Corrupt a Wish...

[Subzero22]

Here is how this works. You have to grant the wish made by the last poster but also corrupt it in some way or form. Then you make your own wish.

An example: One person might post, "I wish I had a harem of girls."

Then someone might reply, "Your wish is granted but they are all lesbians and won't let you touch them." then they would post their wish.

So to get this started, I wish I had the best computer in the world.

 

[NoTalentHack]

Here is how this works. You have to grant the wish made by the last poster but also corrupt it in some way or form. Then you make your own wish.

An example: One person might post, "I wish I had a harem of girls."

Then someone might reply, "Your wish is granted but they are all lesbians and won't let you touch them." then they would post their wish.

So to get this started, I wish I had the best computer in the world.

Your wish is granted. You have the best computer in the world. The global economy melts down as the machines running factories, stock exchanges, the internet, power plants, and many many more vital parts of infrastructure disappear. That, however, is the least of our problems. Planes, medical equipment, cars, trains, and more suddenly cease operation.

Still, at least you’ve got bragging rights when it comes to running Call of Duty.

Boy, I wish I was healthier.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Your wish is granted. You have the best computer in the world. The global economy melts down as the machines running factories, stock exchanges, the internet, power plants, and many many more vital parts of infrastructure disappear. That, however, is the least of our problems. Planes, medical equipment, cars, trains, and more suddenly cease operation.

Still, at least you’ve got bragging rights when it comes to running Call of Duty.

Boy, I wish I was healthier.

Your wish is granted; you're healthy beyond your wildest dreams. Why, you may even live forever. Unfortunately you've been convicted of such a heinous crime you've been sentenced to a life term, with no possibility of parole, in solitary confinement.

I wish I could get that story finished.

 

[onehitwanda]

I wish I could get that story finished.

It's perfect. The perfect story. John Steinbeck himself couldn't have done better, and in fact would have snapped his pen in half and taken up landscaping had he been around to read it.

No better story will ever be published.

But nobody will ever read it. Not even the amplification bots. Not even your mum. Not even your cat.

Nobody.

I wish I didn't have to work.

 

[Bamagan]

It's perfect. The perfect story. John Steinbeck himself couldn't have done better, and in fact would have snapped his pen in half and taken up landscaping had he been around to read it.

No better story will ever be published.

But nobody will ever read it. Not even the amplification bots. Not even your mum. Not even your cat.

Nobody.

I wish I didn't have to work.

Granted.
You'll now be confined to the form of an infant until your natural demise. No one expects infants to work.

I wish I had an Oscar Meier Weiner.

 

[AchtungNight]

You have one. But it’s covered in spicy mustard that makes it unappealing to taste.

I wish for world peace!

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Granted, an agressive Virus kills all life on earth, making earth peaceful and allowing it to heal.

I wish to be able to seduce any woman I want.

Mirabile dictu! And you are given the power you seek. Unfortunately, the first woman you want has a jealous husband with a double barrel 12-guage. As Andrew Marvell said, "The grave’s a fine and private place, / But none, I think, do there embrace."

I wish I understood the math of string theory.

 

[GoldenMaia]

Granted. You now know more than either Einstein or Hawking! But unfortunately your # came up and you are taken as a sacrifice for the Morlock underground overlords.

I wish I had perfect judgement with people.

Granted. You have the perfect judgement with people, but you are now haunted by all the bad things people have done/feel guilt about.

I wish I had a sexy bedmate.

 

[DeMont]

Awe man... Hahaha.. nice one. Good luck with yours!

Granted, @GoldenMaia will have great luck in finding, and keeping, a sexy bedmate.
Meanwhile I wish I could, as Elvis said, "Make the world go away...!"

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Granted, @GoldenMaia will have great luck in finding, and keeping, a sexy bedmate.
Meanwhile I wish I could, as Elvis said, "Make the world go away...!"

And so it goes, along with all the food, friends, and fleshpots you loved so dearly. But cheer up; you'll die of dehydration before you starve to death.

