A practice session

https://poeticoutlaws.substack.com/...e&r=5pvln&triedRedirect=true&utm_medium=email


O, We Are The Outcasts​

By: Charles Bukowski​



Jun 13, 2025

ah, christ, what a CREW:
more
poetry, always more
P O E T R Y .

if it doesn't come, coax it out with a
laxative. get your name in LIGHTS,
get it up there in
8 1/2 x 11 mimeo.

keep it coming like a miracle.

ah christ, writers are the most sickening
of all the louts!
yellow-toothed, slump-shouldered,
gutless, flea-bitten and
obvious . . . in tinker-toy rooms
with their flabby hearts
they tell us
what's wrong with the world-
as if we didn't know that a cop's club
can crack the head
and that war is a dirtier game than
marriage . . .
or down in a basement bar
hiding from a wife who doesn't appreciate him
and children he doesn't
want
he tells us that his heart is drowning in
vomit. hell, all our hearts are drowning in vomit,
in pork salt, in bad verse, in soggy
love.
but he thinks he's alone and
he thinks he's special and he thinks he's Rimbaud
and he thinks he's
Pound.

and death! how about death? did you know
that we all have to die? even Keats died, even
Milton!
and D. Thomas-THEY KILLED HIM, of course.
Thomas didn't want all those free drinks
all that free pussy-
they . . . FORCED IT ON HIM
when they should have left him alone so he could
write write WRITE!

poets.

and there's another
type. I've met them at their country
places (don't ask me what I was doing there because
I don't know).

they were born with money and
they don't have to dirty their hands in
slaughterhouses or washing
dishes in grease joints or
driving cabs or pimping or selling pot.

this gives them time to understand
Life.

they walk in with their cocktail glass
held about heart high
and when they drink they just
sip.

you are drinking green beer which you
brought with you
because you have found out through the years
that rich bastards are tight-
they use 5 cent stamps instead of airmail
they promise to have all sorts of goodies ready
upon your arrival
from gallons of whisky to
50 cent cigars. but it's never
there.
and they HIDE their women from you-
their wives, x-wives, daughters, maids, so forth,
because they've read your poems and
figure all you want to do is fuck everybody and
everything. which once might have been
true but is no longer quite
true.

and-
he WRITES TOO.
POETRY, of
course. everybody
writes
poetry.

he has plenty of time and a
postoffice box in town
and he drives there 3 or 4 times a day
looking and hoping for accepted
poems.

he thinks that poverty is a weakness of the
soul.

he thinks your mind is ill because you are
drunk all the time and have to work in a
factory 10 or 12 hours a
night.

he brings his wife in, a beauty, stolen from a
poorer rich
man.
he lets you gaze for 30 seconds
then hustles her
out. she has been crying for some
reason.

you've got 3 or 4 days to linger in the
guesthouse he says,
"come on over to dinner
sometime."
but he doesn't say when or
where. and then you find out that you are not even
IN HIS HOUSE.

you are in
ONE of his houses but
his house is somewhere
else-
you don't know
where.

he even has x-wives in some of his
houses.

his main concern is to keep his x-wives away from
you. he doesn't want to give up a
damn thing. and you can't blame him:
his x-wives are all young, stolen, kept,
talented, well-dressed, schooled, with
varying French-German accents.

and!: they
WRITE POETRY TOO. or
PAINT. or
fuck.

but his big problem is to get down to that mail
box in town to get back his
rejected poems
and to keep his eye on all the other mail boxes
in all his other
houses.

meanwhile, the starving Indians
sell beads and baskets in the streets of the small desert
town.

the Indians are not allowed in his houses
not so much because they are a fuck-threat
but because they are
dirty and
ignorant. dirty? I look down at my shirt
with the beerstain on the front.
ignorant? I light a 6 cent cigar and
forget about
it.

he or they or somebody was supposed to meet me at
the
train station.

of course, they weren't
there. "We'll be there to meet the great
Poet!"

well, I looked around and didn't see any
great poet. besides it was 7 a.m. and
40 degrees. those things
happen. the trouble was there were no
bars open. nothing open. not even a
jail.

he's a poet.
he's also a doctor, a head-shrinker.
no blood involved that
way. he won't tell me whether I am crazy or
not-I don't have the
money.

he walks out with his cocktail glass
disappears for 2 hours, 3 hours,
then suddenly comes walking back in
unannounced
with the same cocktail glass
to make sure I haven't gotten hold of
something more precious than
Life itself.

my cheap green beer is killing
me. he shows heart (hurrah) and
gives me a little pill that stops my
gagging.
but nothing decent to
drink.

he'd bought a small 6 pack
for my arrival but that was gone in an
hour and 15
minutes.

"I'll buy you barrels of beer," he had
said.

I used his phone (one of his phones)
to get deliveries of beer and
cheap whisky. the town was ten miles away,
downhill. I peeled my poor dollars from my poor
roll. and the boy needed a tip, of
course.

the way it was shaping up I could see that I was
hardly Dylan Thomas yet, not even
Robert Creeley. certainly Creeley wouldn't have
had beerstains on his
shirt.

anyhow, when I finally got hold of one of his
x-wives I was too drunk to
make it.

scared too. sure, I imagined him peering
through the window-
he didn't want to give up a damn thing-
and
leveling the luger while I was
working
while "The March to the Gallows" was playing over
the Muzak
and shooting me in the ass first and
my poor brain
later.

"an intruder," I could hear him telling them,
"ravishing one of my helpless x-wives."

