Not too Old, but Too Honest...

I was raised to never hit women, I was raised to be honest, I was raised that if you go to work for eight hours, you do your job, that is why you are there, your boss is paying you.

I tell the truth.

I love women.

I was raised to be courteous to others, I cannont stand the callousness of the internet. People are exceptionally rude to others over the internet, and excuse me but it sure seems to me that the younger you are the more likely you are to be rude. The anonimity of the internet just seems to cause people to chuck courtesy right out the window.


I went out on a date once, I asked the girl "Do you want to go to dinner? A movie? what do you want to do?"

She said "I don't know whatever you want to do."

I said "I'm a 21 year old male, I find you attractive, what do you think I want to do?"

She looked at me slightly shocked "And what do you want to do?"

"Take you to a hotel, get you out of your clothes and fuck you."

She didn't even want to go to dinner after that. Why do women think men take them out on dates. I mean I like eating (I love food, and I like movies, but I can do both those things by myself.)

My wife filed for divorce, I really believe it's because she got all my money, I'm completely broke. For the last two years of our marriage I had given up all hope of ever doing anything I wanted to do, or accomplish any of my lifes goals.

I just turned 40 and I'm about 40 lbs overweight.

I want to meet a slightly submissive woman who likes to perform oral sex through to completion.

*******************************************
I feel like the born loser often. I'll tell you why in the worst crisis situations I'm absolutely calm. Because I expect the worst to happen, it always does. It's hard to be shocked, scared, get all panicky about things when you saw it comming. I'm just so used to everything I thought bad was gonna happen to me, actually happening, that I don't get perturbed when it finally happens.

*******************************************88

I really feel like that fact that I'm honest and hardworking has held me back. I used to be a bit of a "Bad boy" and I'll tell you it was a lot more fun, I got laid!

Being a responsible individual hasn't reaped the rewards they always told me being honest and hardworking, loyal, faithful, etc.. reaped.

Women don't seem to be attracted and want to have wild sex with honest hardworking, loyal, faithful men.

Other men take credit for your work, they walk on you, use you as a rung in the ladder on the way to their goals.

********************************************

What is wrong with the world, why are good guys/girls shat upon, and the cocksuckers who blow smoke up the bosses ass promoted. Why can't a good guy get laid?

Why has society taken what we told ourselves was the goal, the way you should live your life, and made it regretable if you live your life that way.

***************************
I'm very smart, I can learn anything, I think I could do brain surgery or be a rocket scientist. Had I not changed my goals to do the right thing for my family, there is no telling what I could be now. Twelve years of my life were wasted the day my wife filed for divorce, I'll take nothing from our relationship.

Why did I try, what is the reason I should try again, why should anyone try again.

Why be honest, people don't want to hear the truth, and people will take advantage of you. Why work hard, take credit for someone else's work, your boss probably won't know any better.

Why be polite to people, they won't be polite in return?

*********************************************

Is the world that bad now? That's the way I see it, maybe I'm just angry, but I'll tell you, it really seems that I was naieve to do what I thought was the right thing, there is no reward.

To bad that I don't know your location. If you were close enough I might be tempted to ask you to meet me for coffee and we could discuss this rant in person.

But anyway, here goes. I don't know about other women, but I am not a big "Bad Boy" fan myself. I prefer more stable men. I look at it this way. I don't have to lower my standards or my manners just because other people do. Believe me when I say this is not a gender thing, it is pretty much across the board.

I was raised to be honest, and mannerly and I am not giving those up for anyone.

As to the whole "Why go on?" thing. As long as I draw breath, there is hope.

Bad_Bad_LB said:

I was raised to never hit women, I was raised to be honest, I was raised that if you go to work for eight hours, you do your job, that is why you are there, your boss is paying you.

I tell the truth.

I love women.

I was raised to be courteous to others, I cannont stand the callousness of the internet. People are exceptionally rude to others over the internet, and excuse me but it sure seems to me that the younger you are the more likely you are to be rude. The anonimity of the internet just seems to cause people to chuck courtesy right out the window.


I went out on a date once, I asked the girl "Do you want to go to dinner? A movie? what do you want to do?"

She said "I don't know whatever you want to do."

I said "I'm a 21 year old male, I find you attractive, what do you think I want to do?"

She looked at me slightly shocked "And what do you want to do?"

"Take you to a hotel, get you out of your clothes and fuck you."

