Abs for Popess

[Guest]

methinks there could be worse places to start than with the new archbishop of england!

Oooh, you say that now, eh???

Ok, yer back in again.

First of all, you have to bow before me.

 

[dreampilot79]

Too late, I have excommunicated you. (See above).

damn story of my life.. day late and a dollar short!!!!.... looks down... hey whats that about short?

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Will that be pronounced Poop-ess? Then she's got my vote!

Speaking of excommunication, this slag is outta here...dissin the Pope. Harumph! I'm also throwing in an exorcism for extra precaution.

I had high hopes for her but..........look at her AV, Mary Magdalene she's not...she's not even fit to be the whore of Babelon.

 

[dreampilot79]

Oooh, you say that now, eh???

Ok, yer back in again.

First of all, you have to bow before me.

bows before her... hell why not.. get a better view up her skirt from down here anyway....

now what was that I had to do with my tongue?

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Must I in that case get out the tape measure... hmmmm how many inches is small anyway?

Dreampilot,

You are misconstruing (and possibly misconscrewing) what I warned you not to characterize as "small." That was the donation, not the Aspergillum substitute.

You are measuring the wrong statistic.



Joe Wordsworth,

Would not our faith in your non participation on this thread be more substantiated if your post had remained absent?

 

[dreampilot79]

Dreampilot,

You are misconstruing (and possibly misconscrewing) what I warned you not to characterize as "small." That was the donation, not the Aspergillum substitute.

You are measuring the wrong statistic.



Joe Wordsworth,

Would not our faith in your non participation on this thread be more substantiated if your post had remained absent?

VB... understood... however I'm talking about what I WANT to donate.. and money ain't it!!!!!

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Joe Wordsworth,

Would not our faith in your non participation on this thread be more substantiated if your post had remained absent?

I have nothing intelligent to say about yours or anyone else's "faith in [my] non participation". I do have a peference that I not be brought up, the preference being stated here (where it is likely to be read by the author of the post bringing me up in a manner I find offensive) is a far stretch from participating in the spirit of the thread.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Dreampilot,

What’s this? What’s This?

Now you want to be a Bishop. Is this INSTEAD of being the Aspergillum substitute, or in addition?

That will probably cost you a large additional donation, and definitely change the appearance of the Mass.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

. . . I do have a peference that I not be brought up, the preference being stated here (where it is likely to be read by the author of the post bringing me up in a manner I find offensive) . . . .

Ah ha! Now I see what you are getting at.

Okay! I will put you in the cue to be the first Martyr to be named by Her Holiness, Popess Abstruse I.



Psst! If you want to speed things up, it would help if you died soon.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Here's who I'm up against....pffft.


EUROPE


ENNIO ANTONELLI, 68, archbishop of Florence, Italy. A popular religious scholar in Italy. Loves the fine arts. Yeah, he draws naked women and calls them all Madonna.


GODFRIED DANNEELS, 71, archbishop of Mechlin-Brussels, Belgium. Considered a long shot, but popular with cardinals who prefer less top-down Vatican authority. NO that's TopLESS...he's not going to vespers, he sneaks out and goes to topless bars.


JOSEPH RATZINGER, turns 78 on April 16, German, the dean of the College of Cardinals. A tough critic of progressive Roman Catholics. Talked of as a transitional candidate for a shorter pontificate after Pope John Paul.
A german Pope....yes that'll happen.

GIOVANNI BATTISTA RE, 71, a Vatican official who until recently was in charge of bishops. Specialized in working with Latin America.
Former guacho who couldn't round up his cattle but they put him in charge of the bishops.

ANGELO SCOLA, 63, patriarch of Venice, Italy. Popular among cardinals who want to return the papacy to Italy and prefer a tough follower of Pope John Paul's ideas. Can you say Kiss Ass?


DIONIGI TETTAMANZI, 71, archbishop of Milan, Italy. A widely published theologian. Strict on doctrine, but an advocate for the poor. Boring Old Fart.


LATIN AMERICA


JORGE MARIO BERGOGLIO, 68, archbishop of Buenos Aires, Argentina. A Jesuit priest who combines a scholarly background with concern for the Third World. I'll give him that much, but he also used to give tours to Evita's grave as a kid for centavos.


CLAUDIO HUMMES, 70, archbishop of Sao Paulo, Brazil. A Franciscan priest, strong on interfaith relations and the needs of the poor. Try borrowing a couple Lira from him.


OSCAR ANDRES RODRIGUEZ MARADIAGA, 62, archbishop of Tegucigalpa, Honduras. A Salesian priest, talented linguist and top Latin American church leader. A strong advocate for the poor. I'm not even touching this one.


JAIME LUCAS ORTEGA Y ALAMINO, 68, archbishop of St. Cristobal, Havana, Cuba. Well thought of for expanding the Cuban church in tough times. Special interest in working with youth.
Working with youth.......anyone else see a red flag here?

AFRICA


FRANCIS ARINZE, 72, Nigerian, a Vatican official. For many years, the top Catholic leader from Africa. An expert on interfaith relations.
There will never be a 'colored' pope.

 

[Guest]

HA! Good luck!




















Fuck knows you'll need it.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Ah ha! Now I see what you are getting at.

Okay! I will put you in the cue to be the first Martyr to be named by Her Holiness, Popess Abstruse I.



Psst! If you want to speed things up, it would help if you died soon.

Again, I would very much prefer to just be left out of it. I'm sure I mentioned that somewhere earlier. It'd be merely polite to accept that on face value. Thank you.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Again, I would very much prefer to just be left out of it. I'm sure I mentioned that somewhere earlier. It'd be merely polite to accept that on face value. Thank you.

I was going to give you your own car and a pass for free movies.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Her Holiness is out for the day....all new job applications must be submitted for approval.

Have a Blessed day.

 

[Guest]

Her Holiness is out for the day....all new job applications must be submitted for approval.

Have a Blessed day.

Kissing your ring goodbye...

 

[Samandiriel]

Kissing your ring goodbye...

Slut.

Your Holyrollerness, can I be a bouncer in the Vatican?

 

[NoJo]

Slut.

Your Holyrollerness, can I be a bouncer in the Vatican?

I'd advise against it, those marble floors are pretty hard and cold.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

I’ve had a busy day at Vatican XXX.

I’ve started putting up “This Way to The Egress!” signs on all the exits from the Papal Throne Room, uncrating a load of Her Holiness, Popess Abstruse I TP, and oiling the ballcock in the Throne Reservoir.

Time to go home and read a Good Book, Abstruse’s Epistle to the Literoticans.

http://www.janicewise.com/mc1790a.jpg​

 

[Samandiriel]

I'd advise against it, those marble floors are pretty hard and cold.

So are some of the cardinals.

 

[NoJo]

So are some of the cardinals.

You'll fuck anything in a robe.

 

[Samandiriel]

You'll fuck anything in a robe.

Not you.

 

[NoJo]

Not you.

I wear pantaloons, as God intended.

 

[Guest]

So are some of the cardinals.

This one won't be, once I've slept my way there.

 

[Samandiriel]

This one won't be, once I've slept my way there.

Sluts for Jesus.

 

[Dar~]

Why do they keep electing old people to the vatican? If they voted in a 25 year old they wouldn't need a new pope overy ten years.