Sex & Shenanigans

Morning weirdos.

The oddest thing just happened, was letting the dog out (shut it) and she startled two frogs fucking on the patio. I could swear one of them was dressed like George Washington. No idea what the fuck was going on.

Anyway, hope everyone’s having a sexy Thirsty Thursday!
Frogs be hoes yall ..


Also … male frogs frequently gangbang the fuck out of a female … so take that information however you want.
 
Remember what I said this morning about never loving my wife more?

This morning we went to Target together and we picked up some washcloths. Then she decided a few minutes later that she didn't like those washcloths. And I learned that my wife is the sort of person to put an item back on a shelf in a completely different department. And it has me rethinking our entire relationship.

*I did ask, and she did tell me that she doesn't do this with refrigerated perishables, but I don't know if I can believe her now.
It's true .... Those people are the worst ... However guilty as charged ... I find something I like better, I'm like a box troll, I just replace it with said item....
 
Remember what I said this morning about never loving my wife more?

This morning we went to Target together and we picked up some washcloths. Then she decided a few minutes later that she didn't like those washcloths. And I learned that my wife is the sort of person to put an item back on a shelf in a completely different department. And it has me rethinking our entire relationship.

*I did ask, and she did tell me that she doesn't do this with refrigerated perishables, but I don't know if I can believe her now.
I understand completely. If you want to get my hackles up, that’s one way to do it 🤣
 
It's true .... Those people are the worst ... However guilty as charged ... I find something I like better, I'm like a box troll, I just replace it with said item....
https://media.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExbXYwMHJ0aGE4a2Rtbm84NjF6ZnloOXVycnRpMnJzdW9ubjY4MWFkeiZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/eEz6PVDiK9dC/giphy-downsized-large.gif
🤣🤣🤣

I grew up working in grocery stores. I am morally obligated to put stuff in the right place - when I see it on the shelf! I didn't even put it there, and I have to put it back.

After years of therapy, I'm getting better and less inclined to do that.

Actually, I'm just getting lazy as I get older.
 
Remember what I said this morning about never loving my wife more?

This morning we went to Target together and we picked up some washcloths. Then she decided a few minutes later that she didn't like those washcloths. And I learned that my wife is the sort of person to put an item back on a shelf in a completely different department. And it has me rethinking our entire relationship.

*I did ask, and she did tell me that she doesn't do this with refrigerated perishables, but I don't know if I can believe her now.
She totally does and she is part of a larger evil sorority - I found frozen peas right next to a pack of women’s underwear (not cute) in the hardware department.
 
Remember what I said this morning about never loving my wife more?

This morning we went to Target together and we picked up some washcloths. Then she decided a few minutes later that she didn't like those washcloths. And I learned that my wife is the sort of person to put an item back on a shelf in a completely different department. And it has me rethinking our entire relationship.

*I did ask, and she did tell me that she doesn't do this with refrigerated perishables, but I don't know if I can believe her now.
I almost always go back to the proper aisle to return something, unless I'm annoyed. Then I'll just throw it as hard as I can.
 
Yup. I was walking through my local store once, and found a gallon of milk in the goddamn freezer. How lazy does one have to be (or oblivious, or evil) to put it there??
I’ve seen socks in freezers, hairspray, a half eaten orange. A half eaten orange!!! Like some motherfucker but into half an orange like a rabid monkey and then left it right next to a Ben n Jerry’s cherry Garcia pint. Animals!
 
I almost always go back to the proper aisle to return something, unless I'm annoyed. Then I'll just throw it as hard as I can.
But but but... shouldn't you be batting it down the aisle or something felinian like that?
 
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