🏆 Wanker of the Week Awards 🏆

[SirConradPeckereye]

Nominated for repeating MY mistake of stupidly thinking wankers could share or some bullshit.

Nominated again for repeating my mistake and excluding herself when it’s very clear that all three of them deserve it.

Triple nominated for tagging the same post TWICE and for not including himself as all four deserve it.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

Triple nominated for tagging the same post TWICE and for not including himself as all four deserve it.

https://media1.giphy.com/media/BKSpzP2p15pAs/giphy.gif?cid=2154d3d7jyy33h6fmit07yvk6tjdxjjmafciti0pm934bf06&ep=v1_gifs_related&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

 

[Wand3rlust]

Nominations close at midnight BST.

It's nearly over guys... soon... you shall look back on my tenure with fondness and love.

Until then. Come on you wankers!!!

 

[GSDom]

Nominations close at midnight BST.

It's nearly over guys... soon... you shall look back on my tenure with fondness and love.

Until then. Come on you wankers!!!

Wait…so your name is WANK3rLust? I’ve been reading it wrong so long!

 

[Wand3rlust]

Wait…so your name is WANK3rLust? I’ve been reading it wrong so long!

Nominated for being rude. And also. I'm totally not a wanker, and are adorable.

 

[Bry1313]

Nominations close at midnight BST.

It's nearly over guys... soon... you shall look back on my tenure with fondness and love.

Until then. Come on you wankers!!!

Third best judge we’ve ever had, congrats on your tenure as panel of judge

 

[GSDom]

Nominated for being rude. And also. I'm totally not a wanker, and are adorable.

True. You’re definitely adorable and quite respectable!

 

[Bry1313]

True. You’re definitely adorable and quite respectable!

Nominated for sucking up to one of the all time wankers.

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Nominating @OrdinaryPerson and @Bry1313 for basically merging into one poster

Nominated for this saying before even seeing our picture

 

[StillRain]

True. You’re definitely adorable and quite respectable!

Nominated for massive sucking up.

 

[StillRain]

Nominations close at midnight BST.

It's nearly over guys... soon... you shall look back on my tenure with fondness and love.

Until then. Come on you wankers!!!

You have indeed been an upstanding and noteworthy panel of judge. I once again congratulate myself on my excellent choices in spite of the contrary opinions of bry1313 the masses who protest so raucously.

I wonder what wonderful decision I will make next?! Who could fill such big shoes? I’m sure they will be equally as extraordinary, or maybe at least as tardy. I can’t wait to see.

We can only hope they put in half as much effort as @Bry1313 and make their own fucking certificates. Am I right @crazychemgirl?

First though, we need to find out who wand3rs last wanker is.

 

[Saltfountain]

Nominated for being so far up her own arse she equates seeing a post on a thread I follow with stalking her...

I apologise unreservedly for this post.

It was made as an attempt at humour. I genuinely didn't think it would cause offence or upset

 

[InThe312]

When do I pick up my award?? Or do I need to vanish again?

Bonus nomination for just assuming you'll waltz right in here and score the most coveted Lit award in the history of this thread.

 

[StillRain]

I apologise unreservedly for this post.

It was made as an attempt at humour. I genuinely didn't think it would cause offence or upset

Still nominated.

 

[StillRain]

Bonus nomination for just assuming you'll waltz right in here and score the most coveted Lit award in the history of this thread.

I think you mean in the history of history.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

You have indeed been an upstanding and noteworthy panel of judge. I once again congratulate myself on my excellent choices in spite of the contrary opinions of bry1313 the masses who protest so raucously.

I wonder what wonderful decision I will make next?! Who could fill such big shoes? I’m sure they will be equally as extraordinary, or maybe at least as tardy. I can’t wait to see.

We can only hope they put in half as much effort as @Bry1313 and make their own fucking certificates. Am I right @crazychemgirl?

First though, we need to find out who wand3rs last wanker is.

That’s a lot of words to not say anything . At least I’m quick to my no point. Can I still nominate?

 

[StillRain]

That’s a lot of words to not say anything . At least I’m quick to my no point. Can I still nominate?

You’re just picking up on this NOW?

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

You’re just picking up on this NOW?

I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I don’t pay a LOT of attention…to most anything.

 

[StillRain]

What’s the time in Wand3rland I wonder.

