Sex & Shenanigans

[dawn_of_night]

Kangaroo pouch having motherfuckers

But seriously though...
Think how comforting that must be....
Like getting a warm hug from your favorite pair of breasts, like a cuddle puddle life sized kanga pocket....

 

[Bry1313]

To all the men reading this...this is where most of you go wrong. You give women what they want.

Always...and I mean always...keep them wanting more.

*In his e-baby voice* Aww, poor wittle Canadian pwincess. Doesn't always get what she wants. Here wittle pwincess, have an ice cweam cone...

Ok, this is my first attempt at typing baby talk lol. How am I doing?

I am a professional at disappointing women around here…….(hmmm, that either sounds wrong to way too right)

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

I am a professional at disappointing women around here…….(hmmm, that either sounds wrong to way too right)

I think it’s in the “man” job description sadly. The bar’s very low.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

But seriously though...
Think how comforting that must be....
Like getting a warm hug from your favorite pair of breasts, like a cuddle puddle life sized kanga pocket....

I hear it’s more mucusy IRL. But I do like a comfy sleeping bag.

 

[dawn_of_night]

I hear it’s more mucusy IRL. But I do like a comfy sleeping bag.

Ewh.
I was imagining a perfect world...
Actually, I was also thinking....
If I'd rather spend the night sleeping between two giant breast or two giant testicles... But then I felt like I was taking @crazychemgirl 's questions strategy and I didn't want to do that....

 

[crazychemgirl]

 

[Amanda330]

I am a professional at disappointing women around here…….(hmmm, that either sounds wrong to way too right)

This is a lie. You've never disappointed me.

 

[Taegul]

This is a lie. You've never disappointed me.

Please double check the thread you're posting in, this is not the Baseless Lies thread.

Thank you.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

This is a lie. You've never disappointed me.

https://media3.giphy.com/media/E4OXrJQSRVce4yFnIY/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe91ej1is3kebxulhniih3lkq43oyys1a9shnrmbxgks&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

 

[MissLabelled]

Please double check the thread you're posting in, this is not the Baseless Lies thread.

Thank you.

But counterpoint...

https://media1.giphy.com/media/A7Zc53i8U59SHv9CAm/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952iphi2k9rp0d04wx8vijpvboz9jks4xa1mjh1zt6z&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

 

[UnquietDreams]

Let's just have post Wednesday....
And none of this fake news....
Happy Thurst Day Fuckers
Also. Good morning

Good morning, love.

 

[dawn_of_night]

Good morning, love.

Good morning, Ho.
My morning took a wrong turn....
I'm not tending a blister the size of a pencil eraser ....

 

[UnquietDreams]

Today I'm just going to hang out for a little while in the afternoon. I have a morning meeting at the Starbucks next door to the game shop (I wonder who picked the place for that meeting? ). Saturday I'm DMing a D&D one-shot in the afternoon then playing a Vampire: The Masquerade one-shot in the evening. Sunday afternoon is our usual D&D campaign.

Oh, I am envious! I miss playing. I DMed the neighborhood kids' games back before I moved, for a bunch of my daughter's friends. As they were high school, and my kid wasn't interested, and I thought it might look a little weird for me to be hanging with them, so we set up tables in the driveway. Eventually, their parents would grab lawn chairs and beer and watch us play, and I got one of the moms to join. I miss that.

And I haven't heard VtM in a while! Loved that game. OWoD or New? I was partial to the mechanics of the Old.

 

[Trubbycat]

Ewh.
I was imagining a perfect world...
Actually, I was also thinking....
If I'd rather spend the night sleeping between two giant breast or two giant testicles...

Breasts are separate so you can snuggle and get cozy. Testicles are more like a giant hairy beanbag so...

Lost where I was going with this...

 

[UnquietDreams]

Would this be your fake Sunday then? And then Friday would be your fake Monday and Saturday would be your fake Tuesday?

Wait, if today is Fake Friday...or is it Fake Sunday? Or ...

 

[Trubbycat]

Today is Fake Monday. Tomorrow is Fake Tuesday/Real Friday. Then Real Saturday and we're back on track.

 

[Taegul]

But counterpoint...

https://media1.giphy.com/media/A7Zc53i8U59SHv9CAm/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952iphi2k9rp0d04wx8vijpvboz9jks4xa1mjh1zt6z&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

https://media.tenor.com/ZxT4FM0dYUkAAAAC/maury-well.gif

 

[Taegul]

https://media.tenor.com/ZxT4FM0dYUkAAAAC/maury-well.gif

And I am NOT the father.

 

[crazychemgirl]

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

I am a professional at disappointing women around here…….(hmmm, that either sounds wrong to way too right)

Professional? So I have to start paying you for it?

 

[dawn_of_night]

Today is Fake Monday. Tomorrow is Fake Tuesday/Real Friday. Then Real Saturday and we're back on track.

Nope. Nope. Nope.
No fake Monday...

 

[dawn_of_night]

View attachment 2358181

I love it! I want to snuggle

 

[dawn_of_night]

Today is Fake Monday. Tomorrow is Fake Tuesday/Real Friday. Then Real Saturday and we're back on track.

So is it okay to have real sex on fake days or should we have fake sex on real days?
Someone's gonna have to fake an orgasm too and I'm NOT volunteering for that....

Wait, if today is Fake Friday...or is it Fake Sunday? Or ...

 

[UnquietDreams]

View attachment 2358181

Carcharodon carcharias Goofballias

 

[Taegul]

View attachment 2358181

To think that tornados are filled with these monsters! That's what those Sharknado documentaries have taught me, at least.