Being out of one's league

[lilminx]

Do you ever use that phrase, or a variation of it?

What constitutes a person being out of another's league? Looks? Money? Personality? Job? All of the above?


How often do you think it happens that a man may think a woman is out of his league and doesn't pursue it, yet she would be interested in him? (or vice versa)


I'm curious to hear others' thoughts on this.

 

[ExLimey]

All women are out of my league.


Can you self-esteem issues?

 

[april-wine]

SIGHHHHHHHHHH......Alas you are out of my league........

 

[Wiggles]

I don't hear it a whole lot. If a person uses it towards themselves that's a great big sign of low self esteem. If someone uses it towards another that's downright vain, I think.

I don't really believe in that kind of thing anyways. People are way too complicated to be placed in leagues just because of one aspect of their lives, or selves. And even if they are really stacked in one area, maybe they'd prefer someone who's better in another area.

To not persue someone, using the exscuse of 'they're out of my league' is basically just cowardice. You never know until you try.

I.m.o. that is.

 

[islandman]

Often. It's a confidence thing.

 

[KillerMuffin]

I've used it. Some people just aren't in my league. I'll rip them to pieces. Of course, the corollary is that I'm not in their league either.

 

[erosman]

Yes, I do.

Here, I'm more likely to think that I'm just playing minor league ball, mostly. But...in RL...well...that's another league

 

[Nora]

I think there has to be an overall sense of reality when one looks for a mate, but one-on-one cases should be taken individually.

The greasy guy with no job and a beer-gut probably on the whole shouldn't be looking for multi-millionaire supermodels, and the pimply-faced older woman with bad BO will probably be happiest if she doesn't set her goals solely on super-hot CEOs who, in their offtime, model for calenders for charity.

Does that mean that all 4 of the above people aren't super nice? No. Does it mean that they might not get along perfectly? Nope.

It means that their social spheres and expectations are likely to not come into contact with one another.

There's no need to aim low or to "settle" but I think people are happiest if they set their goals on the attainable.

As to your question, it's been my experience that men tend to shoot higher in their expectations than women do. There seems to be a sense of entitlement in men (and I'm generalizing, btw, so simmer down out there) that's missing from the way women view the opposite sex. Men (again, generalizing here) seem to think they *deserve* the hottest chick around, no matter their own personal status.

 

[fgarvb1]

People are people.

Some are luckier than others. Some are made to stand forth to a tougher test thats all.

 

[Bushido71XS]

I think the Roosevelt qoute in my sig area says it nicely.

 

[Lost Cause]

I use it...

As a parallel phrase for a type of person/people I choose not to associate with. Like weak, handwringers that blame everything but their choices for their state of condition. (poor/afraid/race/intelligence/sex) Or general society that waits to be told what style is in/out, what car to drive, what to think, and what is success.

 

[Lancecastor]

How often do you think it happens that a man may think a woman is out of his league and doesn't pursue it, yet she would be interested in him? (or vice versa)


I'm curious to hear others' thoughts on this.

We're interested in hearing more about this guy, so we can help you snag him.

Lance

 

[ExLimey]

The greasy guy with no job and a beer-gut probably on the whole shouldn't be looking for multi-millionaire supermodels

Goddammit! Why didn't anyone clue me in on this before?

 

[erosman]

*snip*
There seems to be a sense of entitlement in men (and I'm generalizing, btw, so simmer down out there) that's missing from the way women view the opposite sex. Men (again, generalizing here) seem to think they *deserve* the hottest chick around, no matter their own personal status.

LMAO

astute observation, Nora

 

[LukkyKnight]

If you're not in the same league it means that subtle differences in the rules of engagement may apply, and the umps probably define a strike differently.

You may, however, still meet in exhibition or playoff games.

 

[Nora]

Goddammit! Why didn't anyone clue me in on this before?

I'm sorry, sugarplum. You didn't ask me before now.

 

[Freya]

I've had people say this to me before, and it totally floors me. I'm not in any league at all - I can't imagine ever considering myself superior to another in a way that I wouldn't speak to them, or be friendly.

But many times I have also considered myself not in someone else's league - in a romantic, physical or intellectual sense. Like I don't measure up to them.








Ugh! Edited because I sounded like a conceited ass, when I meant it the other way around.

 

[Nora]

LMAO

astute observation, Nora

Being old has some benefits. Besides, you didn't think I got this bitter without some help, did you? *grin*

 

[LukkyKnight]

I've had people say this to me before, and it totally floors me. I'm not in any league at all...

Ah, a free agent. The sky's the limit.

 

[ExLimey]

I'm sorry, sugarplum. You didn't ask me before now.

Are we at least allowed designated hitters in this league or am I playing a totally different sport?

 

[kotori]

If you're not in the same league it means that subtle differences in the rules of engagement may apply, and the umps probably define a strike differently.

You may, however, still meet in exhibition or playoff games.

I hate inter-League play in the regular season. It's just plain wrong. Period.

As for the original question, I've heard the phrase used, but mostly in a self-deprecating way, the "other person's" league somehow being higher than the speaker's, and therefore the speaker could not qualify.

 

[islandman]

Minx is out of my league.

 

[tulip2lipservice]

Minxie it all boils down

to insecurity. The person might be afraid that they are not good enough for you. That because you are everything they hold to value in a lover that you might simply leave them and find somebody better than themself. (I am not saying that you would)Is this correct I doubt it, but I have felt this way. I have also had men tell me the same thing. For whatever reason the person might feel that they just can't keep up with a lifestyle they think you are partaking in or what not.

I think when you meet the right person those insecurities will not matter if you both choose to work on them.

I would take it as a compliment.

Peace,
Tulip

 

[Rubyfruit]

You all are out of my league.

 

[LukkyKnight]

You all are out of my league.

Can I get traded into it?