Cleaning My Desk - Lavy Gets Sappy

[lavender]

 

[Calamity Jane]

I've had a friendship or two like that. It's so difficult being their friend, and it's sometimes more difficult walking away.

I wonder, often, whatever happened to....

 

[sexy-girl]

those are some interesting thoughts lavender i would say also although i dont really have much experience with it i think some people need to break away to start fresh maybe he needed to cut ties with you so he could rebuild ... who knows though maybe you will hear from him later down the line

people always meet up with old friends they thought they would never see again

i must admit also that i am a hoarder for keeping things when lisa left i wrote down her phone number on a piece of paper and her email address i still have the bit of paper i used to carry it with me because i didn't have a photo of her for a while

 

[Guest]

I am sitting here cleaning out my desk and throwing stuff away and keeping some stuff and I came across something.

You see, while I was living abroad, I met this great guy. We were amazing friends. I have very fond memories of him as well as some very negative memories. We met at a bar - but continued daily communication via email to make plans for the night, the weekend, anything. We would email each other all day through work. Maybe 2 emails or so a day - normally very silly.

He was an alcoholic.

The above statement is partially what has always had me worried about him. He got really bad right before I left. I had discontinued most communication with him - but he always knew where to find me. He knew what bars my friends frequented. He didn't disturb me - he just hurt me and I had to break away.

He was there to take me to the airport my last night. He had been to a concert and left early and I see him running through the streets as my friends and I were leaving the bar to go back to the place where I lived.

I told him goodbye and then left. But, he was more adamant. He talked the man who was giving me a ride to the airport into allowing him to come. He kept in touch via email for awhile, but ultimately I lost contact. My friends told me he would come and sit, just sit in the lobby of the place where I lived. They would see him out and about. I heard stories that he moved to San Francisco or Budapest. I knew that he kinda got kicked out of his apartment. He has a shady past and is a difficult creature.

We lost touch because either he quit his job or he got fired. I don't know. But, he no longer was receiving my emails. On numerous occasions I have checked online to see if I could find him. He is a true computer guru - so I know he's out there somewhere.

Last year I had a dream that he was a gutter drunk. It bothered me. I was so sad for him. I woke up in the middle of the night and did a search. I've search on various chat programs. I sent everyone on ICQ with his first and last name a message. I know, it's weird. But, I know that we were truly close in a very bizarre way.

I was cleaning my desk and found one of his old corny emails. It brought a smile to my face.

It was a fun year. He was probably the most turbulent relationship ever. He was probably the least physically intimate relationship ever. He was probably the most unnamed relationship ever. He was definitely the least into me of any relationship ever. But, he just may have had the most impact on my life.

Makes me think.

You idiot. You talk too much. are u lonely? yes.

 

[lavender]

 

[alltherage]

Sometimes finding out is so hard. I had a friend whose mother was murdered. for reasons that are not that important that kind of end was something the family accepted as being possible. I thought, as an american that things like that just dont happen. Years past from the last time I saw my friend and then one day i read in the ny times that indeed her mother had been murdered. I had no way to contact this person and it drove me nuts. finally i did find her and she turned out to be great.

i recently found an old high school friend. he married late and has two very young children. his wife has cancer and the prognosis is not good. sometimes finding people is just hard.

 

[lavender]