Another date...

[cjh]

if he's not into kabuki, he's not worth a damn anyway.

 

[capricious_chic]

For you.

Can we still do it in my head though?

Fuck yeah. In every possible dirty way imaginable.

 

[LukkyKnight]

...Let's see if we click at all before worrying if there is a potential love match.

Bah.

Exactly. One shouldn't screen all one's new friends of the gender in question based on suitability as a life-mate.

On the other hand, if they've gotten to the point of stating they no longer read that would signal such a disparity of natures as to be unlikely to become much of a friend to me.

 

[LukkyKnight]

if he's not into kabuki, he's not worth a damn anyway.

Use of the word kabuki has been known to conjure Harbinger's presence.

Just sayin'​

 

[AlecBond]

abcde

 

[Adrenaline]

It's like people have forgotten how to date. I blame the internet and the accelerated friendships that can happen. The only thing one should concern themselves with is being a good date. Taking a couple hours and being the best date one can be, having fun and laughing.

I had one guy that had a laundry list of questions geared to determine if I was possible relationship material. Who cares? I mean, is it really a huge waste of time to put that aside and just have a good time? Let's see if we click at all before worrying if there is a potential love match.

Bah.

Whoa, that would have me running in the opposite direction. Anyone going out with an agenda is an immediate turn off.

I agree, it's all about having fun. Which is partly why I toughed it out for so long rather than using the go-to-bathroom-call-friend-to-tell-her-to-return-it-with-an-"emergency"-call maneuver. Everyone says something dumb from time to time, you know? But all of that stuff in one date was a bit much.

 

[Adrenaline]

if he's not into kabuki, he's not worth a damn anyway.

Kabuki would send him running away holding his balls trying to protect his manhood.

 

[Igor_1066]

Kabuki would send him running away holding his balls trying to protect his manhood.

Now I'm confused. What about kabuki would he find emasculating, and how would he know it?

 

[Igor_1066]

I see comments like that a lot here.... I wish I could believe that looks are as unimportant as people claim they are. I guess a lifetime of hearing,
"you're so nice.... you're such a good friend to me. I wish I could talk to (insert name of asshole husband/boyfriend here) like I can talk to you," has left me a little skeptical.

As one who has spent much of his life overlooking the obvious, I don't hesitate to point out that looks, and much more importantly "the look", are subject to improvement through study and practice.

 

[Adrenaline]

Now I'm confused. What about kabuki would he find emasculating, and how would he know it?

All that make-up and fabulous costumes.

 

[watergirl]

not too picky

Back in October, a guy I've known as a friend of friends acquaintance for over a year finally asked me out. We had a good friendly time, but -

He's afraid of flying, he's had a life-long fear of power tools & injuring his hands, and he didn't even try to give me a good night kiss when he dropped me off.

I decided he just doesn't have the balls for me to really get into him, so I told him as nicely as I could the next time he asked me out, after some e-mail conversations, that we just weren't hitting it off the way I'd hoped I would, and that things were really busy, but thanks.

I loaned him a couple books, so I'll have to get those back at some point. Nice guy, just too bland for me. My roommates bf claims that if he'd tried to get into my pants, I might have respected him more. *shrug*

 

[ccnyman]

Oh, it always starts out that way. Then next thing you know the bossy boots thing comes out. In bed, that can be all kinds of fun. As I'm driving down the street - not so much.

No, I can see that not being fun at all. I never actually went for that older guy being better myth even though I am older. A guy, no matter what age, needs to respect the woman and let her make her choices. It's hard though, if you're as jealous as I am, and can lead to a bit of unpleasantness for both.

 

[ccnyman]

It's like people have forgotten how to date. I blame the internet and the accelerated friendships that can happen. The only thing one should concern themselves with is being a good date. Taking a couple hours and being the best date one can be, having fun and laughing.

I had one guy that had a laundry list of questions geared to determine if I was possible relationship material. Who cares? I mean, is it really a huge waste of time to put that aside and just have a good time? Let's see if we click at all before worrying if there is a potential love match.

Bah.

And getting to know each other and the excitement of seeing if there's anything there.

 

[DV81]

Whoa, that would have me running in the opposite direction. Anyone going out with an agenda is an immediate turn off.

its hard to believe no one has an agenda when dating. For both genders, there are expectations.

 

[an_angels_wings]

This is kinda' true. You know, you're expecting (or at least hoping) to have a good time, to not be treated like dirt. Or something like that. Of course, those expectations could just be considered part of normal social discourse and whatnot. Eh, who knows?

 

[Adrenaline]

its hard to believe no one has an agenda when dating. For both genders, there are expectations.

Expectations are different than agendas, to my mind. Expectations are things like good hygiene, good conversationalist, a brain and all those other things that will allow the couple to have a good time. Agendas are--I'm looking for a husband, wife, lifetime slave and animal lover who wants to have 6 children. Such people have the list mentally printed out in clean black print and scrutinize each potential mate against it.

First dates, especially, are way way way too soon to be consciously thinking about "where this may lead". It's a first date!

 

[DV81]

First dates, especially, are way way way too soon to be consciously thinking about "where this may lead". It's a first date!

true, but by the 4th date, the couple must think "we have chemistry, where will this lead to?"

On a first date it should be fun and observing each other to see if there is compatibility.

 

[BalticBeauty]

a cool lady thread

I've found this old thread and liked it much (except for the off-topic), both the IP and the discussion.. such a nice, sensible ladies' talk on how things are in life..
brought me memories of the characters I met..I'm smiling)

Agree ona lla these

I have friends who aren't big readers but are very intelligent, curious sorts, they simply channel it differently. <...>For some reason I always get the weirdos.

I know but I've been trying to be a nicer person...since summer. Give people a chance, don't be so picky, be more understanding, try not to be so dismissive. Bad, bad idea.

I'm fairly flexible on physical qualities. As long as the guy looks healthy and is well-groomed (and taller than me, ha) I am good to go. Especially if these are combined with intellect, curiousity, open-mindedness, a taste for sarcasm and argument and he is able to give it as hard I do. <...>Basically I like a challenge.