are orgasms humiliating?

[StarlitLillith]

Having an orgasm is never humiliating...atleast not to me. I don't really care who hears me, when it happens, or how....it's the best feeling, or atleast one of them, in the entire world. I love the loss of control and the complete revelling in pain. I love it. It's one of the least humiliating experiences I've ever had.

 

[Pure]

i think the potential of orgasms to produce embarrassment and/or humiliation is not often explored. this, because of the circumstances, not the physical reaction per se. for instance, picture having to jill off--before a few onlookers-- in front of a picture of Daddy, suitably altered to show a large erection.

 

[Blushing Bottom]

Obviously you've never seen me cum

I cum in colours...everywhere.

She combs her hair...

oops...

d

nope sorry...

~

loss of self control.
crude, animalistic jerking and grunting.


i find them so...

anyone else?

 

[graceanne]

I don't really worry about it, since K makes weird faces and stuff when he cum's too.

 

[marieR19]

Actually, this has been a big issue for me, and one of the reasons why I have never had an orgasm. I purposely stop things when I feel it's getting too close to that point, because I'm scared to have an orgasm. The loss of control, the sensations... okay, I've never had one, but I've read so much that it scares me to think about it. And what if I make gross/animalistic sounds when it happens, and my SO gets weirded out? Just, so many questions/insecurities.


Heather

 

[Andraste]

Actually, this has been a big issue for me, and one of the reasons why I have never had an orgasm. I purposely stop things when I feel it's getting too close to that point, because I'm scared to have an orgasm. The loss of control, the sensations... okay, I've never had one, but I've read so much that it scares me to think about it. And what if I make gross/animalistic sounds when it happens, and my SO gets weirded out? Just, so many questions/insecurities.


Heather

thank you for replying

for me, i know that men find it a huge turn on to see women like that...it's just for myself. am i making sense? not sure...

i can orgasm alone but there's an element of self disgust.

even more strange, i love to fake orgasms.
i love being in total control of my body, and i love my partner being turned on by the noises & movements.

yes, dishonest.

 

[Andraste]

it's the best feeling, or atleast one of them, in the entire world.

i guess it's like some people not being into chocolate and others being chocoholics.

orgasms just release a tension. they don't feel especially pleasurable.

 

[WriterDom]

i guess it's like some people not being into chocolate and others being chocoholics.

orgasms just release a tension. they don't feel especially pleasurable.

It runs a gambit. I've had 3 or 4 women scream bloody murder for 5 minutes at the top of their lungs during phone sex. To the point I had to hold the phone away from my ear. God knows what their neighbors were thinking. Some women gush like Niagara Falls. Some, you can barely tell they are having one.

I do believe this. You can take a vanilla woman. With an interest in bdsm. And introduce her to a Dom and have her orgasms go from mild to through the roof. For a lot of them anyway. Everyone is different ya know.

 

[intothewoods]

for me, i know that men find it a huge turn on to see women like that...it's just for myself. am i making sense? not sure...

i can orgasm alone but there's an element of self disgust.

even more strange, i love to fake orgasms.
i love being in total control of my body, and i love my partner being turned on by the noises & movements.

yes, dishonest.

I completely understand where you're coming from, and can relate, though to a lesser degree. I definitely have always felt an element of shame associated with masturbation. I didn't do it at all until I was about 20, and even then, I was loathe to admit it. Only pretty recently have I been able to talk about it. And it's still kind of hard.

I was talking to some friends of mine recently, and was quite explicit about sex, but once we started to discuss masturbation, I turned bright red and could NOT say the word for the life of me. My friend looked at me like I was nuts and said - so you can talk about butt plugs, but you can't admit that you masturbate?

If I trust someone, I am most definitely able to let go and enjoy orgasms. Although -- and I think this seems close to what you are talking about but to a lesser degree -- I can easily have and enjoy an orgasm if my partner hasn't cum yet, but if he already has, it's almost impossible for me to cum. If he's not getting off, it's like...what's the point? Intellectually, I think it's ridiculous, but that's the way I am.

 

[StarlitLillith]

orgasms just release a tension. they don't feel especially pleasurable.

Maybe not to you...but to a majority of people they do.

 

[Andraste]

this makes me want to be forced to orgasm...

forced to give up that final piece of myself, and to become nothing but his toy for that moment.

...this thought makes me want to disgust myself some more.

 

[BiBunny]

It runs a gambit. I've had 3 or 4 women scream bloody murder for 5 minutes at the top of their lungs during phone sex. To the point I had to hold the phone away from my ear. God knows what their neighbors were thinking. Some women gush like Niagara Falls. Some, you can barely tell they are having one.

I do believe this. You can take a vanilla woman. With an interest in bdsm. And introduce her to a Dom and have her orgasms go from mild to through the roof. For a lot of them anyway. Everyone is different ya know.

This is me. I orgasm easily, can have small to moderate orgasms, one right after the other, with very little effort on anyone's part. It takes someone who can crawl inside my head and touch on my darkest needs to give me the unbelievable ones, though. I'm a masochist to some extent, but I don't crave the pain for its own sake. I crave it because it takes pain to give me that kind of amazing pleasure that I need.

 

[bridgeburner]

hmmm...

well i think it might be the source of my inability to orgasm unless alone.
i just can't let go to that degree.

i was just curious to see if other people found it humiliating...whether that's good or bad.

I think whether it's good or bad depends on the person. If it matters to you then it's bad. If it causes difficulty in your life, it's bad. I try not to stress over it too much. I'm aware I have trust and intimacy issues. So I'm not a perfect person. There are worse problems to have.

 

[flirty551]

My very first orgasm brougth on by another person was quite embarrasing and humiliating since it was forced on me... but it was very, very intense.