She didn't even want to go to dinner after that. Why do women think men take them out on dates. I mean I like eating (I love food, and I like movies, but I can do both those things by myself.)

My wife filed for divorce, I really believe it's because she got all my money, I'm completely broke. For the last two years of our marriage I had given up all hope of ever doing anything I wanted to do, or accomplish any of my lifes goals.

I just turned 40 and I'm about 40 lbs overweight.

I want to meet a slightly submissive woman who likes to perform oral sex through to completion.

*******************************************
I feel like the born loser often. I'll tell you why in the worst crisis situations I'm absolutely calm. Because I expect the worst to happen, it always does. It's hard to be shocked, scared, get all panicky about things when you saw it comming. I'm just so used to everything I thought bad was gonna happen to me, actually happening, that I don't get perturbed when it finally happens.

*******************************************88

I really feel like that fact that I'm honest and hardworking has held me back. I used to be a bit of a "Bad boy" and I'll tell you it was a lot more fun, I got laid!

Being a responsible individual hasn't reaped the rewards they always told me being honest and hardworking, loyal, faithful, etc.. reaped.

Women don't seem to be attracted and want to have wild sex with honest hardworking, loyal, faithful men.

Other men take credit for your work, they walk on you, use you as a rung in the ladder on the way to their goals.

********************************************

What is wrong with the world, why are good guys/girls shat upon, and the cocksuckers who blow smoke up the bosses ass promoted. Why can't a good guy get laid?

Why has society taken what we told ourselves was the goal, the way you should live your life, and made it regretable if you live your life that way.

***************************
I'm very smart, I can learn anything, I think I could do brain surgery or be a rocket scientist. Had I not changed my goals to do the right thing for my family, there is no telling what I could be now. Twelve years of my life were wasted the day my wife filed for divorce, I'll take nothing from our relationship.

Why did I try, what is the reason I should try again, why should anyone try again.

Why be honest, people don't want to hear the truth, and people will take advantage of you. Why work hard, take credit for someone else's work, your boss probably won't know any better.

Why be polite to people, they won't be polite in return?

*********************************************

Is the world that bad now? That's the way I see it, maybe I'm just angry, but I'll tell you, it really seems that I was naieve to do what I thought was the right thing, there is no reward.

Click to expand...

You said quite a bit. I'm sure that many people here have felt the same way about some of your points at one time or another. I know I have.

I don't think the world is simply bad. I do think that there are now and have always been bad people. I've seen them get undo promotions, step all over others and still rise. I've also seen some of them hit rock bottom.

Don't give up on people. Like you, there are polite kind people around. Some have put up walls to prevent further hurt. These walls are thick and tall, but they can be broken down.

Okay, enough of my seriousness for this century. If certain people read this, they will think I've gone sane.

Missingmeds said:

To bad that I don't know your location. If you were close enough I might be tempted to ask you to meet me for coffee and we could discuss this rant in person.

But anyway, here goes. I don't know about other women, but I am not a big "Bad Boy" fan myself. I prefer more stable men. I look at it this way. I don't have to lower my standards or my manners just because other people do. Believe me when I say this is not a gender thing, it is pretty much across the board.

I was raised to be honest, and mannerly and I am not giving those up for anyone.

As to the whole "Why go on?" thing. As long as I draw breath, there is hope.

Click to expand...

You know Missing, I agree with you. I've always been a sucker for the nice quiet nerd, but the bad boys always ran after me. Let's hope he finds what he wants here. Hope! Love! A BJ!!!

*smacks done with heel of hand on head*

Okay you are cured of being sane.....

On the born loser subject, I can offer reams of evidence of how "Whatever can go wrong will."

Here's a fun example.

As I mentioned, I'm broke, the last three years I worked I raked in about $230,000.00 and am wondering where it went. I cashed in two 401Ks (about $35,000) to survive on and pay off all my wife's and my debts and to live upon while I sought new employment.

So when my wife filed for divorce my Father hired a lawyer for me, the best in town.

So I thought to myself, no way am I going to go through a divorce and have the best lawyer on my side, what's gonna happen?

My lawyer is now a Federal Judge, I don't know who my new lawyer is, and I have a court date tomorrow.

Boy oh boy, you sure do have the blues mister.

All I can tell you is that ending a marriage is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. Don't expect it to be easy, cos it ain't.

BUT.... once you're thru it and have taken some time to heal, you'll be surprised at just how good life is.