I wish I could bring all the women I wrote stories for together for a night.

 

[Lip_tease]

And so it goes, along with all the food, friends, and fleshpots you loved so dearly. But cheer up; you'll die of dehydration before you starve to death.

I wish I could bring all the women I wrote stories for together for a night.

Granted, on one fateful night of your choice, every women who you wrote stories for appear, all at same time, plucked from their reality and pushed into this space, without any warning. Overwhelmed with fear and confusion they scream and scatter away before you could even explain them what's happening.

I wish, I have the power to manipulate the probability of every possible event within a one-mile radius around me.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Granted, and you discover, as you should have expected, that manipulating the probability of one event affects the probability of all the other events, and each one you manipulate to account for your last manipulation engenders another infinity of changed probabilities. Overwhelmed, the last probability you manipulate is that of your never having existed.

I wish I had my youth to live over the same way as the first time around.

 

[DeMont]

Granted, and you discover, as you should have expected, that manipulating the probability of one event affects the probability of all the other events, and each one you manipulate to account for your last manipulation engenders another infinity of changed probabilities. Overwhelmed, the last probability you manipulate is that of your never having existed.

I wish I had my youth to live over the same way as the first time around.

Granted, you are lying in your mother's arms squalling like a baby... hey, wait a minute, you are a baby...!
I wish I was seventeen again...

 

[Lip_tease]

Granted, you are lying in your mother's arms squalling like a baby... hey, wait a minute, you are a baby...!
I wish I was seventeen again...

Granted, you are slowly deaged, till your body turns back to how it was when you were seventeen. Similar to 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button', everyone around you ages normally, you age backwards, growing younger every year. You are forced to move around, escaping the eyes of government and powerful people who would kill to have your ability to de-age. When you reach seventeen, your body stays the same till the end of your life.

I wish I could find my soul mate in this life time.

 

[Voboy]

I wish I could find my soul mate in this life time.

Granted. Bet you didn't think your soulmate would be a goldfish, though, and sadly? His life time will be all too brief.

I wish UPS would speed up the delivery of my package.

 

[Trisha20016969]

Granted. Bet you didn't think your soulmate would be a goldfish, though, and sadly? His life time will be all too brief.

I wish UPS would speed up the delivery of my package.

Your wish has been granted. Your package is delivered a day earlier but it’s not the package you ordered. You open it up and see that it’s a 12 inch two headed dildo and now since you opened it you have to keep it.

I wish my work day would be over quicker.

 

[Voboy]

I wish my work day would be over quicker.

Poof. You're fired.

I wish I'd ordered a malt instead of a milkshake.

 

[4rced2Njoy]

Granted! You order a malt instead of a milkshake. Unfortunately, you happen to be ordering at an establishment largely staffed by bored teenagers and an alcoholic shift manager. They don’t follow appropriate hygiene guidelines for cleaning equipment and the malt machine is contaminated with botulism. You drank your malt; now you are dead. Next life, just enjoy your damn milkshake.

I wish I could teleport.

 

[Voboy]

I wish I could teleport.

Granted. Go teleport. Just... well, you can't always choose your destination, and when you said you wanted to teleport to a luxury cruise ship, there was no way you could know it would be the Andrea Doria. Enjoy trying to surface from 255 feet!

I wish they'd repave my street.

 

[sweetheart97]

Granted. Go teleport. Just... well, you can't always choose your destination, and when you said you wanted to teleport to a luxury cruise ship, there was no way you could know it would be the Andrea Doria. Enjoy trying to surface from 255 feet!

I wish they'd repave my street.

They repave the street, but they regrade it as well, and now all the water flows into your basement.

I wish I could fly.

 

[SwedeSubTwink]

They repave the street, but they regrade it as well, and now all the water flows into your basement.

I wish I could fly.

Wish is granted, you have been transformed into a seagull!

I wish I had a drink right now.