As The Hospital Pervs-- It's Overtime Time

[sweepthefloor]

Hello Smiley! Those cute stuffed animals look healthy. I promise that I won't cut them open.

 

[John Doe]

Does that mean yes?

-Yes.

 

[girlsmiley]

Hello Smiley! Those cute stuffed animals look healthy. I promise that I won't cut them open.

I certainly hope not!
That's Sooty on the left, and Sweep on the right.
Sweep was my favourite.

 

[sweepthefloor]

I certainly hope not!
That's Sooty on the left, and Sweep on the right.
Sweep was my favourite.

Are they from television?
I had this cute snoopy, so soft and thin. It had a wind up key, when it played music the head moved knowingly. I can't remember what year I lost it, but it travelled with me for a long time time.

 

[sweepthefloor]

The secret life of stuffed animals: you can tell them your secrets, and sometimes they whisper back. If the animals could write, they would sell a best-seller. All you would have to do is sit in the field and make daisy-chain crowns for kings and queens, while wishing on weeds and finding that four-leaf clover.

 

[sweepthefloor]

Sometimes you have to give the man a chance. I had to pull up a chair next to the bed and hold his hand for one hour. "Patient tolerating wean" "Sedation off"

He kept trying to talk to me over the tube. I told him to stop talking "I don't speak tube language." & "Just be quiet, we are trying to do something in here, save your breath please." He wouldn't let go of my hand, so I just stayed with him. He kept rubbing my hand like a security blanket.

And the tube came out. I took off the wrist restraints. He held out his arms, so I let him hug me. He spoke my name. I was his nurse many times. The daily reality.

And I looked at the Residents who couldn't believe he didn't fail trial (again) and said:

That's how you wean and extubate a patient.​

 

[sweepthefloor]

And just like that the third year is over, and the last ICU rotation is done. He's going to cardiology and the specialty suits him. I felt the pain in my chest when he walked out the door.

 

[sweepthefloor]

People get beat up in prison. I don't know how.
I said to the guards: this person is going to die.
I asked: are you going to call the family?

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

It must seem so pointless at times keeping people alive who are going to die anyway.

 

[sweepthefloor]

It must seem so pointless at times keeping people alive who are going to die anyway.

All people are going to die. Injury and death is often unexpected. The restoration of health is possible, sometimes when it seems impossible. If it were never possible we wouldn't be doing anything at all.

It's never pointless whether you watch a person patch up and walk out happy on one leg, or you ease someone to their end-death, final breath~ It is never pointless.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

It pay the bills.

 

[sweepthefloor]

It pays more than the bills. It deposits and deducts from the hearts bank account. There is no predictable variance. It's a risk we take by going to work everyday.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

And hopefully a 401K.

 

[sweepthefloor]

And hopefully a 401K.

I don't plan for tomorrow. I could die tonight. I think they take money from my check and put it somewhere, but where I don't care. I am sure someone will figure it out when it's time to bury me in the ground.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

It must seem so pointless at times keeping people alive who are going to die anyway.

All people are going to die. Injury and death is often unexpected. The restoration of health is possible, sometimes when it seems impossible. If it were never possible we wouldn't be doing anything at all.

It's never pointless whether you watch a person patch up and walk out happy on one leg, or you ease someone to their end-death, final breath~ It is never pointless.

I don't plan for tomorrow. I could die tonight. I think they take money from my check and put it somewhere, but where I don't care. I am sure someone will figure it out when it's time to bury me in the ground.

You're on the verge of getting it.

 

[sweepthefloor]

You're on the verge of getting it.

not really.

 

[Balladeer08]

not really.

We need to define what "it" she is or is not on the verge of getting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GysVngf7GrE

 

[sweepthefloor]

We need to define what "it" she is or is not on the verge of getting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GysVngf7GrE

That is a cute funny video.
When I am fed clues, I am always of the cusp of getting it.
When I am fed jokes, I am always on the verge of getting it.

I am a disappointment when I stare with the blank face of misunderstanding.

 

[pete]

All people are going to die. Injury and death is often unexpected. The restoration of health is possible, sometimes when it seems impossible. If it were never possible we wouldn't be doing anything at all.

It's never pointless whether you watch a person patch up and walk out happy on one leg, or you ease someone to their end-death, final breath~ It is never pointless.

god bless you, Janey McSexy

 

[sweepthefloor]

god bless you, Janey McSexy

A third year leaving this summer resident said: If I am ever sick, I want you to be my nurse. I told him when he is done his fellowship in cardiology to come find me, and I will work for him.

It's not easy, and sometimes we get tired and that is when we rely on each other to get the job done right. "It's time to turn."

It's a complex dynamic and I hope my blessing to be: when it's my turn to die, my nurse will take me home, and up the morphine titrating for gasping, not letting me suffer with air hunger.

Because: I never let you lay in crap, and when the crap wouldn't come out I got it out with my fingers piece by piece, and dignity was maintained through it all.

 

[sweepthefloor]

Thursday was a sore throat, and I worked through the shift. I didn't have a fever.

Friday was a real raspy, deep throated spoken word shift, sultry is the name of this sound game.

I couldn't resist speaking with this joy of my new voice. The struggle for each sound, the breathy beauty of it all, and he called me.

I was finishing up a Rapid Response for a change in mental status, and waiting for the stretcher to whisk us away to the CT scanner. The charge nurse phone rang in my pocket. I said: Hello. He said: Hello.

I asked him: How did you know to call this phone number to find me?
He replied: I called the ICU, and the secretary transferred me to this number.

He is bold.

Decisions were being made outside the medical room. The patient had a seizure. The patient was lethargic, and post-ictal. For the first time in my work life, I stayed in the room with him on the phone. I didn't care if they wanted the patient on telemetry or in critical care. I didn't go out to the hallway and fight for 'no critical care admit, we have no beds, the patient is stable.'

He asked: What are you doing?
I replied: Did you hear the RRT being called?
He: Yes, I am in clinic.
Me: Well you know where I am.
He: What happened to your voice?
Me: I lost it, you stole it from me on the last day of your ICU rotation.

The stretcher arrived and I had to hang up. I took the patient to the CT scanner, and then I took the patient to the telemetry floor. After that, I went back to ICU.

I paged him to my phone. I hid in the pantry and listened to his voice. I whisper rasped each word, and it delighted me.

We talked about cardiology and his dream. I am happy for his pursuit and the work he has done to get there. I said my heart, my heart is beating fast.

He asked: Are you in SVT?
I said: Yes.
He: Do you need adenosine?
Me: Your face is the adenosine.

I wouldn't hang up. He said the nurses need me. I said that they don't need me.

Me: You need me.

 

[sweepthefloor]

I just realized there is overtime to be worked, papers to write, and certification classes to attend in one week. The next week is just as busy. I am lost in a sea of numbers and variance. Where is the love?

 

[gotsnowgotslush]

Love is always waiting to kidnap and abduct you, when you are not paying attention. Love is a stalker ?

 

[sweepthefloor]

Love is always waiting to kidnap and abduct you, when you are not paying attention. Love is a stalker ?

I can't be stalked. I hide behind the Ivy in front of the bathroom window naked. I sneak in between the minutes and the agenda recording. I am a shadow behind the curtain in an open ICU whispering: wake up.

Love can't see me. It is blind. Remember?

Some people love so much, there is no space in the to be loved back.

 

[John Doe]

I just realized there is overtime to be worked, papers to write, and certification classes to attend in one week. The next week is just as busy. I am lost in a sea of numbers and variance. Where is the love?

I love opioids. Got any spare ones lying around?