I see him published in some of the magazines
now. not very good stuff.

a poem about me
too: the Polack.

the Polack whines too much. the Polack whines about his
country, other countries, all countries, the Polack
works overtime in a factory like a fool, among other
fools with "pre-drained spirits."
the Polack drinks seas of green beer
full of acid. the Polack has an ulcerated
hemorrhoid. the Polack picks on fags
"fragile fags." the Polack hates his
wife, hates his daughter. his daughter will become
an alcoholic, a prostitute. the Polack has an
"obese burned out wife." the Polack has a
spastic gut. the Polack has a
"rectal brain."

thank you, Doctor (and poet). any charge for
this? I know I still owe you for the
pill.

Your poem is not too good
but at least I got your starch up.
most of your stuff is about as lively as a
wet and deflated
beachball. but it is your round, you've won a round.
going to invite me out this
Summer? I might scrape up
trainfare. got an Indian friend who'd like to meet
you and yours. he swears he's got the biggest
pecker in the state of California.

and guess what?
he writes
POETRY
too!
 
Calypso at the Gate



Danish warmblood. Blood bay.
So what? You’re a fucking horse!!!
Seventeen hands thereabout,
so you’re kinda big,
Medium brown,
A couple of white feet, back feet,
A star and a stripe on your long nose bridge,
Nicely shaped head.
But they took your nuts, gelding.
I’ll bet that they didn’t even ask,
And that they didn’t give you anything back, either.
They left you your soul,
And it’s an awfully pretty one, too.
Big eyes, observant, gentle.
Oh, they could be a touch crazed.
They’d open wider and show me the white
Around your big ol’ iris.
“Just who do you think you are, human?
You little shit! Sawed-off human!!!
You’re not my mommy,
You’re not the boss of me!
And you don’t get to
tell me what to do.”
And you would stretch your neck out and lift that
Magnificent big old head
And then look down that very long
Very regal, magnificent nose.


There was that time I had to open
The Large Gate
To get my car out of the yard.
You decided that you - Royal You -
That nothing would be finer than eating grass from the yard.
Maybe the dog poop there
Gives it a spicy tingle.
“Get in their faces,”
She said.
“Get large,” she said.
So I opened the gate and here you came
All 1300 pounds of you.
Leading, as always.
You had that position sewed down.
So I got in your face.
I got large. You stopped, and raised your head.
I was looking at your right eye,
And it got Very Large
As you looked
Way
Down
at
Me.
And you stopped for what seemed like forever.
It was a long second at most.
And then you moved.
You feinted left,
So the human went right
And then he went to school.
You see - you knew.
Horses are Very Big
And they have Long Legs.
Four Of Them.
You moved right
And the human moved left
And was greeted by air.
I had gone two steps and you
Had gone 12 feet.
Clippity clop, off right tackle,
Followed by your merry band of
Equine Assholes.
I called the lot of you
Every sort of Motherfuckers
That I could think of.
You weren’t even listening.
You got what you wanted.
Lawn Grass.
You were corralled and safe
As I got out the car
And shut the gate behind us.
Swishing tail,
Flicking ears,
A snort,
The sounds of tearing grass.
Two Legged Control Freak.
We showed him.


Christmas. There was Christmas that year
And you overate some hay
And it stuck in your throat.
For those who don’t know,
Large Pasture Poodles
Don’t make much saliva
and they have mile long esophaguses.
Esophagi??? Hmmm, maybe.
For a cat, it would be a hairball.
For you, it was a hayball.
You can’t swallow it
And you can’t cough it out.
Your snack is trying to kill you.
Good thing the vet makes barn calls.
You looked really pitiful
And maybe a fair bit afraid, too.
Yeah, I was annoying to you,
But I stayed to help you
The only way I could.
I stayed with you,
A hand on your rump
While they worked on the other end.
A sedative, cinching your muzzle,
A vinyl hose down a nostril,
Listening carefully so as
To push the mass to your stomach
And not into a lung.
It wasn’t their first rodeo.
Yours, either, it turned out.
They got it,
And you were stoned until dawn.
Standing and staring.


And something changed between us.

You look up as I wander into the field.
You see me come into the barn.
Oh, not always, as I’m only as important
As my mind makes up to itself that I am.
You guys could be in pasture
And I’m in the barn staring at something that
Will become a project.
Out of my left periphery
It gets Very Brown
As your head takes its place there.
“Hi, human, whatcha doin’?”
How do you do that?
I find people behind me,
Size, direction and distance.
A predator/prey thing, maybe?
I heard nothing, felt nothing,
But there you were.
Good! You’re kind,
And you’re welcome.

Then I was back and forth working.
Sometimes at your place,
And often, I wasn’t.
I came to visit once
And had projects in the hay house/car barn.
You’d stand outside the door
Sometimes, patiently.
“Hey, human. Whatcha doin’?”
After I left once.
The landlady was out doing something.
The door was open, so you went in.
She saw you backing out.
Looking for the human,
She reckoned.
You were welcome,
But you really didn’t fit.

Horse politics.
Two taller horses,
And two shorter horses.
It was heighticism

You got old.
Hell, you were old before.
Swelling joints,
Balance not 100%.
No pain, but a bit of
Discomfort,
And maybe Uncertainty.
I got to see you.
We went for a walk,
You in your halter
And me, kind of in charge.
We went to see a treeline,
The landlady, you and me.
We talked about pruning
while you sampled the leaves.
It was all new for you there
And you made the most of it,
A fitting lesson for
Sentient Life.
We found clover
While walking back,
And you love/d clover.
I stayed with you while you
Ate all of it.
We crossed the street
And I knew where more was,
So we went
And you ate all of that, too.
I don’t always get to spend
As much time with Wonderful Souls,
So I took every moment
We had.
 
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