 

[Wand3rlust]

Nominations closed at midnight. Its 7.30am. I'll have it done by noon...

After that?.... you're on your own

 

[Wand3rlust]

So - the final nominations for the greatest tenure of panel of judge since the OG are in...

@Lmizzler for guest judge or wanker … cuz he’s so absent
@Wand3rlust because @crazychemgirl missese her snark adorableness in shenanigans – aw – thanks!
Plus @deft @Daisy_Love and @ShaneoD – although those lot are for snark.
@SalaciousMonkey because keeping you sluts in line ain't easy!
@OrdinaryPerson because she won't audition with @SirConradPeckereye for the Amazing Race
@Wand3rlust for summoning @Lord Pmann and not mentioning
@crazychemgirl for trying to pass that tagging a litster is different to naming a litster
@StillRain for not understanding it’s better
@Bry1313 for not speaking the language
@Photog1rl for utilisation of the word throuple
@SalaciousMonkey22 for forcing @crazychemgirl to cancel the awards and thereby upsetting @Indie
@PrettyLilPussy19 for being gone sooooooo soooooo longgggg
@Indie for suggesting @StillRain ‘s vagina is cringe worthy.
@InThe312 for abandoning @StillRain for a hookers and blow weekend with the boys
@jason28053 for the suggestion of flippant nominations
@Indie for sucking up
@Indie for unscrupulous flirting.
@StillRain for making @Indie Google unscrupulous
@Bry1313 and @SirConradPeckereye for bragging about bring able to drive 'stick' like it's some kind of fucking achievement – the whole of the UK rolls it’s eyes…
@Saltfountain for suggesting it's nothing
@Saltfountain for not understanding when a tongue is firmly planted in a cheek
@Lord Pmann for his ridiculous idea of built-in boxers pants, then complaining about not having anything to wear after taking them off and then being just too damn lazy to fetch his own boxers
@StillRain for having a magnificent vag
@InThe312 for blatant sucking-up
@AuntieDisco for way too long a nomination. Ugggh reading stuff sucks
@SalaciousMonkey22 for being a brat
@StillRain for self nominating when the panel of judge has previously ruled out self nominating on her watch – this is true – severe error from the OG panel of judge.
@Mrtenant for sarcasm used incorrectly
@Mrtenant for not understanding why he was wrong
@Mrtenant for emojis that don't work
@Mrtenant for actually wanting to win the WofW and for using the wrong abbreviation
@Amanda330 also nominated for starting the wrong abbreviation
@OrdinaryPerson for not realizing WOW is better x2
@OrdinaryPerson for the thirst
@Saltfountain for stalking @StillRain
@Saltfountain for not knowing driving stick is a big deal, as well as your car won't get stolen – the UK is still rolling it’s eyes…
@OrdinaryPerson for not realising everyone wants to win this prestigious and glamorous award. They just don’t want to admit it
@StillRain for being so far up her own arse she equates seeing a post on a thread @Saltfountain follows with stalking her...
@StillRain for posting in the show your face thread and making us all thirsty
@AuntieDisco Double nomination for 1. Making us read that and 2. No mention of while summoning @Lord Pmann
@StillRain for having Shiraz face poof before @Bry1313 saw it x 2
@Lmizzler for sucking up.

And thirst.
@Amanda330 and @Bry1313 for having better things to do than lit, then coming here with FOMO
@SirConradPeckereye for pairing up with the worst
@OrdinaryPerson for assuming @salaciaousmonkey22 watche TV instead of post slutting
@OrdinaryPerson after shaming @SirConradPeckereye for pairing "with the worst" after THEY made him by saying "no" to the request.
@StillRain for making funny with the shitest panel of judge in living and indeed all future memory.
@devilsanus for thinking that they have any say in the rules
@OrdinaryPerson and @Bry1313 for basically merging into one poster – twas only a matter of time – alts will be alts…
@crazychemgirl for this saying before even seeing their picture
@Wand3rlust for being so…. Judgey
@Wand3rlust for always killing Sirconradpeckereye, will not pass GO, will not collect $200
@Mrtenant for attention whoring
@crazychemgirl for repeating @SirConradPeckereye ‘s mistake of stupidly thinking wankers could share or some bullshit
@crazychemgirl again for repeating @SirConradPeckereye ‘s mistake and excluding herself when it’s very clear that all three of them deserve it.
@StillRain for not identifying as the pot or the kettle
@SalaciousMonkey22 Triple nominated for tagging the same post TWICE and for not including himself as all four deserve it
@GSDom for being rude. And also not realising that @Wand3rlust is totally not a wanker, and is adorable
@GSDom for sucking up to one of the all time wankers
@GSDom for massive sucking up.
@Bry1313 –for being a whiney arse – this is now a recurring standard nomination until the demise of these awards

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

So - the final nominations for the greatest tenure of panel of judge since the OG are in...