 

[FurryFury]

Are orgasms humiliating? With a trusted lover, no. Since he takes such pleasure to watching and feeling me orgasm.

When forced, derided, with more than just my lover, then yes. I am not an exhibitionist.

Given my own preferences, the lights would be off a lot of the time. I'm shy. I don't particularly want my body or orgasm seen. He likes to watch. So, the lights stay on.

Fury

 

[WriterDom]

Are orgasms humiliating? With a trusted lover, no. Since he takes such pleasure to watching and feeling me orgasm.

When forced, derided, with more than just my lover, then yes. I am not an exhibitionist.

Given my own preferences, the lights would be off a lot of the time. I'm shy. I don't particularly want my body or orgasm seen. He likes to watch. So, the lights stay on.

Fury

But at the time do you think about it? Wouldn't the shame come later and not during? Or is there a conscious effort to "tone it down"

I guess with kids within ear shot that would always be a consideration. But in a remote cabin wouldn't it feel good to howl like the feral wanton bitch you are?

 

[FurryFury]

But at the time do you think about it? Wouldn't the shame come later and not during? Or is there a conscious effort to "tone it down"

I guess with kids within ear shot that would always be a consideration. But in a remote cabin wouldn't it feel good to howl like the feral wanton bitch you are?

I might think about it at the time and then shove the thought down and instead flood myself with D/s thoughts and at the same time focus on sensation.

There is no conscious effort to tone it down.

With kids in the house, I might audibly "tone it down", that's hard to say because for as long as we've been together there has almost always been some reason to be quiet. In fact, for a long as I've been having sex that's been true.

Me a ferral wanton bitch? My how you see me Sir. *blushes*

I'm not a howler. I make the most noise when he's really putting it to me and he comes.

Fury

 

[WriterDom]

I'm not a howler. I make the most noise when he's really putting it me and he comes.

Fury

Is there an orgasm equivalent when he cums in your mouth, ass, or pussy?

 

[FurryFury]

Is there an orgasm equivalent when he cums in your mouth, ass, or pussy?

I'm not sure I understand your meaning. I will say that I often feel his orgasm as if it is my own. I'd also rather him come than me if one of us isn't and I have to pick.

Fury

 

[intothewoods]

I'm not a howler. I make the most noise when he's really putting it me and he comes.

Fury

Damn, Fury, that's hot!

 

[FurryFury]

Damn, Fury, that's hot!

*smiles*

I'm glad you think so.

I relax and enjoy his orgasm as my own more than I do my own. Not that I'd like to give up either one. Hell, more all around I say!

Fury

 

[sandraxdav]

i had a previous relationship where orgasms were all one way..his.now my current partner ,to be honest i used to hold back with him ,eventually i gave in to him and let go,and im so glad i did,seemingly i can occaisonally be loud and messy lol,but seeing the look on his face after he has made me come,makes it worthwhile

 

[intothewoods]

*smiles*

I'm glad you think so.

I relax and enjoy his orgasm as my own more than I do my own. Not that I'd like to give up either one. Hell, more all around I say!

Fury

I wouldn't say I enjoy my partner's more than my own, but...well, it's just different. And it is definitely satisfying in its own right.

 

[petes478]

Humiliation/Degradation experienced upon orgasm...

Her bottom was blushing as she came and sat on my face. She felt my hot breath on her inner thighs as my tongue began its journey up into her slick, tight, shaved, pussy. She drenched my tongue as I moved it up into her inner folds, and I twirled her clit around, and around, and around, and around, and around, in my mouth, between my teeth, licking her, biting her, sucking her as she ground her pussy down on my tongue and face. Her hips began to buck, and her quim filled with more warm fluid, her belly started to shake and her ass quaked, as she exploded in full orgasm as I licked and serviced her. She reached behind herself to grab hold hungrily of my large, wide, thick, long, stiff enormous erection and pulled it to her. I placed her on all fours and entered her pussy swiftly and forcefully from behind, while slapping my buxom blonde's wench-like behind, as I rammed her hard and fast, hard and fast, ramming her like an animal from behind.

Feelings of Humiliation and Degradation are optional.

 

[Gilkane]

For those of you who have a problem with lose of control and find orgasming humilating, I have to say that carnal pleasure is to be shared either with a partner or oneself.

When lovers are truly interested in making the other pleased and satisfied you really have to check into your own mind and determined where and what that is.

For Andraste you have control issues outside sex, you must be incontrol of yourself at all times, I believe you are even embarrassed about natural bowl movements and make an extra effort to not use public rest rooms and the sort. You also probably perfer a movie in the DvD player over going out to dinner and a movie with your lover.

That being said here is something for you to try, instead of crying out and grunting and growning, take deep deep breaths, oxygen is the key, first it will make the orgasmic experience much more powerful, second it will give you a way to control yourself right up to that last second when you release. you see when you get into the pleasuring throws of near orgasm you begin normally to forget to breath you go into a series of short sharp breaths, whats happening is your depriving your body of air, that heady fealing you feel is not the swoons of an orgasm approaching its you becoming oxygen deprived. When the brain become deprived of oxygen it shuts down higher brain functions and concentrates on the base functions and the reason for the lack of oxygen so what happens is it shoots hormones into you system to make you orgasm faster, not necessarily better, thats where the lose of control happens.

Take deep deep breaths, all sex organs operate on blood flow, the richer the oxygen flow the less the heart has to pump the more higher functions your brain can maintain. And the more powerful your orgasm will be. So you see if you can achieve this deep breath technque you may find yourself less humilated by your lose of control, and more incontrol of your orgasm and perhaps you might be able to not only learn to enjoy the orgasms you give yourself but one day truly orgasm for your partner.

Try tell us what happens, if it fails, try again till you get it right.