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Josie_03 said:
I receive a lot and can say that the key is respect. I do like lengthy intros, its a good indicator that the person is interested in a conversation.
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I try not to write terribly lengthy initial messages anymore (they take too much time both to write and to read, and can make you seem eccentric), but neither am I terse. I always say something about why I found whoever I'm writing to interesting, and why I wanted to contact them.

I remember one time when a female Litizen wrote back and asked if my message wasn't just a copy-paste that I sent to many women. She asked what in her posts had made me perceive the qualities that I had written to compliment her on - I actually had to go back through her posts and then send her a reply with quotes from her own writings that supported the nice things I'd said about her.

She believed me, after that, but we didn't wind up becoming friends or anything.
 
Reed8 said:
I was thinking in regards to responding to someone. Finding the right words when someone reaches out first is not always easy. I can be ambiguous at times and fire at the hip too quickly. I have found myself readings someone’s post multiple times just to make sure that I am understanding them.
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I've done this too, because I have had times I reacted too quickly and crossed a line or two by accident
 
Midwest50Guy said:
you can also read their past posts and bring up something that they posted, or something in their profile if it is filled out.

Girls do love answering questions and talking about themselves. (i know i am going to get it for that one..lol)
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You deserve what you get for that comment. I for one am curious to a fault and ask a ton of questions. But feel I'm not particularly interesting.
 
Karabare said:
You deserve what you get for that comment. I for one am curious to a fault and ask a ton of questions. But feel I'm not particularly interesting.
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I think that questions are a great thing and love answering them, makes me feel like someone is interested and cares to learn more, but maybe that's just me...
 
This is awesome :)

Now it seems that many on the tread like to look at the profile and some posts of a person before attempting to start a conversation. With the ability to edit/create a profile, and many not knowing you can use your signature to make on, does this cause another obstacle when seeing if starting a conversation is favorable?

I have difficulties with the start of a conversation when there is no profile or posts from that person. And sometimes am hesitant to begin a conversation if I cannot determine if the person is male or female.
 
Karabare said:
You deserve what you get for that comment. I for one am curious to a fault and ask a ton of questions. But feel I'm not particularly interesting.
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There was some humor in there for the record. so first of all smile ok.

second, i am sure you are. everybody is in their own way.
 
rlaflamme said:
This is awesome :)

Now it seems that many on the tread like to look at the profile and some posts of a person before attempting to start a conversation. With the ability to edit/create a profile, and many not knowing you can use your signature to make on, does this cause another obstacle when seeing if starting a conversation is favorable?

I have difficulties with the start of a conversation when there is no profile or posts from that person. And sometimes am hesitant to begin a conversation if I cannot determine if the person is male or female.
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unless you are trying to seduce the person right out of the gate (not sure that works anyway) I wouldn't get too hung up on the sex of the person, especially in public. Just be yourself and let what happens naturally happen. worst that happens is that you make a new friend which isn't a bad thing.
 
I wonder if I’m the only person who doesn’t look at a profile before talking to someone. Ironically I’m like that IRL too. I don’t judge people by how they look, I need to feel a connection though.
 
Gracie13 said:
I wonder if I’m the only person who doesn’t look at a profile before talking to someone. Ironically I’m like that IRL too. I don’t judge people by how they look, I need to feel a connection though.
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I do generally read it but typically for me it's to learn more about them after a post has caught my eye
 
Midwest50Guy said:
unless you are trying to seduce the person right out of the gate (not sure that works anyway) I wouldn't get too hung up on the sex of the person, especially in public. Just be yourself and let what happens naturally happen. worst that happens is that you make a new friend which isn't a bad thing.
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And the gender doesn't really deter me from making a connection for conversation. I just like to have a bit of an idea.
 
I’m less bothered by profile but I’m always suspicious of folks that have no posts...
 
rlaflamme said:
Is that because there is no way of looking into some of their thoughts to determine if you can even start a connection?
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I think for me, it makes it hard to engage and really find something to start a conversation off really.

Of course people are not compelled to post etc..

It makes me think they're not looking to engage.
 
RedJack81 said:
I think for me, it makes it hard to engage and really find something to start a conversation off really.

Of course people are not compelled to post etc..

It makes me think they're not looking to engage.
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Yes. It's harder to start something deeper than hi, how are you? Without a profile or posts. Or worse they have one post that was 3 years ago, you start a conversation based on that and that post isn't relivant anymore and I as the pmer look like an idiot.

I also wonder if I can really identify with someone who lurks, I'm not a does anything halfway kind of guy, see for reference 21 thousand posts... but... I did have someone recently tell me a good reason for their lack of posts, it being that they prefered to flirt in private one on one, and I respect that and like that reason even.
 
RedJack81 said:
I think for me, it makes it hard to engage and really find something to start a conversation off really.

Of course people are not compelled to post etc..

It makes me think they're not looking to engage.
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Plus it increases the likelihood they are a bot...
 
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