Comedy Of Errors

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


No, he's in Tartar limbo, worse than hell.
A devil in an everlasting garment hath him;
One whose hard heart is button'd up with steel;
A fiend, a fury, pitiless and rough;
A wolf, nay, worse, a fellow all in buff;
A back-friend, a shoulder-clapper, one that
countermands
The passages of alleys, creeks and narrow lands;
A hound that runs counter and yet draws dryfoot well;
One that before the judgement carries poor souls to hell.

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


Why, man, what is the matter?

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


I do not know the matter: he is 'rested on the case.

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


What, is he arrested? Tell me at whose suit.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


I know not at whose suit he is arrested well;
But he's in a suit of buff which 'rested him, that can I tell.
Will you send him, mistress, redemption, the money in his desk?

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


Go fetch it, sister.

Exit Luciana

This I wonder at,
That he, unknown to me, should be in debt.
Tell me, was he arrested on a band?

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Not on a band, but on a stronger thing;
A chain, a chain! Do you not hear it ring?

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


What, the chain?

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


No, no, the bell: 'tis time that I were gone:
It was two ere I left him, and now the clock
strikes one.

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


The hours come back! that did I never hear.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


O, yes; if any hour meet a sergeant, a' turns back for
very fear.

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


As if Time were in debt! how fondly dost thou reason!

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Time is a very bankrupt, and owes more than he's
worth, to season.
Nay, he's a thief too: have you not heard men say
That Time comes stealing on by night and day?
If Time be in debt and theft, and a sergeant in the way,
Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day?

Re-enter LUCIANA with a purse

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


Go, Dromio; there's the money, bear it straight;
And bring thy master home immediately.
Come, sister: I am press'd down with conceit--
Conceit, my comfort and my injury.

Exeunt

 

[Guru]

SCENE III. A public place.



Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse




ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


There's not a man I meet but doth salute me
As if I were their well-acquainted friend;
And every one doth call me by my name.
Some tender money to me; some invite me;
Some other give me thanks for kindnesses;
Some offer me commodities to buy:
Even now a tailor call'd me in his shop
And show'd me silks that he had bought for me,
And therewithal took measure of my body.
Sure, these are but imaginary wiles
And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here.

Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Master, here's the gold you sent me for. What, have
you got the picture of old Adam new-apparelled?
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


What gold is this? what Adam dost thou mean?

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Not that Adam that kept the Paradise but that Adam
that keeps the prison: he that goes in the calf's
skin that was killed for the Prodigal; he that came
behind you, sir, like an evil angel, and bid you
forsake your liberty.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


I understand thee not.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


No? why, 'tis a plain case: he that went, like a
bass-viol, in a case of leather; the man, sir,
that, when gentlemen are tired, gives them a sob
and 'rests them; he, sir, that takes pity on decayed
men and gives them suits of durance; he that sets up
his rest to do more exploits with his mace than a
morris-pike.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


What, thou meanest an officer?

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Ay, sir, the sergeant of the band, he that brings
any man to answer it that breaks his band; one that
thinks a man always going to bed, and says, 'God
give you good rest!'
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


Well, sir, there rest in your foolery. Is there any

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Why, sir, I brought you word an hour since that the
bark Expedition put forth to-night; and then were
you hindered by the sergeant, to tarry for the hoy
Delay. Here are the angels that you sent for to
deliver you.
ANTIPHOLUS