@Lmizzler for guest judge or wanker … cuz he’s so absent
@Wand3rlust because @crazychemgirl missese her snark adorableness in shenanigans – aw – thanks!
Plus @deft @Daisy_Love and @ShaneoD – although those lot are for snark.
@SalaciousMonkey because keeping you sluts in line ain't easy!
@OrdinaryPerson because she won't audition with @SirConradPeckereye for the Amazing Race
@Wand3rlust for summoning @Lord Pmann and not mentioning
@crazychemgirl for trying to pass that tagging a litster is different to naming a litster
@StillRain for not understanding it’s better
@Bry1313 for not speaking the language
@Photog1rl for utilisation of the word throuple
@SalaciousMonkey22 for forcing @crazychemgirl to cancel the awards and thereby upsetting @Indie
@PrettyLilPussy19 for being gone sooooooo soooooo longgggg
@Indie for suggesting @StillRain ‘s vagina is cringe worthy.
@InThe312 for abandoning @StillRain for a hookers and blow weekend with the boys
@jason28053 for the suggestion of flippant nominations
@Indie for sucking up
@Indie for unscrupulous flirting.
@StillRain for making @Indie Google unscrupulous
@Bry1313 and @SirConradPeckereye for bragging about bring able to drive 'stick' like it's some kind of fucking achievement – the whole of the UK rolls it’s eyes…
@Saltfountain for suggesting it's nothing
@Saltfountain for not understanding when a tongue is firmly planted in a cheek
@Lord Pmann for his ridiculous idea of built-in boxers pants, then complaining about not having anything to wear after taking them off and then being just too damn lazy to fetch his own boxers
@StillRain for having a magnificent vag
@InThe312 for blatant sucking-up
@AuntieDisco for way too long a nomination. Ugggh reading stuff sucks
@SalaciousMonkey22 for being a brat
@StillRain for self nominating when the panel of judge has previously ruled out self nominating on her watch – this is true – severe error from the OG panel of judge.
@Mrtenant for sarcasm used incorrectly
@Mrtenant for not understanding why he was wrong
@Mrtenant for emojis that don't work
@Mrtenant for actually wanting to win the WofW and for using the wrong abbreviation
@Amanda330 also nominated for starting the wrong abbreviation
@OrdinaryPerson for not realizing WOW is better x2
@OrdinaryPerson for the thirst
@Saltfountain for stalking @StillRain
@Saltfountain for not knowing driving stick is a big deal, as well as your car won't get stolen – the UK is still rolling it’s eyes…
@OrdinaryPerson for not realising everyone wants to win this prestigious and glamorous award. They just don’t want to admit it
@StillRain for being so far up her own arse she equates seeing a post on a thread @Saltfountain follows with stalking her...
@StillRain for posting in the show your face thread and making us all thirsty
@AuntieDisco Double nomination for 1. Making us read that and 2. No mention of while summoning @Lord Pmann
@StillRain for having Shiraz face poof before @Bry1313 saw it x 2
@Lmizzler for sucking up.