Geez, I've got 10yrs on you (and the same initials.. LB) and I've done it. I've come out the other side of all the crap and I'm loving life.

Secret is to remain positive. Turn your thinking around to look for the good, and not the bad. Look forward to your 'new' life and don't dwell on your 'old' one. A happy disposition and bright and cheerful smile will draw people to you... and they will be your lifeline.

Keep smiling babe... life is good, enjoy it.

LadyBird is right. You have to look at the upside of things and you have to be positive. I have been thru a divorce and while I agree that they are not fun, I also know that you will survive.

Well ....I have been divorced so many times (4) that I lost count and also was attracted to the 'bad'-boy types if ya will ...

people online can be and will be Cruel as hell cause they THINK they can get by with it.( and if they are Asses ONLINE MOST likely they are Offline as well)..sorry about your wife and all ..took me awhile to become a 'good one'myself...I try to ignore all the asswipes and losers on the net cause there are just as many of us who are sweet ,intelligent ,loving and caring people,Both online and off and we far outweigh the Idiots on here ,believe me..

I met a wonderful man online almost 2 years ago right here at Lit. so it can happen cause we are still together, and loving and living each day 1 at a time..You Do have to concentrate on the positive more ,I agree...dont let setbacks get ya down ,I for one think they are meant to make us stronger people....

Good Luck and may your destiny find you..

Ladybird said:

Boy oh boy, you sure do have the blues mister.

All I can tell you is that ending a marriage is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. Don't expect it to be easy, cos it ain't.

BUT.... once you're thru it and have taken some time to heal, you'll be surprised at just how good life is.

Geez, I've got 10yrs on you (and the same initials.. LB) and I've done it. I've come out the other side of all the crap and I'm loving life.

Secret is to remain positive. Turn your thinking around to look for the good, and not the bad. Look forward to your 'new' life and don't dwell on your 'old' one. A happy disposition and bright and cheerful smile will draw people to you... and they will be your lifeline.

Keep smiling babe... life is good, enjoy it.

Click to expand...

LB love your new av! Gorgeous! (((((((((Ladybird)))))))))))

As the others have stated. I am so sorry for your marriage breaking up. I have been there 22 1/2 yrs ago. I was very young. Married at 19 and divorced at 22. It took me a long time to ever trust a man enough to start to date again. And the least little thing would send me running the other directions. I fell in love and got walked over for it. I built up some really strong walls. But after awhile it is easier and you start to realize that you are letting life pass you by not participating. It is scary. And there are good, sweet ppl out there. When I was younger I wanted the "bad boy" type because I had been raised, just like you, be honest, work hard, treat ppl good, etc.. and I wanted to see what it was like on the other side. Well all it got me was heartache and the realization that what I really want is a loving, caring man that has a job, is stable, who is not afraid to treat a woman the way she deserves to be treated. To help me with the chores, paying bills, etc...There are plenty of women who are looking for a good, hard working man. It just might take time. There are several ppl here who went through divorces that they did not want, but after healing have found their soulmates right here. I think I have found mine here. But I think it took going through all of that for so many years to get me to the point that I was ready to accept someone to love me and for me to love them. Do try to start to think positively once you heal from the divorce, it does work. I used to be the same as you. Open your heart to ppl. You might get hurt, but then when that right one comes along you will be ready and able to accept it and have a very happy life. I wish you nothing but the best. Welcome to Lit and the Playground and I hope that we can be friends. As far as ppl being rude. Yes, you will find that and it makes me sick. Yes it is cyber, but like so many ppl have stated before, on the other side of that computer is a human being. Someone who has feelings, who hurts, who deserves to be treated with respect.
Hope that some of these comments will help you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and hope that you find what you are looking for and that you do not have to suffer too much along the way.

Toni ,that was beautiful and heartfelt and I am proud to call you a friend..

I have to agree with these other ladies here, if you dwell on the negative then the negative is what you will see. If you dwell on the positive then that is what you will see.

I am going through a divorce at this time and yes it is tough, it sucks! But I know it is the right thing to do and I will be much happier and better off when it is over.

OMG, you cant let the assholes online upset you, there are so many wonderful people online also,,,,,,,, you need to just keep looking because I have met quite a few of the great ones,,,, some are on lit and some on chat,,,,,,, but the main thing is to not let the negative rule your life, live for the positive and the positive is what you will find!

Good luck and keep your head up!

