freescorfr
Awaiting autumn harvests
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raindancer said:
Well said, raindancer, all of it.
Age Diversity and Online Relationships
- Thread starter Dhalgren
- Start date
Well said, raindancer, all of it.
JennyOmanHill
trying hard to be mindful
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I have never been good at "guessing" ages of anyone, either online or off. The online experience for me has been incredibly liberating since, yes, without the physical sense of the person as the initial introduction, it allows me to discover a person without a preconceived notion.
It strikes me funny, however, that even online, I tend to relate more to people within my age bracket. Laurel, I agree that it has something to do with sharing similiar experiences through the different decades.
I have found that men I meet are more intimidated by my age in offline situations than online here at LIT. Many times after chatting with someone at a bar, age becomes a topic (probably because of the references we refer to as "likes" and "dislikes"). I've seen many faces go into shock when they realize I'm as old as their mother!
It strikes me funny, however, that even online, I tend to relate more to people within my age bracket. Laurel, I agree that it has something to do with sharing similiar experiences through the different decades.
I have found that men I meet are more intimidated by my age in offline situations than online here at LIT. Many times after chatting with someone at a bar, age becomes a topic (probably because of the references we refer to as "likes" and "dislikes"). I've seen many faces go into shock when they realize I'm as old as their mother!
kotori
Fool of Fortune
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Studs
But I'm learning some of the new songs.
My father-in-law is 74. His wife, my step-mother-in-law (is that really a term?) is 43. They only been married 10 years, but it seems to be working nicely. They make up new songs.
Studs is the man. That quote is so on target. I left the Cobain reference in because I had never heard of him (although I had heard of the band) until his suicide hit the Nightly News.Laurel said:
But I'm learning some of the new songs.
My father-in-law is 74. His wife, my step-mother-in-law (is that really a term?) is 43. They only been married 10 years, but it seems to be working nicely. They make up new songs.
Last edited:
freescorfr
Awaiting autumn harvests
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Re: Studs
How did he manage that Kotori? I'd like some lessons. Do you have to be able to write songs? Will writing bullshit do?
kotori said:
How did he manage that Kotori? I'd like some lessons. Do you have to be able to write songs? Will writing bullshit do?
riff
Jose Jones
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2 different age discussions going on here? I think I can see it.
As I have stated before, in so many ways- emotionally especially- I am a baby.
On April 17, the earth will have travelled 39 times around the sun through space. In so many ways this is an insignificant detail- 39 tips around the sun, 39 stolls around the park. It's all relative.
Each of us is taking a stoll. It may take someone 20 trips to notice what took one to notice in 35.
The friend I spend the most time with is 24 years old and is dating a man who is 41. They seem to get along very well. Incidently, like me, he has never married and has no children. She knows that, as her friend, all I want for her is to grow, to find happiness and peace in her life, and to do and accomplish the things that she thinks she wants to do. Her relationship with him is part of that. Her relationship with me is part of that. They get along splendidly so far as I can see. She's my friend. I love her, now go away!
My only concern for her is.... I was going to say that my only concern is that he will try to change her into what he wants to be, that he will try to CONTROL her. I have told her this. But she loves him and there are whisperings of marriage. From my outside point of view, and to her father who resents the entire relationship (he is a dear friend of mine), I have said: It's what she wants, he appears to be very good to her, she is 24 years old, and _________, she could be doing a hell of a lot worse.
I have accepted the fact that if she loves him and marries him and moves away, my dear sweet friend will be, in a word, gone. I remember saying to my best friend in Jacksonville, FL as when I announced that I was leaving: If I don't leave first, you will. I hate being left behind.
Laurel does however have a point. Laurel, if I may contribute or follow your vein, age does seem to make a difference. Seemliness is an issue. Things should fit and seemliness is a big part of that. I am not talking about mere sex, as I can fuck a 19 year old just as adeptly as I can fuck a 45 year old. No biggie there- it's all good. But culturally being able to relate stands for something.
I told a woman-friend of mine, 66 years old and marvelously beautiful in mind, body, and spirit, that if it were not for our ages, I could easily fall in love with her. She hugged me- it was one of those hugs where when I was finished, she wasn't- she held on. So I stayed in the hug until she let go.
I want a woman who can tolerate me banging my head to Kittie, The Cult, Pixies, RHCP, and ad infinitum. I want a woman who can listen to Johnny Hartman and John Coltrane and feel the ache of years. I want a woman who will listen to the Glenn Miller Orchestra play Moonlight Serenade and hold each other in our arms and sway to a different time.
And when we fuck, we fuck together.
This is a very interesting thread (and I hope people understand that writing is a form of thinking).
As I have stated before, in so many ways- emotionally especially- I am a baby.