And thirst.
@Amanda330 and @Bry1313 for having better things to do than lit, then coming here with FOMO
@SirConradPeckereye for pairing up with the worst
@OrdinaryPerson for assuming @salaciaousmonkey22 watche TV instead of post slutting
@OrdinaryPerson after shaming @SirConradPeckereye for pairing "with the worst" after THEY made him by saying "no" to the request.
@StillRain for making funny with the shitest panel of judge in living and indeed all future memory.
@devilsanus for thinking that they have any say in the rules
@OrdinaryPerson and @Bry1313 for basically merging into one poster – twas only a matter of time – alts will be alts…
@crazychemgirl for this saying before even seeing their picture
@Wand3rlust for being so…. Judgey
@Wand3rlust for always killing Sirconradpeckereye, will not pass GO, will not collect $200
@Mrtenant for attention whoring
@crazychemgirl for repeating @SirConradPeckereye ‘s mistake of stupidly thinking wankers could share or some bullshit
@crazychemgirl again for repeating @SirConradPeckereye ‘s mistake and excluding herself when it’s very clear that all three of them deserve it.
@StillRain for not identifying as the pot or the kettle
@SalaciousMonkey22 Triple nominated for tagging the same post TWICE and for not including himself as all four deserve it
@GSDom for being rude. And also not realising that @Wand3rlust is totally not a wanker, and is adorable
@GSDom for sucking up to one of the all time wankers
@GSDom for massive sucking up.
@Bry1313 –for being a whiney arse – this is now a recurring standard nomination until the demise of these awards

Jesus Christ. You need a lay down after typing all that.

 

[Wand3rlust]

And so. The moment is here.
My final act as the outgoing panel of judge is to announce that....

After THE most lacklustre campaign to win...…


View attachment 2343822

Congratulations, @Mrtenant - your desire to win, only being outweighed by your sheer lack of ability to muster any enthusiasm into putting ANY effort in at all, did not go unnoticed in the sea of wankery that has occurred over the final days of my tenure. I can only hope that your actual wanking inspires more energy but yet yields the same results.

Happy wanking - if you can be bothered....

And so, my lovely wanker and wankettes - the moment you have all been dreading is here. The tears of joy that heralded my arrival after the debacle of the prior panel of judge - aka 'The Worst' - aka 'Whiney @Bry1313 ' are only now exceeded by the tears of your sorrow and heartbreak at who will follow.

Never fear - the OG panel of judge could surely not fuck up as monumentally as she did in March... so keep that hope in your heart, your cocks and pussies in your hands, and wank on through the month of May and beyond.

I will miss you. No. I really will.
uh huh.

Laters!!!

 

[Mrtenant]

And so. The moment is here.
My final act as the outgoing panel of judge is to announce that....

After THE most lacklustre campaign to win...…

View attachment 2343821
View attachment 2343822

Congratulations, @Mrtenant - your desire to win, only being outweighed by your sheer lack of ability to muster any enthusiasm into putting ANY effort in at all, did not go unnoticed in the sea of wankery that has occurred over the final days of my tenure. I can only hope that your actual wanking inspires more energy but yet yields the same results.

Happy wanking - if you can be bothered....

And so, my lovely wanker and wankettes - the moment you have all been dreading is here. The tears of joy that heralded my arrival after the debacle of the prior panel of judge - aka 'The Worst' - aka 'Whiney @Bry1313 ' are only now exceeded by the tears of your sorrow and heartbreak at who will follow.

Never fear - the OG panel of judge could surely not fuck up as monumentally as she did in March... so keep that hope in your heart, your cocks and pussies in your hands, and wank on through the month of May and beyond.

I will miss you. No. I really will.
uh huh.

Laters!!!

I am so.....
Whelmed

Not really overwhelmed or underwhelmed. Just whelmed. Errr.... thaanks!

I will keep this trophy under the bed along with some used tissues, crusty socks, and old porn mags- which, can't be looked at anymore as the pages are all stuck together.

Tonight, I'm going to celebrate with a watermelon. I'll be thinking of this award as I prepare it for uhhhh consumption, yea consumption is a good word. Along with candlelights and some tasty Barry White tunes.

Pay per view on my Onlyfans. Hit me up with a PM for the discount code and link.

Thanks again.

 

[InThe312]

https://media.giphy.com/media/g0JP0HG6zF0o8/giphy.gif?cid=790b7611na5mn2iwrz3mqdsde75dk24bu9k61zi9af2q64pq&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

Thank goodness that overplayed, tension (not) building, delay of the inevitable is over. With that, we enter the rein of what history will call the greatest panel of judge since the OPoJ.

I'm left with a short week, but have the privilege of declaring the first ever Jedi Wanker on May the 4th. Get your nominations going. This week's prize is certain to be better than ever.

And poor @ToPleaseHim. You will be a standing nomination during my tenure, for your ban treatment of poor ol' Dickie. Maybe you'll win and get off the list, but your wankery elsewhere has really been subpar.