Bad Random Life Tips.

[kurrginatorX]

The whole stigma about killer bees has been overblown. It's okay to approach their nest and gather honey just as long as you tell them what you are doing.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Want to get rid of crime evidence? Stuff the evidence in a luggage and register it for a United Airlines flight. Never see it again!

 

[kurrginatorX]

Alligators and crocodiles are naturally timid creatures. Just approach them with raw meat and they will come to you, allowing you to pet and play with them.

 

[TTawhere]

Wait to do your Christmas shopping until December 26th. Everything will all be on sale then.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Don't know what to get the person who has everything? Fart in a Mason jar and immediately seal it. When the recipient opens it, it's sure to be a conversation piece for Christmases to come.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Wait to do your Christmas shopping until December 26th. Everything will all be on sale then.

This actually works when you don't see half your family until after Christmas...

 

[Sh75]

Take everything posted on Lit seriously and to heart

 

[sally_sparrow]

How can you tell if you’re really allergic to it unless you eat some more?

 

[TTawhere]

This actually works when you don't see half your family until after Christmas...

(Side note : Ouch.)

 

[mnbreastluver]

Bring a festive aroma to your home all season long by filling your humidifier with eggnog.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Eat more beans: America needs the gas (haven't thought of that since the 70s).

 

[kurrginatorX]

Little Johnny and little Susie pissing you off this Holiday season? Beat the shit out of a department store Santa, then tell your kids that YOU are in charge of what presents they get from now on. This tried and true method is sure to curtail your kids' rambunctious natures.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Test your female friends for breast tumors. They’ll appreciate you caring for them

 

[BadAmy]

Never ever ever EVER.....floss.

 

[BrokenBarbie]

When in doubt, whip it out.

 

[Corbal]

If you're tired of having to boil water each night for cooking, freeze bottles of boiling water for future use. Problem solved!

I'm dead.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Take an item that is about to expire and place it in a container without an expiration date to make it last forever!

 

[kurrginatorX]

The next time you go to a burger joint, take one bite and then return it because "It tastes funny." Do this over and over again. Not only will you get full, but in the end you can always ask for a refund.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Baking soda and baking powder are the same thing; this cake is going to be delicious.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Every stereotype you have ever heard is true, so just act accordingly.

 

[fisherfella]

Sure you can smoke while refuelling your car..

 

[mnbreastluver]

Meet a nice girl who agrees to go out with you. Immediately send her dick pics so she knows how awesome your pubic hair looks to distract her from how tiny your penis is. She will love that you are showing vulnerability and immediately want to have sex with you - chicks love it.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Compare the person that you are out with to every person you dated before them. It's a great way to get to know each other.

 

[Polranny]

Compare the person that you are out with to every person you dated before them. It's a great way to get to know each other.

Tell your kids the yellow snow is special and tastes like dairy ice cream

 

[sally_sparrow]

Take advantage of your own gullibility by deluding yourself into believing that you’re not gullible.