attraction is a huge part of it for her. She is still amazing as ever, and you would never have guessed she had any kids if you saw her. The pics part just had to do with showing what she looked like, but had nothing to do with the affair. The "seeking online sub" might just be part of my psyche trying to make sense of the feelings inside. I've swung across either side of the spectrum of looking for a 'dom' and a 'sub', so that's the only explanation I have for it.

As far as the love goes, it is still there. We hardly ever argue or fight. We still get along great as friends. She's never expressed any desire to leave the marriage, not to mention the internal and external family pressure to keep things together. As I explained before, she has always maintained her 'wifely duty', getting me off regularly. In fact, this has recently expanded, adding to my own confusion about the situation.

We have had maybe all of four serious conversations about this whole thing. It's more of a 'don't ask, don't tell' sort, but now and then we do have to talk about it. She has a regular boyfriend she sees every Saturday for their date (fuck) night. That's nothing new, but she sat me down two weeks ago to tell me they've progressed to doing it without protection now. She's back on the pill, but no more condoms. She felt she had to tell me to be fair as far as health and safety is concerned (though ironically we hadn't been having intercourse).

Here is where I did apply some of the advice Roguelife6 gave, about figuring out what I need. I think it's still all shaking itself out. But basically during our little talk, we did revisit her 'marital duties' again, and I told her I wanted whatever her boyfriend was getting. A 1:1 ratio of sorts, and she agreed that was fair. It came to reality the following sunday when she was servicing me with her hand, and she unexpectedly started going down on me. I asked her if she did it for him and she just nodded, and serviced me orally until I came in her mouth. She didn't swallow. We also had intercourse that week, and both this week again.

Am I confused? Absolutely. Lost_Yonder asked if I was mildy turned on by this. Yes, I am. I knew for sure one morning after I did make the house empty for her on Saturday. I came home early, I guess hoping I would see him, maybe even catch them, but he was already gone. I went upstairs and found her asleep in bed. She wasn't expecting me there, but I saw her sleeping so soundly, and looking so incredibly sexy as she was still naked under just a sheet. The aftermath of their evening was evident, empty wine glasses on my nightstand, and her dress crumpled at the side of the room. But there was a look of sheer bliss and peace on her face, she didn't even wake up from me coming inside or into the room. At that moment I couldn't stand it and I ran into the bathroom and jerked off with her panties. That was when I knew for sure I was turned on, but at the same time, if I could stop all of this right now, I would.

Is it odd that at once I want to worship her and also call her a slut and see her get used? I want comfort, but I don't know if the humiliation comforts me. I could be a man and demand that it stops, but then she would just leave. Worst case scenario right now, is I have a sexy friend with benefits, right?

Either way, my need to talk this out with SOMEONE is as great as ever. Thanks to the community for all your help so far.

 

[Tmmldr]

So you haven't said....do you get her off? You've talked about what she does and does not do for you.

 

[ramonedarkstone]

Because it seems no, i haven't. Not in a while.

 

[ramonedarkstone]

To elaborate, she doesn't seem to want to cum from me. She gets it from him just about every week, cumming more than once, i gather. When we do it, she is fine with just a servicing. (that's why i use that word, because it isn't so mutual). Kind of more embarassing that way too, which i have mixed feelings about.