Creationism.

[Weezard]

How can we go down the "fail at introduction" checklist:

1. Pretend to be God. Check.

2. Insult people as much as possible. Check.

3. Imply people are gay. Check and check.

Pathetic, and just when i was beginning to want you something terrible. Stop right now this silly whining, and you can still have my children. I am a truly wondrous baby maker, possessing all the preferred tools for speedy procreation. So get out of your funk, and return to being your hot little self.

 

[Byron In Exile]

Wizards just make stuff up.

That one was true, though.

 

[Recidiva]

Pathetic, and just when i was beginning to want you something terrible. Stop right now this silly whining, and you can still have my children. I am a truly wondrous baby maker, possessing all the preferred tools for speedy procreation. So get out of your funk, and return to being your hot little self.

Please disabuse yourself of the notion that I give the slightest of damns about your procreative abilities. I just think you're tiresome and you think you're witty.

 

[Recidiva]

That one was true, though.

Well, normally if it were Latin you'd be right, but this is made up by Ms. Rowling in her pretend universe.

 

[Byron In Exile]

Indeed, Needles is a smallish, backwater, community on the Colorado River. It is fairly quite, and few big events occur to stir up the citizens. However, a few miles north is Sodom and Gomorrah, where a person's every lust is catered to with near flawless precision. You would not believe what a man, or woman, can take from those casinos/whorehouses, or from the streets for that matter. It takes about an hour for me to go there, pick up what I need, or want, and return home. Too, I have a pick of beautiful young things from around the world, but that is another story.

I just drove through there once.

And there were a ton of inconvenient gas stations I might have stopped at, going west.

They all looked like complete shitholes, so I went on.

Ten minutes later, I see I sign saying, "No gas for 90 miles"

Now you tell me...

 

[Byron In Exile]

I think the inherent problem with the God of the Old Testament compared to the New is that if Jesus knew the will of God, why did it contradict so much of what God did previously?

God does a bunch of dumbass stuff.

And then Jesus says that God wants you to Judge not, lest ye be Judged, while saying that God will Judge you.

So therefore I suppose I'm just following Jesus's words by Judging God based on his own holy yardstick. Comes up short.

I never knew about the Holy Yardstick until now.

Damn, this board rocks.

 

[Recidiva]

I never knew about the Holy Yardstick until now.

Damn, this board rocks.

I think certain translations refer to it as the Holy Meter stick. Stupid metrics.

 

[Byron In Exile]

I have no idea what "Real men don't flee their girls" means.

It's a fucking hilarious life-observation, but the hilarity probably depends upon the context of the thing.

You had to be there...

 

[Byron In Exile]

Well, normally if it were Latin you'd be right, but this is made up by Ms. Rowling in her pretend universe.

Y'know, made-up Latin makes me cringe, unless it's intentional; and there's plenty of that.

Not that it offends... just... the Romans were way more clever.

Especially with sexual innuendo.

 

[Recidiva]

It's a fucking hilarious life-observation, but the hilarity probably depends upon the context of the thing.

You had to be there...

Yeah, I get that.

 

[Byron In Exile]

I think certain translations refer to it as the Holy Meter stick. Stupid metrics.

That's fine for Chemistry, but as far as taking a car's engine apart... it would be cool if it didn't require three different sets of tools.

 

[Byron In Exile]

Yeah, I get that.

The idea that women were actually people originated in Sparta.

 

[Recidiva]

The idea that women were actually people originated in Sparta.

No, it didn't. Spartan women might have been people, but the Spartans themselves were slave owners with a tradition of military service because they had to put down slave uprisings brutally.

 

[hobbit.]

The idea that women were actually people originated in Sparta.

They were also wrong.

 

[Byron In Exile]

No, it didn't. Spartan women might have been people, but the Spartans themselves were slave owners with a tradition of military service because they had to put down slave uprisings brutally.

Baby-steps.

It's not like 1920 AD happened overnight.

 

[hobbit.]

No, it didn't. Spartan women might have been people, but the Spartans themselves were slave owners with a tradition of military service because they had to put down slave uprisings brutally.

to own a slave it has to be human, or else it is only a possession, such as a dish washer.

what's the difference between a woman and a computer?

you only have to punch information into a computer once!

 

[Byron In Exile]

They were also wrong.

Is it wrong that after 2000 years, I'm still on the fence about this?

 

[hobbit.]

Is it wrong that after 2000 years, I'm still on the fence about this?

After sitting on a fence for 2,000 years i would assume the splinters in your arse take precedence over the accuracy of any answer.

anything with a uterus is much like anything based on a microsoft operating system, eventually it will fuck you up big style,

 

[Recidiva]

Baby-steps.

It's not like 1920 AD happened overnight.

It wasn't even a baby step, really.

Plenty of tribes had fertility being honored, prostitution revered and women in positions of power in the community and spiritual life prior to the Spartans in history. Sure, they had blood sacrifice and such. Oops.

I'm not saying that Christianity wiped out all the good stuff, but the tribes certainly made a point of tracking down and burning to the ground all the pagan communities that were more weighted toward female autonomy and destroying their Asherahs. They also went out of their way to demonize "wise women" as witches throughout their history.

 

[Recidiva]

Is it wrong that after 2000 years, I'm still on the fence about this?

You might have to...clarify...before I bring down the wrath of womanhood. Go.

 

[phrodeau]

You seem to be taking an undue interest in my testicles. Are you certain you don't have ulterior motives. I mean, after all, I've had far too many tweaks do a swoon from their utter admiration of them, and you are beginning to give me that uneasy feeling.

Don't you love all mankind?

Give us a kiss.

 

[Weezard]

Please disabuse yourself of the notion that I give the slightest of damns about your procreative abilities. I just think you're tiresome and you think you're witty.

Then why are you still here, panting hotly, pink tongue hung out, saliva dripping, and an endless stream of bow-wows making your hairy belly pump obscenely?

 

[Weezard]

Don't you love all mankind?

Give us a kiss.

You know very well that I, Weezard the Magnificent, do not kiss men (I love too much the rose-like fragrance of a hot woman). That aspect of my behavior is left solely to those fine women and young females of the species. On LIT their day would not be complete if they did not receive Daddy's special attention to their many needs and desires.

 

[Sean]

I'm assuming it's a blob alt?

 

[Recidiva]

I'm assuming it's a blob alt?

Don't think so. But I'm not really reading more of the style. Curiosity sated.