Bad_Bad_LB said:

I was raised to never hit women, I was raised to be honest, I was raised that if you go to work for eight hours, you do your job, that is why you are there, your boss is paying you.

I tell the truth.

I love women.

I was raised to be courteous to others, I cannont stand the callousness of the internet. People are exceptionally rude to others over the internet, and excuse me but it sure seems to me that the younger you are the more likely you are to be rude. The anonimity of the internet just seems to cause people to chuck courtesy right out the window.


I went out on a date once, I asked the girl "Do you want to go to dinner? A movie? what do you want to do?"

She said "I don't know whatever you want to do."

I said "I'm a 21 year old male, I find you attractive, what do you think I want to do?"

She looked at me slightly shocked "And what do you want to do?"

"Take you to a hotel, get you out of your clothes and fuck you."

She didn't even want to go to dinner after that. Why do women think men take them out on dates. I mean I like eating (I love food, and I like movies, but I can do both those things by myself.)

My wife filed for divorce, I really believe it's because she got all my money, I'm completely broke. For the last two years of our marriage I had given up all hope of ever doing anything I wanted to do, or accomplish any of my lifes goals.

I just turned 40 and I'm about 40 lbs overweight.

I want to meet a slightly submissive woman who likes to perform oral sex through to completion.

*******************************************
I feel like the born loser often. I'll tell you why in the worst crisis situations I'm absolutely calm. Because I expect the worst to happen, it always does. It's hard to be shocked, scared, get all panicky about things when you saw it comming. I'm just so used to everything I thought bad was gonna happen to me, actually happening, that I don't get perturbed when it finally happens.

*******************************************88

I really feel like that fact that I'm honest and hardworking has held me back. I used to be a bit of a "Bad boy" and I'll tell you it was a lot more fun, I got laid!

Being a responsible individual hasn't reaped the rewards they always told me being honest and hardworking, loyal, faithful, etc.. reaped.

Women don't seem to be attracted and want to have wild sex with honest hardworking, loyal, faithful men.

Other men take credit for your work, they walk on you, use you as a rung in the ladder on the way to their goals.

********************************************

What is wrong with the world, why are good guys/girls shat upon, and the cocksuckers who blow smoke up the bosses ass promoted. Why can't a good guy get laid?

Why has society taken what we told ourselves was the goal, the way you should live your life, and made it regretable if you live your life that way.

***************************
I'm very smart, I can learn anything, I think I could do brain surgery or be a rocket scientist. Had I not changed my goals to do the right thing for my family, there is no telling what I could be now. Twelve years of my life were wasted the day my wife filed for divorce, I'll take nothing from our relationship.

Why did I try, what is the reason I should try again, why should anyone try again.

Why be honest, people don't want to hear the truth, and people will take advantage of you. Why work hard, take credit for someone else's work, your boss probably won't know any better.

Why be polite to people, they won't be polite in return?

*********************************************

Is the world that bad now? That's the way I see it, maybe I'm just angry, but I'll tell you, it really seems that I was naieve to do what I thought was the right thing, there is no reward.

Click to expand...

You said a lot..I’ll only touch on a few things.

Why do I go on dates? (Being a woman … or a PERSON) I don’t go on dates to get out of the house, to see a free movie or to get free food..I go to spend time with the person, I enjoy many things about dating, conversation and flirting, teasing, the playfulness and the closeness is all a big part of it for me …I want more then just a Room for the night …I like walking around holding hands and talking and laughing, making out in the theater or a parked car..Hell my best date didn’t cost more then 5 bucks in gas money, We parked on a mountain and talked and made out and had sex till 4 am …so if it was me I’m not to sure that you wouldn’t have got what you wanted if you took some time and I felt good in your presence..

I think you just fell in love with the wrong person. It happens to many of us and its never good…there is a person out there for you and someday when you are ready …(WOW) she’ll be there, just know who you are and what you want and don’t settle..
Good Luck !! : )

The real question is, are you happy with yourself ? It really doesn't amount to a hill of beans what others think. If you're happy with how you've lived your life, that is all that matters.

Yes, life is unfair. Yes, you're going to find that people who are superficial walk all over you. Things are not going to go as planned. You're going to have bad times and good times. And it really does rain on the just and unjust alike.

But, if you take the path of others, will you be able to live with yourself ? How happy will you be if you're faking who you really are ? These are questions only you can answer.

Good luck.

