A New Direction

[Calamity Jane]

I've been doin a lot of thinking about me lately, and all those things I was supposed to do with my life that I've never managed to do... there's always been a 'really good' reason not to do things just because I want to, ya know?

So, I think at the advanced age of 28, it's time to be a little selfish.

I'm going to quit my job
Take the kids out of daycare and spend time with them
Write whatever I want, whenever the urge strikes me to do it
Enroll in school in the fall
Figure out exactly where I want my marriage to go, if I want it to go at all

And I'm scared to death, but I think it's time.

 

[Wiggles]

Well, good luck, and you go girl...

I hope everything turns out peachy-keen for you.

And that's not selfish, nobody's going to do it for you, so you might as well do it for yourself.

 

[MissTaken]

Rock on, PCG!

I envy your spirit and your determination!

Good Luck and do what you need to do for yourself. No one else will do it for you!

 

[Savage Kitten]

Time is of the essence, darling

If you can afford it finacially then I say, go for it!

Time goes so quickly when you don't even realize it. Your babies will be grown and you'll ask yourself "where did the time go?"

I don't think you are being selfish at all. Being a full time mother and wife requires a lot. In the process you will also grow and become stronger.

If this is where your heart and mind are leading you, I don't think you can deny the direction your life is suppose to go in.....

best of wishes sweety
*hugz*
Sk~

 

[Guest]

Do it! Do it!
I think you're strong and quite capable of doing anything you want in life. The ideals/goals you listed sound like fulfillment to me.
Scared is good. Take the steps needed.
And enjoy the ride!

Good luck and bright blessings!

 

[JaymesBlond007]

Balls....

...HUGE fuckin' balls. But if you got 'em you might as well let 'em swing, ya know?

Good luck and have a blast. Give your boss the finger for me.

 

[bluemuse]

I applaude your courage and strong sense of self worth, pagancowgirl. You can't make anyone else happy until you are.
I wish someone had told me that years ago....

bluemuse

 

[Ree]

You can't make anyone else happy until you are.
I wish someone had told me that years ago....

bluemuse

But would you have listened??? I think we hear these wonderful words of advice but until our hearts and minds are open to the possibilites that other people might know what they are talking about we don't hear them. I am sure that someone told me that I couldn't change my spouse or make him the man I thought he was but I didn't listen. I have to love the man he is not the man that I want him to be. I have to love myself for who I am and not the woman I used to be or the one I dreamt I could be. There is still time for the woman I wanted to be to come along but the woman I was is gone and there are things about her that we should all be grateful disappeared. I am so glad that Pagan is able to see what she wants and has the courage to follow through with that plan. I applaud her for the wisdom to figure it out now while she and her children are young and can enjoy their time together. Kudos to you Pagan!!! Best of luck and give 'em hell. You and your family deserves to be happy and only you all know how to do it.

 

[snneze]

Kindred Spirits

I did that very thing at that exact same age. I am 30 now. Two years ago I quit a very lucrative job with the federal government and went back to school. I have been going ever since. I am at the top of my class. I have a 3.9 GPA. The only reason I have done that well is because I was determined to make my life as enjoyable as I could make it. My husband and I were having a lot of difficulties at the time and I was very afraid that our marraige would not withstand my independence. But not only did it survive, it is better, stronger. He respects the new person I have become. I am a completely different person than I was two years ago. I am happier than I have ever been, because I am finally living my life for me. Everyone in my life has benefitted from my changes. I do not know you Pagan but I can truly say that I am very proud of your decisions. This is your life and you do not get to hit the rewind button and start it over if you do not follow your heart the first time around. We get one shot at this time and we have to make the most of it. Congratulations and I hope your experience is as rewarding as mine has been. It was tough for a while but it is so worth the trouble. Lisa

 

[Rubyfruit]

God, how I love a kick-ass woman like you, PCG. You must feel exhilarated and alive right now.

I see a road trip for you and the kids this summer before classes begin. Out west possibly?

 

[Starfish]

It's scary to start out, but you are going to be much happier.

Not only are you doing what you want to do, but you are doing what is right for you.

If you need any guidance or advice about school, there are many students here at lit who will be glad to help.

 

[Guest]

 

[Calamity Jane]

Thanks so much to all of you! I posted, not really expecting replies, but because writing things makes them real to me in some small way. The support is so appreciated, you can't know.

I have an appointment with my boss at 9am. Cross your fingers that I still have the courage tomorrow that I have tonight!

Ruby... roadtrip? That's how many hours in the car with a 2 year old and a 5 year old??? Gods help me, but it sounds like fun!

 

[JazzManJim]

Rock on, PCG!! I have every confidence in the world in you. You'll kick all the ass you need, and take names along the way.

And if you ever need a semi-sane place to land, come find me.

 

[latinocutie19]

Yup...!

PCG-
Yeah, i know what you mean....I just transfered to a local school from a private school(uhhh..grades!), and my focus right now is my Asc. Paralegal degree at the young age of 19. Everyone keeps asking me why i dont JUST work and then go back to my other school in the fall(under 1 semester suspension), and I keep telling them...."I'm going to get what i want from life no matter how, or from where...and nothing is going to stop me." And DAMM, it feels good to just take a chance once in a while...you never know until you try!!!!

This one's for you hun(fuckin' go for it...all out!):
"I dont have time to waste, I have time to succeed"
;-)

 

[Lasz]

Well, here is to you just doing thoese things and not just saying you are going to do thoese things.

Just dont be one of thoese people who say they are going to do something and dont do it.

YOu better do it, if not you are going to dissapoint yourself and I, go for it!

Laz

(there is no point in setting goals, if you are not going to try to achieve them).

 

[latinocutie19]

P.S PCG...!

Oh, and sweetie.. "Blessed Be"
MM ;-)

 

[latinocutie19]

Lazarus...

LOL!!!! great timing bro...my pagan name is Lazarus!
Oh, and for the AV:
"My advice to you right now, is to start drinking heavily!"(or something like that!)
;-)

 

[Rubyfruit]

Ruby... roadtrip? That's how many hours in the car with a 2 year old and a 5 year old??? Gods help me, but it sounds like fun!

It'd be an adventure! Look, you already have Jim offering a place to stay along the way. I bet we could set you up with housing the whole way out, so that you wouldn't need to pay for one hotel room.

 

[Calamity Jane]

It'd be an adventure! Look, you already have Jim offering a place to stay along the way. I bet we could set you up with housing the whole way out, so that you wouldn't need to pay for one hotel room.

Yeah, you find people willing to put up with me and my kids for even one DAY, let alone a whole night, and we'll talk.

But hey, it'll be summer, I can camp my way out there!

Call me stupid, but I thought the Music Man was East of me?

I'm so geographically challenged

 

[Rubyfruit]

Oh, he might be. Well, scratch the jazz man then. I'm sure we could put you up across country though. Ok, cym did turn down a visit from me and my 2 year old twins, but she's practically next door anyway, so you don't need her.

 

[Cath!]

I wish you luck...I waited til I was 38 til I changed my life direction. It is scary but things work out in the long run.

 

[sch00lteacher]

Do it.

 

[Calamity Jane]

Well, the meeting with my boss got postponed. She's going to call me when she has time to talk to me. It's giving me time to think, and I'm not sure that's a good thing...

 

[Guest]

Well, the meeting with my boss got postponed. She's going to call me when she has time to talk to me. It's giving me time to think, and I'm not sure that's a good thing...

Don't second guess your voice, you know, that one that speaks softly, within in the core of you.
Trust your gut. Don't overanalyze. You're going to be fine!