On April 17, the earth will have travelled 39 times around the sun through space. In so many ways this is an insignificant detail- 39 tips around the sun, 39 stolls around the park. It's all relative.
Each of us is taking a stoll. It may take someone 20 trips to notice what took one to notice in 35.
The friend I spend the most time with is 24 years old and is dating a man who is 41. They seem to get along very well. Incidently, like me, he has never married and has no children. She knows that, as her friend, all I want for her is to grow, to find happiness and peace in her life, and to do and accomplish the things that she thinks she wants to do. Her relationship with him is part of that. Her relationship with me is part of that. They get along splendidly so far as I can see. She's my friend. I love her, now go away!
My only concern for her is.... I was going to say that my only concern is that he will try to change her into what he wants to be, that he will try to CONTROL her. I have told her this. But she loves him and there are whisperings of marriage. From my outside point of view, and to her father who resents the entire relationship (he is a dear friend of mine), I have said: It's what she wants, he appears to be very good to her, she is 24 years old, and _________, she could be doing a hell of a lot worse.
I have accepted the fact that if she loves him and marries him and moves away, my dear sweet friend will be, in a word, gone. I remember saying to my best friend in Jacksonville, FL as when I announced that I was leaving: If I don't leave first, you will. I hate being left behind.
Laurel does however have a point. Laurel, if I may contribute or follow your vein, age does seem to make a difference. Seemliness is an issue. Things should fit and seemliness is a big part of that. I am not talking about mere sex, as I can fuck a 19 year old just as adeptly as I can fuck a 45 year old. No biggie there- it's all good. But culturally being able to relate stands for something.
I told a woman-friend of mine, 66 years old and marvelously beautiful in mind, body, and spirit, that if it were not for our ages, I could easily fall in love with her. She hugged me- it was one of those hugs where when I was finished, she wasn't- she held on. So I stayed in the hug until she let go.
I want a woman who can tolerate me banging my head to Kittie, The Cult, Pixies, RHCP, and ad infinitum. I want a woman who can listen to Johnny Hartman and John Coltrane and feel the ache of years. I want a woman who will listen to the Glenn Miller Orchestra play Moonlight Serenade and hold each other in our arms and sway to a different time.
And when we fuck, we fuck together.
This is a very interesting thread (and I hope people understand that writing is a form of thinking).
Calamity Jane
Reverend Blue Jeans
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- Sep 19, 2001
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Re: I'll try again...
Ohhh!!! You were being metaphorical! Silly me.
I got whatcha meant darlin, and you're right to an extent. But what happens when we don't know the songs of our own age/culture?
Laurel said:I'm using music as an example, but what I'm really saying is that the cultural experience of each generation is unique. When you talk to your buddies your age, there's a connection there that is not there between people much younger or much older. That's not something that can be changed - it just is. Make sense?
Ohhh!!! You were being metaphorical! Silly me.
I got whatcha meant darlin, and you're right to an extent. But what happens when we don't know the songs of our own age/culture?
MaxSebastian
Literotica Guru
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- Feb 6, 2001
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- 536
Well, I may be stating the obvious, but I think society has been conditioning us for years to stick with people our own age by keeping us in age groups at school. Sure, you have to do it that way to ensure everyone of all ages learns everything, but that's where it stems from.
I've met someone who is completely fantastic and four years older than I am - and at first, it was a slight issue, because I've only been out of the education system for a year - I'm just not used to the social mixing of ages because of what has happened to me all through school.
It's no longer an issue to me - I was sitting in a bar in Soho the other night and one of my friends there was 7 years older than me, going out with a friend of mine who is my age while everyone else around that table was going out with people of at least five years' difference.
I think the internet has taken away some of the social stigma we've inherited from the school system, but I think the further you get away from school, the more accepting you get about it.
I met my sweetheart through the internet, but my friends didn't. So it's not necessarily the internet that does it - it just simplifies and eases the process of adjusting away from our conditioning.
Pardon my babbling... I'm meeting her IRL for the first time tomorrow... v.excited!
I've met someone who is completely fantastic and four years older than I am - and at first, it was a slight issue, because I've only been out of the education system for a year - I'm just not used to the social mixing of ages because of what has happened to me all through school.
It's no longer an issue to me - I was sitting in a bar in Soho the other night and one of my friends there was 7 years older than me, going out with a friend of mine who is my age while everyone else around that table was going out with people of at least five years' difference.
I think the internet has taken away some of the social stigma we've inherited from the school system, but I think the further you get away from school, the more accepting you get about it.
I met my sweetheart through the internet, but my friends didn't. So it's not necessarily the internet that does it - it just simplifies and eases the process of adjusting away from our conditioning.
Pardon my babbling... I'm meeting her IRL for the first time tomorrow... v.excited!
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