~Dream~ said:

Toni ,that was beautiful and heartfelt and I am proud to call you a friend..

Click to expand...

Thank you Dream. I am just being me. That is all I know how to do. If letting someone know what I went through to let them know that they are not alone and that it WILL get better than I will do that. I hate to see anyone hurting or having to go through anything like this. But sometimes it takes that for us to be the ppl that we are.

bigcpl4fun said:

The real question is, are you happy with yourself ? It really doesn't amount to a hill of beans what others think. If you're happy with how you've lived your life, that is all that matters.

Yes, life is unfair. Yes, you're going to find that people who are superficial walk all over you. Things are not going to go as planned. You're going to have bad times and good times. And it really does rain on the just and unjust alike.

But, if you take the path of others, will you be able to live with yourself ? How happy will you be if you're faking who you really are ? These are questions only you can answer.

Good luck.

Click to expand...

Your post rocked!

The only thing I would add is this: Yes, you're going to find that people who are superficial walk all over you if you let them.

Bad_Bad_LB:
So much of life is a choice. It is so easy to blame everyone around you for your shortcomings and failures and not see how you contributed to it as well. Life sucks. People suck. Everything sucks really. YOU don't have to suck. Fuck everyone else, be who you want and be comfortable with that. Just because you are honest..etc.. doesn't mean those around you have to be, or even that they should be. The focus is not on you with anyone except for you. When you start to look out wards a bit - and not with the idea of how this or that will directly effect you, but how you can directly effect this or that you may be surprised at how you can change the things you dislike about your life so that it suits you more. Envy is a waste of time. Who cares what other people have or how they got it? Care about what you have and cultivate what you want.

Reward? For what? The reward for living a good life is just that: living a good life. At the end, when you take your dying breath, do you really want to have regrets because you went outside of your natural self to be someone you thought you should be for monetary gain, popularity, etc.? No one is going to sing your praises or worship you for being a good guy - but no one would if you weren't either.

You told a girl on the first date that you wanted to fuck her? You may love women (although I suspect that you just really love sex which there is nothing wrong with - just don't confuse the two), but it doesn't seem you understand them. Again the focus shouldn't be on you, but the other person you are with. That she was shocked and ended the date implies that you didn't know her well and didn't know what she wanted. Women go on dates for a myriad of reasons - one of them being to get laid. We can eat, drink, watch movies and be merry by ourselves as well. If you just wanted to fuck and perhaps she just wanted companionship - then you had different expectations which should have been addressed before the date.

Oh, I can see my shortcommings, I don't have a problem with that.

The day I asked my wife to marry me, I asked her plans for the future, we both wanted to go to college, etc.. etc..

Well I've worked and worked and she got what she wanted and now she's discarding me.

I found it a lot eaiser to give in, rather than stand my ground, when I felt she made bad decisions, I thought, well at least she's happy, even if it makes me miserable.

The last two years I had completely given up on any thought of getting what I wanted out of the relationship, decided to soldier on, pay the bills, and simply exist.

I clean house, she doesn't at all. I cook, she only cooks when it's to impress her friends. She doesn't pay bills, yet she runs up lots of bills, that's where all my money went.

No, I'm not perfect, but neither was she, but I'm the only one who knows that. She thinks she's done everything right.

She reads those self help books, you know, no one is going to do it for you, so you have to do it yourself.

Those books don't say "But if you love someone, you may want to consider them first."

Where as I always considered my family, including my wife, what they wanted, how they felt, how my decisions would effect them, she never, not one time, considered me.


I had a job as a maintenance tech, two miles from our house, $16.00 an hour, they would pay for me to get an Associates degree in Automation Systems.

I got a letter from the IBEW to start an apprenticeship, she saw it and threatened to divorce me if I didn't take the IBEW apprenticeship.

I told her it would be a pay cut and we couldn't afford any major purchases until I got through apprenticeship.

I started the Apprenticeship July 2002, she bought a USED Volkswagen with 33,000 Miles on it for $21,000 that October. She used $3000 of the money I saved to pay taxes as a down payment on her car. My dad worked for FORD, we could have A-Planned her a new car for $17,000. We then got a $5000 tax bill.

She was pissed I didn't have the money to pay the taxes.

I could only sit quietly and recall all the times I told her "We can't get you a new car now, we have to wait until we know how much we have to pay in taxes, maybe in the spring."

I should have simply told her, "NO!" but I gave in, a failing of mine.