I'mVan
A god in a past life
- Joined
- Sep 20, 2002
- Posts
- 2,119
Consider a picture: A happy family, smiling parents and children.
But at home, behind closed doors, we find a crying and scared woman. "You're sick," he tells her, "I don't really hit you, you're just depressed. The doctors told you you were crazy." She's heard it all before, so many times she wonders some days if it's true.
The days pass, he drinks her pay cheques and goes hunting.
"Son," says she, "You can't pee in the gutter."
"Ignore your mother," says he, "You can do what you want."
Time, she cries and he shoves her. Or perhaps it's the other way around. She can't even tell the difference between him bludgeoning her sanity and her body anymore.
Retreat.
But not really, you can't run away, he'll kill you. A fantasy world then the internet. But the internet is full of real people, and diverse sites. Find an interest and people who share it. Acceptance, and more. Desire, trust, friendship. You share things with like minded people, things that you might never share with your RL circle, but that's cool. It's fantasy, and it's anonymous. Right?
Lover comes and goes, feelings of pain and betrayal on both sides. Bitterness to add to the metallic tang of the blood in her mouth.
Move out, call the police. Where did the courage come from? But you'll be safe, the law is on your side. It's a shame he has no respect for the law, and is so manipulative and persuasive. And scary. Move home. Cry.
They say timing is everything, and just when she is finding the strength in friendships to try and break free again, a new light comes. A man who treats her with respect and friendship, who shares her dreams and hopes. And desires. Such a friendship.
She makes a break, runs, far, back to the place she grew up. Where the new friend is from. He provides a haven for her and her children as she tries to rebuild a safer life.
Then it starts. Her husband has broken the laws protecting her from his interference, when it all comes down to it, that's the only reason she had to run. But he wont let go. He searches and delves, coerces and connives day and night. Twisting and manipulating everyone until he is able to find a morsel of information to drive him on.
The friends phone number.
Within a week of flight from his control and abuse, the calls start. Day and night, night and day. The friend knew she was scared, but hadn't understood just what it really meant.
Day after day, night after night, demanding contact with children and wife. Regaling the friend with tales of insanity and debauchery. Pleading, blackmailing and insisting.
She moves on to her own home, address protect by safety devices set up for exactly these cases. Phone number unlisted. Within days, somehow, he has her number. Respite for the friend. But if he thought he was getting harassed, it's a fraction of what she now has to put up with.
He finds her on-line retreat. The things she said, the things she did. It's ammunition now. He can't abuse her body anymore, but he can still mess with her mind. Blackmail and breaching the anonymous safety that was her fantasy world. There is no safe place.
He finds her on-line retreat. The things she said, the things she did, the friends she had made. It's ammunition now. He can't abuse her body anymore, but he can still mess with her mind. He doesn't know enough to contact the online friends. He coerces an acquaintance to do it. Between the two of them, they spread lies to people they don't even know, people that she had thought would be safe from all of this. Blackmail and breaching the anonymous safety that was her fantasy world. There is no safe place.
She breaks down, it's not that she wants to deny him access to his children, but he uses them as a tool to control her. She answers one of the calls, picks up the phone, he'll be there. She should have known better. But the pressure is just so much. They love him. "I love you more than mummy does," he tells them."
"Daddy loves me more than you do," they tell her. "I love daddy more than you"
Cry.
But at home, behind closed doors, we find a crying and scared woman. "You're sick," he tells her, "I don't really hit you, you're just depressed. The doctors told you you were crazy." She's heard it all before, so many times she wonders some days if it's true.
The days pass, he drinks her pay cheques and goes hunting.
"Son," says she, "You can't pee in the gutter."
"Ignore your mother," says he, "You can do what you want."
Time, she cries and he shoves her. Or perhaps it's the other way around. She can't even tell the difference between him bludgeoning her sanity and her body anymore.
Retreat.
But not really, you can't run away, he'll kill you. A fantasy world then the internet. But the internet is full of real people, and diverse sites. Find an interest and people who share it. Acceptance, and more. Desire, trust, friendship. You share things with like minded people, things that you might never share with your RL circle, but that's cool. It's fantasy, and it's anonymous. Right?
Lover comes and goes, feelings of pain and betrayal on both sides. Bitterness to add to the metallic tang of the blood in her mouth.
Move out, call the police. Where did the courage come from? But you'll be safe, the law is on your side. It's a shame he has no respect for the law, and is so manipulative and persuasive. And scary. Move home. Cry.
They say timing is everything, and just when she is finding the strength in friendships to try and break free again, a new light comes. A man who treats her with respect and friendship, who shares her dreams and hopes. And desires. Such a friendship.
She makes a break, runs, far, back to the place she grew up. Where the new friend is from. He provides a haven for her and her children as she tries to rebuild a safer life.
Then it starts. Her husband has broken the laws protecting her from his interference, when it all comes down to it, that's the only reason she had to run. But he wont let go. He searches and delves, coerces and connives day and night. Twisting and manipulating everyone until he is able to find a morsel of information to drive him on.
The friends phone number.
Within a week of flight from his control and abuse, the calls start. Day and night, night and day. The friend knew she was scared, but hadn't understood just what it really meant.
Day after day, night after night, demanding contact with children and wife. Regaling the friend with tales of insanity and debauchery. Pleading, blackmailing and insisting.
She moves on to her own home, address protect by safety devices set up for exactly these cases. Phone number unlisted. Within days, somehow, he has her number. Respite for the friend. But if he thought he was getting harassed, it's a fraction of what she now has to put up with.
He finds her on-line retreat. The things she said, the things she did. It's ammunition now. He can't abuse her body anymore, but he can still mess with her mind. Blackmail and breaching the anonymous safety that was her fantasy world. There is no safe place.
He finds her on-line retreat. The things she said, the things she did, the friends she had made. It's ammunition now. He can't abuse her body anymore, but he can still mess with her mind. He doesn't know enough to contact the online friends. He coerces an acquaintance to do it. Between the two of them, they spread lies to people they don't even know, people that she had thought would be safe from all of this. Blackmail and breaching the anonymous safety that was her fantasy world. There is no safe place.
She breaks down, it's not that she wants to deny him access to his children, but he uses them as a tool to control her. She answers one of the calls, picks up the phone, he'll be there. She should have known better. But the pressure is just so much. They love him. "I love you more than mummy does," he tells them."
"Daddy loves me more than you do," they tell her. "I love daddy more than you"
Cry.
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Thank you. I know I'm doing the right thing, deep down, but it's still very hard. I just have to keep reminding myself that my kids deserve better.
