Bad Random Life Tips.

[mnbreastluver]

For men: To save money on a tombstone, overdose on Viagara.

 

[done_got_old]

If you don’t want your car to get towed leave your baby in the vehicle!

Really bad!

 

[mnbreastluver]

Really bad!

I was going to go with puppy.

About to be circumcised? Ask if you can keep your foreskin for a tasty treat later!

 

[ToolbeltTom]

Start a nail clippings collection. Wow your friends.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you are afraid the pepper you are about to eat might be too spicy for your mouth, rub the seeds with your fingers and touch your eyeball. You will soon have your answer.

 

[Airka4real]

The forehead is the best place for a tattoo!.

 

[Petulence]

Don't wait until it's too late before you refill the electricity in your outlets. Use a fork or paperclip to test each outlet in your home weekly to make sure there is still electricity in them.

 

[haha_on_me]

Flat tire on the front passenger side of your car? Move it to the back, problem solved, no more flat on the front.

 

[BisonTN]

Out of condoms? Use Cling Wrap!

Out of Condoms? Just turn it inside out and go again!

 

[BisonTN]

Oh, and Bacon grease can get on your clothing when you are cooking it. To avoid stains make sure you cook your bacon while you are naked.

 

[DarkSimian]

Tired of all that grease from fried foods? Just eat that chicken raw, like nature intended

 

[ChainedUp]

The best way to see the sun is to look directly at it.

 

[DarkSimian]

Expiration dates are just a suggestion; I'm sure that milk from last month is still good

 

[lilsarah91]

The mold on that old beef roast sammich is just Penicillin, it's good for you.

 

[DarkSimian]

Post all your personal information on the internet; what's the worse that could happen?

 

[mnbreastluver]

Can’t get enough chocolate milk? Find the nearest dairy farm, borrow a cow, take it home, sneak it into your apartment and feed it all the milk chocolate it can eat. Next day you’ll be swimming in chocolate milk.

 

[Blueeyesrenee]

Post all your personal information on the internet; what's the worse that could happen?

Don't forget your banking and credit card info! And better yet your SSN.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you are the type of person who loses things frequently, start writing your social security number on all of your belongings.

 

[PNWKitten]

Dont worry about your credit score. It doesn't affect your life in any way.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you want silence, record silence and then play it back on a Bluetooth speaker at maximum volume

 

[Sweet_Lara]

Don't run with scissors, you might fall and hurt yourself. Instead, put them in your front pants pocket.

 

[lilsarah91]

Use the metal ring of your car seat belt to open beers while driving

 

[mnbreastluver]

Are you 5’2” tall and want to be 5’10”- 6’ ft. tall? Cut your legs off and get customized prosthetic legs to the height you want!

 

[Illnevertell79]

Never run out of blinker fluid.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Change your name to “not guilty” to not go to prison